(A recap of RAW played showcasing the mock John Cena funeral. It showed all the details, even the music video and ended with Undertaker throwing John Cena into the casket. The fireworks then went off as the camera panned to Michael Cole and Tazz.)
COLE: Evening fans and welcome to SmackDown! just 2 days until Survivor Series!
TAZZ: And I'll tell you Cole, this is going to be one hell of a Survivor Series, so if you people out there haven't ordered it yet, this ain't one to miss.
COLE: That's right, earlier today we found out that were going to have the four Quarterfinal Matches!
TAZZ: And the two semifinal matches will be held at none other than Survivor Series.
NO CHANCE THAT'S WHAT YOU'VE GOT!
(Vince McMahon then came strutting out on stage the fans immediately booing as he slowly strutted into the ring.)
COLE: And there's one loony man, Cena has driven McMahon absolutely crazy. I can't believe McMahon actually had the audacity to hold a John Cena Funeral.
TAZZ: Well you have to believe that McMahon has a personal vendetta against Cena. Vince McMahon is one-hundred percent sure that Cena will be Buried Alive on Sunday.
(Once Vince McMahon got into the ring, he grabbed a microphone.)
MCMAHON: Monday night, we gave witness to the John Cena funeral, where his friends Jindrak, Christian, and Kurt Angle gave their condolences.
COLE: Will he just stop with this whole damn thing? Condolences? They practically bashed John Cena the whole time.
MCMAHON: But of course, the funeral couldn't have been possible without one man.
(The fans began booing louder.)
MCMAHON: One man that will bury Cena alive on Sunday. At this time I'd like to welcome the soon to be WWE Champion, The Undertaker!
(The arena then dimmed and the rampway filled with smoke. Soon after, the Corporate Sell-Out came stepping out on stage, his demonic presence being felt throughout the arena.)
TAZZ: This guy still gives me the goosebumps Cole.
COLE: Well I'll tell you one guy he doesn't give goosebumps, and that's John Cena.
TAZZ: But I'll be willing to bet Cena will be the one taking a dirt-nap.
(The Undertaker soon stepped into the ring as he took a microphone from a stagehand.)
UNDERTAKER: Cena, you wrote a check that your ass can't cash. It's too late now Cena, nothing will save you now. I gave you plenty of time to get out of this Buried Alive match, but all you've done is pissed me off beyond recognition.
TAZZ: Believe me, Undertaker is not the type of guy that you'd want to piss of either.
UNDERTAKER: Cena, I'm not just going to bury you on Sunday, I'm going to make you scream for mercy Cena. I'm going to crush the very life you withhold. Most importantly, I'm going to bring the title back to where it belongs, a wrestler with class and respect.
COLE: You're talking about ending someone's life and you're saying you have class. How hypocritical.
UNDERTAKER: John Cena, I'm going to make you wish you neve…stepped in the ring with me.
YOU'RE TIME IS UP MY TIME IS NOW!
(The Champ John Cena then came out on stage the crowd going wild as he held the championship up high. He eventually was handed a mic.)
CENA: Undertaker! You thought it was real cute to do some of that ghost stuff on Raw huh? I bet you thought you looked cool coming out of that casket and attacking me.
(It was more than apparent that Vince McMahon was growing angry.)
CENA: Taker, let's face the facts, you don't have the balls to face me man to man.
UNDERTAKER: Boy, you better watch that mouth of yours, that's what got you here in the first place.
CENA: I bet you like hearing the sound of your own voice, talking about sacrificing goats on Fridays, having Satanic rituals on Saturdays, playing a game of grab ass on Sundays, but what you and Vince do on your own time is your own thing….
TAZZ: He shouldn't be doing this.
UNDERTAKER: That's all you are Cena, nothing but lip. If you're really as tough as you claim to be, then come down here and get your ass whooped.
CENA: Undertaker, I know how you like to play the numbers game, so I'll tell you what. The Chain Gang has come strapped!
(Batista's music then went off as the Animal came out on stage to a large pop.)
CENA: That's not all either!
I AM A REAL AMERICAN
(Hulk Hogan then came out as he pointed down to the ring.)
CENA: So Taker, McMahon, bring out JBL, bring out Orton and watch them get handled too!
MCMAHON: That's enough dammit, Cena, you're not destroying my Empire, the very Empire that I've spent years on building to perfection.
CENA: That probably explains why XFL didn't go to well.
COLE: Oh man.
