oh my god! this document took about 9 tries to get it uploaded! It was so horrible! I was about to give up! But i didn't and voila! this chapter exists! yay! ok, so thank you to all my wonderful reviewers and the snow for giving me a day off from school. So here is the chapter, and enjoy!
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my little book of fairy tales that i got for christmas when i was little. please don't sue because i really do like to read that book some times. if you do sue, you would end up with my fairy tales book and i would be devestated.
Chapter 8: Naming Memories
Lorelai was wondering when Rory would get home. At the moment Lorelai was sitting on the couch with the TV on in front of her. She wasn't really watching it because it was something stupid. She was also too busy thinking about what had happened over the past few days and wondering how things would be in a few weeks; wondering how things would change.
She then got up and walked over to the window behind the couch. She stared outside. It was like a movie show all by itself. She watched Babette and Morey outside talking to the garden gnomes while she could see little kids playing on the sidewalk. She wondered if her little boy would ever be one of those kids that didn't listen when told to stay in the yard and play. The little boy she wanted was one who wanted to go fishing with his daddy, one who wanted to learn how to cook like his daddy, one who loved his mommy as much as his daddy did. No! Luke does not love me! He left! He may love our son, but he left because of me!
She then wondered why Luke just couldn't see that he could only make her life even more of a living hell by being there in her life. She couldn't hold her tears in when he was around. He was able to smash through her defenses and cross the mote of humor she surrounded herself with anytime anyone got too close. He was able to see right through her and that scared her. She never had full control of the situation when he was around.
What would life if Luke hadn't left and we had gotten back together? She thought to herself. Then he would have been there during the pregnancy. He would have gone shopping for baby clothes with her and maybe made a crib for their son. She could just see him doing those things. And then she thought, he would have been there to help me give birth to our little boy; our son; would have been there for me to curse at, and to give me a chance to cut off the blood flow to his hand. I may have even gotten away with throwing ice chips at him. She smiled at the thought of Luke having to dodge ice chips being thrown by her while she was giving birth. She then thought back to the day when Jake was born.
"Hey sugar! You look like you are about to pop!" Babette commented as Lorelai strolled down the sidewalk towards Weston's. She didn't care what Luke would have told her to do, she had not given up coffee. She had promised Rory that she would cut back, but she would not give it up!
"Yep! I am due the first of November. I swear that he is ready to come out now though!" she responded.
"well, you got a week and a half left!" she said. Babette was walking down the street holding some form of polish in her hand. Probably for her gnomes, Lorelai thought. "so, what's the name goin' be?" Babette asked. Lorelai had only told Rory what she planned to name the baby.
"Well you know I can't tell you that. You will just have to wait and see!" she said knowing the town was dying to know every little detail of its soon to be newest member. The town also was quite curious to see how Luke's child would turn out. They had never seen him as the one to contribute to the creation of a child. He was always 'Mr. anti-jam hands' man to them.
Lorelai was laughing inside thinking about what everyone had done to try and find out the name. Miss Patty had tried tapping her phone, Taylor had tried bribing her with a 3 discount off baby supplies, Kirk had offered his babysitting services (which she immediately refused). Gypsy had tried to threaten her by refusing her service and the rest of the town had just been…well the town. There had been many threats (on both parts might I add) and many proposed bribes, but Lorelai had not caved.
"ah, well I try sugar!" she said smiling and laughing. "well, I have to go. Got some polishing to do." Babette added while holding the polish up that was in her hand.
"yep! I have coffee to get! See you later Babette!" she said as she turned around and continued on her way.
Lorelai had then gone into Weston's and gotten some coffee and a chocolate donut. She sat down at one of the little tables to enjoy her food and coffee. She started to think what it would be like in a week or two. She would have a new baby; A new life to care for besides her own.
She placed her hand on her belly and rubbed it as she sipped her coffee. She smiled when she felt Jake kick. She really wished that Luke was there to feel it. She felt guilty for not telling him but how was she supposes to? She didn't know where he was and she had no way of getting that information. She then pushed that thought to the back of her head when she felt Jake kick again.
