A/N: Reviews are much appreciated, keep the encouragement coming and I'll work on my end of the bargain. By the way, stuff starts to get a little... dark... in spots, don't shoot me.

Teyla shifted uncomfortably in her bed. It was early in the mourning, and she hadn't slept at all. She hadn't slept since he died. It hurt to much, all she could dream about was him dying.

She willed herself to get up and go the her bathroom. Once there, she opened her sparring pack. She withdrew the small canister of pills. They weren't sleeping pills, they were stimulants. She needed to be strong.

No one knew, no one would know about her use of the stimulants. If she was ever discovered, she would be outcast from her people. She downed two of the pills with a small cup of water. This allowed her to get through her day.

She tied her hair back loosely in a ponytail, then dressed in her full uniform. She felt the energy swirl into her body as the pills took effect. All traces of fatigue disappeared before she set foot outside her room.

She walked down the hall at her usual brisk pace. The stimulants gave her focus. They gave her enough of a boost to concentrate. She began her day with no one the wiser about what she did.

XXX

Carson Beckett sat in his office. He was supposed to be typing up a report on the other day's patients. Two marines were still in the infirmary with some nasty injuries.

He was lucky no one had died. He still remembered desperately trying to keep John Sheppard alive. He was also trying to track down why he'd lost two canisters of stimulants. He'd checked the reports, but he couldn't figure out why anyone would steal them.

He rubbed his forehead just as Elizabeth walked in. She was carrying a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and another in the other. She offered him the second cup.

"Looks like you could use it." She said with a small smile.

"Aye, that I could." Carson replied, sipping from the hot coffee. "I was just tryin' to finish my reports."

Elizabeth glanced at the computer screen. "Doesn't look like you're doing too well."
"I'm just findin' it hard. This is the part of the report where I have to talk about how Colonel Sheppard died."
Elizabeth's expression hardened slightly. "I couldn't even begin to offer you suggestions."

"I don't think we've even begun to see the ramifications of his death yet. On top of all this, I'm missing two canisters of stimulants."

"Really?" Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. "That's it?"

"Aye, it doesn't make any bloody sense. I don't even know who would do such a thing."

"Should I have Sergeant Bates look into it?"

"I don't think it can hurt. I'm still thinkin' it's just a case of someone on the Daedalus not being careful enough."

"You don't think it was stolen?"
"I don't know a person in the city I would suspect for such a theft. Or what they'd do with it."

"I'll have Bates look into it." She placed a hand on his shoulder. "It wasn't your fault."

Deep down inside, Carson knew it wasn't his fault, but he felt like he should've been able to do something. He felt like he should've been able to save John Sheppard.