(The fans began cheering louder now.)
MCMAHON: So tonight, since your new "buddies" Hulk Hogan and Batista want to be superheroes, then how about this. I'm seeing a Six Man Tag Main Event, Hogan, Batista, and Cena against Randy Orton, JBL, and the Undertaker.
TAZZ: That's going to be one hell of a Main Event.
COLE: I second that.
(Batista pointed to Taker and did his thumbs down taunt as Cena lifted up the WWE Championship, as he, Batista, and Hogan headed backstage.)
COLE: And looks like we have the first match of the Quarter Finals up next, Chris Jericho vs. Eugene.
Y5J
Y4J
Y3J
B Y2J /B
(Jericho then soon after came out on stage to a barrage of boos as he continued down the ramp. He then stepped into the ring and awaited Eugene.)
MATCH 1-U.S. Championship Quarterfinals-Singles
Chris Jericho vs. Eugene
Winner: Chris Jericho
Results: Eugene was getting the best of Jericho, which aggravated Y2J very much. Eugene continued to pretty much get the offense on Jericho, but when he lifted him up, Y2J pulled him close and delivered an unnoticed low blow, then dropped Eugene in a DDT, and then ran to the ropes landing a Lionsault on Eugene getting the pin.
COLE: I can't believe Jericho had to stoop that low to win the match.
TAZZ: Looks like my pick Y2J is advancing to the Survivor Series Semi Final.
COLE: Last week your pick was Dupree and then changed to HBK, now it's Jericho.
TAZZ: Jericho is US Title potential. He's a Rock Star Cole, and only a Rock Star deserves the United States Championship.
(The camera then panned backstage where Josh Matthews was with Chavo Guerrero.)
MATTHEWS: Chavo, last week your Cruiserweight title match with Paul London was undecided.
CHAVO: It's a load of crap Matthews that's what it is, I was stripped of my damn title because I had London in a pinning position. What kind of unfair crap is that? So with that being said, allow me to present a replay of the match, you be the judge Matthews, how did it end?
(The replay showed as Matthews looked on.)
MATTHEWS: Well he did have you in a bridged suplex, but then again his shoulders are on the mat...
CHAVO: Thank you Matthews, finally someone sees what I'm talking about.
MATTHEWS: But then again it seems like his shoulders went down only seconds after the 3 count, it's hard to tell.
CHAVO: Who asked you anyways?
(Chavo took the mic and pushed Matthews away.)
CHAVO: London, you know I pinned you, so why don't you just fess up so I can get my title back.
(London then came out of nowhere as he and Chavo began to brawl. The officials soon came up and broke the scuffle up, as the camera panned back to Cole and Tazz.)
TAZZ: You know Matthews brought up some valid points; it's really hard to tell who pinned who…
COLE: If they have a rematch I won't be complaining. That was one hell of a match.
TAZZ: That's one reason why SmackDown! is the best, the Cruiserweight superstars.
COLE: You said it, well up next we have another great match that's part of the U.S. Championship Quarterfinals, Eddie Guerrero versus Shelton Benjamin.
TAZZ: And talk about a dream match, these two superstars are probably the best athletes on SmackDown!
VIVA LA RAZZA
(The Lowrider soon came driving out on stage and down the ramp as Eddie Guerrero slowly halted in front of the ring. He then stepped out of the car and continued dancing as he slowly slid into the ring and jumped up on the ropes moving his shoulders to the beat of his music.)
AIN'T NO STOPPIN ME NOOO!
(Shelton Benjamin then came out on stage hyping himself up for the match as he continued down the ramp sliding into the ring.)
COLE: Here we go, this is definitely going to be a SmackDown! classic.
MATCH 2-U.S. Championship Quarterfinals-Singles
Eddie Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin
Winner: Shelton Benjamin
Results: Arguably the best match of the night. Guerrero had Benjamin on top of his feet the whole match, Eddie even nailed a Frogsplash but to the surprise of everyone, Benjamin kicked out. The match went on a bit longer, Guerrero kicking Benjamin, but Shelton caught his foot leading to a T-Bone Suplex, Benjamin getting the win.
COLE: What a match.
(After the match, Benjamin and Guerrero shook hands the camera then panned backstage where Matthews was with Chris Benoit.)
MATTHEWS: Firstly Benoit, let me welcome you to SmackDown! in just a few seconds you'll be facing Edge one on one in the U.S. Championship Quarterfinals. Are you ready to make an impact on SmackDown?
