Weakness
By The Ambitious Blank
Disclaimer- Naruto is not mine. This fic is purely for entertainment purposes.
Comments- ItaSasu-ish, sort of. Warnings are for violence. This can be read as either very vaguely shounen-ai or not, it's totally up to you how you want to translate it. Spoilers for the Uchiha clan's past.
---
The Uchiha clan is full of idiots.
This was the mantra of Uchiha Itachi.
Every single day, it was the same boring speech from the adults around him. "For the clan!" They would cry mindlessly. Clones of each other, all of them, sporting the "proud" Uchiha fan on every article of their clothing. Like lemmings approaching the edge of the cliff, each generation copied the previous, and no one saw that their sheep-like attitudes were going to lead them to destruction.
It was sickening.
"For the clan," his peers would say. Itachi grew to hate them.
"For the clan," his father would say. Itachi grew to hate him even more.
"For the clan," Itachi would grind out through clenched teeth. He grew to hate himself most of all.
Once, even Uchiha Shisui had lost his defiant attitude and took up the cry of "for the clan". Shisui, who was Itachi's best friend. Shisui, who had been called "cloud-headed" by the adults, since he was always daydreaming. Shisui, who thought up the most absurd ideas in the world, and was the only one who could make Itachi smile with so little effort.
Shisui, who eventually took up the same monotonous cry.
Shisui, who Itachi came to hate for turning on him.
Shisui, who paid for his betrayal at Itachi's hands.
Itachi looked around at the world he lived in, surrounded by the cries of "for the clan". He looked at it, and came to hate it, just as he hated his parents, just as he hated himself.
---
"Itachi, are you paying attention?"
Itachi looked up from the spot on the tatami floor where he was kneeling, his father's voice cutting through his thoughts like a knife through warm butter. He blinked once and nodded.
"Yes, father." He said quickly. It was a lie.
"I'm not sure what made you slip up today, Itachi. You are an elite shinobi, my progeny…"
Itachi shuddered in disgust.
"…and part of the most noble clan in Konoha, the Uchiha."
The teen's fingers tightened on the fabric of his pants, and he stared angrily at the woven mat in front of him.
"You do not make mistakes!"
Itachi said nothing.
"You do not slip up on an important mission!"
Itachi said nothing.
"You do not disgrace our clan's name with your clumsiness!"
Itachi's eyes rose, bleeding into the crimson Sharingan.
"…and you do not disgrace us all with your blindness!" He snarled. His father looked startled but then grew angry, drawing a hand back and smacking his son hard across the face. Itachi fell to the floor, a bruise already forming on his face.
"How… dare you speak ill of the clan…" His father hissed. Itachi wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, and started pushing himself to his feet. His father's foot came down hard on his spine, and shoved him back down. Itachi wheezed as all the air was forced out of his lungs, struggling to rise again and failing.
"My sons are disgraces to this noble bloodline. One cannot do the advanced jutsu at age eight, and the other does not know when to keep his mouth shut."
"If you want to see a disgrace, try looking at your own reflection, Father." Itachi spat venomously. His father's hand came down, yanking him up by his ponytail. Itachi's teeth clenched, his hands tightening into fists against the tatami. He bit down on his lip, determined not to make a sound, determined not to show weakness.
His eyes widened, however, when cold steel pressed to his neck. The Sharingan faded to black again.
"It's one thing to teach a child who has not yet used the Uchiha's jutsu. It is quite another to silence one who does not know when to keep thoughts to himself." His father said softly, in a voice dangerously low, holding the kunai against Itachi's jugular. "You are a danger to this clan, Itachi. You fill people's minds with your rebellious ideas… I cannot say for sure whether or not you have already reached your little brother with such idiocy.
"But I can keep you from speaking a rebellious word ever again," his father continued, still in that same voice, "because who would stop me, if I were to tear out your vocal cords, Itachi? If I told them you were speaking against the clan, they would agree with me. now… give me a good reason as to why I should not."
Itachi said nothing.
"Pledge allegiance to the Uchiha clan!"
Itachi said nothing. The kunai began to dig into his neck, and he could feel warm blood starting to seep from the shallow cut.
"SAY IT, ITACHI!"
