Merry Christmas fellow Gaters.

I just wanted to share this random piece of seasonal fluff with you all. As always it has a 'sparky' undertone, because lets face it guys John & Lizzie are 'so doing it'.

You may want to read my other stories first (The Atlantis Games & What's up Doc) as there is an 'Ernie' reference that you may not understand otherwise.

Thanks to my little sister & Beta Annie who shares my passion for SGA and all things Joe Flanigan.

Now for the boring stuff………don't own it, don't make any money out of it, just like putting John & Lizzie into 'shippy' situations.

The best present you could all give me this year is a review, so go on, you know what to do……..just dial it up & push the review button!

Special Delivery

"Incoming!" John's voice crackled over the radio.

Elizabeth sighed with relief and peered over the control room balcony just as the evergreen projectile emerged from the shimmering pool of the event horizon.

The huge fir tree shot through the Stargate like an arrow, landing with a ground shaking thud and spraying pine needles over the team assembled at the foot of the stairs.

Elizabeth shook her head in disbelief as a rather grimy Colonel Sheppard appeared from the wormhole, axe in hand, closely followed by the rest of his team, all looking a little worse for wear.

Ignoring the fact that Atlantis's military commander was shamelessly whistling 'high ho' and resisting the temptation to comment on the seven dwarf imagery, Elizabeth schooled her expression and walked down the stairs murmuring the order to 'stand down' to an amused Major Lorne as she passed him.

"All I'm saying is that I'm not used to manual labour," Rodney moaned as he nursed his hand, " I'm a scientist for God's sake, not a woodcutter. I need these hands to work my McKay magic…… I may be scarred for life!"

Well he's definitely 'grumpy'……Elizabeth you are angry, concentrate on looking annoyed she silently reprimanded herself.

"It's a blister man, not a bloody stab wound!" Carson snapped, "I've got some ointment in the infirmary that will help."

Definitely 'Doc'………..Elizabeth!

"Hey Elizabeth!" John's eyes twinkled mischievously as he jogged away from Teyla ….with that grin he could definitely be 'dopey!'…..aaah!

"What do you think?" He carelessly wiped the sweat from his brow and gestured towards the 30 foot pine proudly with his axe.

"What I think Colonel is that you are two hours overdue," she replied sternly, ignoring the tree and checking her watch in an exaggerated gesture.

Sheppard glanced across at Major Lorne and his men who were still brushing pine needles from their fatigues.

Oh Crap…..she was sending a team after us!

"Is it not military protocol to check in with base if you are running behind schedule?"

"I guess we just lost track of time," he replied sheepishly, dragging his hands through his unruly mop of hair and showering Elizabeth with more rogue pine needles.

"Well next time you decide to go all 'Grizzly Adams' on a planet re-con and hack down an alien pine tree might I suggest that you check in with your base commander first Colonel?" she replied, ignoring the muffled snort from McKay.

"Ooh, I told you she'd be pissed," Rodney whispered to Beckett excitedly, the pain in his hand immediately forgotten.

"Elizabeth for Gods sake……where's your holiday spirit?…" John crossed his arms defensively. "It's Christmas, you know the season of turkey sandwiches and good will to all men."

She simply raised an eyebrow and remained silent.

"Scrooge…" he muttered childishly.

Elizabeth stepped closer, her eyes sparkling dangerously, reminding him where they were and that this definitely wasn't the time or the place for a public altercation.

"Be very careful Ernie!" she whispered menacingly.

Oh Shit!

"Elizabeth," John placated nervously, "we just thought it would be a good idea to make Atlantis a little more festive, especially since you've been so busy lately, we couldn't expect you to arrange anything….we just wanted to do something nice for you…….didn't we?" he motioned to his team for support………hello guys, a little help here!

"Didn't we?" he ordered.

"Yes Colonel," Teyla and Carson responded in unison.

"Sure." Ronan was getting bored and began to rotate his axe around his head and body like the Karate Kid, earning him admiring glances from the female contingent.

"Whatever!" Rodney snorted in reply.

Katie Brown entered the Gate Room and Rodney leapt into action, cradling his 'injured' hand and wincing dramatically as she ran across to fuss over him.

John sighed in defeat.

"It won't happen again Dr Weir," he acknowledged sincerely with that puppy dog expression of his that could get him anything he wanted.

"Make sure it doesn't." her face softened slightly as she turned from him, re-checked her watch and grimaced at the mess in her gate room.

"So John…..what were you planning to do with it?"

"I thought we could put it somewhere in the control room, get Rodney to tap into the city's power source, hook up some fairy lights…"

Elizabeth's radio crackled and she placed a finger on the ear piece, turning away from her staff as she murmured quietly in response to the message.

"Colonel!" McKay turned from Katie's attention, "I am a Doctor in astrophysics, what I don't know about quantum physics is not worth knowing and I am not, I repeat not wasting my talents on making the City of the Ancients into a tacky, suburban mall Santa's Grotto…I don't even want to think about the ramifications of tampering with the city's power source like that," he gesticulated wildly with his left hand. "My God, you'll want me to dress up in a red velour suit, stick some cotton wool on my face and abseil from the East Tower next yelling Ho Ho Ho!" he turned away in disgust and stomped out of the gate room closely followed by the botanist.

Teyla looked across at Ronan who had finished his kung fu demonstration. He merely shrugged in mutual confusion and headed in the direction of the commissary in search of food.

John smirked and turned to Elizabeth who was laughing into her headset.

"Yes Santa, you are clear to deliver."

A beam of light engulfed the embarkation area in front of the Stargate, depositing an enormous Douglas Fir tree complete with artificial snow and decorations. A barrel of mulled wine, a crate of Belgian chocolates, festive costumes and a karaoke machine followed as the Daedalus' Asgard transportation device was put to good use.

John's eyes widened at the festive bounty as Elizabeth came to his side.

"Lost for words Colonel?" she enquired, "….that's got to be a first."

"How did you?……When did you?…."

"That's why I was so angry that you were late," she admitted softly, "I didn't want you to miss this, it's my Christmas present to you….I mean to everyone," she hastily corrected.

"Elizabeth…."

"Hey Sir!" Major Lorne interrupted, delving into a crate and pulling out a red suit and black boots. "Where's Mckay?"

As if on cue Rodney ran back into the Gate Room closely followed by Dr Zelenka, who was sporting a rather dapper Christmas jumper and mistletoe hat.

"Hey, we just got some funky energy readings on our equipment…..did Hermiod beam in to wish us a Merry Christmas?…….Holy Cow!"

Rodney starred at the boxes and crates stacked in front of the Stargate and in a rare moment of emotion grinned like a little boy, until he saw what Major Lorne was waving at him.

"You have got to be kidding me…..!"

Despite catching the twinkle of amusement in Elizabeth's eyes, John decided against asking her if she'd been a good girl this year and what she wanted him to give to her. Zelenka's hat could be put to good use come New Years…

Snickering at Rodney's retreating form he tilted his head to one side for a moment as he pondered the idea…..Rodney as Santa?

That was wrong on so many levels!

The End