Chapter Seven: Pieces of You
Inuyasha's heart was pulled in so many directions. "Kagome…all those years I ago, I made a mistake…"
Kagome looked away and dragged a hand through her mussed hair. Her voice was a faint whisper. "No you didn't."
"Yeah you're right," he answered then muttering under his breath, "as usual". As much as it pained him to admit it, he knew she was never meant for his world.
Kagome frowned at this but then gave into a slow smile. "Haven't changed much have you?"
"Just for the worst." He sat on the leather ottoman facing Kagome, leaning forward towards her with his hands on his knees staring at the floor.
"But what I did… was the hardest thing I've ever done. Kikyo wasn't meant to stay; she was never long for this world. I guess someone as holy and unattached as she was will always have an early calling. And you were never supposed to be there. Those girls of yours wouldn't have been born back there…life is brutal…it's not like here…" His voice dropped off, why am I telling her what she already knows?
Kagome said nothing. Ayumi was a breach birth and eight weeks premature; Kagome lost a dangerous amount of blood and today this was hard but manageable. In the Feudal era it was certain death. After all even Sesshomaru's hated sword of life was fallible. It didn't always fulfill it's promise of wringing life from the edge of death. Rumor had it that Kagura had learned this the hard way.
Kagome's lust drained from her body leaving behind only fatigue. "What we do now?"
He gave a low cynical laugh, "To hell if I know. I've never been able to figure that one out."
She touched her fingertips to his cheek. Inuyasha looked up, met her eyes and put his hand over hers. "You have more than you realize Inuyasha. You have a son."
His eyes brightened, "Yeah I do, and he's a great kid…" Inuyasha paused after these words; after all they were sitting in the middle of his son's destructive handiwork. "I need to be there for him and teach him more."
She nodded. "And you are always welcome back here, once you have Taro under control."
Inuyasha dropped his eyes and shook his head. "Kagome you are too much sometimes."
She tossed back, "What is that supposed to mean?" And for a moment it felt like old times.
He leaned back in the chair and answered nonchalantly, "All you ever do is give. Sometimes too much giving is selfish." He raised his voice unexpectedly, "Ya ain't a fucking martyr! So drop the act."
Kagome stood with her hands clenched in fists, her arms by her sides intending to yell down at him. But she stopped, raised her brows then shrugged. "Maybe you're right."
Inuyasha's expression of shock was priceless and Kagome regret not knowing where the digital camera was. "Can you repeat whatever it is you just said?" He held a clawed hand up to his fuzzy ear. "I missed that."
She knew damn well he'd heard her perfectly, after all his hearing was so keen he could probably hear her heart beating. She yelled in her loudest voice and was amused when she saw him wince. Serves ya right. "I SAID, I THINK YOU ARE RIGHT!"
He screwed up his face and looked away, "Gods Kagome! Say it don't spray it." Inuyasha held a hand over his face in mock panic.
Kagome ignored his ridiculous gesture and sat back down. I know he learned that one from Souta. "I do think too much. I should just ask Hojo what's going on."
Inuyasha's eyes narrowed, "What the fuck? Is he hurting you?" His hand itched to lay pain on a certain flimsy excuse of a mortal husband.
She decided to be honest. "He's been, well busy and yesterday I got this call. It really looked like he might have another woman."
He reached for her putting both hands on Kagome's shoulders. "No. Let me help… This can't be how I leave you. You can still come back with me. I still care so much…"
Kagome sniffled, "I know. But I've no solid proof of this and it's my fault for letting us drift apart. He's a good man."
Inuyasha muttered, "Yeah whatever. If you say so."
"We will work through this and I will do whatever I have to. But you're right Inuyasha. It's time to stop playing the victim and take charge."
He was impressed. She'd gotten all of that from what he'd said? His chest puffed up slightly, he was wiser than he'd realized. He looked on his Kagome with new eyes. She was older but still a vision. But she was so damned tired and thin. He knew she ate. Hell he'd seen her eat, but it never seemed to stick to her.
