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Chapter 32: Council

Revan had been startled from his rest by Carth's shouting. Casting a concerned glance at Bastila for a moment, Revan stood, glad that the blinding pain in his abdomen had lessened some. Leaving his cloak in the small medical bay, Revan entered the common room of the Ebon Hawk, taking in the glares of his crewmates.

"None of you here stand a chance against him. Only Bastila and I could even hold our own. No one should be under the delusion that they can take on Darth Malak..."

The room was filled with silence, Canderous looked as if he wanted to argue that point, but the Mandalorian held his tongue, instead smirking as he saw the anger building in Carth.

"That bastard destroyed my homeworld!"

Revan sneered, surprising Carth.

"I am tired of hearing about your damned homeworld Carth. First its Saul Karath betrayed you, then its me, then its Malak. You know what? Unless you want to spend the rest of this trip unconscious, I'd suggest you look at the big picture. Telos was worthless and aside from raw materials, it will remain worthless. We were preparing to fight a war on a scale you could not possibly imagine and until you've seen what we've seen, lay off."

Carth scowled, opening his mouth to speak, but was silenced by Mission's cutting argument.

"What about Taris, Revan?"

The others remained silent, Juhani looking as if she were going to charge into the cockpit herself and drag Malak out. Revan ground his teeth together in annoyance.

"What about Taris?"

Revan spat, knowing he may be throwing away more than one friendship. Mission looked hurt and ran from the room, crying. Revan turned his eyes to Juhani, seeing an equally pained expression.

"Throw your hatred aside, Juhani. Unless you wish to join the Sith, then by all means..."

It was a slap in the face, and it worked. Revan felt the anger boiling within the Cathar and waited until she was able to control it better.

"I need Malak. He's powerful in the Force and one of the best warriors I know. I would trade all of you for him, and it would be worth it."

Revan allowed the words to sink in before continuing.

"We're going against an enemy that has had a thousand years to prepare for us... I am not asking any of you to follow me... In fact, if any of you do, I will stop you myself."

Canderous scoffed at the thought of missing a battle and decided there would be no harm in excluding himself from that warning.

"You can all go back to wherever you want after this, but don't follow us."

"Good advice."

Malak's mechanical voice boomed, startling the remaining crew.

"Are we going to speak to the Jedi about this, Revan?"

Revan was still a moment before nodding.

"Yes... it will take some time to convince them, but we should meet in a neutral area..."

Canderous rose a brow.

"How do you plan to do that? As I recall you all are war criminals within the Republic and the Jedi would sooner kill you than hear anything you had to say."

Revan eyed the Mandalorian curiously.

"That's... true..."

The former Sith Lord began, surprised by the Mandalorian's insight.

"Good, then we should find someplace with an independent government. Somewhere the locals owe you a debt of gratitude? Somewhere untouched by the Jedi Civil war."

Malak and Revan exchanged glances before both spoke at the same time.

"Onderon."

Carth grumbled something unintelligible.

"What was that?"

Malak hissed. Carth said nothing, glaring silently at the Sith Lord.

"You can all stay on Onderon. Queen Talia may be a Republic sympathizer... but she will honor her debt to us..."

Carth rolled his eyes.

"What debt?"

Malak glared at the Republic Commander, entertaining the idea of disemboweling him.

"We promised that Onderon would not know war with us... an arrangement Malak and I made with Queen Talia when we first invaded Dxun with the assistance of General Kenobi..."
Revan frowned, recalling his broken friend. Malak bowed his head, trying to remember where exactly everything went to Hell.

"Bring us out of hyperspace, and set course for Onderon, Corellia can wait."

Malak furrowed his brow.

"Why is Corellia so important?"

Revan brushed a hand wearily through his hair.

"There are some rebel Sith there that wished to follow me... We were gathering strength..."

Malak grunted mechanically, looking across the room to a bulkhead, seemingly entranced by the sheet of durasteel.

"Queen Talia will surely remember the saviors of Onderon..."

Revan muttered, wondering where exactly the Queen's loyalty lay.

Mission had pulled her head from her pillow to meet the sad eyes of her friend. Zalbaar patted her back gently, an accomplishment for the mighty Wookiee as he comforted his friend. The words Revan had spoke cut all of them deeply, and the Wookiee was beginning to wonder about the life-debt he had sworn to the former Lord of the Sith.

Revan watched the display with an emotionless mask, leaving the two alone as he sought the rest of the crew. Carth had locked himself in the cockpit, since Malak had taken up residence in the Ebon Hawk's common room. Juhani had eagerly abandoned her small corner in favor of the cargo bay. There, Revan watched as the Cathar forced herself through a rigorous exercise in the seven main lightsaber stances. Revan left, saying nothing. There was nothing for him to say. He had made his position clear and no one should doubt that.

Canderous was working diligently on HK-47. Something that did not bother Revan since the Mandalorian seemed to know his way around the assassin droid. T3-M4 stood vigil, beeping incomprehensively every once in a while as it witnessed the repairs.

"What do you think?"

Canderous finally asked, his gray eyes turning from the rust-colored droid's plating to Revan's face.

"I think its time Mandalore returned..."

Revan replied cryptically. Canderous smirked, feeling elation at the thought. If there was to be another Mandalore, he had no doubt of who it would be. Revan had earned the right in blood and battle, and Canderous would follow him to whatever end they would make, for he knew it would be a glorious one and he was glad, genuinely glad that Revan had not forgotten where he came from. That the former Jedi and Sith Lord would turn to his own people to fight whatever the threat was he had spoken of with the Ordo throughout their journey.

