Hi its just Callie here, Erin's of straightening her hair or something…

Oh my God we are so sorry we have not updated sooner, please don't kill us! It's just that we've had exams and everything.

BUT you can have the good news there are 22 and a half chapters written so there's one thing.

Alright consider this an early Christmas present after all its only 10 days away…

Disclaimer: We own nobody that you recognise yada, yada, yada. (You should be used to this by now)

After the camp had packed up the fellowship began to travel towards their destination- Moria. Gimli had been boring them all the way with sagas about his ancestry.

"…and my cousin Balin is Lord of Moria and shall give us a royal welcome," Gimli was saying. His stories were literally putting everyone to sleep. Nobody wanted to here how Gruluc had lost his axe or how Kilogk had built an underground tomb which was still standing or whatever there names were it was of no consequence to anyone.

Vee was sound asleep in Legolas' arms. Laura was trying not to sleep- well, trying to avoid touching Gandalf. Saz was drifting off but for a whole different reason. Boromir was "treating" her to his own sagas but he took it personally when Saz's eyes began to droop.

"WAKE UP!" he yelled for the seventh time, waking the rest of the sleeping fellowship.

"I'm awake," said Saz with her eyes closed. Boromir shook her shoulders hard.

"Boromir," She said dangerously "I am sleep deprived and angry. Do not push me," He shook her shoulders yet again.

"Right that is IT!" Saz yelled dismounting "Legolas, these horses ARE elvish trained right?"

Legolas tried to nod without jiggling Vee's head.

"Good," Saz said grimly "Everybody hold on…except you Boromir you don't need to."

"Ok," Boromir said "Look no hands."

Saz found her moment. He let out a long whistle and the horses began to gallop off. Boromir slipped but his foot got caught in the horse's stirrup and his head was bouncing along hitting rocks. "Helllp!" he yelled as his horse galloped away in the opposite direction.

Saz stood watching the mayhem she had created. Gimli was teetering precariously on the side of his horse; it appeared Gandalf has his under control but Laura was as white as a sheet; the Hobbits were still going round in circles ("Uhh Merry, I feel dizzy," Pippin commented) and Vee was still sound asleep in Legolas' arms.

After about five minutes the fellowship had there horses under control and each and every one of them was glaring at Saz. However Legolas looked like something was troubling him.

"Vee,"

"Yes Legolas," she replied as she had woken up just five minutes before.

"What is a skater boy?"

"Oh God,"

"SAZ!" Gandalf's voice boomed

"Yes," she whimpered trying to smile sweetly but Gandalf was having none of it.

"Saz, you could have killed Boromir. What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking he was getting really annoying," She said "And it just might save the orcs a job," she mumbled under her breath.

"Pardon?" Gandalf snapped

"Nothing."

"Gandalf," Aragorn yelled "I've got Boromir," All the fellowship turned to see Aragorn leading over Boromir and his horse. They all rushed over to see what help they could give him, but Aragorn waved them away.

"Don't crowd him," he muttered "Boromir can you hear me?"

"Of course I can mother, is it time for breakfast already?" The fellowship turned to look at each other, each with the same bemused looks on their faces except Aragorn who looked scandalized.

"Aragorn," Laura said "Is there something you're not telling us? I mean first lorealf and now this…" she trailed off after she saw the murderous looked on Aragorn's face.

"Right we must get back on our trail," Gandalf said "Now Saz you will ride with…" He watched as the whole camp took steps backwards and waved their hands and mouthed "No way" at him or "Are you out of your mind" However the only one not protesting was Pippin who unfortunately for him was studying a rather large mushroom. "Pippin."

"It wasn't me," Pippin blurted out "I didn't do anything."

"I know that, but you're are going to be riding with Saz,"

"So you didn't know it was me that took Frodo's socks and…" he trailed off.

"That was YOU," Frodo yelled

"No…whatever gave you that idea," Pippin replied.

"Let's get moving," Aragorn decided. Everyone scrambled to there horse and remounted. Boromir was put on Merry's horse with some difficulty "But Mother am I going on a journey? Are you coming with me?" Aragorn ignored him and walked over to his horse as Boromir whimpered or rather screamed "MOTHER," after him.

"Let's go," Gandalf said and everyone set off towards Moria with screams of "MOTHER," punctuating the silence.

There you go dear readers, that is chapter 11 of "Oh, tiarariffic: Middle earth is Doomed." Stay tuned for the next instalment which has possible one of the best lines in the whole thing in it…but I can't tell you what it is so you'll just have to read it.

Ok people, PLEASE read and REVIEW. Thank you. Callie.

Over and Out.