TITLE: A Past to Outdo

SUMMARY: Third in the Vengeance trilogy! Expect Harper angst, action and Beka also kicks her fair share of ass in this fic.

WARNINGS: Language of the colourful kind and violence, expect nothin' less ;)

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing from the Andromeda series, I'm just borrowing.

NOTES: It's been a while, I know! You really do need to read Vengeance and Break before you read this one (reach them via my profile). I honestly hadn't planned on writing one sequel, let alone two, but I couldn't leave it like that! So whether you want it or not, Harper's got even more angst in store.

CHAPTER ONE Echoes

"I could tell you stories if it would set your mind at rest

But those who face the truth, sweet child, will be thereafter blessed."

- Earth proverb

CY 143-234

Though his body ached and his mind was weary, there was strange calm about him. This had been a long time coming.

Every day the pain of knowing what he had done weighed upon his shoulders and the thought of that pain ever leaving never crossed his mind. After all those years the solution seemed so simple now. It wasn't drugs, it wasn't suicide, it wasn't pretending it didn't happen in the first place; it was simply walking into that building. Maybe the circumstances of his arrival weren't perfect, but at least he was finally doing it. Walking into that building would make everything right again.

After taking his last tainted breath, he began to walk to his long-sought redemption.

It was time to confess.

A FEW DAYS EARLIER

Harper collapsed onto his bed, knowing he'd only be able to get six hours of sleep until his next check-up with Trance. This was one of the many conditions of his continued stay on Andromeda. It was the eighth day after the survivors from Autriva tried to take over Andromeda, and Harper's relapse had been discovered. There was a lot to talk about after that.

It had been a long day. They'd all been pretty long lately, but this one was the worst yet. It all started out just as every other day since Andromeda was attacked by the Autriva survivors; not well. It was in the early hours was when the withdrawal hit hardest. The treatment Trance created helped a lot, but there was nothing that could completely quell the screaming need inside of him. The only sanctuary from it was in his sleep, and even then, it was no better, just a different kind of suffering.

It always seemed to rain in Harper's nightmares. Whatever past atrocity he was regressing to, whatever demons were surfacing in his sleep, the rain was always there, constantly beating down as a painful reminder of his past. It was also the only thing in his dreams that was clear. Much like his previous encounter with the All Systems' database, the images ran into one another, a blur of chaos, destruction and the dead. But unlike the database, these nightmares cut him deeply - because all he saw were his own memories. Every possible bad experience all craving attention at the same time. It was like a guided tour of all that sucked about his life.

'And here on your left you can see the Magog larvae attached to Harper's insides, this is a good photo-opportunity folks. Moving on, here we have the time Harper murdered a man on Carna, when he was a deadbeat junkie. Gather round for a closer look everybody! This is the spot where Harper framed Lane Farrow, his dealer, for the murder he committed.'

'And we're walking, we're walking...and we're stopping. A few years later, here we have the return of Ms. Farrow, who claimed her revenge on Harper by telling him that when he killed the man on Carna, he created a fatherless son! Wrought with guilt, our Seamus attempted to commit suicide, but it didn't end there folks, oh no! Harper triggered a program embedded in Andromeda's AI that sent her on a killing spree!'

'Look at all those charred corpses everyone, that's what drove Harper insane when he woke up from his coma and finally stopped Rommie's path of destruction. That's right folks, during the investigation into the killing spree some weeks later, Harper went slowly insane and relapsed into the drug world, causing yet more chaos, lying to his friends, beating up dealers and almost dying from an overdose.'

'And that brings us to the close of our exciting tour of Harper's psyche. Next showing will be tomorrow night. Thank-you for listening, souvenirs will be available in the gift shop.'

Harper woke with a shout. He was freezing cold, but covered in sweat, the sheets in dishevelled around him. He gasped for breath, the images from his restless sleep still fresh in his mind. Finally he calmed when he realised he was on Andromeda, in his quarters. The screams from his sleep turned into the steady beep of his alarm. It was just another day. Just another nightmare.

End of chapter one

Next chapter: Second Chance