Fractured Psyches

Chapter 1

Setting the papers aside on his desk, Alex sighed. Paperwork. Scott had gotten awfully obsessed with paperwork since becoming headmaster - mission reports, status reports, fitness reports. It was almost like working for the government again. Possibly worse.

He blamed Emma.

He looked over at the pile containing the last of the forms, and picked up the one on the top.

Polaris. Lorna Dane.

His jaw clenched involuntarily, hand tightening its hold on the paper. Lorna wasn't recovering from her experiences in Genosha as well, or as quickly, as he might have hoped. Still subject to fugue states, emotional outbursts, evidencing serious lapses in judgment. Possibly hallucinating, given her recent allegation that something, who knew what, had "stared straight at her".

He couldn't understand any of it. It was just so at odds with the Lorna Dane he'd known all these years, lived with, nearly married. The one who'd bounced back with barely a blink from repeated episodes of possession, mind control, manipulation. She was like a stranger now, he realized, a lump forming in his throat, nearly choking him.

He knew who to blame for that too, he reminded himself as he set down the fitness report that stated she was making excellent progress, unconsciously ironing out the wrinkles with his hand. The irksome, annoying, childish idiot otherwise known as Bobby Drake. The bane of his existence nearly from the moment he'd awoken from his coma. He persisted in coddling her, patronizing her, taking advantage of her temporary instability to reinsert himself into her affections. Poisoning her against him, just as he'd somehow managed to do with Annie.

Not that Bobby honestly cared about Lorna. No, Alex was a bigger man than that. Had Bobby held legitimate feelings for Lorna, been good for her, he would have stepped aside. Not gladly, perhaps - he'd loved her far, far too long for that. But willingly, had that been what Lorna wanted.

But no, there was no reason to believe that Bobby honestly harbored any real feelings for his former girlfriend, or that Lorna was in any condition to make responsible decisions for herself at this time. It was painfully obvious that Drake's actions were a deliberate act of revenge against him for having proven himself the better man nearly a decade before. For having done so again, scant months before, when Annie had chosen him over the little icy moron.

He'd poisoned Annie against him, first. How, he didn't know, as the brunette emphatically insisted that he, not Bobby, had been the reason she'd left. Alex didn't believe a word of it. And now, Bobby had cold-heartedly turned his attention to Lorna, determined to do the same with her.

Standing so abruptly his chair teetered a few times before settling back on its wheels, Alex snatched the pile of fitness reports off his desk and headed off to Scott's rooms, the door closing emphatically behind him. This time, his brother was going to listen.

"Alex."

"Emma," he countered in greeting, inclining his head in recognition, then meeting the gaze of his brother's girlfriend levelly as she stood in the doorway of their shared quarters, her hand resting nonchalantly on the door jam. Somehow, Emma seemed to take up far more room than should've been physically possible through sheer presence alone. Scott had much the same knack.

Alex didn't, he knew. And it rankled deeply that she did.

"What brings you here?" she asked, tilting one perfectly manicured eyebrow ever so slightly as she stepped out of the doorframe, gesturing for him to enter.

"I need to talk to Scott about the team," he replied, eyes casting around the room. "Is he here?"

"In his office downstairs," Emma replied dismissively as he turned to look at her and saw the pointed expression on her face. "I do hope this isn't going to be just another whining session, Alexander. He's very busy today. Perhaps it's something you'd care to discuss with me instead?"

"No, it's not going to be a whining session," Alex informed her coolly, then took a deep breath, forcing himself to relax. He had no real problem with Emma, not really. Well, none except that she'd recently tried to kill him, but that had been the influence of the Golgotha creature, not really her. And the "relationship counseling" that seemed to land Gambit, Rogue, or both in the infirmary on a semi-regular basis of late, though he had to concede that the unresolved sexual tension between them negatively impacted the team dynamic. And then, there was the fact he kept expecting to see a ring in Scott's nose, considering the way she seemed to be pulling his brother's strings lately.

Well, ok. Maybe he did have a problem with Emma. But damned if he was about to admit it.

"I'm here to talk to Scott about the fitness reports," he replied calmly, rather proud of the casual smile he managed. "I'll just pop down to his office, then."

