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Clark was at his apartment. He was laying on the sofa, with the television on, but he didn't pay much attention. He was thinking of everything that had happened and he couldn't find the peace he was always so desperately looking for. His mother had passed away, Lionel had come "back from the dead" to ask him to help Lex, he was getting increasingly tired of Superman, and he was once again in the very familiar position of gradually feeling more and more in love with Lana Lang.

As Pete had told him before, he had to admit that he never stopped loving her, his life was just so packed when he was in Metropolis, that it kind of just lay dormant for a while. But still every time he talked to her or saw her, his heart grew heavy, like his breathing and his stomach was in a constant knot, that he could never untie.

It's all Superman's fault… God I can't stand this any more… How much longer will I have to be a spectator in my own life… The irony in all this is that the same thing that's the reason for my physical invulnerability, has almost crippled my spirit…

"…Police are not sure what was the cause of this explosion, but the reality is that the dead are thought to exceed 50 people… there are also a lot of people still trapped under the rubble of this Luthorcorp factory here in Ohio and the rescue teams are doing everything they can to get to them…" said the NBC reporter on the news, but Clark was lost deep in thought.

How can I keep doing what I'm doing when my life is such a mess… How can I keep this perfect façade when my head and heart are in constant pain… Aaaargh… Screw Superman… Why should I be responsible for saving an entire planet when I can't even seem to save myself…

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Lana was at her place with Laura watching cartoons. As Laura was giggling non-stop next to her, Lana's mind was miles away. I have to find a job… The money I had on the side are rapidly running out… should we go to Metropolis? Lex sounded serious on the phone when he offered to put me in charge of redecorating the entire Luthorcorp plaza. I mean… that will be huge… I've never done anything in such a scale in the past… But I really hoped Laura could grow up in Smallville… face it Lana you can't do your job here in Smallville… and Clark… I hope he is ok… Before he left, Pete told me that he wasn't in such a great shape… maybe I should see him… But do I really want to get into all this grief again? … Maybe it will be different this time… Maybe he won't turn away… and he sure looks like he needs me… but Laura also needs me… I can handle it, can't I? Maybe I will invite him for lunch today… maybe it will help him cheer up…

Lana felt Laura's little hands tug at her shirt. She looked down at her little daughter smiling. Laura pointed at the TV smiling. "C'ark… C'ark… " she said as she pointed at the TV.

Lana looked at the TV curiously and was shocked to see an old report they were running in the news about Superman. They were showing footage of one of the few times that they had caught Superman on camera, saying a few quick words to the people there and then flying away. She looked at her daughter shocked but smiling. "How… How did you…" Lana laughed, still shocked, as she saw her daughter laugh happily clapping her hands. Lana chuckled at the irony of how easy it was for a child to know it was Clark. A child wouldn't understand the distinction between Superman and Clark the meek reporter of the Daily Planet, and therefore could see straight through the confident look and the costume.

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Later that morning.

Lana picked up the phone and dialed Martha's number. The phone kept on ringing but no one seemed to answer. Damn… he must have left the house… But … that's good… it means that he's already feeling better… I really wanted to see him though… snap out of it Lana… you were doing this to help him out, not to see him… Should I call him on the mobile, to invite him over, or would that be too forward… Oh come on… what am I talking about? I've known him for years…

Lana picked up the phone and dialed Clark's mobile. Again no one answered. Now she was starting to worry. Why doesn't he answer? Maybe he is in the middle of saving people… He wouldn't stop to answer a phone call… Or maybe he saw my number and didn't answer… But that's ridiculous… why wouldn't he answer me? Yesterday he was saying he needed me and today he's not answering my calls? Not even Clark can change his mind THAT quickly…I hope he is ok… But it's Clark… what could possibly happen to him? … Maybe I should go check Marta's house… But if he's there and didn't pick up the phone, maybe he doesn't want to talk to anybody… well… if that's the case then he is definitely not alright so I should probably see him… ok… I'm going over…

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Clark was still laying on the sofa. He had a blank stare as he was looking at the wall. He snapped back to reality when he heard the door bell. He looked at his watch and saw that it was already 1 p.m.

I have been laying here for almost 3 hours now… who could it be? Lana…? …Nah… why would she come here…

He got up slowly and walked to the door. When he opened it he couldn't help but smile genuinely, as he saw two beautiful smiling faces looking back at him.

"C'ark" said Laura pointing at Clark as Lana held her in her arms.

Lana smiled as Clark looked at Laura smiling surprised. "Hey" said Lana warmly.

"Did she just… How did…" mumbled Clark.

"She said it today for the first time said Lana smiling. "But you won't believe when she said it."

Clark snapped back and invited them in. "Hey, don't stand there come in… Sorry though about the place… I… I… didn't have time…"

"It's ok Clark. We won't tell anyone, won't we Laura?"

Laura looked at her mother and shook her head no, smiling. Lana walked in to the kitchen and placed on top of the table a bag she carried.

"I didn't feel like cooking today, so we went and got take-away… and… since we were in… the neighborhood… we thought we'd bring you some." She said smiling.

"Uh… thanks… I kinda dozed off and didn't realize it was already noon. I would have gotten out myself if you hadn't come."

"I hope you still like Italian." asked Lana looking a bit unsure at Clark.

Clark just smiled. "Yeah thanks… Uh… I wish I had something to offer you but…"

"Hey don't worry. Today is lazy day for us too. Laura here didn't even want to take a bath." Said Lana trying to sound strict to Laura but failing miserably, as she started laughing when she saw her reaction.

"bath yeshtday…no fish" she said looking up at Lana with wide pleading eyes.

Clark burst out laughing. "Did she say she's not a fish?"

"well… yeah… she's been using that ever since she saw a cartoon with fish, and I stupidly tried to show her how good taking a bath is, since fish are doing it all the time." Said Lana still chuckling.

"Ooh… what a backfire…" mused Clark.

"Tell me about it."

Lana started preparing lunch for the three of them. Hmm… this is good… it doesn't feel weird or awkward… yet… and we seem to have cheered him up a bit… But he looks so awful… Poor Clark… I can only imagine what is going through his head…

"Just before when Laura said my name, you said that I wouldn't believe when she said it for the first time. So when was it?"

"We were sitting in the couch watching TV and I was kinda lost in thought about stuff… and then I felt her tugging at my shirt saying "C'ark C'ark" as she pointed at the TV. Can you guess who they were showing?"

Clark remained thoughtful. "On the TV? …saying my name… but I've never been on…" then realization dawned on him. "… you mean… Superman?"

Lana nodded her head smiling.

"But… how can she… Oh God… I knew I wouldn't fool anybody with that…" said Clark slapping his forehead.

"yeah but you had fooled Lois…" offered Lana before cursing herself for mentioning her.

"Yeah…" said Clark with a downcast look.

Stupid! Stupid! What's wrong with you? Why on earth would you mention Lois to him now? Aargh…

"Um… sorry about that…" said Lana biting her lip.

"No… No… It's ok… I mean… it's not like I haven't gotten over her… or anything…" said Clark a bit clumsily and overenthusiastically.

Lana looked at him perplexed by his reaction. "Oh… um… ok…"

"Yeah… it's just that… with everything that's been going on… you know…" said Clark awkwardly.

"Yeah… you're right… I understand…" said Lana. Yeah… this is definitely getting awkward.

To be Continued…