Disclaimers: No, I don't DNAngel. 'Braking the Habit' by Linkin Park. What more can I say?
Author's Notes: This was actually going to be for Daisuke, originally, but then I thought 'nah, not really' cause… well, the lyrics sure talk a lot more about pain and stuff. So Krad it was (it could have been for Dark or Satoshi as well, but since I already had songs for them…).
Track Three: Breaking the Habit
000
Memories consume like opening the wound
I'm picking me apart again
You all assume, I'm safe here in my room
Unless I try to start again
I don't want to be the one the battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize that I'm the one confused
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I know it's not alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight...
Clutching my cure, I tightly lock the door
I try to catch my breath again
I hurt much more, than any time before
I have no options left again
I don't want to be the one the battles always choose
'Cause inside I realize that I'm the one confused
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
I don't know why I instigate
And say what I don't mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight…
I'll paint it on the walls
'Cause I'm the one at fault
I'll never fight again
And this is how it ends
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
To show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight...
000
The night sky was as dreary as the day he'd first been placed on this god-forsaken world. A number of clouds were stretched out, obscuring the view of the moon and the countless stars that were scattered across the sky, just like a portrait that had been stolen only recently.
Stolen by the Phantom Thief known as Dark.
The person gritted their teeth slightly as he fought to control the hate that consumed him as he felt his host stirring slightly in discomfort. True, he needed that body if he wanted to live, but knowing that the Thief was hanging around was almost unbearable that he just wanted out to kill ever living Niwa around. It was that bad, but he knew that while this particular person still had control over his body, there was nothing that could be done.
He was just a curse in the eyes of the Hikari, after all. But as the hunter, he had to do what he was told, and that was just one thing:
Rid the world of Dark, the Wing Master and every other Niwa that was still in existence. If he could rid the land of their life, then he could finally be at peace. What would happen then? Complete violation or death?
If the Wing Master was dead with the thief then either choice seemed pretty good for him.
A blonde angel with pure white wings merely stood in the dimly lit room, focused on that single window within the bedroom of his host: An angel, yet not an angel; the light that was not.
A curse.
That was what he was known as, for the countless years when he was sealed in, and now was just another generation where he would try and kill Dark, only to fail and get sealed away until another of the Hikari blood was to come into life.
It was just an endless cycle.
One that would never end unless he could finally rid of the one who caused him all this pain.
The Niwa: those redheaded fools that continue to live on and continue giving birth and loving the fact that every first-born male would become another thief; another one of those people who stole from his own host and the blood that he served.
Dark: the thief, the black wings, the one who stole for the Niwas, the Wing Masters and took pleasure in the whole 'game', as he called it. A game with a lot on the plate, once he'd come into the picture.
Krad ground his teeth.
How long had he been with the Hikari anyway; sealed with some of the most powerful of spells? They didn't wish for him to exist, having found the error of their ways, and yet they ailed. The blonde knew this as a fact and that nothing would change it: he would continue to try and take over the body of the Hikari, or kill Dark and his host.
The Wing Master.
That who he loathed with every single sanity of his mind; it was because of that fool that he had been unable to completely take over Satoshi-sama's body when he'd had a chance. It was he who drew the last of the Hikari line astray.
And for that he would feel pain. Not just the usual take-and-kill routine, but a slow death that would have the boy screaming and begging for mercy, just so that it would all end. He would suffer to the end, and then it would be over.
And then…
Then it was just a blank.
Krad frowned at this, as his mind cleared subconsciously. That was his purpose in this world, and there was no other. What would become of him if he did kill them? Would he be free or would he be destroyed with them? Would both clans die off without a trace? Would the life of the artworks that the Hikari created so lovingly – and stolen away from the Niwas – be gone too? Would that just be the end of them all?
It was strange, seeing that it had been centuries that the blonde had been given time to think it over: to think over his purpose in this life, to see what would happen if it were to be accomplished, to see if this was what he really wanted in the end.
He had never questioned this thought before, so why was it now that everything was so different? It was like every other time that he and Dark had faced off, with the same results all the time; so why was it now that he was being so fretful about this time?
Would it be over after this?
Something about that seemed strangely absurd, but then again, his whole existence was pretty absurd. If his host was to suddenly go up to some unsuspecting stranger and said that he had a curse in him – another person, to say the least – they would probably send him to an asylum or something quite close to that.
Maybe this was all just a dream that would soon fade into nothingness and he would no longer have to suffer; Krad doubted that would happen, because that would mean that he was in a couple of thousand-year-old dream.
Nope, his only way out – or death – was more death, and more deaths after that. Lots of blood.
And yet the Wing Master was strangely different from the other hosts that had come and gone over the countless generations; something that Krad just couldn't pinpoint. Of course, it wasn't just that Satoshi-sama was actually attached to this boy and all the usual, but there was something truly different from him to, let's say, his grandfather. Maybe it was because the times when he could have rid of Dark he wanted him back as – not the curse and family tradition placed on him – but rather as his other half and, as much as he hated the thought of it, a friend. Him. A part of him that he couldn't live without.
But then, what was the blonde's reason to being here?
The whole kill-to-rid-the-curse seemed pointless now, even though it had been a long time since he'd come out, but then again, it was BECAUSE of the Niwa boy that he was able to break the seal of the Hikari. And then he was going to kill him.
Then Dark? What were his feelings for the Black Wings? It had been so long ago and for countless years and the years ahead all they had done was argue and fight, not giving any chance for some sane conversation that would explain why this was happening. And because of that they had called each other enemies since the time they were first sealed.
No questions were asked about.
Krad wondered if Dark was in as much pain as he was in now. They were similar in so many ways that it wasn't funny, but whenever he was around, it just hurt. The blonde knew his own host was suffering as well, so it made no sense and he would never find a reason either.
Was there really a reason to this anymore? Krad had no idea, but maybe it was time to look for those answers: even if he did have to keep acting like he hated Dark into oblivion and only wanted to kill them.
No, he just wanted answers now. That was it.
He would break the continuous chain that bound the fate of the Hikaris and the Niwas together. It didn't matter who got hurt in the process, since if it was the only way, so be it.
Satoshi-sama had been thinking that very same thing for a long time, ever since meeting the Niwa boy as a person and not as Dark. Maybe that was why the blonde was thinking this way.
Either way, this was going to be the last time.
000
I don't know what's worth fighting for
Or why I have to scream
But now I have some clarity
To show you what I mean
I don't know how I got this way
I'll never be alright
So I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
I'm breaking the habit
Tonight...
000
Whoa… intense Krad angst. Or something. I know that he's usually portrayed as some sort of sadistic bastard or something, but there's probably more to it. So that's why this is so.