A/N: Chapter five is up; it is a little shorter than the others and I was able to process it faster than I had originally imagined, so here it is. Thank you for all kind words. If you could see me, you would see me blushing violently at your praise.
Elwen of Lorien: Nice to hear from somebody with Danish ancestry; Maddy – sorry I'm doing it again….. but that should not keep you from updating your story! Lialathuveril: Thank you, I am doing my best. Blue Eyes at Night: Don't worry; you will get the wedding …., etc.!
Chapter Five
The morning dawned with sunshine and a clear blue sky. There was a chill in the air, but it was all in all a lovely day for a wedding. Éowyn looked as if she had had a good night's sleep, probably induced by some good Gondorian wine and perhaps some Elvish magic? Arwen had whispered to me last night that she had learned a thing of two from her father as to getting a nervous woman to sleep peacefully the night before her wedding. I would not exactly characterise Éowyn as nervous, though, she seemed more excited than anything. Either way, the sleep had done her good.
After Éowyn had bathed in luxurious, flower-scented oils and dried her long, wavy golden hair, she looked like a water nymph, and when we got her dressed in her white wedding dress, complete with the jewels of her house and a veil held by a golden circlet, she looked an absolute goddess.
"By the Valar, you will take his breath away," I said to her, as I arranged the veil and moved away so that she could see herself in the mirror. The shieldmaiden of Rohan looked at her image as if she did not believe that it was really she. Arwen came up to her and placed a brooch of Elvish making on her breast.
"Believe it," she said smilingly recognising Éowyn's expression, "you look beautiful. And I ask you to accept this as my gift for you. It once belonged to my grandmother, but I wanted you to have it in memory of the Eldar." Éowyn embraced the Queen of Gondor, thanking her cordially.
There was a knock on the door and Éomer's voice could be heard outside the door. "Are you ready, little sister? It is time."
Cerwyn opened the door and let him in. I heard him catch his breath as he caught sight of his sister. "Éowyn! You are …. Béma help Faramir," he stuttered. I could not help laughing and he turned towards me, his eyes lighting up as they took me in.
I wore the light sea green dress, which I had had made at Dol Amroth. I had braided my hair with golden bands and fastened it with the emerald clips and around my neck I wore the golden chain, which had once belonged to Éomer's mother. Éomer looked appreciatively at me and stated, "Béma help me as well; it is a good thing that I do not have to choose between you."
"No, luckily you do not; I believe that you would do well not offending any of the ladies, then we might have a casualty on our hands," Cerwyn said dryly as she looked at the king.
Éomer grinned impishly and then offered his arm to his sister. "Time to go, sister. He is waiting for you," he said softly. The siblings looked at each other, hazel and blue eyes locked and they smiled. Once again the closeness and the understanding that those two shared seized me. I knew that Éomer was happy on his sister's behalf and that he was happy that she had found somebody like Faramir. The look that they shared conveyed it all. Éowyn whisked away a tear and we all followed them out the door on the way to the citadel, where the ceremony joining the White Lady of Rohan to the Steward of Gondor in marriage was to take place.
Éomer walked proudly with his sister's arm in his towards the dais where Faramir was waiting together with my father and Aragorn. Leia and I followed behind them. I could tell from the faces of the ladies present that the King of Rohan was an impressive sight as he walked his sister up the aisle.
And he was, indeed. Seeing him, it was difficult to tell that the men had been up most of the night, or indeed what they had been up to; only slight traces could be seen in their faces. Éomer certainly did not act impeded by anything. Tall and straight-backed as always and dressed in a knee-length, dark-green tunic with gold embroideries that matched his golden hair, which was so like his sister's. He wore his crown and cloak, and his tanned and serious face made him look even more regal and attractive. I was proud of him and pleased of the fact that he was mine.
Faramir's face lit up as he saw his bride approaching and the happiness was very evident in his eyes, as he bowed to Éomer and walked down the steps of the dais to greet Éowyn. Éomer followed them up the dais and stood behind as they faced Aragorn.
He placed Éowyn's hand in Faramir's and spoke his blessing of the marriage in a loud and strong voice; then he kissed his sister's cheek and moved down to stand beside me. I took his hand and squeezed it and our hands remained joined as we heard Éowyn and Faramir speak their vows to each other and heard Aragorn pronounce and bless their union.
