Friends of Fire 7

Jocelyn stayed quiet, wondering what was going through her lover's mind. William had kept silent since the confession and it troubled her. At some point, after long minutes had passed, she wondered if he was still there.

"William?" she spoke with a quivering voice.

"Why?" His voice was barely a whisper but it demanded an explanation.

The knight was unable to swallow the huge lump in his throat. He raised a hand to his chest, hoping to ease the pressure in his lungs and allow him to breathe. No matter what, he couldn't digest the news.

"I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, William. Rest assured that I can explain," said Jocelyn, turning around to face him. The tears had gone from her eyes but left reddened cheeks behind. She took a deep breath but was cut off by William.

"How could you have done this to me?"

"I did this for the both of us. I never thought that it would lead us to a fight. When I decided to lie about my pregnancy, I assumed that it would bring us back to each other. For the last few weeks, things for us have been really bad, my love."

"When?" William gasped in shock. "Everything as far as I am concerned has been going great."

Despite the intensity of the moment, Jocelyn let out a chuckle. Aiming to be sarcastic, the action sent a jolt of anger through William.

"You don't care about anything," he cried through gritted teeth. "You never did, Jocelyn. All you care about is yourself. How could you have lied to me? The man you supposedly love?"

"I do love you!" she cried, springing forward. William stepped back quickly and glared at her.

"Can't you see that I have only lied to keep us together? Ever since Kate had fallen ill, your mind has been nowhere else but on her. I have left my home to travel miles with you, William. I've slept on the ground, walked in the rain, and traveled insane hours in the night, all of it for you. I never complained about my situation because I knew it made you happy!"

"Made me happy?" he gasped. "I always had you in my mind, Jocelyn. I constantly argued with my friends to take the easiest roads for you, and rest more than we should just to make sure you were as comfortable as you could possibly be."

Shaking her head slowly, she let out an inaudible sigh. "It was not enough, my love."

"Oh God!" he shouted into the night. "What more could you possibly ask of me?"

William was still panting, waiting for her to answer. She had lowered her head to the ground and stayed quiet. He asked her again with a softer tone of voice but still she did not speak. Silence reigned the air.

"Jocelyn?"

"Let's make a child."

William blinked, and realized the conversation had taken a turn. "What?"

The raven beauty looked at him and beamed. Her eyes held sparkles that he found inappropriate for their current state.

"I ask for forgiveness, my love! I am so sorry that I have hurt you, for it was not my intention. I promise that I will be the perfect lady to you. I admit that I have been jealous but after much thought, I came to realize… we are meant to be together. You try so hard to keep me happy."

"Have you gone mad?"

"Let's make a child, William," she grabbed his arm, her eyes boring into his. "Give me a child and we shall raise it together. You and I. Nothing can separate us."

Taking a deep breath, William took a step back and gently pushed her hands from his arms. They fell to her side and her smile began to fade.

"I need time, Jocelyn."

"Kate is sick, William. You cannot help her," she retorted softly as if speaking to a child.

"Don't bring her into this conversation," he warned. "She is getting better!"

"No, she isn't. No one with medical knowledge or even a witch for that matter can help her. She is lost, William, and her soul probably left this earth a long time ago. Listen to yourself, dwelling over a person that cannot be saved. I am here for you, she is not. Can you not see that?"

"You really are mad! She is alive and breathing in that house, Jocelyn," he barked, his finger waving at her in anger. "Quit lying to yourself, no good ever comes of it."

"Why do you reserve so much space in your thoughts and heart to her?"

"She is my friend!"

"I am your lover!"

"You lied to me, does this not bother you? You made a fool of me just to have it your way! How can this be called love? Tell me."

"I have stayed by your side to this day. No matter what happened, I have been here to support you through the hardest times."

"Need I remind you that you just ran away, Jocelyn! You humiliated me in front of my friends and our hosts, without forgetting tonight when I learned I was the father of a child that never existed!"

"We could make it exist."

"No, we can't!"

"Yes, my love, we can. I understand that you are angry with me, but I believe in time the anger will fade and your love will shine once again. You will learn to forgive me like I have forgiven you."

"I haven't done anything to be forgiven for."

"What if I was to say that Kate was to wake up tonight?"

"What?"

"If she is alive and well just like you hope she is. Will you forget her and come back to me?"

William looked away, replaying her question in his head. In the meantime, the sun had set and the coldness of night invaded the clearing. Neither of them had an appropriate piece of clothing to keep them warm.

Jocelyn frowned. "You are in love with me but your thoughts are with this other woman. A woman who is nothing like me and could possibly be mistaken for a man. She is not the lady you would want to spend the rest of your life with. I am, William."

"No, you are not," he spoke softly, his eyes locking with hers. "Not only are my thoughts with Kate but so is my heart. Her falling ill made me realize she means so much more to me than I cared to admit. Losing her would mean losing a part of me. I love her, Jocelyn."

She snapped her mouth shut and stared at him. She tilted her head to the side, wondering if she had heard him correctly. "What?"

"You were right. I do need to be forgiven, for it was not my intention to fall in love with another woman. I do not want you to believe that I have never loved you. You really are a wonderful woman, Jocelyn-"

"You disgust me!" she screamed.

"Jocelyn…"

"You should be ashamed of yourself, William. Don't you have a heart?"

"I beg your pardon? All of this has started because of you, not I. You lied to me about your pregnancy. You broke my heart."

"You said it yourself, William. Your heart has never followed us into these woods. It stayed in that house, with Kate. The only heart that has been broken tonight is mine."

"I'm sorry, Jocelyn, I really am. I could no longer keep it to myself and-"

"I will never forgive you, William. Now I request that you bring me back to that awful house and first thing tomorrow I shall leave."

"You cannot be serious. Leave alone? You don't even know where we are!"

"I am not staying here with you. Let's go."

Shocked, William stared as she mounted her horse. Keeping her head high and avoiding his gaze, she waited until he did the same. Reluctantly, William led the way back to the house in silence. Admitting his love for another woman had been by far the hardest thing he had ever done. He did not feel at peace. On the contrary. He felt as if he had just started a war.

Friends of Fire 8 in work Thank you for your patience everyone xxx