Kaliann: I agree. That guy was scum and this was a great emotional chapter with a great look into who Slayer is.
Winblades: Yeah, I totally agree with you that was a great chapter. Well about Jack and Layla, you'll have to wait until the end I don't want to spoil things.
Jenskott: I'm glad you feel that way. Yeah I know what you mean so do I but he really does make great fics from all of that stuff. Yep, not sure how many chapters are left but we got a few good ones before the final battle.
Mark C: Yeah, I agree with you on that except I'm not sure he can move on from Layla. I mean I don't think you can totally get over something like that.
RogueBHS: I was interested in that story. The comic ones I didn't like the whole divorce thing with Scott/Jean in a few though, that that other one I liked. Besides, you took the time to R and R ours so I returned the favour.
Aaron: Technically, Emma isn't an orphan, but I think I got your meaning. Yes this did answer a lot of things and I think people now have a deeper understanding of him.
GothikStrawberry: Sorry you didn't like the afterlife bit, but that's how Slickboy thought out his character, personally I didn't mind it much. Yep it does explain a lot.
Qullian: Yeah, that is true they keep coming back kind of the moral of this I guess.
ViciousAssassin: He can still contact him but only through meditation, glad you loved that chapter so much.
Sparky Genocide: Yeah he has had a terrible life and no one deserves that kind of life. It does explain a lot and true it won't stop them.
Thanks to: X00001, band20, Simba317
Hellfire and Brimstone
CHAPTER 71: REACTIONS
Den
The images around the X-men finally faded as Jack Robinson ended the story that was his life. Returning to reality came as a rather hard shock to them after having seen and witnessed so many vivid horrors. But when it finally hit them, it was like being splashed with cold water, waking them all up to a harsh, bitter reality.
For Jack Robinson, it had been a very difficult road down the tragic story that was his life. He had hoped he would never have to walk that path ever again. It wasn't any easier now than it was nearly a decade ago living with this burden and going through the story had brought out many feelings within him that he had long tried to retain. It all came pouring off him in a wave of pain, but he managed to swallow it as he looked back at his friends as they tried to recover from the horror of what they had just seen.
"There…" he said in a low, monotone voice, "Now you know my past. You're the first ones…The only ones…To know the truth. I'm sorry you had to walk that road with me, but…Hopefully, it explains a few things."
The entire team was silent for a moment as many struggled to comprehend what they had just scene. For some of the couples like Scott and Jean, Kurt and Wanda, Kitty and Piotr, Emma and Vincent, and even the elders that included Logan and Ororo and Hank and Sage found themselves coming closer together after hearing a story of such great loss and heartache, especially over Layla. And for some, it was just too much to handle.
"Aw dang…Ah think Ah'm gonna be sick!" said Rogue as she keeled over and ran off to the side to throw up the contents of her stomach.
"Cherè!" exclaimed Remy, quickly coming to her aid along with Mystique as they both tried to support her while she threw up pretty much whatever she could in disgust.
Rogue had never thought she'd experience anything more horrific than what Selene had done to her…But after seeing what happened to Layla and how many horrors Jack faced in his childhood as an orphan and an underground sex slave, she just couldn't take it. It was just too horrifying.
Jean herself felt her stomach clench tightly into knots, all this brought back images of Shaw and the things he did to her as her eyes filled with tears. Scott was holding her close and she took solace in his embrace. Betsy and Warren were just as shocked, Betsy knew she had been luckier then the other girls and seeing all this she had just never known the kind of darkness that was in the world. She and Warren had grown up with everything they could ask for seeing all that she just hadn't realized how good she had it. Warren himself felt the same as he felt Betsy through their own link that was forming and he sent to her comfort as she did the same.
August who had seen many horrors in he life including many that most of the world didn't believe in was even touched by this. She had seen and read many things with her studies under Selene and had suffered herself under Selene. She could empathise with his sense of loneliness but not with this pain for losing the two people that meant the world to him. She had never had either friends growing up and never felt anything like love with another person. But she could tell just how deeply that pain cut him.
"Oh my God…" cried Kitty, covering her mouth in horror as tears streamed down her face, the images still so fresh in her mind.
"Mien Gott…" gasped Kurt in disbelief, his hand clinging desperately to Wanda, trying to get the air into his lungs after what he had just seen, "You…You really vent through all zhat?"
"Yeah…" answered Jack in a flat tone, trying not to let his emotions get the best of him.