He forced himself not to tense as she assumed an almost amused expression. "It won't work, you know," she observed, settling down on the couch, draping her arm across the low back.

"What won't?" he asked, eyes narrowing slightly in confusion.

"Your campaign to remove Robert from the team," she replied, picking an imaginary speck of dust from her immaculate white trousers. "Scott's quite fond of him in his own way, and inclined to give him the benefit of the doubt. And I," again, her smile bordered on amused, "well, suffice to say that Robert has long been something of a protégé of mine. Perhaps your time would be better spent engaging in other pursuits? Which reminds me," she added, and he watched, his face impassive, as she leaned forward slightly once again, arching an eyebrow. "Whatever happened to that cute little nurse you were so fond of? Honestly, she could have at least given notice before scampering off to parts unknown. It's so difficult to find decent help these days, don't you think?"

"Annie," he replied through clenched teeth, "decided the Institute was an unsafe environment for Carter to grow up in. As you know. And while I appreciate your insight into the situation, when last I checked Scott was still making the final decisions on team complements. Or have you relieved him of that responsibility, too?" he asked, giving her a pointed look designed to let her know that he was on to her little game. He simply ignored the rest of her allegations for the moment, bracing himself with the certainty that Iceman's behavior on the last mission was certain cause for concern at the very least. Obviously, his secondary mutation had seriously de-hinged him. Yes, that was the approach he would use with Scott, setting aside any personal issues. Drake had attacked him, recently, more than once. Certainly sufficient cause for disciplinary action.

Instead of becoming defensive as he expected, however, Emma simply laughed delightedly and got to her feet.

"So, you intend to go to Scott and accuse me of helping him?" Emma asked. "Feel free, by all means, Alex. You're quite right, however - the team complement is his domain, not mine. So if you'll excuse me?" she added casually heading off toward the other room of the suite. "I'm afraid I'm late for an appointment with my advisees, and I really must change. Feel free to show yourself out," she added, closing the bedroom door behind her, leaving Alex staring angrily at the closed door.

Lorna kept her attention focused straight ahead on the far wall of the hallway as she passed through the throng of mingling students. Trying to ignore the furtive glances, the whispers as long-term students identified her to the newer ones.

Lorna Dane. Polaris. The crazy bitch who'd tried to kill the school nurse and who'd knocked out all the faculty. The daughter of the former ruler of Genosha, who'd later tried to level New York.

Lorna. The crazy X-Man. Not exactly a title she'd ever aspired to.

Of course, she admitted as she wrapped her arms more tightly around herself, eyes dropping to watch her feet as she continued down the hall, she'd never truly aspired to any title at all. Or to a codename, for that matter. She would've been perfectly happy, thank you very much, had she remained ignorant of her latent mutant potential and not spent the last ten years having her mind controlled by every two-bit telepath the X-Teams had ever encountered.

An overstatement? Possibly. But not anywhere near as much of one as she'd have preferred. And some days, when the voices of thousands of dying Genoshans haunted her mind, she half-wished another telepath would wander through and take over, just for the relief.

Days like today.

She'd had a nightmare again the night before, the first since she'd moved into Bobby's room. Whether it had been sparked by his dream or not she had no idea, but she'd woken trembling with fear, a vision of Alex's hard-set face swimming before her eyes and accusations that everything that had happened in Genosha had been her fault echoing in her ears.

Which, in a way, she still felt it was. They'd practically worshipped her – her! - when she arrived there to confront Magneto about her paternity. In fact, they'd welcomed her as the heir presumptive of their homeland. It'd been staggering, more than a little captivating.

She'd still been trying to sort out her feelings, her anger at Magnus warring with the undeniable attraction of the people's adoration when the Sentinels arrived. She'd been unable to stop them from massacring the Genoshans, despite their cries for her to save them. Unable to do anything at all, despite a newfound conviction, formed in the ashes of the last hope of so many, that her father, Magneto, had been right all along. The humans would never, ever leave them in peace. Not unless forced to do so.

And, despite that, she'd turned her back on the people and run like a frightened child, just as she had from Alex's accusations in her dream.

