Thank you, Cynlee, ReluctantDragon, Reinbeauchaser, Mickis, Aaron Smiley, SassyBlonde, Ramica, and Skeletoncrew! Wow. Your group is growing! Heh. I'm concerned that my author's notes will become longer than the chapters. Que sera, sera I guess. But yes, THANK YOU.

To address some concerns/questions/squinty-frowns-and-head-scratching…

Over all? Yes. This will be a series of vignettes in which Mary Sue takes reality to the face like a cream pie. I'm sure she won't always end up dead, but she's a stubborn thing and I'm sure she'll survive being "RESET" every chapter. Her goal is to eventually meet the turtles and have her Mary-Sue-ish way with them… which will ALSO result in some sharp, stinging beatings with the "CLUE" bat. It'll be fun.

HOWEVER… I can't have a tmnt fanfiction with 5+ chapters of Mary Sue dying on public transit. This is where the turtle bits come in. They're exactly what it says: "Meanwhile… Back at the LAIR." I.E. While Mary Sue was being knifed? Mike flooded the bathroom. While Mary Sue was being tormented in a basement? Raph got Don to play foosball. The scenes make a kind of light-hearted note to end the chapters on—a peek into a "moment in the lives of"—and a stark contrast with Mary Sue's horrible mishaps. There is a happy family SOMEWHERE in the city—but they're not psychic. …Unlike Mary Sue, who might be, but is none-the-less, up a creek without a proverbial paddle.

This is supposed to be fluff—and so, I do hope you'll forgive me for not linking turtle scenes together. They're just living their lives. And my editor will KILL me if I try another serious story with the Hanami-re-write in the works AND with that Dead Voltage piece I'm STILL GONNA WRITE ((please don't give up on me!)) with Meira-Bates. PeasnCarrots will ride again! Really. but yeah. Since I don't want my head on a stick by my editor's desk, don't think too hard. I'm not being clever. The turtle scenes are just the guys being guys.

Again, thank you for reading! Thanks TWICE if you reviewed too! ;) PHEW, on with the story!

Attempt Number 003:

A willowy girl with hair of an autumnal hue waited in line at the airport. Mary Sue sighed with mixed hope and regret. She had sworn that she would get out of this small town! Nothing would hold her back. Not her parents. Not her traumatic past. Not even the price of an airplane ticket! She clutched the paper lunch bag that held all that remained of what she had once owned.

Mary Sue bit her lower lip, a solitary tear welled in her emerald eyes, and she wiped it away with a single, tapered finger. She knew that an airline ticket would cost her dearly. Just this morning, she had pawned her mother's locket, her grandfather's gold pocket watch, her dead father's handkerchief, her beloved family dog, her little sister, and her entire CD collection. She burned with loss! However, she now clutched every penny she could lay her hands on in her change purse. She had no time to mourn the past. Her path would take her through the skies to New York City. She would begin there afresh, and live a new life of utter bliss.

Mary Sue stepped up to the clerk, presented her ID, and was promptly told that a ticket to New York City would run $387.23 thanks to the rising price of gas.

Unable to pay, and equally unable to abandon her dreams, Mary Sue burst into impassioned speech. Surely the soulless corporation could afford for one person to fly at a discounted rate! She had sold her LIFE to get to New York City. She would pay them everything she had, but please, please, PLEASE she begged, let her go to New York!

The attendant flatly refused her offer of $30 for a plane ticket and called her parents. Mary Sue was grounded for the next 15 years for selling the family dog.

Attempt Number 003: FAILURE

Lesson Number 003: Call ahead for ticket prices.

Meanwhile, back at the lair…

"Leo? Can't you sleep?" Donatello closed the door to his lab for the night. The clock read past 2 A.M, Don usually had the lair to himself at this hour. Donatello yawned hugely.

"Hm? Oh, I'm tired, but I'm not sleepy—if that makes any sense." Leonardo looked over the back of the sofa before turning back towards the television. The volume had been muted, and Donatello couldn't help but wonder what Leo had found to watch at 2AM on a weekday night. He wandered over.

"So," Don bit back another yawn. "Whatcha watchin?"

"ESPN 2. Tahitian towel wrestling."

"This I gotta see." Donatello hopped over the back of the sofa and joined Leonardo. A few moments passed in silence before Donatello piped up. "The next time Raph flushes the toilet while I'm in the shower, I'm totally gonna use this."

Leonardo nodded in agreement as he watched the wrestlers wield the cloth as a weapon. "S'what I was thinking too."