Harry sat silently, clutching his wrist with such ferocity that Madam Pomfrey had to pry his fingers off. He let Professor McGonagall's words drift over him like high tide; there was just no sense in it. He was drowning and couldn't come up for air.
The transfiguration teacher cleared her throat just as Madam Pomfrey began the incantation to heal his wrist. "Remus was on a stake out, of sorts, near a Death Eater hideout. All we know is that one moment we had his signal clear as day and the next it was gone." She took another deep breath. "It is most likely," she paused, "that he has been compromised."
Harry blanched, staring down at his already healing wrist. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly, trying to relieve the on coming migraine that was forming between his eyes. "Well, do you know where this hideout is?"
"Yes, but by the time a team was dispatched, the house had been destroyed- nothing but a pile of ruble. They've obviously transferred him to a different location. They'll have known we were tracking him, that's the only explanation for his lost signal. Who knows how long it will be before we're able to pick it up again."
His blood boiled. "The full moon is next Friday! We have to go after him!"
"We will do no such thing!" The professor snapped quickly, her eyes stern. "We hope to reach Mr. Lupin before the full moon becomes a problem. The Order will continue its investigation and keep you apprised. Do you understand?" There was silence. "Am I making myself clear, Potter?"
"Hope," he spat viciously. "Hope is for dreamers, and dreams are for fools, if you'll excuse me." Harry charged out of the hospital wing, ears turned deaf to Madam Pomfrey's protests.
The endless horizon of grass that was the Hogwarts grounds was tinged with a blend of pink and green and Harry knew it must have been some tint that had not yet been given a name.
As he sat heavily on the uneven terrain, Harry watched as the gleaming red sun sizzling on the shores of the Great Lake reflecting both the eerie calmness and burning fire that had settled in the pit of his gut.
Harry knew his words to Professor McGonagall were harsh and most likely out of line, but as he skipped a pebble across the pink water he found he didn't care anymore. If Dumbledore could tell an eleven year old that it didn't do to dwell on dreams, then the same could be said for hope and Harry refused to play the ignorant child any longer. He was done playing the pawn.
The fact was Remus would most likely never return and Harry had just lost his final connection to his parents. It was the bitter irony of the world and he refused, damn it, refused to let it weaken him.
This wasn't about him any longer, it was never about him, and it was time to face it. Harry may not allow himself to be Dumbledore's pawn any longer, but he was no fool, he was still the Queen in this seemingly never ending war.
The clearly stated Prophecy allowed him no room for hope, and Harry had never been one to ask for things he wouldn't receive. It was his philosophy at the Dursley's and it was as true now. One thing he would never receive was mercy and Harry was willing to bet neither would Remus Lupin.
As the skies opened up and the last of day's light disappeared off the horizon, the seemingly clear day clouded and a relentless rain poured from its depths, weeping for the boy who would never weep for himself.
Harry Potter walked through Hogwarts Castle, which was dark from the overcast night just past its glass windows. He paid no attention to his sopping robes or to the empty Great Hall from which dinner had already come and gone. If the corridors had not been deserted and if a stray student had been roaming the halls, they would have seen not a boy but a man too lost in the troubles of a world, troubles no person should have to live with.
But Harry was alone and no one was there to see his suffering. Even as he stepped through the portrait hole into the warm common room, he still felt frozen and indifferent, although that could have come from the wet clothes he donned. His chills seemed to ease just slightly as Ginny wrapped her arms around him.
"Harry, where have you been? I was so worried. Look at you, you're soaked." She pulled away from her compulsive grooming only to look into his eyes. She drew her hand gently down the side of his face, and before he could cool off she was clutching him again and kissing him with such ferocity he momentarily forgot he existed.
"Oy!" Ron yelped. Harry hadn't noticed him before. He was sitting near the fireplace in front of Hermione, who was curled up in an armchair. He spoke again, "Come on, Gin, we don't need to see that."
Hermione kicked Ron unabashedly and rose to her feet. Her arms were crossed and she was starring at Harry ferociously, his arms still wrapped around Ginny. Her eyes were penetrating him and she missed nothing. "What happened, Harry?"
Harry pulled away from Ginny with cool apathy. "Remus, he uh," he cleared his throat. "He's missing. They think he was captured near a Death Eater hideout while on a mission."
Harry vaguely recalled Ron's eyes falling shut. Ginny leaned against him again and Hermione's eyes immediately lost their intensity. "Oh, Harry, I'm so sorry. But," she hesitated, "You're not going to go after him, are you?"
Ron and Ginny simultaneously gasped, "Hermione!" but Harry threw out a hand to silence them.
"No Hermione. I think I learned my lesson the last time my 'saving people' complex got in the way. I'm going to bed."