It was so astonishing how connected she felt towards the growing child inside. She never remembered feeling this way when she was pregnant with Rory. She smiled at the thought of getting a boy this time. She had had months for that realization to sink in but it wouldn't truly sink in until she was holding her tiny son in her arms.
Just then she felt a sharp pain in her side.
"Ow!" she exclaimed. It wasn't loud enough for the people around her to notice. She just passes it off as a cramp. She knew that babies were born a week or two early all the time but not her. Rory had been born a day late, so maybe this was just some stupid cramp trying to ruin her morning.
She walked over to the counter to pay and then walked out of Weston's carrying the cup of coffee she had not finished. She decided to head to the inn to get started early on her work.
When she got there she immediately walked to the kitchen to talk to Sookie. Sookie was always the one to cheer her up in the morning and always made it so Lorelai's day started out good.
"Hey sook!" she said as she entered the kitchen. It looked as if Sookie was just walking around making sure everyone was doing there job and doing it correctly.
"Hey! What ya up to?" she asked. "Put that in the oven! But only for 23.5 minutes!" she said giving directions to one of her workers.
"Nothing. I just went to Weston's to get my coffee and donut today." She Said picking up an apple and taking a bite from it.
"You know coffee is not good for the," she started.
"Yes I know it is not good for Ja…the baby!" she said almost slipping. She hadn't even told Sookie what the name was going to be. She wanted it to be a surprise.
"And your reasoning is?" she asked.
"Well, see the coffee makes me happy which makes the baby happy, which gives him a lower chance of depression as a teenager." She said as if it was that obvious.
"Well of course! That makes perfect sense!" Sookie said sarcastically.
"Why yes, it..OW!" she yelled grabbing her stomach. The same pain that she had gotten earlier at Weston's was back only this time it was worse; a lot worse!
"Lorelai what is it?" Sookie said rushing over to her.
"Oh, my god! I don't remember it hurting this much!" Lorelai said knowing she was getting contractions.
"What? Are you going into labor?" she asked urgently.
Lorelai was in too much pain to answer. She leaned on the island in the middle of the kitchen for support. She was still clutching her abdomen as she winced from the pain.
"Lorelai! Are you having a contraction?" Sookie asked knowing what it must have felt like only have given birth 5 months previously.
Lorelai nodded her head violently trying to keep back tears that were starting to form.
"Sookie…Hospital…" was all she could say.
"OK!" Sookie said planning to bring Lorelai to the hospital. She knew that Lorelai kept a bag for the hospital in her jeep just incase something like this happened. She instructed the cooking crew to help Lorelai out to Sookie's car while Sookie herself rushed out to get the bag and then inform Michele where they were going.
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Once in the car, Lorelai could feel the contraction ending. She sighed out and wiped the tears from her face.
"You ok?" Sookie asked as she saw her friend relax and lean back in the seat.
"yah, damn contractions! They hurt like hell!" she said closing her eyes.
"yeah. So I take it they have stopped momentarily?" Sookie asked as she started to pull out of the driveway of the dragonfly.
"for now." Lorelai responded while rubbing he belly. She knew that the next one would come, it was inevitable, but it was too soon when it did come.
"Oh! Not another one!" she said again wincing in pain.
"it's ok honey, it's ok." Sookie said trying to comfort her friend. She was holding Lorelai's hand now, and Lorelai was squeezing it.
"Luke!" Lorelai moaned. Sookie didn't know how to respond to this. She knew at that point that all Lorelai wanted now was her best friend, her lover, her Luke. But there was no way for that wish to come true. Luke was not there and he wouldn't be at all through the birth.
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After 25 minutes of driving, Sookie pulled into the hospital parking lot. She quickly jumped out of the car and ran over to the passenger side of the vehicle to help Lorelai out.
5 minutes later, they had made it into the hospital, Lorelai had filled out some papers, Rory had been contacted, and Lorelai was now changing into a little hospital gown.
Sookie was waiting in Lorelai's room while Lorelai changed in the bathroom when Rory came rushing into the room.
"MOM?" she yelled.
"Rory, your mom is changing in the bathroom." Sookie informed her.
"What? Ok, is she alright?" she asked not used to the whole hospital scene.
"She is fine; she has just been having contractions over the past half an hour at least. But she is fine" Sookie said seeing how much Rory was worried for her mother.