Itachi said nothing. His fists clenched tighter, knuckles turning white, as he waited and prayed for a quick death. His father was furious with rage, his grip on Itachi's hair tightening, the steel digging deeper.
"Itachi!"
His mother's voice echoed down the hallway, footsteps rapidly approaching. Itachi was dropped unceremoniously onto the mats. He sat up quickly, wiping at his neck.
"One word of this," his father hissed, "and I will--"
The door opened. Itachi's mother stood there, wiping her hands on her apron.
"Itachi, good, you're back. Sasuke's been calling for you, he says he wants to show you something." She smiled, but it faded quickly when she saw the wound on his neck. Itachi's eyes followed hers, and he quickly put a hand to the wound.
"Mission." He explained. She sighed, and put her hands on her hips.
"Goodness, well… be more careful on your missions, alright? And take care of that before you go to see Sasuke. You do have the time, right? You're free this afternoon?" She tilted her head. Itachi glanced up at his father once, and then nodded silently.
"Aa." He answered. She beamed.
"Good. I'm a little tired tonight, so I'll just make some udon for dinner, is that alright with you?" She asked, dropping her apron again. Itachi nodded again and rose, bowing to his father with one hand over the wound on his neck, stepping out into the hallway past his mother.
As Itachi disappeared into the bathroom, she sighed and nodded to her husband, then walked back toward the kitchen.
---
"'Niisan, what happened to your neck?" Sasuke looked up from the place where he was sitting in the tall grass behind the Uchiha clan's walls. He stood up, walking over to meet his brother, stumbling in a gopher hole and falling forward into Itachi's already waiting arms. He blushed a little.
"Sorry, 'Niisan. I'm clumsy." He said, embarrassed. Itachi shook his head and ruffled his brother's hair.
"I was too, at your age." He said, sitting down in the grass. The younger boy gave him a doubtful look as he climbed into his lap.
"You were not, liar. But what happened to your neck?" He reached out with a small hand and poked it. Itachi flinched a little, and Sasuke frowned with worry.
"Mission." Itachi said with a small shrug. Sasuke shot him another doubtful look, and Itachi had to suppress a bitter smile. Of all people, his little brother was the only one who could really tell when he wasn't being truthful.
"You're really bad at lying, 'Niisan." Sasuke said softly, snuggling against Itachi's chest. Itachi lifted a hand, it hovered briefly over his little brother's shoulder, and then fell away again. Sasuke didn't notice.
There was a brief moment of silence that fell over the field where they were sitting, and then Sasuke spoke again, softly.
"…was it Dad…?"
Itachi's eyes widened, but he quickly hid the surprise on his face.
"I don't know what you mean, Sasuke." He said, calmly. Sasuke gave a little growl and sat up so that he was straddling Itachi's legs, and glared up at his older brother's face.
"Don't lie! Stop lying! It was Dad, wasn't it?" He demanded shrilly. "You're too good at being a ninja, you shouldn't have any wounds on you at all after missions! He was so mad at you before you got back… heard from a messenger that you messed up. Why did you let him hurt you, 'Niisan?" Sasuke's voice began to crack, and he wiped at his eyes. Itachi stared at him, unable to hide his shock at how perceptive his little brother was. He slowly raised a hand and gently rubbed the younger boy's damp cheek.
"Hey, don't cry, Sasuke…" he said as soothingly as he could, "…oi. Look at me." He tilted Sasuke's face up toward him. "Father… doesn't scare me, okay? He threatened me with all sorts of silly, useless things. He just doesn't like the way I talk."
"Then why don't you just stop talking that way?" Sasuke asked, confused. Itachi sighed.
"Because I don't want to become another one of those clones back in there." He gestured back toward the painted walls of the Uchiha clan's area of the village. "I don't want to always do things for the clan. I want to do things for myself. Do you understand?"
"I think so." Sasuke said thoughtfully. "Yeah, Dad always talks about how everything's for the good of the clan." He shifted and leaned against Itachi's chest again, snuggling into the warmth. "It's kind of annoying."
Itachi gave a soft chuckle, resting his hand on Sasuke's shoulder this time.
"Yeah…" he mused quietly, "…it really is, isn't it?"