As he did, Éomer looked at me. I could tell from his eyes and his smile that he was thinking exactly the same as I was. In a few months it will be our turn!
And then suddenly I could not care less how many female eyes were resting on my king. I was very sure in my love for him – and indeed in his for me.
After the ceremony, we followed the newly wed couple into the hall where the celebrations were to take place. The grand hall had been decorated with banners in the colours of Rohan and Gondor, the tables were laid with shining white tablecloths and candles burned in enormous silver candelabras. Faramir lead his bride to the head of the table; Aragorn and Arwen sat on one side of the couple, Éomer and I on the other side. Ada was placed beside Queen Arwen.
We laughed and talked through a large number of courses; it truly became a feast that could match the wedding of the king and queen. Arwen and Aragorn had done everything in their power to ensure that the wedding of their steward would be as grand as their own.
At one point Éomer looked up and down the table and at the decorations. His gaze became thoughtful and I looked inquisitively at him. "What is it, Éomer?" I urged. He hesitated, as he looked at me.
"Only, Lothíriel, that I will not be able to give you a feast which is as grand as this. You know that my country has suffered greatly and we shall not be able to provide anything remotely like this."
"As if that mattered to me, Éomer. Have I not told you that even if you lived in a cave, I would live with you and be happy. Grand feasts are nothing to me. If indeed I were able to choose, I would rather that you stole me away this evening after we had spoken our vows before Aragorn – or out in the field where only the Valar would hear us."
Éomer lit up at my words. "Sometimes I am too foolish for my own good," he murmured. "Even after all these months I still doubt what I see and hear in you, Lothy. Please forgive me."
Of course I forgave him and I did understand how he felt seeing this grandeur. I took his hand under the cover of the tablecloth. "Éomer, I am sure that our wedding will be as grand as this – in its own way." I hesitated for a moment and then added. "And fortunately it will not be as stuffy as this; I am sure that your – our – people are much better at celebrating!"
Éomer grinned. "Indeed they are. Well, somehow I knew that this would be your reaction. I knew there was a reason why I love you so much." He squeezed my hand. "Thank you, my love. You always know how to set me right when I am being a fool."
I smiled at him. "Yes, I do. Now, my Lord I believe that it is time for the King of Rohan to toast his sister and her husband."
Éomer nodded, gave a sign to the house steward and rose. I knew that he still felt slightly awkward when he had to address an assembly as this. He had certainly no qualms when it came to shouting orders to his men.
So he gave the speech and did quite well. We toasted the couple; Éomer's voice broke only once as he congratulated his sister and her husband. It was clear to everybody that the siblings would miss each other terribly when they were far apart. I could easily understand that; after all there were only the two of them left, they were bereaved of their family whereas I still had my brothers and my father - and my dear cousin.
Éomer teased his sister about her cooking and suggested that Faramir should ensure that she hired a cook. This brought about a smirk on Aragorn's face, and I made a mental note that I had to ask Éomer, or Aragorn himself, why Éowyn's cooking abilities amused them so and had everybody smirking when they were mentioned.
Finally, Éomer warned his brother-in-law of the temper which his bride possessed. "Just get out of the way fast, if during an argument she ever picks up an object which looks like it could easily be thrown. Trust me, I know how deadly she hits her target."
"Now she will probably find something to throw at me, but so be it,'" he grinned as he sat down beside me. I did not, however, allow him to sit for long. I wanted to dance – with him. I told him as much. For once he did not complain, and I was grateful for it.
"I love holding you like this," he murmured as he put a hand on the small of my back and pressed me against him. He had dispersed of his crown and his cloak for the dancing, ordering one of the servants to take them to his chamber, murmuring that it was hot enough without these items. I smiled inwardly; I knew that he did not like much wearing the regalia of his position, still feeling a bit out of place.
"I would not say so in front of my sister, but you are, indeed, the loveliest lady here tonight," he said.
I laughed softly. "That must be in the eye of the beholder, my Lord, and I am sure that my brother and my cousin would challenge you on this point." I indicated Amrothos, who was dancing with his Leia, gazing deeply into her blue eyes.
"I am sure that they would, but they would not win." Éomer murmured.
Faramir and Éowyn were also dancing, laughing merrily and Faramir was holding his wife very close.
