Love and Marriage

Chapter Twenty

"Ok easy now." Sam exclaimed, helping Martin lay down on the couch. Once he had his body on the couch she took a few pillows from the chairs nearby. She placed one of the pillows underneath his injured leg and then put the other two behind his head. "Are you comfortable?"

"Yeah." He nodded. "Thanks."

"No problem." She gave him a small smile.

The car ride home from the hospital was awkwardly silent but now that they were home he wondered if they would be able to talk. They really needed to.

"Do you need anything? Something to drink?" Sam asked as she looked around for the remote control. She soon spotted it on the table behind the couch and retrieved it, placing it within Martin's reach.

"I'm fine." He replied. "I do really appreciate everything you've been doing for me the past couple of days."

She shrugged it off. "It's nothing."

"No it's something—at least it is to me." He corrected her. "It's means a lot to me that you've been here and helping."

Where else would she have been? She'd have to be heartless to not do anything she could to help him. He was shot. That took precedence over any problems they were having.

"Do you have to go back to work now?"

"No. I took the whole day off." She explained. "It was easier than having to leave to pick you up and then again to go see Leslie." Even though that was one of the reasons she took the day off, it wasn't the only one. She didn't feel right leaving him here alone on the first day he got out of the hospital. She had been shot in the leg before and knew exactly how painful it was to even move an inch. She wanted to be there for him in case he needed something. Tomorrow was the beginning of the weekend, so she'd be around during the day to help him for another couple of days before having to go back to work. Maybe by then he would be feeling better.

He wondered if that was the only reason she was staying home with him or if she just didn't want to leave him home alone but he didn't press the issue. "Do you have anything that you need to do right now?"

"Um, not really." She replied. "I thought about doing some laundry…"

"Can it wait?" He asked.

"Why?" She knew that as soon as they got home he'd want to talk. Even though she knew that they should talk, she didn't want to ruin the friendly atmosphere they had right now.

"I think you know that we need to talk." He explained.

"Yeah," she sighed, "I just don't want to end up fighting again."

"Well I don't either." He gave her a smile. "See? We're not fighting; we're agreeing on things."

She let out a small laugh. "But we haven't started talking about the things that we usually fight about yet."

"True." He nodded. "I guess we don't have to talk right now, but I thought that now would be a good time to try Leslie's assignment again. Claire's not here."

He did make a good point and she knew that they would have to talk eventually. There was no point in delaying the inevitable. "Ok. We'll try this talking thing that Leslie's so gung-ho about."

"Great." He was glad to see that she was willing to talk. It was a good first step.

She stood there watching him and waiting for him to begin, but there was just silence because they were each waiting for the other person to start talking. After a few moments she sat down on the coffee table and placed her hands in her lap.

"I guess I'll start." Martin finally spoke up when he realized that Sam wasn't going to speak first. "I heard what you said to me."

"I've said a lot of things to you, Martin." She pointed out. "Could be a little more specific?"

"Oh, sure. Sorry" He smiled. "I heard what you said to me when you thought that I was asleep because of the pain medication." He paused for a moment. "I heard you say that you love me."

She nervously started wringing her hands together while they rested in her lap. "Oh. You heard that."

"Yeah." He nodded.

She kept her eyes focused on her hands. "I meant it."

"I know." He told her. "And I know that I haven't told you this in a long time but I love you too."

"Really?" She whispered, almost unable to believe it.

"Absolutely. He assured her.

She bravely looked up at him and allowed their eyes to meet. She could see it in his eyes that he was being truthful with her. It'd just be so long since she'd heard those words coming from him.

"Well I guess since we're confessing things, I should confess something to you." She took a deep breath before continuing. "Earlier in the day before you got shot, I came down to talk to you. I found you talking with Danny and I overheard part of your conversation."

"Which part?" He asked, sincerely hoping that she stayed around to hear the last part. The last part was the only positive thing he said the entire time.

"The bad part." Sam replied. "I left after I heard you say that you weren't sure why we got married in the first place."

"Oh." He could only imagine how hard that was for her to hear. He didn't mean it; he was just frustrated. "Sam, I'm sorry. I didn't…"

She held up her hand to stop him from continuing. "You don't have to be sorry or apologize for how you feel. It's ok."

"I was just venting and I didn't mean it." He needed her to understand that. "You didn't hear what I said after that, did you?"

"No." She shook her head. "Danny told me though."

"I meant that part." He reached out to take a hold of her hand. "I can't picture my life without you in it; I don't want to."

Hearing him say that to her made her heart melt and she could feel herself wanting to cry. At least the tears were because of happiness this time. She placed her other hand on top of his, giving it a little squeeze. "I don't want you out of my life either."

A huge smile formed on his face. "I'm glad to hear that."

"So since we have that established, what do we do now?"

He only knew one thing. "We continue seeing Leslie and start talking more. Rebuild our relationship."

She didn't want to seem like she was a pessimist, but she felt like she had to ask. "Do you really think we can? We've been so distant from each other and fighting so much. Is it even possible to get back what we had before? 'Cause I want to get it back but how are we supposed to do it?"

"I don't know how." He told her honestly. "I don't have the answers. But I think the fact that we've been talking and have yet to fight is a good sign. Don't you?"

"Yeah." She replied softly, nodding her head. "Maybe we just take things one day at a time?"

"Sounds like a good plan." He smiled.