Monday could find Harry in classes just like any other day, any other day that any other student would enjoy. The weather had remained stormy from the previous night and continued in its onslaught, unmerciful in its reminder of the prior evening.
Care of Magical Creatures was canceled due to the inclement weather and he, Ron, and Hermione stayed in the common room in a sort of subdued silence. Harry had been hoping to avoid more stares. As much in the past as it may have seemed to him, the Daily Prophet article was still the main gossip in the Hogwarts' halls, but he couldn't escape it in the common room either, apparently.
To Harry's great annoyance it seemed Colin and Dennis Creevy were desperate to have an interview with him; they had actually gotten a tip from Luna Lovegood that he might be willing to discuss the Dursleys with a more reliable reporter.
"Not bloody likely!" Harry snapped as Colin once again inquired about a discussion, with Dennis holding the camera eagerly behind him.
"But Harry, we thought that after the Quibbler article you'd be more willing to speak to the press."
"No Creevy! That Quibbler article was for the good of the wizarding community and this has nothing to do with the wizarding community at all. It's my life and you just need to back off."
"But-"
"Leave Colin!" Ron snapped rising out of his chair menacingly. The brothers were gone before Ron was standing.
Transfiguration was spent studying animagus, in theory only of course. This left Harry with little more on his mind than Remus. How could he think of anything else but the maurauders' sacrifice for their werewolf friend? He might as well not have gone to Charms for all the good it did.
"Potter!" Harry startled back to awareness as Snape's voice penetrated his senses. It was early Tuesday morning and Harry was suffering Double Potions. "Potter, I asked you a question!"
Harry wasn't fool enough nor feeling obligated to care anything about potions at the moment and he felt no need to disguise it. "What was that, Professor?" He heard several students gasp at his nonchalant tone.
"I asked you Potter," Snape said, his nostrils flaring evermore. "What is the key ingredient of the Wolfsbane potion? Or is this particular topic reminding you all the more of your little friend?"
The truth was Harry assumed on some subconscious level that he truly was ignoring Snape's monologue on the Wolfsbane potion for that very reason, but that didn't stop his temper from rising any less.
"Answer the question Potter," The Potion's master continued, looming ever closer by the moment. "Or are you too busy drowning in self pity to finally admit to yourself you've lost another dog?"
A string in Harry broke with such ease that when he reflected on it later he realized it must have been a long time coming. "You bastard," Harry whispered so quietly he was amazed the rest of the class heard it, but it was obvious they did by the sudden outbreak in whispers and the touch of Hermione's hand on his shoulder.
"Just because you spent the majority of your childhood being hounded by my father gives you no right to take it out on me like you've done for the past five and a half years, but I've tolerated it with some amount of decorum which sure as hell can't be said for you!
"I know for a fact Remus never participated in my dad and Sirius' little game. I know he didn't do anything to stop it either, but neither did you. You didn't have the guts to face him and you certainly proved your cowardice by still fighting them in their grave where they can't fight back. How very mature of you, Professor. But I'll be damned if you'll do the same to Remus."
There was silence for what may have seemed a second to an outsider but to Harry and his greasy haired Professor that statement held for an eternity. He knew he'd crossed the line but so had Snape and as far as Harry was concerned the score was even and he was happy no matter how many detentions it cost him.
Snape's lips were in such a tight quiver he was amazed the Professor could speak at all. "Detention, Potter, for as long as it takes to trim the Whomping Willow." The man smirked. "Class dismissed!"
The next day Harry sat with a cup of coffee in his hand and an essay in the other. He was in study hall in the common room and continually rereading the ridiculous title for his latest History of Magic assignment.
How do you think Harry Potter got his name into the Goblet of Fire?
Harry was desperately aching to write Before you set a prompt Professor Binns, how about you get you facts straight and make sure said prompt is even remotely accurate? But you've never been one who was much for details have you?
After a moment's deliberation, he did just that. Harry certainly didn't need to pass this class for any future career he would possibly consider and he was just too flipping tired to care.
Harry was tired because the fact was he had decided not to let Snape ruin Gryffindor's chances at the house cup such as he had let Umbridge and had set off for the Whomping Willow right after class.
He'd prodded the knot at the base of the tree with a long stick lying near by and had promptly pruned his heart out. Harry had trimmed that blasted tree until four in the morning and his hand were greatly paying for it now.
The last thing he wanted was to disappoint the Gryffindor team anymore and he refused to miss tonight's practice because of a detention.
Harry flexed his hand at the cramp he had just received from writing those few lines. Looking around the common room, several of his classmates gave him thumbs up. He'd been receiving congratulations on his verbal duel with Professor Snape since early yesterday morning.