"You…You died?" said Laura, finding such a story disturbing even by her standards.
Jack simply nodded his head, swallowing hard at the memory. It was something that nobody here could possibly relate to…Actually seeing the other side and going down that tunnel that everybody eventually goes down. And while he had managed to 'show' them what happened…That didn't mean they could truly experience.
"I know…" he found himself saying, "But believe me, death wasn't so bad. In fact, looking at you all as you stand now, I think you've got a lot to look forward to when that day comes. Even for those that have made a mistake or bear a heavy conscious, I can see an enjoyable eternity for all of you. It just depends on your life and how you live it. But it's a double edged sword at times. Life can corrupt just as much as it can sanctify…I myself am a testament to that. It was my life that brought me most of the pain. And to tell you to truth…I kind of liked dying. It was a nice release. But I guess there were some very powerful forces had other plans for me."
It was a hell of a revelation…Learning that there was actual life after death. For those not necessarily tied to faith like Hank and Sage, it was a perplexing, if not impossible feat. But they knew that through that eye of his…They could not deny anything they saw. They knew it was true…It was just a little difficult to digest.
"So…There truly is life after death?" said Sage.
"Yep…" affirmed Jack, "It goes back to how Yoshinto explained everything to me. There are two worlds…The real and the spiritual. Each one exists side by side…Yet they area also so very strongly connected. No religion in the world can accurately describe what I saw on the other side…But I think you should at least take comfort in the fact that there really is a nice reward for life. It's just a matter of living a good life…And in turn, you'll have a good death."
It was a simple means to sum up one of the greatest mysteries in the history of mankind…And this orphan from San Francisco had done it in a few sentences. It was pretty remarkable to say the least and aside from the horrors he had faced, it was somewhat uplifting as well in that he managed to overcome the past in some ways to be come to the warrior he was now.
"So…Did you meet God?" asked Kurt, always the spiritualist.
"No…" replied Jack, shaking his head, "But I did get a chance to see that there is a 'God' on the other side. But it's not something you should really worry about. It's like I said…You live in one world, God lives in the other. And I'm the unlucky son of a bitch who's gotta deal with both."
With a heavy sigh, Jack was exhausted. Retelling the story of his life had drained more energy than a fight with Selene. Seeing Layla again was not easy…No matter how beautiful she looked or how much it made his heart race every time he remembered those good memories before getting around to the bad ones. Part of him never wanted to think of her again because of how much it hurt…But there was still so much about her that he wanted to hold onto. The comfort she brought him…The joy she brought to his life…Those were the things he didn't want to forget. But he could never escape not having been there for her when she needed it most…He could never forgive himself for not saving her in her greatest time of need.
"Jack…" said Vincent, who probably had a better understanding of his pain along with Emma since they had both been on the streets as well, "I…"
But he couldn't even begin to speak about such horrors. It was hard enough going into his own past, but seeing some of the things Jack went through really gave him a means to relate. But then again, he was at somewhat of an advantage…He had Emma. Jack had once had Layla…And he watched her die. It was something Vincent couldn't even begin to fathom…Being forced to watch the woman he loved get raped and killed right before his eyes. Yet Jack had endured it…And in many ways, it really did start to explain some of his behavior.
"Are you going to be okay?" said Emma, noticing his distant look.
"Yeah…I'll be fine," he said in a low tone, "I told you what I wanted to tell you…You all now know the truth. So why don't we leave it at that?"
Suddenly, the purple maze that often brought him both in and out of sight began to surround him and his appearance began to fade before their very eyes. All these looks…All these horrid gazes from the reactions of his painful life…They were just too much to take. He knew they all still had plenty of questions, but there was only so much he could handle at once.
"Jack! Wait!" said Scott as he got up in an effort to stop him.
But it was too late. Within the blink of an eye…He was gone again, retreating back into his isolation. Sure, it was going to worry everybody now that they had an honest idea as to just how messed up he was. But at the same time, maybe they would finally understand why he stuck to the shadows for such a long time, never allowing himself to grow close to anybody. He already had a heart that had been shattered into million pieces…He didn't need it destroyed any further.
"Aw dang…" groaned Rogue, still hunching over the area where she had thrown up, "Ugh…Oh God…Ah can't believe it…"
There were tears in her eyes as the images from Jack's life continued to swim around in her mind. But thankfully, Remy was there to pull her into an embrace as she let out a wave of sobs from everything she had just seen.
