3. Christmas
Christmas was here. And I had no one to spend it with. Nobody. I didn't put up decorations, because who would see them? I didn't go Christmas shopping, because I didn't have anyone to buy things for. As I walked around my apartment, No, I thought. Her apartment. Catherine Whitman's apartment. My apartment was back in New York. As I walked around her apartment, with a glass of wine in my hand, I noticed the picture on the mantle. It was one of the few I had from my old life.
I took it down, and studied it. It was taken at the big Christmas ball the NYPD and the DA's office always held. I was in it, as was Cragen and Huang, and Munch and Fin, and Elliot and Olivia. We were all pretty smashed, and having the time of our lives. The holidays were happy that year. We were all so happy, dancing and laughing and drinking.
Elliot was in the center, his right arm around Olivia, the other around me. Munch and Fin stood off to the right, and Cragen and Huang stood off to the left. We all were smiling and laughing. It's hard to believe that, six months later, I was in the Program.
Christmas was going to be so dull this year, not having anyone to spend it with. I missed them so much, all of them. I passed by the window, and caught my reflection. A woman I did not know, with black hair, and green eyes stared back at me. I raised the wine glass to the reflection.
"Merry Christmas, Alex," I said, and downed the glass.
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