AN- Yep, I didn't die. I've just been stuck on this chapter. I couldn't think of anything to throw in here. But I'm back now, so yay. We are down to the last six fighters, if everyone remembers.

Mario v Falco

Luigi v Kirby

Marth v Gannon

Exciting stuff, huh? Well, I hope so. I won't bore you with too long an author's note, but I would like to just say a few things. First off, I have a newsletter that I do now. Once a week, I send out a newsletter to let everyone know what's going on with my fanfiction. I also throw out ideas if I'm stuck, so people can respond. If you would like to be added to the mailing list, please leave your name and email in a review so I know where to send it to.

Second thing, I am going to try to learn flash, so I can import this story into short flash animation films using sprites. If anyone has any proficiency in this filed, please let me know so I might ask you some questions. Or if anyone knows of any good tutorial sites, that would also help.

Lastly, I am going to be posting several comics of mine online soon, a few originals, as well as maybe some Nintendo ones and some Dragonball Z ones. If interested, please let me know, though once it is online I will post the website here for everyone to see.

I think that covers everything. It is probably time to start the show, eh?

Mario's Pad- The Mushroom Kingdom- 8:33PM

Mario sighed, deeply satisfied by the evening's meal. He plopped himself down on the couch and patted his stomach.

Luigi walked in, a stern look on his face. "Mario! Aren't you gonna help clean the dishes?"

Mario shook his head as he reached for the television remote. "No, I don't think I am."

Luigi growled softly as he began to wipe a glass with his dishrag. "How you became a hero I'll never know…"

Mario shrugged. "Maybe it's because I… oh, I don't know, beat Bowser and saved the Princess?"

Luigi shook his head as he turned to head back into the kitchen. As Mario hit the power button on the remote, the voice of the local news anchor flooded into the room.

"This just in, local authorities have found the slaughtered and headless body of Mushroom Kingdom's own beloved Princess Peach Toadstool. The culprit has been named, but as of yet, has not been apprehended." The television flashed a picture of Falco, a crazed look across his face. "Eyewitnesses say this bird is the murderer, but all attempts at capturing him have ended in failure thus far. In light of this new tragedy, the question on everyone's mind is, 'Where is Mario?'"

The news report suddenly flashed off, and an image of Bugs Bunny filled the screen. Luigi stared at his brother in disbelief as the Italian plumber began laughing loudly at the antics of the animated rabbit.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Mario looked up from his cartoons with frown. "What do you mean? I'm watching Looney Tunes!"

"But what about the princess?"

Mario shrugged. "What about her? She's dead. Weren't you paying attention?"

"But wasn't she your girlfriend?"

The hero in red shook his head. "Nah, I just had sex with her a lot."

Luigi raised an eyebrow. "And what, exactly, was the difference?"

Mario sat back, resting his head on the cushions of the couch. "The difference? If she were my girlfriend, I woulda had to buy her presents."

Luigi nodded sagely as he went to put his boots on. "Women, huh?"

Mario bit back a chuckle. Luigi glared at his older brother. "What?"

Mario tried his hardest not to smile. "What would you know about women?"

Luigi's face went as red as Mario's hat. "What's that supposed to mean?"

The last hero smiled as he turned back to his show. "Nothing. Forget it."

Luigi growled under his breath. "What? That wasn't nothing!"

"Oh yeah? Enlighten me. What experience do you have with women?"

"What about Daisy?"

Mario nearly choked on his spit as he exploded with laughter. "You haven't slept with Daisy!"

Luigi's eyes narrowed and his hands clenched into fists. "Yes I have!"

Mario's laughter died down a bit as he saw his brother's serious face. "Really?"

Luigi nodded.

Mario grinned as he got up and slapped Luigi on the back. "She's a hell of a lay, isn't she?"

Luigi's jaw dropped in shock. "You didn't…"

Mario sat back down on the couch and grinned. "I saved her from those aliens way back in the day. That's the standard fee for a princess rescue. On the plane on the way back."

Luigi grabbed his wallet, trying to hide the indignation on his face. How come he gets everything first…? "Whatever. I have to run to the store and get some shopping done. We'll talk later."

The sound of a door being slammed with unnecessary roughness echoed throughout the house as Luigi stormed off. Mario leaned back as he went back to watching television.

Town Square- The Mushroom Kingdom- 8:45 PM

What's going on? Why are goblins chasing me? Falco ran frantically through the streets of the Mushroom Kingdom, knocking down innocent bystanders as he fled. Everything seemed nothing more than a psychedelic blur to him as he viewed the world through his overdosed mind. Too many pills had stripped away reality itself, leaving the bird's overactive imagination in charge. Several guard toads had been chasing him through the town, but his erratic manner caused them to keep their distance. They found themselves hoping Mario would show up soon.

Falco stumbled past a pair of stunned toads, spinning around a corner and crashing into someone carrying a bunch of groceries. The groceries fell from the bag, creating a huge mess over the person who had dropped them. Falco managed to pull himself up, quickly looking both ways before sprinting off into the distance.