"Hey, what's going on out here?" Lorelai asked coming out of the bathroom with the gown on and obviously not having a contraction.
"Hey mom!" Rory said as she rushed over to give her mom a quick hug. Lorelai then walked over to the bed that was in the room and situated herself under the sheets.
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"you are almost fully dilated now Ms. Gilmore." The nurse said throwing the latex glove into the trash. "The doctor will be in within the next few minutes." The nurse said and then she walked out the door.
Sookie was the one at the head of the bed with Lorelai right now. Sookie would be the one helping her with the birth. Rory, being Rory, had refused to be in the room to see her little brother 'come around the mountain' so she was waiting in the waiting room.
"So, you are going to be a mommy again!" Sookie said enthusiastically.
"Oh Yay! Real fun! See it is the getting the kid out that is the hardest pa…OW! Oh, god! Where is that damn doctor?" she said feeling that the baby wanted to be born now, not wait a few minutes.
As if on queue, the doctor entered the room followed by and entourage of nurses.
"So, I see that you are fully dilated now." the doctor said as he put on latex gloves and sat down on the stool at the end of the bed.
"God just get it out!" she yelled as the pain ran throughout her lower body.
"Now I am going to count to ten. You push for that time and then breathe out." The doctor said.
"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. And breathe out." He said as she blew out. "And one, two, three…" he repeated as she cursed and screamed.
As soon as the head was visible the doctor said "about two more pushes and you will have yourself a new little baby."
Lorelai was in so much pain that all she wanted was to give up, go to sleep wake up and have it all just be a dream. But she couldn't.
"Come on Lorelai, just two more pushes! And you can see the head now!" Sookie said trying to encourage Lorelai.
Two pushes later there was squealing heard from both a baby, and Sookie. Lorelai was crying. The reasoning being that the pain had subsided, and that she was so happy to finally have her little boy.
"And it's a boy!" the doctor said placing the little boy on Lorelai and handing her the scissors. "Would you like to cut the cord?" he asked.
Lorelai just nodded and then she cut the cord right above the yellow clip they had clipped on the umbilical cord.
They then took Lorelai's little boy across the room so they could weigh him, measure him, and give him the necessary vaccinations. One of the nurses came up to Lorelai to ask the name.
"And what is his name?" she asked.
"Jacob William Danes" she said. She had had thought of the name one of the nights of her restless nights thinking about Luke and his parents and what would have been different if they were alive. The last name was solely out of love for Luke. She also wanted her son to grow up with some connection to his father that Rory never had. Of course Christopher was some how different from Luke; she had never loved Christopher, but she had spent so much time trying to convince herself that she did. With Luke it was the other way around; she had now spent the last 8 months trying to convince herself that she didn't love Luke. It was all a lie though.
"OH! That is so cute!" Sookie exclaimed. Sookie knew why Lorelai had chosen the middle name and the last but the first was a mystery. Maybe it was to mask to real meaning behind the name; to hide what Lorelai was really feeling.
"Yah, but we are going to call him Jake or Jakey. it is more cute and baby material. What do you think?" Lorelai asked her friend.
"I think it is even cuter!" Sookie said in a more serious tone.
Lorelai remembered that moment. She remembered having to put on a fake smile for Sookie. At that moment in time she had felt as if Luke should have been there telling her that no son of his would be called Jakey! But he wasn't. Lorelai only had Sookie to comment on how cute the name was and how cute Jake was. She didn't have her Luke though.
"MOM! We're home!" Rory yelled as she entered the house.
"oh! My two favorite children in the world!" Lorelai exclaimed as she got up and walked over to Rory and Jake.
"Oh, and where would your least favorite children be?" Rory asked.
"Oh, well I keep them stored somewhere so when I get bored of you I can just trade you in!" she said jokingly.
"Ah! well don't we feel loved!" Rory said sarcastically as she picked up her little brother.
"Hand him over! I need to see how much he has grown!" Lorelai said reaching out her arms.
"for one thing, I don't think he has grown much in the last 2 hours, and two, you are never holding your child again!"
"But why!" Lorelai asked with a puzzled look on her face.
"You just threatened to store us in a warehouse when you got bored of us!" Rory said.