"Shh…It's okay, cherè…It's okay," he said to her in a soothing tone.
"Ah…Ah can't believe anybody could go through somethin' like that," she said, throwing her arms around her boyfriend and holding on for dear life.
"I know…I know," he said to her, gently hugging her back.
In Remy's arms, she seemed to slowly calm down. It was a sight that gave Mystique mixed feelings, since it kind of showed just how close Rogue and Remy were. Even though she had already had her little 'chat' with the Cajun, that didn't mean that scenes like this got any easier for her to process.
Eventually, though, she managed to tear herself away from the sight and focus back on Jack. Having been one of the only residents here other than her kids who had given her a chance, he was someone she felt rather close to. And now that she knew where he had come from, it did kind of give her a strange feeling since it was really the first time she ever got to know somebody whose life was truly more horrific than hers. It actually made her feel lousy in a sense that she had so often complained about her harsh life in the past…Yet here was a guy who had faced horrors the likes of which she couldn't even begin to fathom, but he still retained so much inner strength through it all.
"Oh boy…So what are we gonna do now?" asked Logan, thinking this was definitely something that was going to effect them since they were Jack's friends and it was up to them to help them through this.
"I don't know…What can we do?" said Ororo, leaning onto her lover as images of Jack's lost love continued to play out in her mind.
"Well it sure does explain a lot, you know?" commented Sage, "I mean…No wonder he's such a recluse."
"Yeah…No wonder he didn't want to join at first," said Wanda, thinking her life was bad, but compared to Jack's, he had plenty of other things worse off than her.
"I guess he was afraid of getting close to anybody and facing that same agonizing heartache again…" said Jean, who knew how hard the sting of death was from her experience with Annie, "But now that he's here, I guess we kind of have a duty to help him. It sure looks like he could use it."
"I don't know about that, Jean," said Vincent, "I think he may just need some space for the moment."
"But after what he just had to go through again!" exclaimed Kitty, her eyes still flowing with tears, "How can we just sit here and…"
However, the Professor cut her off before she could go any further, seeing clearly that she was getting a little hysterical.
"Vincent is right, Kitty," he said to her, needing some time as well to make sense of all this, "Jack told us his story for a reason…He wanted us to understand. And I think that we should honor his wishes in that regard and give him some time and space."
"But…" she began.
"He's right, Katya…" said Piotr in a solemn tone, "Heaven knows that after what he just went through…He'll need some time to process it. All we can do is simply be there for him as any friend should."
-Later that day-
Vincent was in the living room just trying to wrap his head about that story Slayer told them all. He could relate to things like living on the streets, being alone, taking in by someone and shown the road of honor, but some things he just couldn't or he didn't want to understand. While sitting on one of the more comfortable chairs he saw Remy walk in.
"Hey," Vince said as the Cajun man gave a slightly forced smile.
"Hey, how is de little lady?" he said with a knowing grin, indicated that he probably knew.
"You know?"
"About de little one?" Remy grinned and Vince nodded, "Oui, Remy just heard. Congratulations."
Vince smiled for the first time since the Den, "Thanks, but let me tell you man…I'm scared as hell about this."
"About what?" Piotr asked as he walked in with Kitty linked in arms as well as Wanda and Kurt.
"Well, might as well let the entire mansion know," Vince sighed as they all came in, "Emma's pregnant."
"What?" came several voices, although he and Gambit had to admit, it was pretty funny seeing the looks of shock on their faces.
"Nice going dude," Kurt smiled broadly after everything going on this was great news. A new life was going to be brought into the mansion and he ported over and clapped him on the back.
Kitty just squealed and jumped in excitement, "Oh my god! This is like the greatest thing ever! Man, everyone thought that Jean and Scott would have been the first ones. I SO have to talk to Emma and congratulate her."
"Give her a bit of time first Kitty," Vincent told her as she stopped as she had just turned ready to run off and fine Emma. "She's taking a little rest at the moment."
"Yeah I heard that can happen," Wanda said nodding, remembering how in studying biology once she went through a few of the things that happen when women get pregnant. There were a few things she had no idea happened, although now that she thought about it, it kind of made sense how she had been lately.
"Yeah, she's sick in the mornings, getting food cravings, gets a bit tired lately, and I've noticed a few headaches," the Canadian admitted.
"You've been lookin' up stuff like that or somethin'?" Remy asked with a grin.
