A sandy haired little boy with mischievous eyes sat in the principal's office. Once again he was the instigator of a prank on one of his teachers. One of his co conspirators pointed a finger at him and then refused to take the fall. This was the reason he was in the principal's office.

"Chandler what are we going to do with you?" the principal said as she shook her head and looked at the manilla folder."We have tried to get in contact with your parents , but no such luck. The houseboy keeps saying he'll give them the message."

Of course his parents didn't care. They had their own little lives. His mother had discovered she had a talent for writing erotic fiction and closed herself up in her bedroom to write. His father was just a plain mystery. He would come home from work and then go to his own room. Each of his parents had their own bedroom . Chandler didin't know much, but he knew that normal parents didn't sleep in separate bedrooms.

"Mrs. Reese, I didn't know those girls were in the locker room when I set off the sprinkler system." Chandler tried to beg for mercy.

"Mr. Bing, this is just your latest prank. I am afraid that when we do get ahold of your parents , we are going to discuss the options of sending you to a private school , possibly even military school." She said as she moved the glasses back onto the chain around her neck. "Now I suggest you go back to class. We are done." Chandler jumped down from the chair. He walked down the hall and turned back to see if she was gone. "Yeah right!" he cried.

Coming in from school, Chandler opened the large doors to his house. It really wasn't a normal house, it was a mansion. Since Nora and Charles were very successful, Chandler had the privileges that other kids dreamed of. He had his own library, where he could escape the world through books. His favorite from when he was very young was The Velveteen Rabbit. He also liked to read science fiction and watch reruns of Star Trek.

"Would you like a snack Mr. Chandler?" smiled the houseboy Antonio . He was Chandler's special friend. He would get him whatever he wanted. Charles seemed to have a special connection with Antonio and if he had to go to the store or into New York, Antonio would accompany Chandler's father. Chandler sat at his desk and began to drink the Yohoo with a crazy straw. He never really liked the fancy gourmet fare his parents indulged in. He much would have rather had his favorite food in the whole world Macaroni and cheese and cut up hot dogs.

Charles came up the stairs and walked right past his son. He had a drink in his hand. Lugging the briefcase, he slammed the door to his room and turned on the stereo… carefully he looked through his collection… Judy, Bette,no this one… suddenly Charles blared the music and the singer

I was born in the wagon on the traveling show

My momma used to dance for the money they stole

Grandpa did whatever he could

Preach a little gospel

Sell a couple bottles of doctor good

Gypsies tramps and thieves

We hear it from the people of the town they call us

Gypsies tramps and thieves

But every night all the men would come around and lay the money down.

With his rich baritone voice , Charles would stand in front of his mirror. He would be uncomfortable in his guise as a man, Charles wouldn't come to life until he would pull on the nylons and style his wig and then do his face like a woman. Then he wasn't Charles , he was Helena , a beautiful and sexy woman. This world he had to keep a secret . He had a wife, a good job , and an intelligent son.

On the other hand, Nora sat at her typewriter with a cigarette in her mouth and a martini on her desk. She would imagine their hot pool boy Raoul, and how he looked in his speedos. Then she would begin to think of her lover and how he thrilled her when her husband was earning the money for her to spend. "Charles, a lover?" that was a laugh. Charles and her decided to stay married , for the good of the boy. How they wanted a baby, and it was the happiest day of their life when their little boy was born. They picked an unusual name for him Charles and Nora created him…so they named him Chandler… Nora said it reminded her of the mystery writer Raymond Chandler. She always knew he was destined for great things because of his special name.

Chandler just wanted his parents to disappear. Why couldn't he have a brother? The other kids were scared of him because he was always in this adult world and because of that he couldn't relate to kids his own age. He had an imaginary playmate, but he claimed even his parents liked him better.

Chandler did have one salvation. It was a rather odd one for an eight year old. He felt more like a little adult than a kid. He would go out behind the stables and light up a cigarette. He would stand there and feel like he was the coolest kid in the world. He did it at school too, that's how he had his pal the janitor . They would sneak outside and smoke far away from the prying eyes of the teachers.

Such bliss came from that little stick. He would breathe in and then he would blow it out in a ring. After his cigarette on this particular day, he walked up the stairs. He had noticed that the houseboy had went in his father's room. Apparently he forgot to shut the door, Chandler walked up to it and then he saw ….

His father was kissing the houseboy….. now his life would never be the same…. In case you were wondering the song is the oldie Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves by Cher

My apologies to you mondlers… I saw Chandler as having this sad life…but I was also trying to bring out why he was the way he is… next chapter ….meet the Tribbianis