Chapter twelve: Fly You Piece of Shit!

"Shit! Lemo, the train is moving and the guys aren't here!" Andy said jumping up and down in her seat.

"Well, what am I going to do? What are we going to do?" Lemo said, jumping up and down too.

"Well guys, they'll be on the train. They probably just can't find our compartment," Mione reasoned.

"Bloody Barry! What's he fucking doing?"

Emo looked up from her magazine,

"Can you two please stop the bouncing? You're kind of moving the whole compartment."

"What! No we're not! How heavy do you think we are?"

"You are kind of moving it..."

Lemo and Andy tried to look upset, still jumping up and down.

"Oh my fucking god!" Andy stood up suddenly on her seat, bumping her head on the ceiling of the compartment, "Jesus Christ mother fucker!" Andy screamed.

"Christians must hate you..." Lemo said.

"Shuddup! I have an idea!" Andy said diving for her backpack and began rummaging around inside.

"You have an idea! Wow, there's always a first...aww and poor Drew missed out on you big moment!"

Andy reappeared from the depths of her backpack, looking rather ruffled, clutching her cell phone.

"Andy, you're brilliant! Give Drew a call!"

Andy grinned,

"See, I'm capable of being intelligent!" She examined her phone then added, "Now, which is the thing I speak into again?"

"Rise! Rise! Rise!" Andrew commanded pulling up the corners of the green carpet.

"Maybe we need to lose some weight off this thing..." Barry said thoughtfully.

"I vote we leave Don in the car!" Andrew reached for the still unconscious Don.

"No," Barry said firmly, "I was thinking more some of the extra crap we have in these trunks..."

"NO! Not my crap! That's precious crap, useful crap. I need that crap!"

Barry rolled his eyes,

"Well, I think that's what holding us down. All the extra weight we have on this thing."

"OR this magic carpet isn't the magic we know, it's just some snot coloured carpet with no magical qualities."

"That mean I was right before then..."

"You don't have to - What the fuck is that?"

"What?"

"Listen..."

"To what exa-"

"Shut up!"

The boys sat frozen, listening to the sound of the Ompa Lompa tune.

"Where is that -" Barry began when Andrew, whipped his cell phone out of his pocket.

"Hello?"

"DREW!" Andy's voice roared out of the ph, Andrew held the phone at arms length, "CAN YOU HEAR ME!"

"Uh, yes I can Am, you don't-"

"YOU CAN? WOW, THESE THINGS ARE NOT AS STUPID AS THEY SEEM! SO...WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU!"

"I'm at the train station -"

"STILL! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THERE?"

"The barrier, it wouldn't let us in and -"

"IS MRS. WEASEL THERE?"

"No, we haven't seen her come through yet -"

"DREW! CAN...HEAR...STILL? SORRY...NO...YOU'RE...! UP!" Andy's voice cracked and disappeared, 'Call ended' flashed on Andrew's phone.

"Fuck, the train must be going to the country side now!" Andrew groaned as he put the phone in his bag.

Barry sighed,

"How are we going to get to school?"

Andrew shook his head,

'No idea, Barry. No idea...I guess this really was a piece of muggle crap...Sorry Barry..."

Barry sighed again,

"It's not your fault Andrew, at least you suggested something."

"Hmm..." Andrew played distractedly with the carpet's tassels on the side, until his fingers got caught up in the tassels, "Oh great, and now my fingers get fucking tangled with the fucking crappy carpet!" He tugged at the tassels in hope of freeing his hands, only the carpet made an odd noise as he pulled at the tassels. The sound of a lawn mower.

"Okay, this is one loopy carpet..." Andrew commented as he continued to yank at the tassels, the noise becoming louder and louder until they began to rise from the ground.

"Drew! You're a genius!"

"I am?"

"Yes! Pull harder at the tassels that have your hand stuck in!"

"Why...? Barry, I think you're as loopy as the carpet..."

"No! Drew hasn't you noticed? We're floating!"

"Huh?" Andrew looked around him, they were floating a few inches above the ground, "Would you look at that!"

"Now do it quick, so we rise quicker and the muggles don't notice..."

"Aye, Aye Cap'ain!" Andrew began to pull more vigorously at the tassels.