Vince rubbed the back of his neck, "Well…Yeah, I mean I'm gong to be a father, so I've been looking a lot of this stuff up to be ready, you know?"
"Well that is a good idea. I remember how nervous my father was when my mother was having my little sister." Piotr smiled at the memory. His father normally a very calm and collect man, but during that time especially near the end he was so nervous it was just funny.
Kitty then looked at Gambit with a bit more serious face. She hadn't seen Rogue since Remy had taken her out of the room, "Gamibt…How is Rogue doing? I went to her room, but she wasn't in there."
"She's in my room. Rogue wasn't feelin' dat well," Remy sighed sitting down. He knew the kind of memories that had been dug up for her. The trauma that she had been working to overcome for months. She had been so frail at first in his arms as they had laid in his bed just holding her. After about half hour she was more like her old self and at the moment she was just resting in his bed. He wasn't sure, but he got the feeling she would ask him to spend the night with him again after this and he didn't mind at all.
Last time had been very good. He hadn't just stayed in bed and just held a woman before…Well besides his first love, but that was a long time ago and something he couldn't go back to. Rogue helped to fill the void in him left by her and he wanted to be there for her through all of this.
"So she's doing well?" said Kitty, hoping she would make it through this. Rogue was like a sister to her lately and they kind of had been since they had shared a room. She never told anyone, but she had kind of liked that because even the arguments made her feel like she was part of a large family. Being an only child she had grown up being a little lonely.
"Well Rogue is a strong woman. She just needs to be left alone for a bit," he told her and Kitty nodded her head. She saw Kurt's look on his face as Wanda was close to him giving him some small comfort. Kitty knew how much Kurt loved his sister, even though she wasn't by blood to him, Rogue was his sister in so many ways that mattered.
"Kurt, you know Rogue. She's going to be okay," Wanda told him and he nodded.
"Ja, I know I just vish I could do more for her," he sighed as he sat down. Wanda sat down next to him taking his hand.
"I think we all feel the same," Vincent said to him with sad eyes, "But sometimes you just can't help someone fight their own personal…Issues." He was about to say demons, but given what happened recently he figured that wouldn't be the best time to say that word.
"Some battles you just have to fight on your own, but it is nice to have friends and loved ones to support you when you need it. Trust me on this one," Vince said, speaking from his own personal experience. Everyone here had been helping him and not just Emma. The group sessions with everyone did help and he was so glad to have everyone.
Kurt could relate as well, "Ja, it is nice to have others with you to help…I just hope we can be zhere for Jack."
A silence fell upon them all as they thought about that one, "Da, it must be hard for him to have been alone for so long…Having no one to talk to and support him through this," Piotr said at last.
"I know I just feel so horrible what he had to go through," Kitty's eyes misted up at the thought of what she had seen. It had just been so horrible and she just wished she would help Jack.
"Yeah, well has anyone seen him?" Vince asked looking around and no one seemed to have.
Remy sighed, "If dat man dosen't want to be found, then he sure as hell will make sure of it. For now, Gambit say just let him deal. Opening old wounds like dis ain't easy and maybe we should let him heal up before we go to him. Let him get comfortable and try not to rush him, just take dis one step at a time." Although Gambit had no idea what to do himself, he wasn't much of a 'comfort' person well with men at least. With women, he was much better, but he was just clueless about how to handle things like this with men. He had seen some nasty things when he was living on the streets before the Thieves Guild took him in and he had seen death and a lot of unpleasant things but like most of the others never something that horrible.
"Yeah he'll be back," Wanda nodded, "And we should let him know he's not alone anymore…Being alone is the worst thing in the world." She found herself whispering the last part, remembering how alone she had been for years all locked up in that cell of a room. Kurt noticed this and wrapped his tail around her waist and held her close she smiled at him. The rest of them smiled at that and even though they all knew that Jack's past was horrible they would still be there for him, he was their friend no matter what.
At that moment Vince thought about something as he got up, "You know, I just thought of something…If you'll excuse me." He left the room as he wanted to prepare. Jack's story had got him thinking about Emma and how he had her in his life and he had been thinking of when he would ask her the question. After all of this, he made up his mind to not waste anymore time and do something before it was either too late or he never got the chance to.
-Emma and Vince's room-
Emma was walking back to bed after all that had gone on today, she just wanted to curl up next to Vincent and just let today slip away. Besides feeling a bit worse for how she handled Slayer, at least now she had a deeper understanding. She knew hardship, but not to certain extents that he had. Although she had lived on the streets and had done some things in the Hellfire Club she wished she hadn't, there were just some things Jack suffered that she couldn't imagine.