BENOIT: Well I've been in the ring with Edge plenty of times on RAW, hell I was even in the Fatal Fourway with him at Thanksgiving Bash.
(Edge then ran up.)
EDGE: Wait a minute, Matthews, what the hell? I didn't get a welcome when I came to SmackDown!. You see, this is the kind of disrespect that I will not tolerate. So Benoit, you better show me some respect.
BENOIT: Respect huh?
EDGE: Yeah, respect!
(Benoit then looked down and then began punching Edge, Edge trying to get some offense in too.)
COLE: And it looks like they're already starting things.
(The battle continued as Edge came stumbling out on the stage, Benoit then tossed him as Edge stumbled down the ramp and slowly crawled up into the ring, Benoit getting in right behind him.)
MATCH 3-U.S. Championship Quarterfinals
Edge vs. Chris Benoit
Winner: Edge
Results: Edge was determined to win by any means necessary, but Benoit remained dominant in the ring. Benoit tossed Edge into the turnbuckle, but Benoit had to catch his breath, the referee making sure he was ok. While the ref was checking, Edge removed the turnbuckle padding and then Benoit ran at him, but Edge moved out of the way, Benoit running headfirst into the exposed corner. Edge then rolled Benoit up and grabbed a handful of tights getting the win.
TAZZ: And my main man Edge is going to Survivor Series.
COLE: Too bad he had to cheat to get there.
(The camera then panned backstage where Shawn Michaels was seen heading to the stage, the crowd popping when they saw him.)
COLE: And the final Quarterfinal match, Rene Dupree and the Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels.
I THINK I'M CUTE, I KNOW I'M SEXY
(HBK then came out on stage, the fans going wild as he continued to taunt for his fans. He then jumped on the apron and stepped into the ring, awaiting Rene Dupree.)
(Rene Dupree soon came out afterwards with a mic in his hands.)
DUPREE: HBK, back on RAW, you probably were the Sexy Boy.
(Dupree then came down closer to the ring.)
DUPREE: But now you're on SmackDown, and no one's sexier than the French Phenom, Renee Dupree!
(The fans began booing.)
DUPREE: You might have the Sweet Chin Music, but you do not have the French Tickler!
(Dupree then began doing to the French Tickler as HBK suicide dived onto Dupree.)
COLE: Oh man!
MATCH 4-U.S. Championship Quarterfinals-Singles
Shawn Michaels vs. Rene Dupree
Winner: Shawn Michaels
Results: Once they got into the ring, Dupree began to get some damage done on HBK, nailing a few set of suplexes, eventually going for the pin, but Michaels kept kicking out. This only set Dupree off more as he lifted up HBK and ran towards the ropes, but when he bounced back, he caught some Sweet Chin Music, HBK then went for the cover getting the 1…2…3.
(After the match, Edge rushed down to the ring where he slid in and began going at it with Michaels. The two continued to exchange punches, but HBK ducked under a punch and then delivered some Sweet Chin Music to Edge.)
COLE: HBK vs. Edge at Survivor Series, definitely going to be a good match.
TAZZ: I'm telling you Cole, Survivor Series is going to be a must see Pay Per View. Benjamin vs. Jericho, Edge vs. HBK, Team JBL vs. Team Batista, Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan.
HEY!
COLE: Speaking of the devil.
(Randy Orton then came out to the ring doing his usual poses in the ring as the crowd began booing.)
(Soon after, JBL's limo came pulling up, his chauffeur stepping out of the drivers seat as he moved to the back opening the door for JBL as he came walking down the ramp.)
TAZZ: There's the man Cole, JBL.
COLE: JBL is a kiss ass, just like The Undertaker, just like Orton, and just like The Devil's Advocate.
(After JBL entered the ring, the lights dimmed and the arena filled with fog as the Deadman, the Undertaker slowly strutted down the ramp and into the ring, the fans chanting Corporate Sell-Out.)
COLE: That's right Undertaker, they're chanting Corporate Sell-Out.
YOU'RE TIME IS UP MY TIME IS NOW!
(The crowd popped as John Cena came rushing out on the stage, holding the WWE Championship in the air.)
COLE: The crowd is on their feet.
(Cena stood at the stage as Batista's music soon came on, Batista getting the same ovation as he came out on stage doing his usual poses.)