She'd awoken from her nightmare shaking, clinging to Bobby, relieved that he merely shifted in his sleep to wrap his arm over her. He'd been sleeping poorly enough since Golgotha; he didn't need her waking him up, though she knew he'd be upset if he knew that he hadn't. But she'd gone back to sleep within minutes, snuggled up underneath his warm arm.

His arm had been warm.

The implications struck her suddenly, and she stopped walking, totally unaware of the stares of passers-by, no doubt wondering whether or not she'd gone off into another fugue state. She hadn't imagined it, though she wished she'd thought to open her eyes at the time, rather than simply having let the warmth and security lull her back to sleep. Not just not-freezing, thanks to the benefit of insulated unstable molecules. Warm.

It'd happened before, a few times. She'd woken, late in the night, and opened her eyes to find a flesh and blood Bobby Drake curled up with her. She'd doubted it then, especially after he'd assured her that she must have been dreaming. But this time she knew, with full certainty, that she hadn't imagined it. Which meant…

God, she wasn't entirely sure what it meant, actually. Screwing her eyes shut, she rubbed at the bridge of her nose as she considered the implications of a warm, almost definitely flesh and blood Bobby, who'd wrapped his arm over her during the night but woken up ice in the morning.

"You okay, Lorna?" she heard from behind her, and she dropped her hand from her face, forcing a slight smile as she turned to look at Rogue. The concern on the other woman's face was unmistakable and unsurprising.

After all, even her teammates knew she was the crazy X-Man.

"Just a sudden headache," she lied, pushing her hair back from her face and watching as Rogue crinkled her nose in sympathy.

"I hate those," the southerner replied, and Lorna let out an internal sigh of relief that she'd been willing to take the excuse at face value. "They just go and sneak up on ya outta nowhere sometimes. If you want, I can walk ya down to see Hank - I swear that man has somethin' in that lab of his that can fix near anything."

Lorna shook her head, feeling vaguely guilty about lying to Rogue, but knowing with full certainty that if she told the other woman the truth Rogue would just give her that look, the one she'd seen far too many times on far too many faces. That she'd then go on to explain, as if to a child, just why and how it was impossible, and try to convince her that it had been a dream, or a hallucination, or some other dysfunction of her generally dysfunctional mind.

Or…perhaps she wouldn't. But Lorna wasn't prepared to take the chance, not until she'd had an opportunity to think things through.

"No, it's gone now," she replied instead, ignoring the skeptical look Rogue shot her way.

"If ya say so," Rogue replied. "Y'know, Lorna, if you need to talk 'bout anything…" her voice tapered off as her gaze shifted to look over Lorna's shoulder, and Lorna turned to follow her gaze.

Lovely. Alex was storming across the hallway, a sheaf of papers in his hand. Lorna tried to suppress the sudden sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach and turned back to Rogue. Based on something Alex had mentioned in passing the day before, she had a pretty good idea what those papers were. And, most likely, why Alex was storming.

"Well, someone's got a bee in his shorts," she heard Rogue exclaim.

Lorna shrugged, grimacing. "Fitness reports," she stated flatly. "It's been nice working with you, Rogue," she added as she turned to walk away. She wasn't entirely sure why she'd been allowed to remain on the team as long as she had, but she strongly suspected some directive of Xavier's, prior to his departure. With him long gone…well, she knew as well as anyone that she was unsuited for missions. If nothing else, Golgotha had proven that.

"Lorna, wait!" Rogue called out.

Sighing, Lorna paused just long enough for Rogue to catch up, letting the other woman catch her wrist and spin her around by it, though she had no idea why she bothered. It was painfully self-evident that Alex was going to remove her from the team, if for no other reason than her adamant refusal to talk about what she'd seen in space. Nothing Rogue said could possibly change that, or make it hurt any less. The best she could realistically hope for at this point was that it wouldn't change Bobby's feelings for her once they were no longer working together. Despite their rather chaotic history, he'd been her lifeline to sanity, thus far.

She wasn't entirely sure what would happen to her without that. And she was really in no hurry to find out, now.

"You got no idea that's what Alex is upset about," Rogue asserted. "And you really need to stop this, y'know. Land sakes, you're no crazier than I am, running around with everyone else's voices in my head."