'God with all the issues in this house maybe we should look into getting a shrink,' she thought to herself.
When she opened the door there was a long stem white rose her favourite flower there with a note. She smiled to herself knowing that only one man would know this was her favourite and who would give it to her. She opened the card and it simply said to go to the balcony.
'What are you up to now Vincent Freeman?' she wondered, but she was also a bit excited too. He always was the romantic type and although she had never thought of herself going for that stuff, when he did it, it just made her feel special that someone would go to all the trouble.
She went out to the balcony and looked around, not seeing anything else there just when she was wondering what was going up and was suddenly swept off her feet as she stopped herself from shouting out in surprise. She turned to look at the face of the on who whose arms she was in.
"Are you trying to give me a heart attack?" she asked him with a glare.
Vincent simply smiled at her, "Sorry, but I couldn't resist."
She sighed, "Just…Don't do that too many times. I like surprises as much as the next girl, but scaring me half to death like that is not one of them." Her face then softened. She looked at they were flying to the top of the mansion. "So…What is the surprise you got cooked up now?"
"You'll see," he simply said and as they came to the roof and landed her breath caught her. There was a large comfy blanket with rose peddles leading to it and there were a dozen or more candles there. She really didn't know what to say. Sure, it was the kind of corny romance that one would expect in cheap romance novels. But on the other, there as just something about going to all the trouble that touched her.
He led her to the center as she tried to control the flood of emotions going through her. She hated how her hormones were starting to act up because they didn't help, but she could sense a great nervousness in him. However, he was guarding his memory from her. He turned to face her and brushed a strand of her hair away from her face as he looked into her eyes. She loved how he always looked at her with such love.
"Emma, I just wanted to tell you that…You mean the world to me. All my life, I've felt so alone and I've had to deal with a lot of issues. In you, I found a kindred spirit someone who looks past all the scars and all the pain to see the man I am on the inside. You bring out the best of me…You cared for me while I was in my darkest moment with Selene…You helped me then and even now to live with all my pain."
Emma felt her eyes get a bit misty and she swore that if he played that 'Kiss from a Rose' song by Seal, she would start crying.
He smiled at her as a hand caressed her cheek, "You brought so much light and love to my life Emma. We've been through a lot together and I know that I wouldn't want anyone else beside me. You're carrying our child and I want us to be together forever…"
She watched as he literally got down on one knee and she had to smile at this. She should have known he would go all out with a romantic proposal.
Finally, he pulled out a box, "Listening to Jack's story…I couldn't help but think what would my life be without you and honestly, it wouldn't mean much at all," he opened the box and she was surprised at the beautiful, elegant ring. "Emma Grace Frost…Will you marry me?"
"Oh Vincent…Of course I will, but then you knew that," she said trying not to let her emotions break out into a flood or tears.
"I know…I just needed to say the words," he smiled at her as he placed the ring on her finger. He couldn't believe just how lucky he was now. It seemed that life was finally starting to give him some happiness for once. He was going to marry the woman of his dreams and start a family of their own together. He didn't care about anything else as he wrapped her up in his arms and kissed her deeply. She returned it with passion feeling tears of joy starting to fall.
Soon the two were on the blanket kissing each other and caressing each other as they both just wanted to enjoy this moment. This was their moment and they wanted to enjoy it to the fullest.
"Oh god Vincent," Emma gasped out through the kisses, "Please…Make love to me here and now."
"Anything you want my Queen," he whispered into her lost in the passion and the emotion of the moment using their little nicknames.
I love you…My Knight she sent to him as their minds began to open up to each other as the intimacy between them grew.
And I love you too Vince thought back as that night he made love to not just the woman he was in love with, but with his fiancée and soon to be his wife.
-Scott and Jean's Room-
Jean was getting ready for bed, combing her hair in a vanity mirror. She saw Scott changing into his sleep wear, mainly just loose cotton pants and a tank-top shirt. She smiled at him, remembering Slayer's story of his lost love. A few times they, had nearly lost each other. When she had been kidnapped from the college she and thought he was dead. Jean's heart had broken and she nearly lost all hope or meaning in her life.
Then only recently, she had nearly been lost and the strain on Scott had been noticed by her. Lately, he had been very preoccupied too. She hoped that all was okay with him. She hated worrying him and she never wanted to leave his side. They both had been through a lot together over the years and she just knew that together, they all could come out through this.