I AM A REAL AMERICAN
(Hulk Hogan then came out and got the largest pop, the three of them then rushed down the ring as an all out brawl began, Cena fighting Taker, Batista fighting JBL, and Hogan fighting Orton. Cena and Batista clotheslined both Taker and JBL from the ring while Hogan continued punching on Orton eventually tossing him out of the ring. Batista and Cena then held up their titles in the air as Hogan began taunting, the Six Man Tag beginning.)
MAIN EVENT-Non Title-Six Man Tag
Randy Orton/JBL/The Undertaker vs. John Cena/Batista/Hulk Hogan
(Randy Orton and John Cena started things off once the six man tag, Orton dropping Cena for an armbar, but Cena soon got up and tossed Orton outside of the ring. The brawl soon picked up again as JBL rushed into the ring attacking Cena. This triggered for Batista to step in and take it to JBL beating him in the corner as The Undertaker soon stepped in and Cena up for a Chokeslam, Cena however kicked Taker in the gut and nailed him with a DDT.)
CENA: DDT from Cena!
(Outside of the ring Orton and Hogan continued to go at it, but Hogan eventually tossed Orton back into the ring as the ref tried to get everyone back to their respective sides, the battle between Orton and Cena continuing. Orton began attacking Cena hitting him with some uppercuts, but Cena then came back with a huge shoulder block as he slowly made it to his side tagging in Hogan.)
COLE: Oh man! Hogan and Orton preview here we go.
(Orton looked like he was a bit shocked as Hogan pointed at him and rushed towards him, Orton begged for mercy, but soon caught him by surprise with a thumb to the eye.)
COLE: How cheap was that?
TAZZ: Cheap? That's what I like to call smart.
(Orton then lifted Hogan and slammed his knee into his back with a backbreaker. Orton then went for the pin, but Hogan kicked out at two. Orton continued stomping on Hogan as he soon moved to his corner tagging in Undertaker. As soon as the Undertaker stepped in, he tossed Hogan into the corner and unleashed his fury of punches. Undertaker then stepped back to the opposing corner and nailed Cena with an elbow as he moved back towards Hogan.)
TAZZ: The Undertaker is one of the toughest fighters in the WWE. Cena better keep that in mind on Sunday.
(The Undertaker then tossed Hogan out of the ring and stepped over the ropes where he continued his assault on Hogan. Cena came rushing over tackling Undertaker down and hitting him with some hard rights as the fans popped.)
COLE: Taker better be aware that Cena is a fresh superstar wanting to keep that WWE title.
(JBL came over to Cena lifting him up and tossing him into the ring post, but Batista came out of nowhere nailing JBL with a clothesline. Batista then lifted JBL and tossed him into the ring where the two began battling it out. Orton and Hogan began going at it outside, and John Cena clothesline The Undertaker over the guard rail.)
COLE: It's turned into an all out brawl!
(Batista then tossed JBL into the ropes and nailed his signature Spinebuster. Batista then signaled for the Batista Bomb when out of no where a familiar legend slid in the ring.)
COLE: It's Andre the Giant!
TAZZ: JBL really did get Andre the Giant.
(Andre knocked Batista right off of his feet with a clothesline. Andre then placed one giant hand over Batista's throat and lifted him up with raw power tossing him into the corner.)
COLE: Oh man, look at the power of Andre.
(Andre then ran into the corner and smashed Batista, Batista falling to the ground.)
TAZZ: I've never seen anyone manhandle Batista like this!
(Andre then bounced off the ropes and delivered a hard splash on Batista. Meanwhile, Orton clocked Hogan over the head with the chair, where as Taker and Cena continued duking it out in the crowd.)
TAZZ: I guess the match is over….
(Andre then lifted Batista and tossed him outside of the ring and right in front of the announce table. Andre set Batista's head in between his legs and lifted The Animal up, Tazz and Cole moving away from the table.)
COLE: No no no!
(Andre then powerbombed Batista right through the announce table.)
COLE: Oh my god! The Animal has just been put through the damn announce table.
(Andre then slid back into the ring where he and JBL raised each other's hands in the air as JBL's music went off.)
TAZZ: Batista may be an animal, but Andre is a monster.
COLE: JBL and Orlando Jordan really did get Andre the Giant, I cannot believe this.
TAZZ: And Batista still doesn't have any teammates, I really don't see any chance of survival for The Animal.
COLE: Well we gotta go folks, Survivor Series this Sunday, see you then. I can't believe what just happened…
(The camera panned in on Batista who was out cold, SmackDown! then going off the air.)