Jolee was no where to be found, Revan had a feeling his reference to the old Jedi's fallen wife had hurt him. Revan eyed the cockpit seal a moment, shaking his head. Speaking with Carth almost always turned into an argument. It wasn't really worth it.

Bastila awoke several hours after the decision, startled as she rose, frantically searching for her weapon. Her heartbeat lowered some where she laid her gloved hand against the saberstaff's cylinder and she slowly rose, feeling like she had been struck with a pulse of Force lightning. Revan was not there, something that worried Bastila. The apprentice of the Sith Lord slowly moved through the Ebon Hawk, finding who she sought rather easily.

Revan was standing at the center of the Ebon Hawk's common room, staring at a glowing holo of what she believed was Corellia. Frowning, Bastila slowly made her way to his side, her brow shooting up in surprise.

"What is going on?"

She asked, grateful something had occupied his thoughts. She just wanted to know he was alive, to be able to sense the ripples in the Force around him as they responded to his commanding presence. Revan's eyes did not leave the holo as he rubbed his chin, his arms crossed over his chest.

"Something bad..."

Revan sighed, slowly turning to Bastila. The former Padawan slowly lowered the barriers she had kept up in their bond, not wanting to look into his eyes.

"I- I killed you."

Revan reached out, running his hand gently along Bastila's cheek and tilting her head so he could look into her eyes.

"You did more than that..."

Revan said emotionlessly. Bastila saw a flicker in his eyes, something she had never seen before directed at her by this man. As soon as it was there, it was gone, but Bastila knew that Revan resented her, was angry with her. If she were more aware of her surroundings she would have noticed Malak eyeing them curiously from a corner as he rubbed a kolto salve into the wound where his jaw once was and replace his faceplate.

"I'll tell you... some day what that was, but right now there are more important matters..."

Bastila knew exactly why he was closing himself from their bond, no matter how much she didn't like it, she knew she deserved worse and remained quiet as Revan turned back to the holo.

"The Republic nineteenth fleet under the guidance of one Jedi Master Vrook Lamar led a contingent of Jedi Knights against a Sith force that was occupying Corellia... The Sith were killed to the last..."

Revan could sense his attitude was bothering Bastila. It was good, she was acknowledging her conscience. The easy part had been getting her to stop trying to kill him, the hard part would be sending her back to the Jedi, to a path he himself had forsaken and sought to destroy until those few clarifying moments that seemed to span an eternity. When he had seen the clarity and contentment of the Force.

"What do you wish to do, Bastila? Do you wish to continue being a Sith? Do you wish to return to the Jedi and face judgement, or do you with to wander in self Exile?"

Revan wasted no time, things were not going well. His reinforcements, his vanguard that he wished to lead against the True Sith was defeated even before they could take up weapons with him and time was being wasted. Had he been more mindful of the here and now he would have seen that he was forsaking Bastila, for none of the options he offered her were his path.

"I do not wish to stay with the Sith... and I do not wish to be shunned by Jedi and Sith alike..."

Bastila began, sighing dejectedly. Revan would have wondered why he did not feel torn in two, why he did not try to comfort her, but he didn't. There was a war to fight and he was falling back into the soldier's life. One couldn't afford the luxury of love when one faced impossible odds.

"Let the Republic burn. Let the Jedi sunder themselves with their foolishness."

Malak's mechanical voice spat as the Sith Lord stood from his corner. Bastila ashened, her eyes wide as she turned to face Malak. Malak merely rolled his eyes, leaving the two with some privacy.

"I wish to... to return before the Jedi Council... I wish to face judgement for my actions..."

She had her fair share of guilt, Revan knew she would forever be doomed to replay the moment she had taken his life from him, and the moment she had taken his redemption from him. Something he did not think possible, for he had thought Bastila had been his redemption but as he felt himself join his fallen comrades, his brothers and sisters in the Force, he had seen the evils that remained behind, unchallenged. Ones he would have fought had he lived. Then he had been torn from the Force, fearing in that instant that he was being sent into the oblivion of the Darkside, he had confessed before the Force and his Jedi predecessors his sins and had begged for a chance to redeem himself.
Bastila's hand found his, Revan jumped with a start from his own thoughts. His barriers had slipped an instant and Bastila had felt what he had, seen what he saw and heard what he had been thinking.

"It is foolish of me to ask... but why do you hate me so?"

Bastila sighed, tears building in her eyes. Revan felt his anger and despair diminish at the sight as he reached a hand forward, capturing a tear as it fell from her azure eyes. For a moment, all he did was stare at the droplet of water, his body beginning to tremble.

"It is not you I hate... I forgave you the moment I looked into your eyes..."

Revan did not say the rest.

"It is myself that I hate. I have endured so much pain and hardship, done so many evil things, fought so many enemies and friend... Betrayed so many.. What have I become in all this?"

Bastila blinked, wondering why he had simply stopped speaking and was cupping her cheek. Then he moved forward, kissing her gently and she no longer wondered, she no longer questioned and for a moment, she no longer cared. They were back in the Room of a Thousand Fountains before this terrible war, the taint of the Darkside and their own sins far from them. Before it could progress any further, Revan broke away, brushing another tear from Bastila's eyes.

"You are my conscience, Bastila. You are my wisdom. Never make me doubt that again..."

She knew he was referring to her fall. The stab of guilt was physically taxing and she struggled to remain standing on her own power as another tear slid down her cheek. Revan allowed this one its course, resting his head against Bastila's and staring into her pained eyes. In a few months, everything they knew would change. There would no longer be Darth Revan or Darth Malak's Sith Empire closing in on the Republic. There would no longer be the hidden threat of the Yuuzhan Vong looming over them. There would no longer be the Order that had been the Republic's guardians and peacekeepers for a thousand generations. There would no longer be a Republic.