The pursing toad guards stopped near the pile of destroyed goods and frowned. From under the heap of food, muffled Italian cursewords could be heard. They pulled off a bunch of broken eggs to find Luigi's angered face, covered in egg goop.

One of the toads shook his head in disappointment. "We almost had him, but you let him slip through your fingers… Why couldn't you have gotten Mario to come get him?"

Luigi hung his head, mentally cursing the day he was born.

Mario's Pad- The Mushroom Kingdom- 9:00PM

Mario's laughs slowly died away as he turned off the TV. "Man, I love cartoons…" He hoisted himself out of the couch, slowly making his way towards the kitchen for a snack. He stopped in abject horror as he stepped into the kitchen, however.

Falco looked up, completely covered in food. Mayonnaise was smeared all over his body, bits of tomato hung from his beak, and a whole glazed ham was sticking out of his sleeve. With wide, twitching eyes, he turned to Mario and gave him a shaky smile.

"If you disguise yourself, the goblins won't get you." Falco said matter of factly, turning back to the refrigerator, pulling out a bowl of leftover spaghetti.

Mario stood stunned for a moment, unsure of exactly how to react. He quickly found out he didn't have to, however, as the bird dumped the spaghetti over his head, and seemingly satisfied, got up and walked over to the plump Italian.

"Are you mad? If you don't hurry up, they'll get you! Quickly, man! Use the ranch dressing!" Falco ripped the top off of a bottle of dressing and poured it on Mario's head.

Mario wiped away the ranch from his eyes, and for the first time got a good look at the food man. Minus the spaghetti and the ham, he kinda looks like… hey!

"You're the guy they're looking for! You killed Peach!"

Falco looked up with a fearful expression. "You're with them, aren't you?" Falco tried to get a good look at him, and shook his head. He jumped backwards and pointed an shaking accusing finger.

"You're their king! The king of the goblins!"

Mario cocked his head to one side, ranch dripping off of his hat. Falco rushed forward, throwing out a kick in self defense. Mario barely had time to roll out of the way, spaghetti sauce and ranch dressing falling all over the kitchen. But Falco continued his crazed assault, pulling out his blaster and firing at random.

Several bolts hit into the walls, shattering dishes and glasses. One came right at Mario, but he whipped out his cape, smacking the energy blast and knocking it back toward the insane bird, knocking the gun out of his hands.

With a deft movement contrary to his size, Mario dove at Falco, wrestling him down and pinning him to the ground. Falco struggled for a minute, and then suddenly stopped, closing his eyes.

From out of nowhere, Falco's energy expanded, creating an aura of fire around him. With Mario still clinging to him, he shot up into the air, breaking through the ceiling and landing on the roof. They both prepared for another round when the sound of an afterburner startled them.

"Falco!"

Falco looked up in surprise to find an Arwing hovering slightly above Mario's pad. Peppy stuck his head out and smiled at his friend.

"Falco, it's me, Peppy! Listen, me and the guys have been talking…"

Mario scratched his chin as he watched the unfolding scene with morbid curiosity.

Falco threw his wings up in the air. "Can this what? I have to beat the King of the Goblins!"

Peppy looked at Mario and gave him a sheepish wave. "Um, sorry about this… He just isn't well."

Mario nodded. "I can tell!"

Peppy turned back to Falco and reached out with his hand. "Come with me, Falco. You have a problem."

"I know! These damn Goblins keep trying to kill me! Use the lasers on the Arwing!"

Peppy's hand touched Falco's, and he grasped at his feathers. "Please, friend! We can help you!"

Falco looked at his friend, seeming to be contemplating something. "Well… can I use the radio?"

Peppy nodded, but inside he was crushed. This means more of that Britney Spears… damn it to hell…

Falco jumped into the Arwing and waved at Mario. "Later, Goblin King!" He turned to Peppy. "So, where are we going?"

Peppy shook his head as they took off. "A little place called Shady Acres. You'll love it there. Everyone there is very nice, and they'll help you get better."

As they flew off, the last thing Mario heard was Falco's voice. "Sweet. Will there be cookies?"

There was a bit of silence as Mario sat and contemplated what had just occurred. Suddenly, the sound of a door slamming reverberated in the air. Mario heard the sound of air being intaken in shock.

"What the hell happened to my kitchen?" Luigi's voice wailed.

Mario's eyes went wide as he stared off into the distance. A small curse escaped his lips.

"Fuck."

AN- There you guys go! Another new chapter, finally! Sorry it took so long, but I think this chapter was worth it. I actually laughed several times while writing this one, and that doesn't normally happen. Hope you all enjoy! And just in case it wasn't obvious enough, Falco is now institutionalized, so Mario wins!

Mario v Falco (Mario wins!)

Luigi v Kirby (Next time!)

Gannon v Marth (No witty comments to insert here!)