PIKAÜBER, it's you and "me."
Angelas! AWK!
I like ice cream!
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So anyway, Ash put his jacket back on and they walked into the gym. About time! TT
BUT WAIT!
"What th-- there's no one here!" Ash yelled.
Misty sighed. "Oh well. I guess we'll have to go into some lighthouse filled with people that happen to be Pokemon trainers, and cure some Pokemon of a disease."
"…What?" said the Brock.
Ash shrugged. "Well, I guess we have to head out to—"
Someone ran into the gym and crashed. Then they tried actually using the door.
"SORRY! SORRY!" they screamed. "I had to get the groc— Pokemon supplies! Yes! POKEMON SUPPLIES!"
"Nervous geek."
"Shut up, Misty." (Brock)
"Wait…" It took a minute to kick in for Ash's little pea-brain. "CINDER? But you said this was a non-self insertion story!"
"Well, I lied." Cinder replied.
"Where the gym leader, you friend?" Ash yelled.
"Don't you mean fiend, Ash?"
"…DAMMIT!"
"No cussing, Ash. I want to keep this at a K+. Did you see what I did with Gary a week or so ago?"
"Yes'm."
"Now, the real gym leader is under this white sheet."
"Uh… why?" asked Brock.
"I didn't want him to get all frosty in the snow. Now, here… HE IS!" Cinder yanked the cover off with a dramatic flair. Under the sheet was a young boy, trembling from the cold (probably due to the fact he was wearing shorts), a rookie trainer. Cinder left the scene in a flash of fire, but not before a quick showing of the middle finger.
"…" said everyone. The boy gulped.
"I FORFEIT!" he screamed suddenly. He then broke into tears and ran out the door. A door built into the ceiling opened up, spewing confetti and balloons everywhere, including in the mix… the Mineral Badge! It rocketed down towards the ground, but hit Ash (who was staring at the ceiling as if in a trance) in the eye.
"Ouch!" Ash yelled. "Ohh… a badge!" He took the thin metallic badge out of his eye (luckily it had landed horizontally, so there were no real damages). Ash yet again let loose a psychedelic background behind him. "YEAAAAH! I GOT THE MINERAL BADGE!" he screamed.
"Ash, no one cares." Misty said.
"Aww."