"They look so happy together; every time I have seen them these past months it strikes me. I had never thought that he would be the one to pull her out of that hard shell of hers, but Faramir, Captain of Gondor certainly shows qualities," Éomer said, suddenly serious, as we stopped dancing and just stood in the doorway watching them.
"Sadly his father never realised that," I said. "As you told you once at the Houses of Healing, my cousin is a truly good and worthy man."
"Aye, that he is," Éomer concurred, "and probably the only man, who can truly make her happy, because he understands her."
He pulled at my hand. "Now, sweet lady, walk with me. I have humoured you and danced several more dances than I intended to; now it is your turn to humour me. It is hot in here, and I do need some fresh air."
I smiled. "Far be it from me to deny the King of Rohan anything of that nature." And I followed his lead, until we reached our favourite spot; the small bench near the garden wall, overlooking the city.
I let go of Éomer's hand and walked over to stand with my back against the wall, facing him. "So you led me here again, my Lord. And what are your intentions this time?" Éomer looked at me, his dark eyes glittering in the chilly, crisp night air.
"My intentions, my Lady? My intentions are what they have been for a long, long time now. Besides, I wanted you to myself for a little while." He went over to me and stood before me pinning me to the wall, one hand on my waist and one hand resting against the wall. Then he dipped his head to let his lips cover mine.
"Are you cold?" he whispered softly against my lips.
"No, not with you standing so close," I whispered back, letting my hands glide down his back. And I really did not feel the cold as I felt his body pressing against mine. After a while he broke away.
His hands moved up to cup my face; caressing my ears with his thumbs he looked me straight into the eyes. "Lothy, my love, you are doing it again – I simply lose all self-control around you," he moaned, "Frustration is not the right word for what I feel …..."
"And how do you think that I feel?" I asked. "It works both ways, you know, but it cannot be helped. Do you not think that we should go back to the hall? It must be time soon to accompany the happy couple to their conjugal bed."
"Yes, it is almost time – and how I envy Faramir!" Éomer growled as he stole one more kiss and then took my hand to go back. Just before we reached the door, he suddenly turned and smiled embarrassedly at me. "Sorry about that outburst, Lothy."
I smiled back. "It is alright, my love."
Luckily no one had noticed our absence; it seemed to me that my youngest brother and Leia also had made themselves scarce. Faramir was announcing that he and his wife would be withdrawing from the company, which caused modest cheering and applause (and mostly from the Rohirrim present). After all, we were at Minas Tirith. Éomer and I went up to stand beside Aragorn.
He smiled at us and murmured to Éomer. "This sort of announcement would cause a bit more cheering and catcalling at Edoras."
Éomer nodded, "Well, yes, it would most certainly, but then you Gondorians are so well behaved." He grinned at Aragorn, who snorted quite unregally.
According to the traditions of Gondor, which had also been upheld at Arwen and Aragorn's wedding, the bride and groom would be accompanied to the conjugal chamber by a number of witnesses, mostly their immediate family and dignitaries of the realms – in this case my father, my brothers, Éomer, Aragorn, Arwen, myself and a couple of elderly Gondorian nobles and their wives, as well as Leia's father Halfred, Gamling and Cerwyn.
Arwen, Cerwyn and I helped Éowyn undress and put on the delicate silk nightgown and robe, which had been made especially for this occasion – although when Éowyn had shown it to us, Cerwyn had inquired with usual Rohirric gusto whatever a nightgown was necessary for on a wedding night? That remark had left Arwen and me almost breathless from laughing and Éowyn giggling hysterically.
The men helped Faramir get into his robe – presumably under much rowdy joking, as far as we could tell. Then we led the couple to their conjugal bed and left them with all good wishes for their future life together. The last thing I noticed before the door closed behind us were Éowyn's eyes twinkling at her husband and my cousin smiling adoringly at her.
We went back to the hall to continue the celebrations, toasting the bride and groom and continuing the dancing far into the night. I danced a couple of dances with my betrothed, Aragorn and Éothain – and talked at length with Arwen and some of the other ladies. At one point, quite late in the night, I felt like I had had enough celebration and went to find Éomer to say goodnight.
I found him at a table with my brothers, Éothain, Gamling and Gimli and it did not seem as any of them had any intentions of going to bed anytime soon. I bid them all good night and left. Éomer rose to kiss my hand but otherwise did not take much notice of me, bidding me an absentminded goodnight. I shook my head - Men! I thought and wandered off to bed.
