Grissom's Revelation
by Sydne

Rating: CSI-I
Summary: Grissom's thoughts at the end of Early Rollout
Disclaimer: All characters belong to CBS and Anthony Zuiker.
Author's Note: I've never tried writing in this format before. All feedback is appreciated

I'm sitting at my desk doing paperwork when Catherine stops by my office doorway.

"Oh…You're still here," she says.

I look up just in time to see her pulling on her jacket over the top of a sequined halter-top. She's dressed to the nines. She's pulled her hair up on top of her head and there are little tendrils floating down to frame her face. God, she's gorgeous.

"So, I'm leaving," she tells me. Then she asks me if I need anything. I tell her that I'm good. The next words out of her mouth surprise me.

"Are we good?"

I take a deep breath and tell her that we'll be fine. Deep down I wonder though. Will we be fine? I hope so.

Her deep throaty voice tells me, "Ok, I'll see you tomorrow."

I can't help but ask, "Going out?" As soon as the words are out of my mouth I want to kick myself. Its obvious she's going out. I just wish she was going out with me. Now that realization surprises me. I never thought of Catherine this way.

"I've got some unfinished business to take care of. I'll see you."

As she walks away from me, I lean back and begin to chew on the arm of my glasses.

"Will we be fine?" I ponder her words. What will it take to make us okay again? I know we have to work on rebuilding our trust again. That will come with time. One thing I know about Catherine, while she may not always make the best decisions, I can trust her with my life. I know she would never do anything to intentionally hurt me. So, why does the idea of her having "unfinished business" hurt so much? I look around the office and realize I don't want to be here any longer. I want the privacy and comfort of my townhouse.

Standing up, I throw my paperwork into my briefcase and head to my car. I get into my Mercedes and start the engine. The stereo begins to play and Vivaldi filters through the speakers. I begin to relax as I wind my way through the early morning traffic. When I arrive at my townhouse, the first thing I do is head for the kitchen. I need a stiff drink. I reach into the cupboard, pull down a glass and grab the scotch from above the refrigerator. I pour myself a drink and take a sip. I want to get drunk and forget tonight's conversation with Catherine. Taking a large gulp of the scotch I feel it burn as it glides down my throat. I walk over to the CD player and hit the power button. Carmen fills the room. Ahh, I love Carmen. I move to the couch as the opera washes over me. Sitting down, I pull off my jacket and kick off my shoes. I lean my head back against the soft brown leather.

As much as I don't want them too, my thoughts keep returning to Catherine. I wonder what her unfinished business was. Oh hell, I know what her unfinished business is. I just don't want to admit it to myself. She's on a date. Damn, I haven't been on one of those in ages. I need to get out. Who am I kidding? The one person I'd like to go out with has no interest in me. Catherine prefers men with a rougher edge. Not some science geek like me. She likes men who are into rock music. Hell, I like classical and opera. It would never work. Even if I thought I'd stand a chance, I know she wouldn't like my body. She likes her men mean and lean. I'm definitely not that. God, this is pathetic.

Finishing off the drink, I decide I want another. I return to the CD player and turn the volume up louder. One nice thing about working nights, I can play my stereo as loud as I want during the day and the neighbors don't complain. Going to the kitchen, I fix myself a drink and peer into the refrigerator. Nothing looks good to eat. I slam the door and wander back to the couch. I still can't get Catherine off my mind. Shaking my head, I decide not to sit and begin to pace the room. Thoughts of her body begin to enter my mind. I shouldn't be thinking this way. She's my best friend. Damn! I finish the second drink in one quick gulp. Now, that the images have entered my mind, I can't get rid of them. I can picture her under me, writhing and calling my name. FUCK! I want her so bad and I know I can't have her. I can feel my body reacting to the images my mind is conjuring up and it mortifies me.

I return to the kitchen. This time I don't bother with the niceties of a glass. I grab the bottle of scotch and head back to my couch. Sitting down, I take another swig from the bottle. I want the alcohol to blot out the images I'm seeing. I don't want to feel this way about my best friend. Ah, he alcohol is beginning to kick in and I'm starting to feel warm and fuzzy. Laying down on the couch, I know I'm going to dream of Catherine tonight. As good as this makes me feel it horrifies me at the same time. My final thought as I drift off to sleep is that I want Catherine.

Finis