Harry walked out of the office, not really trying to dodge bullets, but somehow getting away without a scratch. He walked out onto the grounds to find Ron and Hermione. He finally found them sitting next to the lake, Hermione with a book on her lap.

"Oh geese, Ron, not again!" Harry heard Hermione say exasperatedly. "Will you please stop it already! That's like fourteenth time you've farted in the past five minutes!"

"I told you 'Mione, I had pinto beans this morning!"

"Hi guys!" Harry walked out from behind the tree he had been hiding behind.

Ron and Hermione groaned.

"Guys," said Harry, sitting down next to them, "My scar has been hurting lately."

"So," said Ron, "my butt is hurting from farting so much."

"We need to find out what the evil chipmunks are up too!" said Hermione.

"I thought we killed them all!" said Ron.

"They've gone out to find every chipmunk they can to get back at us!" Harry shouted into Hermione's ear.

Hermione rubbed her ear. "Yes, that's it! We need to warn everyone in a very calm and orderly fashion!"

"Right," said Ron, standing up, "How did we figure that out so fast?"

"I have no friggin idea, we do it every year though." said Hermione.

Harry walked back up to the castle, Ron and Hermione behind him, flicking boogers in his hair and laughing.

As soon as they reached the castle, Harry ran into the Great Hall and started screaming at everyone.

"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! THE KILLER CHIPMUNKS ARE BACK!"

People started screaming and jumped up from their tables, knocking over the benches they sat on, even knocking over the huge tables. Some people started running on the tables laughing. McGonagall started throwing food at people and laughing, Professor Sprout started throwing plants at everyone, Hagrid, who had been revived by Madam Pomfrey, started shrieking and running for the door, trampling kids and tiny Professor Flitwick started laughing manically and somehow flipped over the high table. Dumbledore, however, pulled out his machine gun and started shooting at the ceiling.

Whatever he thought was going to happen, perhaps that everyone would fall silent, did not, and everyone started running faster at hearing gunshots.

"Ah crap, not another war..." He muttered to himself and then made his way back to his office.

Perhaps it was time to tell the ministry what was happening. He would go to them with no evidence whatsoever, being that they had none and hadn't even heard any word of the chipmunks.

A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed! Thanks go to: DeannaSmith

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-C&D