Disclaimer: I own NOTHING -sniff- espcially Severus and Lily... -sniff sniff- They belong all to J.K Rowling...
First attempt at story fics... Please don't be harsh... I'm still a newbieat stories... okie?
The black family bell reverberated through out the whole house in a deep gong note. Lupin put down his copy of the daily prophet and left his red velvet chair by the fireplace, heading to the door. The door was huge and intricate carvings littered it. The grasped the cold handle and turned, at the exact time, his eyes widened with shock. A woman stood before him. Her red locks fell gracefully down her shoulders and her eyes like emeralds sparkled. She was soaking wet in the rain and the wind gently howled and caressed her flaming red hair.
"Hello Remus." She said suppressing the longing in her voice.
"Li...Lily?" he managed to choke out.
"Lily is that you?" he asked staring at her, trying to believe that she was some illusion not real flesh and blood.
"Yes." She smiled and hugged him tight.
"But how?" he spluttered under her bone crushing hug.
"I'll tell you in the kitchen."
"Merlin! I got to tell Harry!" Lupin said accepting the fact that she was more than real.
Soon there were cries of joys and tears from the loved ones. Sirius was celebrating with a huge flagon of butter beer, clanging of mugs could be heard from the kitchens and everyone was wondering how this miracle that Lily Potter could have survived.
"Mum, tell us how did you survive?" Harry asked eagerly, the same green eyes looked back at their predecessor.
"I also am not very sure, dear. After I got hit then I sort of ended some place I did not know then someone told me to go back and I have been living with Muggles somewhere in a small village."
Everyone was too high to ask her anything else and was all too glad that she survived that night. Avada Kedavra survivor "number two". There were more shouts of joy and Lily caught up with Molly and Arthur who was fussing over her like she was just a child, making sure her every whim was taken care of. The celebrations went on into the night and soon it was bedtime for the kids and meeting time for the order. The usual argument resumed and it took all of Mrs Weasley's commanding voice to send them off to bed.
"Mum can you do something about it?" Harry pleaded. He was desperate for knowledge of what the order had been doing. Any knowledge was good knowledge for him.
"I'm sorry dear, but you cannot. Now go and have a good night's rest." Lily said patiently.
The doors suddenly burst open and a thin and gaunt man stood there completely clad in black. His cold empty eyes scanned the scene and fell at last on the red head that was standing right in front of him. The room went quiet.
"Severus?" Lily said surprisingly weak.
Snape's eyes flashed and he turned back sharply and strode out of the room in a flurry of his black robes.
Harry looked confusedly at the two and Ron issued a big "Huh?" The whole room turned silent at the actions of Snape and tension grew. Lily started to walk towards the door but Mrs Wesley held her back.
"Give him time dear." She muttered but Harry caught it. He looked at his mother in hope that she would explain but she did not look at him and stared outside the door.
"Off to bed all of you!" commanded Mrs Weasley and they obeyed.
"Hey mate, did you see Snape?" Ron asked.
"Yeah, it was like mum was like a disease. That git." Harry replied bitterly.
"Come on you guys there is obviously something more right?" Hermione pointed.
They stopped talking as Snape strode past them; he was in deep thought and was cursing under his breath. He strode past them quickly without even passing a snide comment or sneer.
"That's weird." Muttered Ron under his breath so that Snape would not her him.
"Did you see him wringing his hands? He must be really upset or nervous about something." Hermione said after Snape was out of earshot.
"I was more preoccupied with the fact that he did not insult us or anything. Ever since mum arrived, he's been acting strangely. The kitchen and now this." Harry wondered and he suddenly turned back just like Snape did and headed in the direction of the potions master.
"Harry what are you doing?" Ron hissed.
"I'm going to clarify things." Harry said blandly.
"Harry, don't. It'll make matters worst." Hermione advised but the raven-haired boy went on with reckless bravery, his two friends followed trying to talk him out of what ever he was planning to do.
After a few turns, Harry suddenly stopped and Ron and Hermione nearly crashed into him considering the speed they were at before.