Next morning I woke – much earlier than expected. I had been awoken by a sound coming from the doors to the balcony. It sounded like knocking? I opened my eyes, my vision still slightly blurred, and saw Éomer? How in all of Middle Earth had he managed to get there? He gestured at me and I got out of bed and went to the door to let him in.
"Do you realise that it gets bloody cold standing out here?" he inquired and then seemed to lose his speech. He was just staring at me, his eyes glazing over. I looked at him, somehow wondering at his reaction, until I glanced down at myself.
I had been so tired when I finally reached my room that I had not bothered finding my nightgown, slipping out of my gown and going to sleep just dressed in my thin slip. I now realised that it did absolutely nothing to even modestly hide my body.
Éomer was still staring at me. "Éomer, love – could you please turn your back and permit me to get into something more decent," I asked.
He grinned at me, "I do not mind, you know," but he nodded and did as I asked, however, only after raking one more glance down my body. He turned his back and I desperately tried to find my robe.
Had I been more awake, I might actually have found out that my beloved was still more than a bit inebriated from last night's celebrations. His speech was slightly blurred and his grin held something that I did not readily define.
"Why have you come this early? And how did you get up here?" I inquired.
He grinned. "Lothy, my love. I live two doors down the corridor from you --- and we actually share this balcony. With Amrothos, too, it seems, but as far as I could tell, he is still sleeping - soundly I might add. And I found it a brilliant idea to take a morning ride with my betrothed before everybody awakes."
I yawned. "Truly an excellent idea, my soon-to-be-husband. My head could certainly do with a bit of fresh air. Just give me some time to ……" and then it dawned on me. I turned towards him.
"How come that you are so perky this morning; the last time I saw you, you were sharing a couple of kegs of ale with Éothain and my brothers?"
"Rightly so," Éomer grinned rakishly, "but I can certainly hold my liquor better than any of them – save Gimli, of course. Can I turn around now?" he inquired.
"Yes, by all means, I am fairly decent." I said.
He grinned at me, "So I see, and how about a good morning kiss for your husband-to-be?" He came over to me and put his arms around me; he was reeking from smoke and ale I ascertained as he bent to kiss me.
I allowed him a little kiss and then I put my hands on his chest and pushed as I wrinkled my nose. "When did you leave the party to go to bed, you say?" I inquired as I now realised that he was still intoxicated.
"About half an hour ago, I'd said," Éomer grinned sheepishly, "and I suppose that I am still reeling a bit, but nothing more than an hour's ride in the fresh air cannot cure me of. Come on, Lothy, come riding with me. Don't be angry with me."
I was, though. Turning up like this – right from drinking with the other men, smelling of ale and spirits. I looked at him, furrowing my brow. "I am not riding anywhere with you – not in that condition. I will take you for a walk to get some fresh air and then I will take you back, make you some herbal tea and get you to bed."
"To bed, my Lady. Not such a bad idea – may I assume that you will be joining me?" he chuckled, as he reached out for me, trying to kiss me again.
"You most certainly may not, my Lord. And if you continue like this, you can go straight to bed ---- and leave me be!" I spat out; I was getting very angry and before I knew it, I was shoving him out of the door. "Now, get out – go to your bed and sleep it off!" I closed the door behind him and locked it. I was infuriated and disappointed. Men! Why were they always like that – even Éomer!
He stood for a moment outside the door, looking at me in utter surprise. Then his face darkened and he turned abruptly and left. I flung myself on my bed and lay looking up at the ceiling, angry that he had turned up like that. But as I lay there fuming, a thought snuck into my head and calmed me somewhat. So he came to you, drunk and silly – but is that not better than if he found some other willing lass to keep him company? After all, what have your brothers not presented you with over the years? You love him, do you not?
I listened to the little voice of reason, made up my mind and rose from the bed. I unlocked the balcony door and peered outside. Not a sound could be heard, nor anyone seen. I pulled my robe tightly around me and closed the door behind me; then I went in the direction that I had seen Éomer go. I passed Amrothos' room; I could see through the balcony doors that my brother was sleeping soundly, lying flat on his back with his mouth open; he was still dressed. Obviously he had not reached his bed until very early this morning either. I could almost hear him snore through the closed doors. What a remarkable, charming sight!
