Title: Love Apart

Disclaimer: Slash. Angst. Violence.

POV: Nick

Chapter Sixteen: Knowing Peace

The minute I hear them yell that the perp is dead I make my move. I rush toward the building, leaving Danny with Horatio. I don't care about my safety. I don't care about evidence or protocol. I have to find Speed. He's alive. He has to be.

I hear Horatio yelling for back up while also yelling at SWAT to let me go. Fuck SWAT. Fuck the local police. Hell, the FBI can go home now. He needs them? I need Speed. He's here. That's what they say.

I run pass the SWAT and the deceased. I can deal with them all later. It isn't until I reach the dining room that I stop. Horatio and Danny come up behind me. They followed me? Horatio broke protocol? A boss that doesn't follow the rules? No wonder Speed cares for him so much.

"Nick, calm down," Horatio says. "Danny and I will check the upstairs. You see what you can find down here."

I nod in agreement. I don't think I can speak. I just don't have it in me. They disappear up a set of stairs. A peek out a window shows the SWAT standing by while the agents check out the exterior of the house.

I make a quick sweep of the living room, dining room, and kitchen. Nothing. Same goes for the laundry room and office. Danny and Horatio haven't found him. They would have yelled down to let me know. I feel the panic growing inside. That's when I see the door.

A basement. The perfect place to keep a hostage. Why hadn't I thought of that before? My hand is on the knob and opening the door before I even remember moving. I flick the switch at the top of the stairs. Light washes away the dark. A crumbled heap at the bottom of the stairs sends my heart racing.

I stumble down the stairs. Half way down I see the various pools of blood. The panic rises. I make it to the bottom to the crumbled heap. To Speed.

I touch him. He feels so cold. "No," I plead. "Don't be dead." I feel for a pulse. It's there. Faint, but there.

"I found him," I yell.

I hear footsteps upstairs as people move about. Did any of them hear?

"You found Speed?" I hear Danny ask. "Is he okay?"

"No, we need to get him to the ambulance out front. He's barely hanging in."

Horatio leaves Danny at the top of the stairs to get the ME's. Danny just stood there. I smiled through my tears.

"We finally found him."

"I'm tired of waiting here. When the hell is the doctor going to update us?" I ask.

We've been in the waiting room for hours. The sun had set roughly a half-hour ago and there was still no word on Speed. Danny sat quietly this entire time. He looks haunted. His eyes seem slightly empty. Horatio has spent most of the time filling out various forms. But I can see that the wait is getting to him. I don't think Danny even notices.

Finally the doctor makes his way over to us. "I'm sorry for the long wait. We had a few complications but things are fine now."

Horatio places a hand on my shoulder before I can say anything. "How is he, doctor?"

"He had a few broken ribs and a hairline fracture in his collarbone. His shoulder was also dislocated. The bullet only caused damage to the muscle and tissue. He may need physical therapy to regain full use of the leg. Lastly, he received six stitches for a deep gash in his head."

I shake my head. "Is he going to be fine?"

The doctor smiles. "With a little TLC he'll be just fine." He glances at his watch. "He should be waking up right about now. You can have a little time with him but then he must sleep. He needs all the rest he can get."

The three of us followed behind the doctor. The hospital is oddly silent. It's eerie. We reach a door.

"Please, only one at a time."

Horatio looks at me and then at Danny. "Why don't you go first, Nick? You found him."

I steel my spine and enter the room. Speed is lying in a bed with wires and tubes hooked to him. I feel nervous. Why? I approach the bed. I take his hand in my. He opens his eyes. I smile at him.

"Hey, welcome back to the planet earth." I give his hand a gentle squeeze. "Guess what? You're safe. You're home now. No one will hurt you ever again."

He looks at me. Then whispers, "Go away. I don't want to see you. I don't want to see any of you."