Inuyasha stood and offered her his hand. Kagome looked up at him. "Kagome… let me get you in bed."
Her face flushed as her eyes widened. "You changed you mind?"
He leered at her. "I'd love that but I haven't changed my mind. I meant you look like so…tired." He crossed his arms and held his nose in the air, the way he used to whenever he caught her in the wrong, as though he was offended she'd questioned his honorable intentions.
Kagome was almost disappointed. Was it possible to be flooded with both relief and disappointment at the same time? "Okay."
Then she added, "Cause you do realize, such flattery will get you nowhere."
He took her hand and they climbed the creaky old stairs. She realized he was leading her to her old room and she had to pull him towards the master bedroom door. "No that's Ayumi's now."
"Oh." He's almost forgotten about the girls. She pushed open the one door he'd never entered, the one leading to the master bedroom.
Inuyasha swept Kagome up in his arms and deposited her in the middle of her unmade bed. The one she shared with Hojo. He pulled off his outer red fire rat kimono jacket, wrapped her in it and slipped in beside her.
Kagome lifted her head as his arm slid under it and he pulled her against his chest. His lips pressed briefly to the back of her neck. "Try and get some sleep. I'll stay with you."
"Inuyasha?" Why? Why are you doing this?
He hushed her and she gave in and closed her eyes. "Thank you, for understanding."
Kagome fell over the edge into sleep and heard in the distance the soft whisper. "I've always loved you too…stupid wench."
----
Hojo stood at the bus station waiting for the other passengers to depart so he could climb on and find a seat. The car he'd driven to the airport Friday afternoon was still in its rented parking space. When Hojo tried the ignition, the engine sputtered and refused to turn over. He noticed the gas gauge, that had read full when he left the car, now displayed a big red E for empty.
Damnit! Someone had stolen his gas, just siphoned it from the tank. Probably in broad daylight under right under the rent a cop's nose. He called airport security and was told it would take the best part of two hours before they could assist him. That's when he decided to take the bus. Hojo hated traveling. It meant staying in strange hotels and time away from his girls and Kagome.
He held his trusty carry on bag in one hand and a long thin box under his other arm. The contents of the box was priceless and after he'd been forced to check it at the luggage counter; he'd spent the whole flight chewing his nails, a habit Kagome detested, worried they'd lose the box. But now he was climbing the steps to the bus, the box held securely under his arm.
---
Hokkaido, the new senior advisor to the partners of Hojo's firm, was a great collector of antiques and all sorts of miscellaneous history.
He saw the framed pictures carefully arranged on Hojo's desk and found the young man's wife to be beautiful and his girls a mischievous kind of adorable.
Hojo never hesitated to do whatever the company asked of him and Hokkaido knew his family suffered for it. As thanks for Hojo's latest idea, one that saved the company well over five million dollars, Hokkaido decided to present Hojo with a gift from his private collection. It was a true honor and even though he'd only know Hojo a short time, he knew of no other man he'd rather bestow it on.
In all honesty the relic was damaged. It was scratched and it's blade well beyond any amount of sharpening. The museums had declined it; they already had walls of such items from the same time period all in pristine condition.
Hokkaido was getting older and the pleasure of ownership wasn't what it used to be. He now enjoyed giving more than receiving. Hokkaido was ecstatic to learn Hojo was living in the Higurashi shrine as he owned a relic from the Shrine's distant path. He waited until Hojo had successful secured the client's contract and presented it to him.
"Thank you Hokkaido-sama …you have no idea what this will mean to my wife. She's the keeper of the shrine's history." The broken and dull sword lay reverently across the young man's open palms.
Hokkaido smiled and felt the seal of his false teeth almost give…all day hold, what a crock! "Wonderful. I am glad to know this will be treasured and not under glass or in a dusty box where no one will appreciate it"
----
Hojo took his seat on the bus and held the box between his knees.
The bus arrived at the shrine twenty minutes later and once again he hauled both his luggage and the box down the narrow bus aisle then down the steps. Once his feet touched the sidewalk at the foot of the shrine steps, he knew he'd done the right thing.
It amazed him how quickly the shrine had become home to him. The apartments they'd lived before were nice but this was a true home. It had character and everywhere he looked brought to mind some long forgotten memory. Kagome when she'd be so frequently sick back in Junior high and he'd come to visit her; and their wedding, which had been held in the garden.
Today he was so glad to be back, even that creepy God tree was a welcome sight. Kagome loved that tree though he wasn't sure why. It gave him the willies but he'd never admit it. It was embarrassing; a grown man apprehensive about a simple tree but it spoke to him in a way that he was afraid to hear. The tree called to Hojo, inviting him to climb it branches and give in to a simple embrace of it's trunk. It reminded more of a woman than a tree and when he stared at for long periods of time he felt as though he'd done something wrong.
Today Hojo smiled at the tree and noticed it lacked some of it's usual foreboding. He passed the well house and found the door open. It swung freely in the wind, slamming against the side of the tiny house.
Hojo frowned, That's odd, she hates that stupid well. He picked up his pace now anxious to see his family. The front door was locked, and he thought that was a good sign.
He pulled out his keys and let himself into the kitchen. The cupboard doors hung crocked from bent hinges. What the hell?
He stepped into the living room and his heart climbed from his chest to his throat where it began beating wildly. The place was a wreck. All the furniture was shredded. DVDs were strewn across the carpet and the curtains lay in a puddle in the floor. One heavy wooden chair lay on its side. The girl's aren't strong enough to do this.
He strained listening for any sign of his family and heard nothing. Oh shit, we've been robbed. The door was locked so maybe he's still here. Hojo saw a brown, leather bag lying in the floor at his feet.
Kagome's purse…she's here still here, somewhere.
Hojo never owned a gun or any kind of weapon. He wasn't fond of them and there was always the fear the girls would find it. Today he regretted this decision. His hand fumbled as he picked up the phone and heard no dial tone. He began reaching for his cell when he hard a crash upstairs.
No time for the phone…I've gotta act now.
He only had one item that could even remotely pass as weapon. He picked up the box and began ripping at the packing tape. Please Hokkaido-sama forgive me for this but my family is more important than any ancient antique.
Once the box was open he turned it upside down and out slid the worn hilt of the battered katana sword. Even in the waning light of the afternoon sun, the sword was obviously damaged past the point of repair. Hopefully whoever was upstairs with his wife wouldn't realize this.
Hojo pulled the sword free and tossed aside its box. He held it in one hand as he quietly edged up the stairs. The hilt was unnaturally warm as if he'd been holding it for hours. And it was surprisingly light. He glanced at the blade noticing it was much thicker than he'd remembered. He had no time to examine the sword because every moment counted. He just barely heard the sounds of footsteps, over the pounding of his own heart.
He reached the foot of the steps and peered cautiously around the door into the bedroom. Kagome lay across the bed, her black hair in a pool over the unmade covers. He couldn't tell if she was asleep or injured. Hojo took a deep breath and charged into the room brandishing the sword.
"Where are you? Show yourself now!"
The bedroom window stood open and the bamboo blinds blew in the breeze.
Kagome sighed and sat up rubbing her head mumbling. "Inuyasha put that away…" Then she blinked and saw her husband holding the glowing Tetsusaiga. Waves of heat fell from the blade and even across the room she felt it on her skin. "Hojo? Where did you find that…?"
He rushed to her, oblivious of the change in the katana. "Are you okay? Is someone here?"
Kagome didn't have to look, to know Inuyasha was gone. The sheets beside her were cool. She looked down and was surprised to see she was still wrapped in his red haori. "I'm fine, I just fell down and needed to rest."
"Have you been downstairs?"
She nodded, "Yeah. some kid vandalized our living room."
"Have you called the cops?" Hojo's free hand ran down her right arm and he rejoiced in finding her unharmed.
Kagome frowned, "No, not yet. I didn't feel good."
Hojo dropped the sword, sat beside her on the bed and pulled her into his arms. He pressed his nose into her hair. "Gods I'm so glad you're okay. For a moment there…"
He noticed the fire rat haori. "Is that a costume for the girls?"
She shook her head. "I found it, it's very old."
"I love the red, it's great." He held it in his hands then passed it back to her.
Kagome remembered the reason for her headache. "We need to talk."
Hojo's heart fell, nothing good had ever happened after a woman uttered those three words. "Yeah?"
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Why did you book a room at that fancy roykan without me?" Even the sight of the glowing sword and its implications weren't enough to make her forget his possible betrayal.
Hojo frowned and asked, "How did you find out about that?"
Kagome's blood began to slow in her veins, so it was true. "The credit card company called to verify the purchase." She said it softly looking away from his face.
Hojo cursed under his breath, "Damn it! You weren't supposed to find out about that."
"Find out what Hojo? What the hell is going on here?" She balled the coarse red material of Inuyasha's haori in her fist.
He said simply, "Our tenth anniversary. It was a surprise."
"What?" Kagome stared at him.
Hojo took her hands in his, "On the plane the other day I realized how far we've drifted apart. Hell, some days I don't even talk to you. You're in bed when I get home and I'm gone by the time you wake up. I've left raising the girls on your shoulders. You organize everything."
Hojo studied Kagome's shiny face and took a deep breath, "I'd die without you but I've been neglecting you. We can't go on this way, so I'm making changes. We are going out more often and I'm starting it off with a week's vacation. Just you and me, no girls, no work just us. It'll be like those road trips we took back in college. Except now we aren't dirt poor."
She shamed her self by breaking down into uncontrollable tears. "You still love me…"
He was confused. "I've never stopped. What did you think there was someone else?"
Kagome glanced away and Hojo laughed. "There will never be anyone else for me. Even if you died I don't think I could let you go." For some reason Kikyo's face flashed though Kagome's head. Then a rush of horror followed. What did I almost do? Oh thank the Gods Inuyasha pulled back. I was so close…to throwing everything away. How could I have known I've always had everything I've ever wanted right here?
Guilt rained down on her and she decided to focus on something besides her mistake. "Where did you get that sword?"
Hojo picked up the battered katana from the floor. It was once again scratched and beaten. "It was a gift from Hokkaido-sama. It supposedly belonged to the Inu protector of this shrine. The one you told me about. Hokkaido-samahad it in his collection and wanted it to go back home to the shrine where it belongs, with you."
Kagome ran her fingers across the dull blade. It was the same sword she'd pulled free from the stone inside the bones of Inuyasha's great yokai father. She remembered feeling like King Arthur for a moment until she saw the cruel determination in Sesshomaru's eyes and was filled with a fear that locked her knees beneath her. It was amazing to hold it in her hands once again and know it was hers. Maybe it was always meant to belong to her.
Hojo surprised her by knocking the sword from her hands. It fell to the wooden floor where it landed with a clang! The man Kagome knew wouldn't have carelessly tossed aside his sword or a relic. She was intrigued in a way she hadn't felt in years.
He pressed his lips to her throat and nipped gently. Kagome responded by wrapping her arms around his necks.
Hojo whispered against her skin, "You are my Goddess and I intend to see you worshipped accordingly."
Kagome laughed and let him press her down into the mattress, "Why wait?"
---
Three hours later Hojo took the damaged sedan to pick up Ayumi and Miya, leaving Kagome to repair the lock on the well house.
The brisk short walk to the well house was nothing. Now that she knew all of the well's secrets and the depths of her own heart, there was no reason to dread the tiny house. Kagome opened the door and stepped inside. Her sandals smacked against the cool wooden plank floor and she wasn't surprised to see a silver haired man perched on the well's edge.
Inuyasha was staring into the well, his head hung forward, his long hair lying hiding his expression.
Kagome cleared her throat and held out her hands. He looked up and saw she was holding his red haori, freshly laundered and folded.
He shook his head at the sight of his precious red armor. "Keep it."
She smiled bravely, "I don't need this anymore, but you will. What will you do when it rains?"
He snorted, "I'm only half human, I ain't afraid of the rain."
"I know you're not." Kagome answered softly and remembered Hojo never carried an umbrella either. Inuyasha leaned forward and accepted his red outer coat and she was relieved.
Inuyasha pulled on his haori and turned to face the well with his back to Kagome. "Kinda funny isn't it?"
She pushed a loose strand of hair away from her eyes, "What is it Inuyasha?"
His head tilted up as he studied the ceiling. "This whole mess… All those years you kept telling me what you wanted. And I couldn't see past my own nose."
Inuyasha dropped his head and hid his hands in his long red sleeves. "Now I know how it feels to be pushed aside…"
He swung around to face her, "Damnit Kagome, I never knew it hurt this bad. Why didn't you ever tell me?" His face was tear stained and Kagome's breath slowed. This was the second time she'd ever seen him cry.
"I did tell you but you didn't want to listen." It was all she could say. The she sighed, "But this isn't about revenge. Please don't think that."
His golden eyes sparked when they met hers, "I know you too well to think that."
Kagome lowered her chin, "Thank you." She reached for his hand but he held it at his side refusing her touch. Inuyasha, don't you see? This isn't an ending it's only the beginning. I wished I'd known that when you chose Kikyo, then I wouldn't have wasted all that time."
"Kagome, I'm so sorry…"
She pressed her fingertips to his lips and hushed him, "You are alone now, but it won't always be that way. Please know this, in the future we get it right. I can only hope that's enough for you now. But fourteen years ago, you made the right decision. Thank you so much for that."
She dropped her hand and waited for his answer.
He said nothing.
Then he lifted a black brow. "It's that stupid husband of yours isn't it?"
A lump formed in Kagome's throat so she just nodded.
Inuyasha groaned and shook his head. "Fucking hell, I should've kicked his ass when I had the chance years ago…"
He stomped his bare heel into the ground then suddenly looked up at Kagome. "Did you hate Kikyo this much?"
Her heart clenched and she answered honestly, "Only when she was touching you."
He grinned feeling oddly satisfied, "Be happy and safe Kagome."
Kagome's soul lifted at the sight of his sincere smile. "Walk with the Gods Inuyasha."
He gave her one last long look, the breeze lifted his hair back from neck and his eyes flashed. Then with one great yokai leap he was down the well and gone from her world.
Kagome sat on the wood steps and rested her chin on her knuckles trying to come to terms with the last three days. A soft knock came at the well house door.
"Room for one more?"
She answered, "Yes."
Hojo sat beside her and in silence they watched the well. He lifted his arm, wrapped it around her shoulder and pulled her to him. "You know I'm glad I never gave up on you."
She laid her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. "You couldn't have given up on me; I'm in your blood. It's fate.
Hojo laughed and kissed the top of her head, "I've always thought so."
Fin!
Notes:
Please, please please… DON'T HATE ME.
I wanted to write something where Inuyasha had the tables turned on him. He was chasing Kagome and for once the choice was hers to make. Of course here it was an adult choice and she almost faltered and chose sex but the real point was Inuyasha wanted Kagome but she refused him. She had a prior commitment and wanted the best of both men very much the same way Inuyasha is already committed to Kikyo and wants the best of both girls.
The original ending had nothing to do with sex. Inuyasha throws his heart on the line and Kagome chose Hojo. The choice pays off when she discovered Hojo never betrayed her.
Sometimes I don't think Inuyasha realizes what he puts Kagome through. But because I had some inkling how angry everyone would be if Kagome choose Hojo over Inuyasha I threw in an extra twist where Hojo was the reincarnation of Inuyasha albeitstill his own person.So don't hate me, please!
GUESS WHAT!
IZ THE HEDGEHOG'S HOLIDAY CARD IS UP FOR ALL TO SEE! Just stop by my profile and hit my website. In the next few hours there will also be a direct link to the card from my profile. It's our way of thanking you for reading :o) If you've ever wondered just what Iz looks like here is your chance to find out.