-Chelsea's POV-
As we neared the gates to the Mines, I heard Gandalf call to Frodo. "Frodo! Come and help an old man."
Frodo hurried over to Gandalf, who put his arm around him. (AAAH HOBBIT MOLESTER!…moving right along.). Being the naturally curious girl I am, I snuck up behind them, sniggering silently.
"…the Ring? You feel its power growing, don't you? I've felt it too. You must be careful now. Evil will be drawn to you from outside the Fellowship. And, I fear, form within," Gandalf muttered. (Bwahahaa, I have super-elfish-hearing powers. FEAR ME, MORTALS!). