All is Fair, Or is it?

Chapter 8: After affects

By Everclueless

"Something's wrong, Star. Something's wrong with the boys, I'm worried." Raven said to Starfire.

"Friend Raven, I assure you that the boys are just like always. If you still feel like something's wrong with them, maybe we should send them to see a Cy-kia-trist (psychiatrist)" Starfire tried to pronounce the word, "That is what you mean by something's wrong with them, correct?"

"No, that's not what I mean. They're up to something, I know it."

The two entered the main room.

"Raven, I don't think that they are up to – friend, what is that…smell?"

Raven and Starfire walked into the kitchen area. The oven was smoking. Starfire turned off the oven. She shoved on kitchen gloves and opened the oven door. Smoke billowed out, even thicker.

Starfire pulled out the large plate and put it on a slab of wood so nothing would melt from the heat of the metal plate.

Starfire's kitchen gloves had numerous holes in them, burned off.

"What temperature was the oven set to!" Raven exclaimed in shock.

Starfire grabbed a cloth and started using it to fan away the smoke from the dish so she could see what it was.

Raven turned on the fans and the air conditioners.

Eventually, the smoke cleared.

"Is that…Speedy!" Raven asked, peering.

A creature that was charred black and extremely red was tied to the plate with a burnt apple in its mouth. It was nearly hairless and there seemed to be black where the eyes should have been. The black fell off, clearly it was material, and the creature opened its eyes; they were red. It was twitching.

"Raven! Please heal Speedy! I do not want him to die!"

Raven healed Speedy as much as she could.

His eyes became the normal colour they should be; Starfire quickly shoved a mask on top once they'd seen that it was white instead of red, as to respect his secret identity.

He wasn't charred black anymore but he still was extremely red as if he had an awful sunburn all over his body.

His twitching ceased and he re-grew most of his hair.

Starfire lifted Speedy off of the plate into a hug. Usually, Speedy would've enjoyed this attention.

"Ow…Please! PLEASE! Stop! You're hurting me!" Speedy cried in pain.

Starfire let go so Speedy had his feet on the ground.

"Ow! My feet! Everything hurts!" Speedy whined (wouldn't you in this situation?).

"Here" Raven offered sympathetically, "I'll teleport you to your room with some ice"

"Thank you!" Speedy said gratefully.

He was teleported with some ice to his room.

"See? I told you they're up to something!" Raven said triumphantly, "One of the boys must have done that to him! Maybe they're playing some sort of game, to see who can send the others insane first! It would explain Hot Spot! Or they could be playing Murder except they really are trying to murder people…"

"Friend, I value your thoughts, but maybe Speedy likes the oven. Maybe he jumped in there to get pity so I would forgive him! Oh, isn't that a joyous thing on your planet? Hurting yourself for your friend?"

"Starfire, get real. Speedy is too vain to risk his life for someone, even you. And I highly doubt that he likes the oven in a way that he puts himself inside the oven."

"I guess you are correct. I don't think that they are trying to kill each other or send each other insane but maybe they are up to something."

Raven looked happy; for Raven.

"But maybe they aren't." Starfire said.

Raven's face dropped.

"Anything's possible my friend." Starfire stated, nearly walking into a boot that was hanging in midair.

Raven glanced at the floor, angrily, and saw a note.

It read:

Speedy,

We are friends again! I have realised that this stuffed animal does, indeed, show that you are manly and I like that. I have cooked a banquet for you.

Starfire.

Raven knew that Starfire wrote like she talked and she knew what Starfire's writing looked like and she knew Starfire's cooking skills well enough to know that someone else had written it, but who? And why?

She pocketed the note and noticed Starfire who was carefully staring at the boot which was in midair.

Starfire poked it and nothing happened. Raven pulled it and the string which tied it to the ceiling broke. The boot fell to the floor. Raven picked it up; inspecting it for any suspicious notes.

Starfire walked past her and the boot to the large freezer.

"Friend Raven, Cyborg seems to have bought a new freezer"

"Mmhm, yeah yeah, that's great Starfire" Raven murmured, focusing solely on the boot.

Starfire opened the freezer.

"Friend Raven!" Starfire said in a panicky voice.

Raven rushed over at the sound of Starfire's scared voice.

There stood an ice sculpture looking exactly like Robin.

"Wow! Did Cyborg make this? This is great! It looks exactly like Robin in everyway. Why did he make Robin though? Is he Cyborg's idol? Or is Cyborg gay? EWW! That's a sick thought. Blank it out Raven…Blank it out…"

"Raven, I do not believe this is a sculpture. I think this is the real Robin!"

Raven paused as a blank look took over her face.

She shook it off.

"Nah. It couldn't be. It's solid ice, see?" Raven said, knocking on the head of the sculpture.

Raven turned to Starfire.

"Well I guess it is just a sculpture then…RAVEN LOOK!" Starfire shouted the last part.

Raven spun back around to see a crack forming in the head of the sculpture and a black lock of spiky hair shoot out of the crack.

"It IS Robin!"

The two hauled the ice sculpture out of the freezer and shut the door.

"Friend Raven, let us place him near the fire place! The ice should melt around him!"

"Yeah," agreed Raven as they placed Robin near the fire place.

"Maybe the correct thing to say about Robin's weight is that he should cut down on the pizza?"

"Definitely."

Raven and Starfire waited in silence for the boy wonder to melt.

Thirty minutes later, Robin was defrosted but he was soaked and his teeth were chattering. A towel was wrapped around him and he was sipping some chicken noodle soup.

Starfire was fussing over Robin and how he was the colour blue.

"Oh, Robin! You remind me of my Knorktarkh after it had been half eaten by a Snarlslarkh! I hope your colour isn't permanent like my Knorktarkh was! Do you wish for another towel or a blanket? Do you wish for some pudding of joy to make you happier? Is this soup Raven made called chicken noodle soup not hot enough?"

The doorbell rang repeatedly. It sounded rushed and impatient and…worried.

Raven disappeared through the floor to the front door and opened it. Outside was Aqualad, looking nervous, with most of his costume torn off. He had scratches on his face and he was nearly totally covered in mud.

"What on earth happened to you!" Raven asked looking him up and down.

"Raven! Ah…um…well…you see…can I come in…now…please?" Aqualad asked.

"Tell me what happened to you first" Raven said.

"Well…you see…" Aqualad was having trouble keeping his costume on; it kept almost falling off.

All of a sudden, Aqualad saw the bears. He let out a girlish scream. The bears charged at him, tackled him and started mauling his face, attempting to gauge his eyes out. Aqualad managed to throw the bears off him and run into a small nearby forest.

Raven blinked and shook her head.

"I can believe that the boys are up to something but I can't believe that there are bears attacking Aqualad and Aqualad screaming like that. I must be hallucinating again, just like when that giant pig flew out that window. I should go and have some panadol. If I keep getting these hallucinations, maybe I should see a doctor." Raven murmured, closing the front door.

She teleported herself into the main room again and saw a blue Robin with icicles protruding from his nose and an extremely red speedy trying to kill each other; but they weren't really doing a good job seeing as Speedy was in so much pain and Robin had half-frozen muscles and reflexes.

Starfire was shrieking at them that friends shouldn't try to harm each other and that they should both by resting as they were both in poor condition.

Raven shook her head and took some panadol.

"Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" she said, restraining them from each other.

They both charged at each other again.

"This happened the other day. Today, I'm just not gonna bother." Raven said as she began walking to her room, rubbing her forehead.

"Raven please! Please come back!" Starfire called, trying to separate the boys without hurting them.

An idea struck her, and she kissed both the boys on the cheek. The two dropped to the ground and were suddenly in LaLa land.

"How did you know that would stop them?" Raven asked curiously.

"I watched a movie with friend Robin and in it there were two boys fighting and a girl that was a friend of both of them kissed them on the cheek and the boys stopped fighting."

"Right." Raven said, confused. Then, her mind was clear.

'Of course! Robin and Speedy must both like Starfire! Maybe they found out that the other liked Starfire and they're competing to win her over! And the competition would be of…pranks or something. But then again, they're not immature enough to play pranks and if it were pranks, the oven and freezer weren't very safe pranks and I don't think that Speedy and Robin, who are friends and are kinda like twins, would try to kill each other. And not to mention, what about the other boys? What are they up to?' Raven thought.

Raven started walking away again.

Beast Boy stormed in. He had a blonde wig super glued to his head. He was wearing a dress (superglue). He was decked from head to foot in at least fifty kilograms of make up.

Raven resisted the temptation to laugh but her mouth still twitched upwards. She looked as if Christmas had come early.

Beast Boy's breathing was heavy. He stormed into the main room and passed a mirror. He saw himself with a blonde wig, with heaps of make up and wearing a dress while breathing heavily.

Beast Boy couldn't help but start laughing at himself. He was in hysterics. Raven just stared at him. Robin and Speedy became conscious and also stared at him. Beast Boy looked at them all and fell on the floor, laughing.

Cyborg entered. He looked at Beast Boy, then at Robin, then at Speedy, then at Raven, then at Beast Boy again and he, also, went into hysterics.

Beast Boy got up and started leaning on Cyborg, clutching his stomach from his laughter. His mood changed suddenly. He leaped on top of Cyborg and started strangling him. Cyborg was knocked onto the floor.

"DIE YOU ANIMAL MURDERER, DIE!"

"Trouble…Breathing…" Cyborg managed to get out.

"You know, you'd think I'd feel guilty about not saving Cyborg…" Raven muttered.

She noted all the boys' actions.

"I'm close to figuring this out, I know it."

Suddenly, a nude Aqualad dragged himself through the room. Scratches were all over his body.

"AH! MY EYES! THEY BURN LIKE THE FIRES OF HELL!" Beast Boy, Robin and Speedy screamed, clutching their eyes in protection.

Cyborg saw the opportunity and ran.

Raven walked to the kitchen, got out all the Panadol tablets and started retreating while saying, "Next time someone gets the groceries, don't forget to get me more panadol. I need it to keep sane in this place."

Author's Note:

Hi! I was going to put this much earlier, like I said I would, but I got grounded for, well, that's classified. I am very happy now so I plan to make chapter updates much quicker in about four or so weeks (In about four or so weeks, school end of year exams will be over and done with, YES!) so watch for updates.