"Try a few million and then get back to me," Lorna snapped, instinctively pushing the other woman backwards with a forcefield, then shook her head and took a deep breath, squashing down her embarrassment as she watched Rogue catch her balance several feet away. "I'm sorry," she said in all honesty, dropping her eyes to the floor once again, her anger fleeing as quickly as it had surfaced.

"Maybe you should cut back on the caffeine, girl," Rogue grumbled.

Despite everything, Lorna smiled faintly as she looked up at her obviously unconcerned teammate. "Bobby says I need my meds checked," she volunteered with a hint of a smile. Somehow, despite the fact that she knew that should annoy her, it never really did. Other than the knowledge that he was probably right, which was irritating enough in itself.

"Yeah well, what does the walking popsicle know, anyway?" Rogue chuckled in turn. "He's one to talk, the way he was sulkin' his way around here for a couple of months. Talk about someone who could've used a high dosage of Prozac."

"He had cause," Lorna began, bristling defensively, but Rogue waved her hand dismissively.

"Not arguin' that, just saying - the way he was moping around and mood swinging, you'd've thought he was dying. Or pregnant," she added, and Lorna looked up to see a grin on the other woman's face. "That would have made the papers, I bet. But I swear, if I'd been around more at the time, I would've knocked some sense into the boy. 'least you've managed to convince the dork that bein' stuck as ice ain't -"

"He's not," Lorna blurted out, then raised her hand to her face and shook her head. So much for not bringing that up. Nonetheless, it was almost a relief to have the subject breached. She really wanted to talk it over with someone; someone other than Bobby, until she could get some idea as to what was going on. In any case, it wasn't all that likely Rogue would believe her.

"What'dya mean, he's not?" the other woman asked.

Lorna dropped her hand, surprised by the annoyance in Rogue's voice. Of anyone at the Institute other than Hank, she would have expected Rogue to be the most relieved that things might not be as they seemed. Instead, her teammate sounded indignant.

"So help me, if this has all been that boy's warped idea of a joke, he ain't gonna know what hit him…"

"Of course not!" Lorna snapped at her, then took a deep breath, forcing herself to calm down. It being Bobby, Rogue's assumption was…well, not warranted, but not out of the realm of possibility, either. Except, she knew better. Bobby was many things, but he wasn't really much of an actor, not for long durations. And there was no way he could have faked his way through this so long, not given his obvious distaste for his 'secondary mutation'. He very obviously believed he was stuck in his ice form. She just didn't understand why.

"He doesn't know," she forced out, shrugging. "And he doesn't believe me…" Her voice tapered off again. Why should he believe her? She wasn't entirely sure she believed herself.

"Maybe you'd best clue me in on what's going on then?" Rogue replied softly, tilting her head slightly as if analyzing Lorna's face. "C'mon, let's go get some coffee. You can tell me all about it."

"Thought you just said to limit my caffeine intake?" Lorna countered with a hint of a smirk, more than a little relieved that the other woman was taking her seriously. Maybe Rogue could figure out what was going on. She hoped so. It certainly wasn't making a whole lot of sense to her.

"Well, you can have decaf, then" Rogue replied as she began heading off toward the cafeteria, and Lorna chuckled a bit as she followed her, almost oblivious, for once, to the staring, whispering students who'd witnessed their conversation.

"I hate decaf," Lorna replied, wrinkling her nose. "I vote I drink real coffee, and you take your chances," she added with the first genuine smile she'd made since she'd gotten out of bed that morning.

Rogue waved her suggestion aside. "So, drink caffeinated, see where it gets ya. And then go burn it off in a session with Alex or something. Just stay away from me 'til you get it out of your system."

"Deal," Lorna replied, suppressing the shudder that surfaced as Rogue mentioned Alex's name, relieved that the other woman wasn't looking her way. Because…well, she didn't entirely think Bobby's concerns on the subject were justified, but she wasn't dismissing them completely, either. Given the nature of the history between herself and Alex Summers, she wasn't entirely willing to rule anything out. Safeties or no, she wasn't about to venture into the Danger Room with him alone. He'd tried to kill her at least once before. She wasn't about to give him a second chance.

One more reason, of course, for their history to remain just that. History.