There was another long silence, and then Sasuke suddenly leaned up and pressed his lips to the bandage over Itachi's neck. The older boy flinched, startled, and raised a hand to the spot. Sasuke only giggled.
"Mom says if you kiss a place where it hurts, it'll make it better twice as fast!" He chimed, earning the smallest of smiles from his bigger brother.
"Oh! I almost forgot!" Sasuke yelped, scrambling off Itachi's lap and scurrying toward the tree line, returning with an old, rusty cage. He made sure to dodge the gopher hole this time, and held the cage up proudly.
"I caught a fox today, all by myself!" He said, positively beaming with pride. Itachi blinked and peered into the cage. Sure enough, a small, orange, and rather shaken-looking fox stared back at him. Sasuke set the cage down and then plopped into the grass, looking down at his quarry, who settled down now that the cage wasn't been disturbed, padding around in circles. The younger Uchiha poked a finger between the thin bars, and the fox trotted over to investigate, sniffing at the digit and then taking a small bite, earning a shout as the finger was yanked away. Itachi smiled and shook his head, reaching out and taking his brother's wrist gently in his hand.
"Does it hurt?" He asked. Sasuke nodded, struggling to fight back tears. Itachi kissed the spot where the fox had left teeth marks, and Sasuke managed a watery smile.
"Thanks, 'Niisan."
---
Twenty minutes later, Sasuke and Itachi were still sitting in the same field, with Sasuke settled back on Itachi's lap. By then they'd managed to get the fox to calm down enough to let Sasuke slip his fingers between the bars and scratch it behind its ears. The boy himself was starting to get sleepy, nodding off every once in a while, waking up whenever the fox yipped at the birds that occasionally settled down in the tall grass.
"Sasuke?" Itachi asked, tentatively. Sasuke jerked awake and quickly looked up at his older brother, blinking the tiredness from his eyes.
"Yes?"
"Why do adults talk so needlessly?" The older boy asked, softly.
"What do you mean?" The younger returned, frowning.
"I mean… you hear Dad all the time, going off on how the clan's the only thing that matters. It's not just him, it's everyone… all the adults around here, wasting breath on needless words and useless opinions. Why do they all do that?"
"Adults don't know anything." Sasuke said simply, and Itachi smiled.
"Maybe."
"They don't see anything. They're too busy with their noses in the air to see what else is happening."
"You think so?" Itachi asked, again caught off-guard by his brother's simple intelligence.
"Well, that's how it seems, right?" Sasuke asked, tilting his head to one side. "I mean… Dad and the others are always saying that the clan's the only important thing. But it's kind of silly. What kind of stupid person forgets to take care of themselves before they take care of other people?"
"It does seem a little pointless." Itachi agreed. "They talk like we're the best people in the world, but they're all too wrapped up in thinking that we're the best, that they forget to look at other people around them… a clan's just a bunch of people with the same surname. It doesn't mean anything unless you can prove it."
"Well, we were probably the best a long time ago, or something, right? Maybe some older Uchiha proved that we were the best a long, long time ago."
"Maybe we still are."
"That's no reason to forget to take care of just yourself for once." Sasuke said with a scowl, reaching out to pet the fox again.
"You're right." Itachi said, ruffling his brother's hair, much to the younger boy's displeasure. "Let's go back, okay? Mom's probably got dinner ready."
Sasuke nodded and rose, picking up the fox's cage and following Itachi back toward the painted walls.
---
Later that night, Itachi lay back on his bed, staring up at the ceiling in the darkness of the room. Everything that he and Sasuke had talked about ran through his mind over and over.
Sasuke had been right, however. Itachi had always hated the clan for insisting that the individual didn't matter. But the adults never listened to him, always too far gone in their illusions to hear any reason.
"Idiots. All of them." Itachi muttered, rolling over on his bed to stare at the wall.
A small photograph stared back at him, a picture of himself, just after Sasuke had been brought home from the hospital. Itachi had almost been afraid of the crying infant as his mother held Sasuke, wrapped up in a myriad of blankets, out to him. Itachi had taken the child reluctantly, and held his little brother in his arms for the first time. The infant had paused as he'd looked up into his older sibling's face and stopped crying, staring with wide eyes as dark as Itachi's own. A tiny hand had stretched out and poked Itachi directly in the nose, and the small bundle had exploded into a fit of giggling.
