Chapter 4. Annoying Interlude
Vaaltos, Master of the Black Wind, really knew how to travel in style. He'd called up a short black tornado that he somehow managed to stand on top of like a pedestal, and it was moving at a rapid clip across the desert. He was still carrying Zeld by the ropes, and Zeld was still being as annoying as possible.
"Where are we?" Zeld asked. "Where are you taking me? What do you want with me? How come I've never heard of you?"
"We're in a desert east of Hyrule," Vaaltos answered. "You'll find out where I'm taking you soon enough. I'll tell you what I want with you eventually. And you've never heard of me because I'm…not from around here."
"Wow, you answered all my questions kinda. I should start asking tougher ones."
"I wish you wouldn't."
"Now I have to. Why is the sky blue? How does plumbing work? How old are you? How exactly do they make steel? Do you ever get vertigo? What color is aubergine? How come they have so many names for beige? Why am I tied up? Why is that vein on your forehead sticking out like that? Do you always grind your teeth so hard? What kind of name is Vaaltos anyway?"
"Will you shut up!"
"Not until you answer all of my questions."
"But I can't even remember all of them!" Vaaltos sounded desperate.
"Don't care, want answers."
"That's it!" Vaaltos thrust Zeld out over the empty air beyond the black tornado. "Shut up or I drop you."
Zeld gulped at the sight of the earth so far below him, but remained confident. "You won't drop me," he said. "You need me for something. I don't know what because you won't tell me, but something."
"You want to know why I've captured you?" Vaaltos laughed. "I thought you were supposed to be smart."
"I'm not following."
"Isn't it obvious?" Vaaltos turned Zeld toward him and grinned wickedly. "I want the Triforce of Wisdom."
"Oh that. I don't have it."
"What!"
zzz
The Sheikah returned in only fifteen minutes with the mushroom, but it was more like fifteen years to Link. Every second she was helpless on that bed, Zeld was getting further and further away from her. She was sure of it, even though she wasn't sure why.
Finally though, the Sheikah was back in a flash of light and Mara took the mushroom off to her house to mix the potion.
"What's your name?" Link asked, wanting to do anything to make the wait go faster.
"Kobold," he answered.
"Well Kobold," Link smiled at the ceiling. "I owe you a lot."
"No you don't," he said. "I, unlike my misguided neighbor, believe that saving the world takes precedence over any debts."
"Meaning what, exactly."
"Meaning I neither want, nor will accept, your money."
"I didn't say anything about money."
"But you said-"
"I owe you, it doesn't have to be money. If you ever need help, just remember me."
Kobold smiled. "It's very strange, thinking of you as a hero."
"Why, because I'm a girl?"
"No," he sat down on the bed beside her. "Because you're the same age as my little sister. I watched her grow up, and now I see you setting off to save the world."
"It's not the world," Link said. "Just the prince."
Kobold looked down at her. "You don't know, do you?"
"Know what?"
zzz
"What do you mean you don't have it?" Vaaltos roared.
"Exactly what I said." Zeld shrugged as best he could. "The Triforce of Wisdom will only be passed down to me when my wisdom exceeds that of the current holder."
"Who is?"
"Yeah," Zeld snorted, "like I'm going to tell you."
Vaaltos shook him roughly. "You'll tell me, or I'll tear the information from you."
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," Zeld said matter-of-factly.
"Oh no?"
"Nope," Zeld shook his head. "I'd hold me for ransom."
Vaaltos blinked. "You would."
"Yep."
"Why are you suggesting that?"
"Several reasons actually. First, because it's a much better idea. Second, because I don't want to get hurt or killed. And third, because I figure the longer you hold me unharmed, the better chance I've got of being rescued."
"Rescued?" Vaaltos laughed. "You won't be rescued, not from where I'm taking you."
zzz
"Ow!"
"Hold still."
"I'm trying, but you keep- Ow!"
"I said hold still!"
Muttering to herself, Link held as still as she could, but it was hard to hold still and wheedle information out of someone at the same time. "Come on, tell me," she said to Kobold. "What don't I know?"
"Mara says not to excite you."
"No I didn't."
"You stay out of this."
"Come on, please?"
"After you're better."
"But-"
"Hold still!"
"Ow!" Mara had used the forest mushroom to make a salve as well as a potion. Link had already drunk the potion, and it had cured all her minor hurts as well as relieving most of the pain in her back, but Mara insisted that the salve would go straight to the pain and should be applied immediately.
Kobold, after insinuating that whatever it was Link didn't know was something she definitely should know, had flatly refused to tell her. This wouldn't be so annoying, except that he seemed to enjoy tormenting her.
"You know it already, or you should if you've heard any of the stories about our country, so I'm not going to tell you."
"I swear, as soon as I can get off this bed-"
"What are you going to do?" Kobold asked, grinning. "Kill me?"
"I might."
"You wouldn't, you're a hero."
"Well, maybe not kill you. But I'll beat you to within an inch of your life."
"I'll hold him down for you," Mara offered.
"Hey, thanks."
"No prob." Mara finally took her hands off Link's back and wiped them on her skirt. "That should do it."
"Yes!" Link jumped off the bed and stretched. There was no pain, not even any stiffness. "Ha ha! Perfect! I'm out of here!"
She pulled on her boots and buckled her belt back on, then grabbed her pack and turned to Kobold. "I'll spare you," she said loftily, "if you'll at least tell me which way the whirlwind went."
"I'll show you, come on."
He led her outside and pointed toward the mountains beyond the city, the light glinting off his ring. "Straight across," he said. "Away from the setting sun."
"Across the mountains?"
"Uh-huh, which means you'll probably be needing her." He jerked his thumb over his shoulder, indicating-
"17th!" Link exclaimed. She ran over and hugged the mare's neck. "Where did you find her?"
"Outside the Kokiri Forest," he said. "She had your family's crest on her saddle so I naturally assumed she was yours. And apparently I was right."
"You were absolutely right!" Link exclaimed, still squeezing 17th's neck. "You didn't happen to find a bow, some arrows, and a sword there, did you?"
"No, I didn't find anything like that."
Link sighed. "I guess I'll need to arm myself before I go then. Do you know of any weapon shops nearby?"
"There's a place in town where you can get a bow and arrows, but if you really intend to leave Hyrule's boundaries and save the prince, you're going to need more than just a sword…"
zzz
"I had no idea there was a huge desert east of Hyrule. We are east of Hyrule aren't we? That looks like Death Mountain back there."
"Yes, if you must know-"
"I must."
"Shut up. We are east of Hyrule, and that is Death Mountain. You didn't know there was a desert here because you Hylians don't think that there is anything beyond your precious country."
"So you're saying there is?"
Vaaltos smiled mysteriously. "There are whole worlds…"
zzzzz
AN: Er, sorry. I didn't realize this was such a short chaper when I wrote it. I'll post the next one in the next couple days to make up for it.