"What?" Ron demanded.
"Ron you stepped on my foot!"
"Shush!" Harry said motioning them to keep quiet. Voices came from the corridor and Harry strained to listen to what they were saying.
"Severus we need to talk." Came his mother's voice, half pleading, and half commanding.
"We can talk later." Snape said plainly.
"Severus, please." Lily begged. Harry poked his head out a bit and the two friends followed. Lily caught Snape's wrist and looked at him. Her green eyes looked almost pleading at him. Her red hair, as always, was flowing down her shoulders.
"Fine." He said and attempted to get away but Lily stopped him.
"Midnight at the library?"
Snape paused for a while before nodding and strode off while Lily half jogged to keep up with his pace.
Harry retracted and turned round to walk back up the corridor he came from, questions burning.
"What do you think they are doing?" Ron asked.
"Don't know, perhaps some of the stuff for the order." Hermione suggested.
"Nah can't be. If not they would have said it at the order meeting and not in a corridor." Harry said, dismissing her idea.
"Midnight at the library huh?" Ron said as he yawned.
Harry suddenly stopped walking. Why hadn't he thought of this before? The invisibility cloak of course! His eyes shone and Ron and Hermione saw that.
"Harry, you aren't thinking of using your cloak are you?" Hermione said cautiously.
"Yes I am." Harry said smiling.
"But Harry! You can't just go bursting into their conversation just like that!" Hermione exclaimed.
"Go for it mate!" urged Ron.
"I cannot stand you two, if trouble is what you find, don't come crying back to me. I have tried to stop you but you wouldn't listen. My job here is done. Goodnight boys." Hermione said and stalked off to her room.
"Women, you'll never understand them." Ron muttered, but Harry was in deep thought.
"Oh go on Harry, you need the answers."
"Ron maybe Hermione is right, we shouldn't invade their privacy." Harry said and Ron looked at him in disbelief.
"She has really gotten to your head has she?" Ron chided.
"Yes." Harry answered somewhat apologetically.
"Harry, don't you want to know what's going on?" Ron asked looking him in the eye.
"Yes, but-" Harry started but got cut off by Ron.
"And do you want to know what secrets they have?" Ron continued.
"Yes but-" Harry started again.
"What if they have something to say that concerns you? You would want to know right?"
"Yes but-" Harry said very irritated now.
"Then go on Harry. No one would know."
Harry thought for a while. What if they were talking about the secret weapon that the order had been keeping so secretly now. What if they were talking about the order and what they did. What if they were talking about Snape's loyalty? Then Harry finally decided.
"I will go." He said.
"That's the spirit!" beamed Ron. " You will tell me everything right?"
"Sure mate.' Harry promised as they walked back to the room to play exploding Snap.
Time passed quickly and soon it was eleven fifty. Harry went to his trunk and got his cloak out.
"I'll wait up for you, tell me what they say ok?" Ron asked.
"Sure." Harry replied as he stepped out of the door, invisible.
Harry headed to the library and went in, he closed the door silently and was amazed at his luck that the door did not groan at all, seeing that it's hinges were at least a century old. The library was totally dark and the pale moonlight shone through the glass windows.
Harry tiptoed round the library barefooted making sure there was no sound. Snape was already in the dark library and was seated at one of the tables. His fingertips touching each other and elbows rested on the tables. Harry was slightly unnerved seeing that there was no trace of the evil, sarcastic professor persona in him. There was no scowl or sneer on his face. He looked deep in thought and perhaps even somewhat vulnerable. This was not the Severus Snape he had known, the man in front of him had the same body as the frightening professor but he was somewhat different.
The door opened again and in stepped his mother. Snape remained in his usual position, not even bothering to look up or not even noticing her. Lily looked beautiful in the moonlight. Her skin almost shone out in the darkness, radiating it with her own source of light. He red locks flowing down and her green eyes sparkling. She walked over to the completely still Snape and placed a hand gently on his shoulder. At first he did not move and after a minute of complete stillness and silence, he finally spoke.