I reached Éomer's room and looked in through the door. The King of Rohan looked as if he had just dropped onto his bed without removing his clothes or boots. I tried the balcony door; he had not bothered to lock it and I slipped quietly in. I shook my head at the sight. I had often enough seen my brothers in that state, and I suppose that it would not be the last time, either, that I would see my beloved as such. After all, men were like that when they were together.
I looked at my betrothed and could not help giggling. How men were helpless! And then I decided to remove some of his clothing – or at least his boots – and make him a little more comfortable. I managed to pull of his boots and started to undo his tunic, not an easy task. For a woman, I was no weakling and I had had a lot of practice at the Houses of Healing, but Éomer was a large man. Finally I managed to get him out of the tunic, leaving him in his breeches and shirt. I struggled at pulling the covers over him and finally managed. He mumbled something in his sleep and rolled onto his back, still fairly unconscious.
I stood looking at him. The love of my life was sleeping peacefully now, snoring lightly. Not less charming to behold! I shook my head. With three brothers, I was no stranger to drunken behaviour and to nursing hangovers. Éomer would surely sleep several hours, and when he finally came to, he would probably be the victim of a major hangover. Well, be that as it may – I was going back to my bed to get some more sleep. I would deal with the hangover later.
I crept back along the wall past my brother's room; as far as I could tell he was still sleeping hard and would be for some time yet. I got to my room, removed my robe and went back to bed.
When I woke, it was quite late in the day. I got up, washed, dressed and went out onto the balcony to get some fresh air as I was brushing my hair. It was cloudy and windy; it was a winter's day. I heard a noise behind me and turned to see Éomer coming out onto the balcony, still only dressed in his shirt and breeches and his hair all tousled from sleep. He squinted against the light of day and growled. "Béma's Balls. This is about the last time that I will subject myself to this …." Then he became aware of my presence.
"Lothy, love …….. Good morning - or is it day? Sorry, my mind seems quite blurred. Did I actually come into your room very early this morning? I remember vaguely doing that – but then I just woke up in my bed, and somehow I must have been able to remove my boots and most of my clothing before I fainted." Éomer frowned and held a hand to his forehead.
I chuckled. "Actually you did pay me a visit, and you tried to kiss me – which I refused because you reeked like a tavern. Further you did not remove your clothes on your own. I followed you and found out that you had just collapsed on your bed – with all your clothes on. So, I helped you out of some of them and removed your boots. But I must say, I really had to work for it. You are strong, even in your sleep."
He attempted to grin at me but it only resulted in a grimace. "I probably weigh more than half your weight more than you --- and it was deadweight as I was both drunk and fast asleep. Good work, Lothy. It is good to know that I am getting a wife, who can take care of me in any situation."
"Blame it on my abilities as a healer, and the fact that I am the sister of three older brothers. I suppose that my skills will still be necessary now that I am marrying one of the Éorlingas?" I teased.
"Probably yes, as our favourite pastime in winter is drinking!" This time Éomer grinned. "I will go soak my head in a bucket of water, get dressed and then I will take my lady to breakfast – or whatever is served at this time of day?"
A little later he reappeared, washed, dressed and with his hair combed, although still wet.
"Now, that is more like it." I said.
"So, do I qualify for a good morning kiss now; I have cleaned my teeth?" Éomer inquired, one brow raised.
"Yes, you do," I said. He pulled me into an embrace and kissed me.
"Hmm, nice," I ascertained, "You certainly both taste and smell better than you did this morning. One more time, please."
"Only too happy to comply, my Lady," Éomer mumbled and did as asked.
"I knew that it would be a good thing that I had the room between you two," a voice said. Amrothos stood in the doorway to his room, looking just as dishevelled and hungover as Éomer had done a while before.
"Good morning, brother dear!" I said in a loud voice, as I knew that Amrothos' ears tended to be sensible the morning after. "We were just going downstairs to get something to eat."
"So I see," my brother mumbled ironically. "And could you please keep your voice down, sister dearest?"
"Sensible this morning, are we?" I inquired sweetly. "Will you not join us? Leia has most certainly been awake for several hours by now, and is probably wondering what is keeping her charming prince," I continued, smiling teasingly at my brother.
"Probably not," Éomer joined in, "she is Rohirric and has Éothain for a brother-in-law, she is no stranger to what men do; she will not be shocked."