Itachi sighed with a small smile. As soon as their father had snapped the photo, Sasuke had started crying again.
The teenager rose from his bed, walking over to the picture and plucking it off the wall, staring at it for a moment.
"Why is it that amongst a group of renowned shinobi, the smallest child in this entire clan is the only one that speaks wisely?" He wondered softly to himself, running his fingers over the glass on the frame of the photograph. He looked around the room again, at the Uchiha fan that was hung on his wall. His eyes narrowed, and he reached out and tore it away, ripping through the frail center of the fan and tossing it aside.
It's all meaningless… this life, this family, this clan… none of it means anything.
Itachi's hand had tightened on the photograph so much that the glass began to crack between his fingers. His other hand fisted at his side, knuckles whitening as he remembered his father's threats from earlier that day.
Rip out my vocal cords, you say, Father?
The Sharingan appeared in Itachi's dark irises, glowing faintly in the moonlit room.
You can't do a thing to me if I eliminate you first. If the only thing you think about is the clan, then you don't stand a chance against someone who thinks and feels for himself.
A hand reached out and grasped the hilt of a katana that was propped against the wall in the corner of the room. A blade was withdrawn from the sheath, shimmering as it reflected the beams of light streaming from the window.
Pointless things should be eradicated.
"Nii-san?"
The silence was shattered by the soft, heartbroken voice. Itachi whirled around, the sword falling onto his bed, muffled by the blankets. A pair of wide, dark eyes watched it fall, and Sasuke looked up at his older brother helplessly.
"What are you doing? There's no missions…" The child said, his voice trembling. Itachi grimaced.
"No. There isn't, Sasuke."
"So what are you doing then?"
"…" Itachi didn't answer.
"Nii-san… you weren't… going to hurt anyone, were you?"
Itachi glared at the floor, feeling his will starting to crack at the shaking in his little brother's voice. Sasuke managed to sound so horribly betrayed and upset that it was making Itachi's heart sink. He gripped his chest with one hand, struggling to ignore it.
"Nii-san..!" That horrible voice begged insistently.
"No!" Itachi finally cried, whirling around and causing the younger boy to scuttle back from him fearfully, "I wasn't going to hurt anyone, alright! I swear!"
Itachi fell to his knees in front of his little brother, his hands on Sasuke's shoulders. Sasuke stared at him, unable to find any words. Itachi gripped him tightly for a moment, battling the sheer frustration that Sasuke could always manage to bring about.
After all, no one else could bring Uchiha Itachi to his knees like that.
"Go back to bed, Sasuke. Please." Itachi said softly, his voice cracking. Sasuke hesitated for only a second, leaning in and pecking his older brother on the cheek before obediently fleeing back down the hallway toward his room.
Itachi rose slowly back to his feet and padded out into the main room of the house. A soft rustling noise made him flinch, and he looked down to see the cage with Sasuke's fox still inside. The kit pawed at the door and looked at Itachi pleadingly, making the Uchiha sigh, pick up the cage, and head outside.
The night was cool and breezy, and the stars sparkled brilliantly overhead, pinpricks of light against an ominous black sky. The moon shone overhead, a crescent of silver, and illuminated the field where Itachi and Sasuke had sat earlier that day. Itachi set down the cage near the tree line and opened the door. The fox kit slunk out, looking nervously over its shoulder, and then with a final bolt, exited the cage completely. It stopped a few steps away and looked back at Itachi with a pair of wide, dark eyes.
Itachi flinched, staring at the fox. That expression… it reminded him of Sasuke. Sasuke… who had managed to stop him from getting the revenge he wanted so badly. Sasuke, who's words could bring him to his knees. Sasuke…the one thing keeping him from his goals, the single thing that could make him so frustrated he wanted to turn the sword on himself, rather than those who actually deserved it.
The fox yelped as Itachi reached out and caught it by a hind leg, dragging it back toward him.
He snapped its neck.
--End.
Author's Note: Yeah. So. Not-so-happy ending, sorry. XD Hope you liked it, at least.
-TAB