I'm not sure if I did this chapter justice.
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"Have you ever seen the look on someone's face when they know that they're doomed to die? I saw it that night over and over. Fathers put their daughters into boats while their young sons looked on, acknowledging that they were going to share the same fate as their dads. I saw newly weds crying together knowing that their time was up. I witnessed hundreds of people's deaths, and something like that you don't forget easily."
At Sea … April 14, 1912
The stars in the midnight black sky stuck out like tiny flecks of gold. There were millions, many more than you could have ever of seen on the clearest of nights. The sea was calm and the air frigid. Ruthie started shivering, her rosy cheeks turned pale, and her delicate lips purple. I warmed Ruthie's small frozen hand in mine, as I tried to keep warm myself.
The decks of the third class promenade were covered with shockingly white ice. "That's strange." I thought, wondering how it could have possibly gotten there. I strained my eyes to try to see what was out behind us in the murky dark. A large mass was floating dauntingly in the freezing water. Then the awful truth dawned. We had hit something. And that "something" was an iceberg.
I shifted over so I blocked the immense iceberg from Ruthie's view. She didn't need to see it, not after what had happened in the gates to father. Father. Tears came tumbling down my cheeks just at the thought of leaving him and four of the Sages behind. It felt like I had left part of me trapped on the other side of those cruel iron bars.
Ruthie tugged on my sleeve. "What's a matter Eva? Are you worried about Papa?" her little voice was full of concern. Unable to speak I nodded. I regretted every little fight I ever had with him, every time I yelled, every time I didn't obey. "It's okay Eva, we're going to see him again don't worry." She whispered, "It's okay." I looked down at the little person next to me. This wasn't the Ruthie that I had started the journey with, she was different. My sister was stronger than I was.
"Come on children we have to find a life boat." Mrs. Sage sounded like she had a bad head cold. My heart filled with pity, she had left three children and her husband behind.
She led us down weaving through other couples, other families, other lovers saying goodbye. I listen vaguely to their last conversations, words swimming in and out of my ears. "It's goodbye for a little while, only for a little while. This boat is for the mummies and children, but my boat will be along soon. Be a good girl and hold mummy's hand alright?" One father said soothingly to his child. Couples everywhere were kissing, clinging to each other, not wanting to let go.
We were on the second class decks now, (the captain had ordered the gates separating the classes to be opened.) My footing felt strange. I looked down to realize that the bow was slanting dangerously, and very soon it seemed, water would be sloshing over. Mrs. Sage was panicking, her littlest son bawling in her arms. Dorothy, Willy, Ruthie and I clutched each other, determined to stay warm in the cold night air as we continued our long journey to find safety.
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It happened in a blink of an eye. Terror swept up and down the deck, as the last life boat was launched. The last one.
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Dorothy fell to pieces, and sitting down on the deck she let the tears drip down her nose. The sounds of people screaming echoed in our ears. Bodies were everywhere, running down the decks, searching in vain for just one boat. Ruthie had an alarmed look in her eyes. "What's going on?" she yelled over the crowd. I didn't want to say, it seemed that if I did it would be final, forever, no going back. To say it would confirm our doom. I picked Ruthie up so I wouldn't lose her in the swarming crowd, and she lay her head down on my shoulder, grasping her hands over her ears. I swung around expecting to see Mrs. Sage and her children at our sides. Dread filled my already queasy stomach,
Mrs. Sage was no where in sight.