Scott was on the bed and open the drawer on his side of the bed where he kept his sleep shades. Since he didn't want to break his shades and because they were uncomfortable to sleep in, he also had these special ones. They were smooth and made especially to fit his face with a strap on them so they wouldn't fall off his face. But there was also something else in there as well.
He saw the small velvet box there with the ring in it. He looked at it a moment as he thought back to Jack's life story. The thing that hit him the hardest was Layla, because that had nearly happened to Jean. He had nearly lost her twice and the thought of something like that happening to Jean would just kill him inside. She was his life, part of his soul, and to lose her would tare out the best in him.
Scott had thought about his life with Jean for years. He always knew that she was the one for him, the one he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He wanted nothing more then to just have her as his wife and with everything that had been going on he wanted that to happen soon. But first they will deal with Selene, after that was done, he would ask Jean to marry him. He wanted this for so long, but he was also nervous about this.
They were both still in college while they were adults and living together now, it was still a bit soon. He was in her family's good graces thankfully now too. But he wanted this to be perfect and when the time was right he was going to ask her. He felt the bed shift as Jean got in so he closed it making sure that the box was well hidden. Thankfully she never looked in that drawer since it only had stuff he used.
He saw Jean in her oversized shirt and smiled at her beauty as he shifted over and wrapped her in his arms, his head nuzzling the back of her head as he felt her hands grip his over her stomach. This is exactly what he wanted out of life, just Jean. Moments like this for the rest of his life, ever since that first day all those years ago when they had first met he felt there was just something about her. And over the years as their friendship grew into love, he knew that she was the only one for him.
He took a breath of her fragrance on her hair. He knew it by memory and the warmth of her body pressed against his as well. He never wanted to let go of her…She was everything to him and one day soon he was going to ask her to spend the rest of his life with him. But at the moment, all he wanted was to just hold the woman he loved in his arms.
Jack/Mystique
After things finally managed to settle throughout the institute, everybody turned in for the night. Many of the couples ended up spending extra time together after having heard Jack's story. His accounts of such unimaginable loss made those who were in love appreciate what they had in a big way. But for others who didn't have that luxury, they had other ways of dealing with such revelations.
As for Jack himself, after having retreated to the woods for a while in order to meditate and refocus his mind after everything he had been through, he eventually found himself on the ground floor of the institute in the living room with a few bottles of hard liquor that Logan had generously lent him. By now, it was late and everybody was either asleep or in their rooms, so it was quiet for once. And for the moment, he could simply drown his sorrows in booze as he so often had done over the last decade.
Yet while much of the institute felt the desperate need to rest after having learned so many disturbing details of his life, there were still a few who were up and about…Namely the institute's resident shape shifter, who had been unable to sleep with such memories still so clearly in her mind.
"Jack? Jack is that you?" she asked as she entered the living room and approached the area where the young mutant warrior had just begun taking shot after shot of whisky and bourbon.
"Hey…Still up I see," said Jack as he turned to greet his blue skinned friend, still not tipsy yet, but hoping to get there soon.
"Hey yourself…" she said in a somewhat irritated tone, "Where the hell have you been? Everybody was really worried about you."
Jack found himself swirling his glass of hard liquor in his hand, keeping his focus on the strong alcoholic beverage that so often brought him at least some small relief from his horrific life. But there was still that part of him that did feel bad for making the others worry about him…After all, they were his friends and after what he had just shown them, how could they not be worried?
"I just needed some time alone, that's all," he told her, "But I think I've had enough…Here, want to join me? I've got an extra glass."
Looking back at him with a curious expression, she didn't know whether he was serious or not. But judging from the look on his face, he really did seem like he wanted her company. And while she probably wouldn't have admitted it to anybody who commented on it…She kind of wanted his as well. After all, it wasn't every day she got a chance to spend time with somebody who knew all too well what it was like to live such a painful life.
"Sure…Why not?" she said with a slight smile as she sat down next to him and watched as he generously poured her a glass before she downed it in one big gulp.
It had been a while since she had done any drinking. But given many of the complications in her life, she did have some experience. And from the looks of it, so did Jack…Not that she could blame him, of course. After having gone through the whole story of his life, who wouldn't need a drink after that?
"So what should we drink to?" he told her as he poured himself another shot.
"I don't know…To surviving the worst life can throw at us?" she said, ever the cynic.