Ron's exact words were: "Bloody Hell!" Harry was certain his friend would have fainted if he weren't celebrating in a jubilated dance. Hermione didn't even have the heart to reprimand him and Ginny had given him his best reward as far as he was concerned, a proper snogging.
Thinking of this caused Harry to sit up from his chair and glance to the portrait hole once more. Ginny was not in the common room as she usually was during study hall. He knew she was supposed to be heading down to the Great Hall with Luna to study for OWLS but that didn't make him miss her any less.
"Harry mate," Ron yelled jumping down the stairs, "Study hall's over. Early Quidditch Practice for us! I've got your broom now let's get down to the pitch." Ron eagerly handed Harry his Firebolt and he followed his friend out the portrait hole.
"Oh Joy," Harry whispered under his breathe, but the truth was he was dying to be up in the air again.
Once on the pitch it became obvious they were one short. "Where the bloody hell is Ginny?" Ron asked, as if missing the sanctity of Quidditch Practice was the highest sin.
"She had Potions today, Ron." Harry remembered. "With Snape teaching she probably got a detention."
Ron begrudged a shrug in agreement. "But so help me, if she's not prepared for our next game…" He left the sentence hanging ominously.
Harry and Ron returned to the common room four hours later, hot and sweaty. The beginning of a feeling he couldn't quite describe was starting to form in the pit of his stomach as he opened the portrait hole and saw no Ginny in sight. He tried to restrict his ever-increasing panic.
"Colin!" Harry yelled, quickly crossing the room to the fifth year. "Colin, did you see Ginny in Potion's today?"
"Sure." The boy blinked up at him owlishly; Harry very rarely sought him out.
"Did she get a detention or anything?" He asked. Harry vaguely recognized Ron was standing behind him, listening intently.
"No, she didn't get in trouble or anything, but I haven't seen her since then. We split up since she has Care of Magical Creatures and I have Herbology…" Colin had continued to talk but Harry didn't hear another word; he and Ron had dashed up the stairs to their dormitory.
Harry quickly fell to his knees in front of his trunk, hands searching desperately. Ron watched with confused eyes. He pulled out a small circular mirror, the one that connected him indefinitely with her.
"Ginny Weasley!" Harry said sharply, watching his reflection disappear. He watched as a foggy image appeared. It showed an image that appeared to be tilted on its side, forcing Harry to tilt it to see correctly.
His eyes scanned the picture. Harry saw the dirty floor. In fact, it might not have been a floor at all, just dirt compacted together to serve the same purpose. It looked like a sort of ghetto storeroom. Not far from his viewing point was a crate of glass eyeballs. A sudden movement caught his eye: a door on the far left had begun to creep open and the image faded away.
"No, dammit!" Harry yelled at the mirror. "Ginny Weasley!" He continued to stare at his own reflection. He looked up at his best friend's pale face. An eerie calm had begun to sweep over him. "Ron, I think she's been taken. We have to go to Dumbledore-"
Harry was cut off from any further explanation as the dorm door swung open with a loud bang as it hit the stone wall behind it. Hermione stood at the threshold, her face flushed and her hair flying. "Harry, come quick," she was breathless. "It's Remus, he's back."
The end is near, can you feel it? I can, but you might not be able to because you're not one of the little people that lives in my brain. I'm not positive if I will be finished before Half Blood Prince but I have faith you'll all stick with me. I just hope it won't change my outlook too much. As always, thanks to my beta, FormelyKnownAsErin, who will coincidently will not be in town next week. So, I will try and review chapter 17 by myself and you can just receive it more botched, per say.
Thanks as always to: Cynthia1850 (thanks for responding), shade-of-lily, charl1e, Gogglehead Lover, Suicidal Bunnies, angel74, Tondo-the-house-elf, supernove8610.
Mistress of the Eternal Night: Hey I totally sympathize!
Mimbulus: As much as that first part of your review might have disturbed me, I greatly appreciate it, lol. I love your view on the things Bill was going through, you have it bang on. Love your reviews, and please continue. Many thanks!
SophiaBlondie: Miss you tons girl! Anyway love the review; I really appreciate shock and awe.
Harryahocmoh: that is a totally complicated screen name; I know I got it wrong, lol. I love keeping you in suspense.
Bujiana: Your review meant so much to me, despite it's dark twist, lol. I'm glad that people understand the pressure Harry's going through that I try to convey.
Takingthistoyourgrave: that is so wonderful; I love your animated description. Now which homepage was it? Lol
Larna Mandrea: I'm glad you kept reading too. I really didn't want to lose readers but I'm going with this the way I choose and thanks for you support.
Jenn the Freak: oh, I'm sure I love your reviews just as much as you do my story, especially the last one. I love when people tell me specifically what they thought and I really love your description of the article. Could you give me the title to your fic? I'd love to check it out. Thanks again!