"And you took me seriously? God, when would I have had time in my life to give birth to more than you two when I so busy perfecting you!" she said pointing at Rory.
"oh, my outcome had nothing to do with you 'perfecting' me! It was pure genetics!" Rory said.
"OH! Now you admit you're related to me!" Lorelai said triumphantly knowing she had won. She then took the opportunity to grab her son from the arms of Rory.
"Ha! I win!" Lorelai said sticking her tongue out at Rory. "Did your meany big sister keep you from your mommy?" Lorelai asked Jake as he yawned.
"Oh, I have to say I think someone needs a nap!" Lorelai said holding Jake to her chest so he could snuggle in.
"Oh, well Jakey needs a nap too mom." Rory said smiling at her mom.
"Funny! Very funny. I will deal with you in a minute!" she said pointing her finger at Rory and then walking up the stairs to her room.
When she got up to her room, she changed Jake's diaper, changed his clothes, and then placed him in his crib.
When Lorelai walked back down the stairs she found Rory in the kitchen looking at something.
"Hey, what ya got there?" she asked as she made her way into the kitchen after tripping twice on the clutter all over the floor. God I need to clean up! Lorelai thought to herself.
"Oh, it's just a photo album that was here when I came in. were you looking at it?" Rory asked.
"Ah, yah. I got bored after Sookie stopped by and I just pulled it out." She responded rubbing her forehead.
She saw unorganized pictures staring at her. She didn't even remember having half of them taken, but they were there.
"Mom, when was this taken?" Rory asked pointing to a picture of a little girl, obviously Rory, about the age of 5 or 6 being pushed on a swing by a younger and happier Lorelai. it seemed to be early may in the picture. Rory had her hair down and blowing in the wind. She was wearing a plain pink t-shirt and shorts that seemed to be pants with the legs cut off. Lorelai was wearing the same type of jeans, but had a tan tank top on. They both looked so happy. They had grown apart since then. Not much, but they didn't tell each other everything any more. Lorelai's true feeling towards Luke for example.
"Ah, that was at the inn when you were about 5. You were such a happy kid." Lorelai added sitting down in the chair next to Rory.
The next few pages were filled with younger Rory and Lorelais. Always happy, always together.
When they got to a picture of Lorelai and Luke, Rory stopped turning the pages. It was a picture of Luke and Lorelai on some holiday. Lorelai remembered that holiday. It was Christmas. It had always seemed like a different holiday after that Christmas. she didn't know why until she took the picture out and flipped it over. It read:
Christmas, 1996
She then realized that that was the year she had met Luke; The first Christmas with Luke somewhere in her life. She flipped the picture over again to see the two happiest people on earth.
In the picture Lorelai had her hair down in loose, bouncing curls. She was wearing a nice red turtleneck shirt, and a black skirt that was 6 inches from her knee. Luke was typical Luke with a blue flannel on and some jeans. He did look as if he has shaved though. The picture showed Lorelai and Luke on the porch. Lorelai was leaning on the railing, obviously laughing hysterically at a joke or something. Luke just had a smile on. The smile. It was the smile that only Lorelai could make Luke show. Rather than smiling at what the other person had just said, he was smiling at how happy Lorelai had been at that moment and how he had been the cause.
Lorelai knew all of this because at the last Christmas that she and Luke spent together, the only Christmas, was the one where they had shared tales of past holidays together. That was one of the ones that had come up. She smiled as she remembered that. It had been a happy time. At that moment in the past she had wanted to feel that happiness always. If only she had gotten what she wanted.
"Next!" Lorelai said instructing Rory to change to the next page.
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There you go! i believe that is my longest chapter yet. there is only a few more left until the end! No! It should never end! but alas, it does. not yet though!
Review! Review! Review! please! after what i went through to get this chapter up so quickly, i really need something happy in my life. and if you haven't noticed, reviews count as big clumps of happiness in my world. i know, i am strange! but it is fun! and i get many funny looks from people who don't know me! like at the mall the other day! i was in a store christmas shopping and i was jumping up and down like a crazy lunatic. i believe the words "escapey" and "asylum" were mentioned a couple times. oh well. so remember to review! Review! Review!