"I was thinking maybe more in terms of…To finally getting something off my chest that's been bearing down on me for years," said Jack, trying to have at least some sense of optimism despite his solemn mood.
"Sure…That works for me too," she said, casting him another smile as they both tapped their glasses and simultaneously downed another round of hard liquor, allowing the alcohol to do it's thing.
Then suddenly, Mystique found herself laughing. It was an odd feeling to her and if anybody else other than Jack had seen it, they would have been freaked out to no end…But she couldn't help it. And at this point, she was beyond caring.
"What's so funny?" asked Jack, letting himself relax onto the couch as he held a glass of liquor in his hand.
"Nothing…I guess I just find it funny that I'm sitting here drinking with a friend when only a few months ago, I probably didn't have a friend in the world to drink with," she made, still chuckling despite herself, "Add to that…My friend just happens to be a super powered warrior who probably knows more about the state of the world than I can ever hope to manage."
"Hey, life is crazy…It's as simple as that," he said as they both leaned back on the couch together, just letting the good company of booze and friends guide them along, "When you've got an eye that sees everything, you tend to get at least some idea of just how convoluted everything is."
"I can only imagine…"
"Oh no you can't…" he said, laughing somewhat at her words, "The things I see range from the truly horrific to the truly heartening. There is good and there is bad out there…And I'm just a guy, so I can't even begin to process which one is more prevalent than the other. I've seen the best of both sides…Selene on the side of evil…Layla on the side of good. It really is a hell of a mind job when you think about it…Because the forces of darkness and light are not always so defined. There's gray area everywhere…Complications that no human mind can ever hope to manage."
"Then how do you manage it?" she asked, taking another sip of her drink.
"By remaining indifferent I suppose. It's like I've said, I've never been one to fight for things like truth and justice…That kind of stuff is only relative. It's a generalized idea in a world that isn't generalized…So I leave that to the people who have the faith to go along with that while I fight for what I believe in."
"You mean honor?" she said, remembering back to some of the stuff he had told her during their little trip through his mind.
"Yeah…Honor," said the mutant warrior as he found himself simply sinking into his seat as he reflected on where he had come from and how he kept moving forward, "It probably the only real solid thing I find is worth fighting for. Sure, truth and justice are one thing…But you can eventually doubt stuff like that in the long run."
"Oh believe me…I understand that," said Mystique with a slight chuckle, "Justice is a nice pipe dream at best…But it's pretty hard when you feel as though the world has never granted it to you no matter how much you fight."
"Speaking from experience, Ms Darkholme?" commented Jack with a slight grin.
"I guess you could say that. After all, you're the one here with the all seeing eye."
"True, but that doesn't mean I use it 24/7 to get the full story."
"And why is that? Wouldn't it be so much easier?" she asked, not knowing his logic behind it.
"It would…But I'd rather have a good conversation. Wouldn't you?"
The shape shifter found herself laughing again, thinking she was on route to set a record for most laughter in a single night. But she was beyond caring at this point. If that's where this night would lead her, so be it.
"Yeah…Conversation is nice," she said as she took another gulp of her drink, "But when you look like I do, it's pretty hard to have an honest one. And I guess that's part of the reason I'm so messed up…Because I keep wanting justice against a world that forced me to live behind a veil of lies. It's why I've never had a lot of faith in Xavier's dream to say the least…Because I don't think it does justice to those who are suffering from being oppressed."
"But with your powers, you could conceivably live a normal life, Raven," said Jack, finishing his drink before pouring himself another.
"I could…But I shouldn't have to."
Jack couldn't help but smile at that, for it really did put a lot of things in perspective for this woman. Everybody in the mansion may have had their opinions about her, but he could see even without the aid of his all seeing eye that she had a good soul deep down that rough exterior…It was just a matter of getting her to show it instead of letting her impulses get the better of her.
"Well I can't say I blame you," said Slayer as he turned to face the shape shifter sitting right next to him, "And to be honest with you…I can't see myself fighting for Xavier's cause either. There's just too much to doubt…Too much you have to ignore in order to have faith in it. That's why I fight for my honor…It's something that's so much more defined…So much simpler."
"No kidding…Wish I could have fought for something like that rather than my own selfishness," muttered Mystique in response.
"So what made you change your mind in the end?"
"Simple…My kids," she said, her tone lightening up somewhat from that, "They give me a reason to have faith…They give me a reason to move on. Even though I've made so many mistakes with them, that doesn't mean I love them any less."
