Note: I do not own s-CRY-ed, or any other intellectual properties. They are all copyrights of their respectful owners. The rest, however, is MINE, BEE-YOTCHES!
WARNING: Reading this load of crap will be detrimental to your IQ. Proceed at your own discretion.
It's PARODY TIME!
GYRAX Presents…
s-CRYING-ed: In a Nutshell
Episode 24: F.I.S.T.!
INTRO
KAZUMA: ... Crybaby.
RYUHO: Didn't you tell me to cry last episode?
KAZUMA Oh yeah...
MEANWHILE
KUJO: Here's me acting like your typical villain. Man, it feels good to be a gangsta!
IN THE MEANTIME
ILYON: My network's back up.
MIMORI: AWWW YEAH! WHO'S THE BITCH NOW, MUJO? I JUST TORCHED YOR ASS, MAN! I TORCHED YOUR ASS! By the way, how's Ryuho doing?
ILYON: Great, although he was supposed to be dead.
MIMORI: How is he still alive, then?
ILYON: Think. Trace back to every anime you've ever seen and try to figure out what most of them have in common?
MIMORI: The "sacrifice yourself to revive someone" cliché! Someone gave his/her life to save him. (Thank god it ain't Kazuma, seeing how he's stil alive.)
ILYON: SCHERIS ADJANI'S DEAD? AND COUGAR, TOO!
MIMORI: WHAAAAAAAAAAAT? THAT'S BULL----!
URIZANE: HEY! That was my line!
MIMORI: Sorry. the girl was really growing on me. You know I was planning on going out with her in case Ryuho went Yaoi on Kazuma.
ILYON: You nut-job. What about Cougar? And is the author trying to balance the Shounen-ai subtext with Yuri?
MEANWHILE
MUJO: I'm gonna read your minds and exploit every weakness like the "Mary-Sue" that I am! Oh, and if I'm a "Mary-Sue", then why does everyone hate me? I thought they attract every member of the opposite sex. (Or the same sex in extreme cases.)
KAZUMA: You have God-like powers for one thing! (And what does he mean by "same-sex attraction"?)
RYUHO: Meowth! That's right!
KAZUMA: You're gonna say that through the whole episode, aren't you?
RYUHO: Meowth! That's right!
MUJO: Well, allow me to use my God-like powers and KILL YOU ALL! BECAUSE I'M BETTER THAN EVERYONE! I AM GOD!
KAZUMA: Hey, kiss my ass!
RYUHO: Meowth! That's right!
MYSTERIOUS ALTER: Many greetings, Ryuho. Shalt we dance?
RYUHO: Sorry, Kazuma. I'm preoccupied at the moment. Perhaps, you can take care of Mujo yourself.
KAZUMA: Screw you!
MUJO: Well, Kazuma. Shall we dance?
KAZUMA: I was so looking forward to this, bitch!
(They FIGHT.)
MUJO: Your attempts to berate me are amusing, little one! I am Mujo! I am the one! I am the Matrix! WHOOSH!
(AUDIENCE is SUPPOSED TO BE captivated by his BULLET TIME SKILLZ, but they hate him too much to do so.)
MUJO: And I shall make you my bitch!
KAZUMA: I don't like the sound of that.
MUJO: Time to use my God-like powers! (He KICKS HIS ASS.)
KAZUMA: I hate you! Where's Canti when you need him?
KANAMI: Where's Darth Vader when you need him?
KAZUMA: Screw Canti! I'm going for a magical comeback!
MUJO: Those are dangerous, aren't they?
KAZUMA: I don't give a f---! SSJ4 TIME, BEE-YOTCHES!
COUGAR: And here's me using the last of my life to make a minor appearance, and ge the children out before they're subjected to the oncoming gratuitous violence.
MUJO: I'll stop you before you transform! (He tries, but hurts his hands in the process.) DAMMIT! WHY CAN'T I STOP IT!
KAZUMA: Haven't you seen that episode of DBZ when Trunks tried to stop Cell from transforming into perfect form? Yeah, it was futile because you can't stop transformations in the process; it's against the laws of anime. The villains from Sailor Moon are well aware of this.
MUJO: Oh, sh--! You got a point!
KAZUMA: NOW I'M SSJ4, BEE-YOTCH! AND THIS TIME, I MAKE YOU MY BITCH!
MUJO: Mufasa? YOU'RE ALIVE?
KAZUMA: THE LION KING IS IN THE HIZZOUSE! (He kicks Mujo's ASS.)
MUJO: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! I'M HIS BITCH! (GENDOWNED!)
MEANWHILE
RYUHO: I guess it's my turn. SSJ4 MODE ACTIVATE! ZETSUEI! FUSE WITH ME!
ZETSUEI: You're kidding, right Jack?
RYUHO: FUSE WITH ME, DAMMIT!
(They FUSE)
MYSTERIOUS ALTER: Somethig doth tell me I art screwed!
RYUHO: Damn straight! (He KICKS ASS.)
MYSTERIOUS ALTER: VAPRORIZED!
MEANWHILE
KAZUMA: Good riddance. Ever since he came in the picture, he practically ruined the story.
RYUHO: Had fun, Simba?
KAZUMA: Yeah, no thanks to you.
RYUHO sweatdrops: I said I was preoccupied. You know, past scores and crap.
KAZUMA: Whatever.
MUJO: Guess who's back! And uglier than ever to boot!
RYUHO: Pathetic. He's a corny villain right down to his "I came back in an ugly super-powerful monster form" core. Care to take care of him, Mufasa --- I mean, Kazuma?
KAZUMA: SCREW YOU! Oh hell, I'll kick his ass again because I hate his guts!
MUJO: Kick my ass? But I'm a monster, which means I'm even more powerful then before!
KAZUMA: Shut the f--- up! Time to pull off a Sylvester Stallone reference!
MUJO: Which movie woulde that be? Rocky? Rambo?
KAZUMA: Even better! F.I.S.T.! (He PUNCHES HIM to ABSOLUTE OBLIVION.)
RYUHO: Mujo has left the building!
KAZUMA: And thank God!
OUTSIDE A NOW COLLAPSED HOLY HQ
MIMORI: Everyone's safe, too. (Except for the dead people.) Amazing how the world is so much better without Mujo. Damn, he must have really sucked.
The End, Bee-yotches!
Next Time…
s-CRYING-ed: In a Nutshell
Episode 25: The Angry Natives
Author's Notes:
Only two more to go. Hang on there, people!
Am i the only one here who saw the movie F.I.S.T. starring Sylvester Stallone? (Actually I saw the movie in sociology class.) For those who haven't seen it, the title stands for "Federation of InterState Truckers".
Until next time, ciao!
-GYRAX