"Neither am I," I proffered, "Being the sister of Amrothos --- and two more like him I have spent more than my share of time holding foreheads and bringing damp cloths and herbal tea to diminish the afterglow of wild debauchery!"
"Trust me, you will need those skills with the man, who is going to be your husband," Amrothos retorted and grimaced at Éomer.
"That may be – but not as often as you, I seem to recall," my beloved shot back.
I put my hands on my hips. "If you two have finished insulting each other, I for one would like something to eat."
Éomer smiled at me. "Of course, my sweet. If we see Leia, we can always send her to assist the man of her dreams." Then he took my hand and we wandered off towards the dining hall.
As we had anticipated, only a few guests had found their way to the dining hall. Éowyn and Faramir had ordered breakfast to be sent to their chambers; my father had already had his and had gone for a walk. The king and queen were nowhere to be seen – and Leia hurried off to Amrothos' chamber, when I told her that my brother probably was in need of her help.
"Mightily hungover, I suppose?" she inquired as she prepared to rise.
I nodded. "I suppose that you are no stranger to such conditions?"
Leia just sent me a smile as she disappeared.
At the table occupied by the hobbits, Gimli, Legolas, Éothain and Gamling, only the elf seemed untouched by the ongoings of last night. The hobbits and Gimli were consuming their usual quantities of food and morning ale, nodding their good mornings to us. Éothain and Gamling, however, looked as they had seen the bottom of one too many tankards of ale. When Gimli saw Éomer, he chuckled. "At least you look better than your marshals, Éomer King."
"Do I not always?" Éomer grinned.
Gamling raised his head and shot a look at his king from bloodshot eyes.
"My Lord Éomer," he said sarcastically, "you seem to have rested well?"
"Oh, indeed." Éomer said grinningly as we sat down to eat. Amrothos and Leia soon joined us – and surprisingly enough both Éomer and Amrothos ate with good appetite.
"How can you?" I asked.
"Long time's practice," my brother chuckled and Éomer seconded that.
"As a soldier you can always eat, drink --- and sleep. Apparently my two trusted marshals have forgotten that. Are you getting soft, now that the war is over – or otherwise an elf and a dwarf proved too hard a task for you last night?"
He grinned at his marshals. Gamling made a face at his king; Éothain just groaned, and the two of them mumbled something inaudible, which certainly sounded like an insult to their king. Éomer chose to overhear it, he knew his friends too well, and just grinned.
After the meal, Éomer leaned towards me. "Now I feel like getting some fresh air. Will you join me for a ride, my Lady?"
I nodded. "Gladly. Now I think that it is a better idea than when you suggested the same thing early this morning," I said.
He looked at me, slightly confused. "I did what?"
"You suggested this morning when you came to my room that we go for a ride, before the others woke."
"And …?" Éomer looked inquisitively at me.
"I refused – because I believed you to be in no condition to ride, let alone find the stables."
Éomer looked perplexed at me. "Because you thought that I was in no condition to ride … Let me tell you something, my Lady. I have ridden Firefoot under all conditions: wounded, drunk – almost unconscious – and he has never let me down. I could ride him under any conditions! For the sake of Béma, woman, I am a Horse Lord!" His voice was angry.
I bit my tongue, but my temper got the better of me. "My Lord," I said, the sarcasm very evident in my voice, "you were in no condition to take me out riding this morning, let alone guiding yourself to the stables, therefore I decided that I would not go with you."
I had heard about the vile temper that the King of Rohan possessed. Surely there had been no prior reason for it to surface, but now I saw traces of it as his eyes became dark with fury. He hissed, "Well, then – my Lady – if you do not think me fit to ride with you, I shall certainly not impose my company on you; I shall go alone!" He pushed back his chair and stormed out of the dining hall, leaving me confused – and infuriated.
I rose and tossed my napkin on the table. The others looked at us, but did not interfere. As I prepared to storm out of the hall as well, Gamling came up to me. "My Lady, he did not mean it. He will get around, I am sure. Just let him ride it off."
I nodded, but I felt the tears pressing on and just wanted to get out of the room. This was the first disagreement that I had ever had with Éomer. We had argued, but never to this extent. Surely we would have more arguments, it was inevitable, but the exchange had truly upset me.
Cerwyn placed a hand on my arm, but I shook it off and ran to my room, flung myself on the bed and cried my heart out.