"Yeah, that much I don't think anybody doubts."
"I know…I guess I just let my own anger towards the world get in the way all the time for denying me the right to live my life like a normal person," she said, her words becoming somewhat distant, "I just didn't have a way to deal with all this pent up frustration…I didn't have a way to remind myself of that which is genuinely good in the world."
"Yeah…That is tricky…Especially when you face the worst that darkness has to offer," said Jack in an empathetic tone.
"So how do you manage?" she asked curiously.
"Honestly…Just by never forgetting what truly matters to me," he answered, "As long as I remember my honor, I have everything I need to keep going on. And also…Booze and lots and lots of hookers on the side also helps to some extent."
Mystique looked back at Jack with a somewhat surprised look not unlike the one he got from Logan when he told him the same thing. But unlike Logan, it didn't seem to really impact her as greatly…If anything, she found it somewhat intriguing.
"Well…Guess you can't go wrong with that," she said with a shrug, "After what you've been through…I honestly don't blame you."
"Thanks…I appreciate that…Really."
"Don't mention it," she said, letting out a sigh as she poured herself another glass, "Too bad I didn't have stuff like that when I was dealing with my own shit. It would have been nice to have something like honor to hang onto rather than anger and bitterness. That, and maybe a little extra booze and some sex now and then could have done me good."
"Yeah…It's not much of a release in some ways…But it's a release none the less," shrugged Jack.
"Wish I could remember though…It's been years since the last time I've had a man," she sighed, "And it's been even longer since I've had a DECENT man."
They both found themselves laughing at that together for some reason. Maybe it was because the alcohol was finally starting to get to them or maybe it was just that they were enjoying one another's company. It was pretty radical for the both of them given that they were both such loners. But that was probably only further reason for them to reach out to one another…For unlike so many others throughout the institute, they could understand each other. They knew what it was alike to be so alone in the world.
And for Mystique, the fact that this was a man who not only understood her, but also had plenty of good looks going for him as well…Was definitely not lost upon her. Having not been around a man like him before, she couldn't help but find herself attracted to him in some ways. After all, he was talking to her in her normal, blue form and he didn't seem to give a damn. It was the first time in recent memory that anybody had been able to look past her appearance…And for that reason and many others, it stirred within her plenty of old, pent up feelings.
"Jack…" she said, finally managing to break the silence.
"Yes Raven?" he said, turning back to face her as he finished his drink.
"Thank you…"
"For what?" he asked curiously.
"For the good conversation…I think it may be the first one I've had with somebody in my natural form in…I can't even remember."
"Hey, anytime," said Jack as he set aside his glass, "I may not know dick about friendship, but I definitely know the value of a good conversation."
"Yeah…But conversation aside…I think there's definitely more we could offer one another," she said, still taking the last few sips of her drink.
"What do you mean?"
Mystique hesitated briefly before going on, but in looking back at the dazed, yet tortured young man that had been through so much, she couldn't hold it in any longer. While she never thought she would find herself facing an opportunity like this before in her life, she was intent on not squandering it.
"Jack…How long has it been…You know, since you've had a woman?"
Jack, despite the effects of the alcohol, tensed up a bit from that. But despite this, he kept his cool and answered.
"About three months…The last time being four hookers I found in Chicago after having stopped a serial killer that had been possessed by a demon."
"Four?" she said, sounding both surprised and intrigued by such prowess.
"Yeah…I kind of have a lot of energy to boot in that regard," he admitted.
"Well I guess it really isn't healthy anyhow…" she said, a slow smile spreading across her face, "Maybe that's why I'm always so tense and bitter…Maybe that's why I can't seem to make the right decisions."
Knowing exactly what this was leading up to, another silence fell over Jack Robinson and Raven Darkholme. But neither of them seemed too daunted or dissuaded by such things…If anything, they were already beginning to embrace them. After all, it wasn't like they couldn't use it after all the shit they had been through.
"You want me to help you with that?" he said to her, finally cutting right to the chase.
"I was really hoping that you would…" she said, pouring herself another round, "I was thinking…Why don't we have one last drink together…And then head to my room and jump into bed?"
"Sounds like a plan to me…" said Jack with a grin as he picked up his glass and shared one last drink with the shape shifter, "Because after tonight…I think we could both really use it."
NEXT UP CHAPTER 72: SHOW AND TELL