"Why did you come back?" there was no iciness in his voice and not a trace of a sneer. Yet, it sounded vulnerable and perhaps afraid? Harry moved closer to them.
"You know why I came back." She replied gently.
"Remind me again." He said softly.
"Harry and you."
The word 'you' caught Harry of guard and his jaw dropped. He quickly suppressed a gasp and continued to listen.
"Me? Lily we have already discussed this. Everything is in the past now. Just forget it." Snape replied bitterly.
"Why Severus? Why do you want to forget everything?" she asked sadly.
"God damn it, Evans. Don't you understand? You coming back and all, now is the prime of the dark lord again. I now even wish you never came back or even still never existed." Snape said voice going a bit louder.
Anger coursed through Harry's veins after Snape finished. He wished that his mother had never come back or even never existed. He stared at him with hatred through the cloak.
"Severus please, give this one last chance." Lily said stung by his words.
"No. It will never work. It did not years ago what makes you think it would now?"
"My feelings." She replied blandly. "For once, god, follow your heart. -"
"If we weren't meant we would have part. I know." He said a bit frustrated.
"You remember?" she asked.
"Of course I remembered, everything I've tried so hard to forget. The times sneaking away from Avery and Rosier, you from Potter and Black, I remember all. I cannot bind you with my taints, for you were my one and only saint."
"I remember that part, but Severus, I took many risks, I'm sure you did too, to escape our houses, our friends, our crew. Does this mean nothing? Our efforts and all, to keep this alive-"
"And yet not to fall." Snape cut in. "Lily, please, you know me, my history, my background. We cannot, it's impossible for us." He said with a hint of desperation in his voice.
Snape then stood up and faced her. He was almost one head above her and she looked up at him, her green eyes burning with hope. Harry stared at them, brain sagging under the weight of everything.
"Severus." Lily began and reached out to him, but Snape caught her by her wrist.
"So I think that it's best that we forever part, forget about all the things, right from the start." He said in one breath.
"No Severus, I know you love me, I really do. So stop depriving yourself, cos' I love you too." Lily said her voice shaking. Harry looked in disbelief.
Lily fell into Snape's arms and sniffed. Snape held her gently and whispered, "I know this isn't easy, it would never be. But I think that Potter can, fill the space for me."
"Severus please." Lily said but her voice was muffled.
"No Lily this cannot work. It can never work."
"Severus please." Lily said voice growing softer.
"Forget everything, forget that I even existed."
Lily just shook her head now sobbing.
"Forget everything right from the start."
"I can't Severus, I really can't." Lily looked up to him, tears glistening in the moonlight.
"You are a Potter now, you chose James, you have Harry now." Snape said, pausing before 'Harry'.
"I can't forget you, Severus." She started to sob again.
"And you shall forever haunt me too."
"Please don't try so hard to say goodbye." Lily whispered.
"No I have to. You reopen old wounds, Evans. I cannot let that happen."
"Please Severus." She said looking into his black eyes.
"I'm sorry Lily." He said as he let her go, forever.
Lily wiped her tears and started to head for the door.
"We would only meet with wands drawn in the end," Snape whispered.
"Thank you and Goodbye my sweet Lily Evans." He continued a little louder and Lily stopped, her hand on the doorknob. She turned around and looked at him, her eyes were dulled by the defeat.
"Severus." She whispered as Snape walked up to her.
"Please understand." He said gently.
"No Severus I will never understand, I would never forget anything either." She replied before walking out of the library.
Snape took a minute to calm himself first before waking out.
Harry just stood there transfixed. He walked out of the library in a daze, wondering what to tell Ron. The voice of his mother haunted him still.
No Severus I will never understand, I would never forget anything either.
At the other side of the house, Snape thought to himself.
She would never understand, I would never forget either...
Thanks for reading! Please R&R!
P/S If you want the full version of the poems, go to my I'm Sorry it would be all there...
Lastly remember to R&R!