For The Best.
All Final Fantasy 9 characters belong to square and not me.
Authors note: For this story, I have overlooked that fact that Vivi had children at the end of the game.
I never thought she would leave me. Throw me out, yes. Me to leave, yes. But for her to just leave, making a note being the only thing to remind me of how it was, one that she left not even for me to find, but with Steiner. It wasn't worth even thinking about back then because it was so ridiculous. Not for the fact that I was so cocky I thought she wouldn't leave me, but for the fact that she didn't just leave me, she left the whole of Alexandria, her home.
She never said exactly why she left, but I thought I could guess. It had been a hard struggle over those few years we had been ruling over Alexandria. I blamed everyone, everything, until I sat back and realised the only thing that could have happened was because of my own bastardly-stupid self.
When she left, I couldn't go after her. I had a city to rule.
I don't know where things would have started off, now I look back at it, it all seems tainted with a fake-happy edge to it. I suppose, I should start off at the wedding, go that far back and see if it was bad then. The wedding, the happiest day of my life...not.
Dagger, I mean, Garnet, was so wrapped up in the fact that we were getting married, the fact that Alexandria would have a king that she never noticed my attempts to ask her to stop, to take and step back and hear my side of this.
You see, I never wanted to get married, it wasn't because of Garnet, but I knew what it would make me feel like. Tied down. Tied down with no freedom. But I loved Garnet so much, I just wanted to make her feel alright, secure. Also, I knew Garnet would loose her people if she was with me and we weren't married. Being a Queen and not married to your partner, it just wasn't done.
I just wanted her to be happy.
We spent a fortune on the wedding. Pearls, sapphires, rubies, garnets, diamonds, all imported with the price jacked-up so many times... But I went along with all of it. I wore a suit that I didn't feel comfortable in, I had my hair cut short so that I wouldn't look scruffy, I even went along with all the make-up and styling so that I would look 'gorgeous' for the day, all for her.
The wedding was viewed from all the rooftops, like people do with a theatre, so I felt like I was acting in a play. But when Garnet, looking every inch the queen that she was, stepped out, glistening in garnets, rubies, pearls, sapphires, diamonds a at least a hundred other jewels I could not possibly name in this space, came out and the crowd cheered, it felt even more like a piece of acting. We got married, I mean, we said our lines and everything, but I never felt it was truly real. It felt more like a dream but with reality slipped in at the corners.
At the reception, I stayed close to Garnet, or leaned up against a wall. I knew no one, except my old friends, the Tantalus crew, Beatrix and Garnet of course, so I stayed out of everyone's way, later, when Garnet finally came over to me, I smiled at her and tried so hard to be happy, not just someone who wanted to go to bed early and for this nightmare to end. I mingled in with the crowd then, forcing up conversations with people, thanking them for their presents, listening to their comments on the wedding. And then, finally, they decided to leave. Garnet and I went to bed then, leaving the mess for the maids and servants to clean up.
The next day, we started work on OUR new rule over the land. I was accepted graciously as the new king. A person who knew what had to be done to Alexandria to make it a better, safer place. I tried hard on that too, just to see the smile on Garnet's face when she thought I was learning and coming up with good ideas.
Things were pretty good for a year, then things became doused down and we didn't see so much of each other. Our 'jobs' just did not allow it. We had to work so hard on that city that we forgot to keep our relationship intact. But I felt safe. Caged-in but safe. I didn't feel like it would all fall apart, I felt that we could live through anything. We could live through anything...
At the end of the second year, we still hadn't had an offspring to pass the royal crown down onto. Garnet and I were getting worried, and so, we took it out on each other. I still felt secure in our relationship, but Garnet was slipping, and I could see that. I took time off my jobs to help with hers and be around her, but all that did, was give us more opportunities for us to come to blows.
I got nervous around her, never sure if she would be in a good mood or not. At the end of the day, to help her unwind I would hum our song to her gently, massaging her feet and holding her close to me, comforting me too, that we would get through this and we would be fine.
Garnet and me, we were very happy to the outside world, to the kingdom we ruled over saw us happy and never arguing. Behind closed doors, we were shouting the castle down and Garnet was crying her eyes out while I was punching walls.
Two months afterwards, It was announced that Garnet was 2 weeks pregnant. Naturally, Garnet and I were over the moon. All traces of arguments and things that had happened just a few weeks ago were gone and we were inseparable. Whenever we weren't doing jobs, we were feeling for a kick or something, sure that we felt something each time. Garnet was the happiest I had ever seen her in two years and I certainly wasn't sad. And, then, the falseness lifted from me a bit and I didn't feel so caged in. eight months went by and then suddenly, at about 5 in the morning, Garnet woke me up by digging her nails into my back so hard. I turned round to look at her and she was completely white.
'I cant feel the baby anymore Zid...I CANT FEEL IT!' she started crying hysterically, for at that moment, we knew we wouldn't get our baby back.. The ambulance came and took us to hospital, but as we already knew, it was too late.
Garnet had to give birth to it still though, and that she did. I walked in afterwards to find her crying silently, over a blue, still baby. It had been a girl and she was a miniature version of her mother, but with golden-blonde hair, like my own.
We named her Zara and had a full funeral for her; she's buried next to her grandmother. She died from the umbical cord looping round her throat and strangling her in her sleep.
The next months that went by, they were sad and unforgiving. I don't remember doing much except lying on our bed, holding Garnet in my arms, stroking her hair while she cried. I finally remember getting up and looking outside, at the world around us, on a summers day, and I saw all we had worked at. I called Garnet over to the window and together we looked down at the birds singing on top of roofs and children skipping in the street, people selling fish, fruit and flowers to passers by and the Alexandrian soldiers, all marching round, lining up and saluting up at us.
I remember Garnet smiling then, looking up at me and saying 'we'll get through this wont we?' and me nodding with my eyes fixed on hers.
Holding Garnet's hand all the way, we managed to get on with our lives, together as possible, never more than a hand's reach away from each other, and eventually, we were able to run the kingdom again. I noticed every change in her feelings, felt them as if they were mine and acted upon them immediately. Our relationship was stronger than ever...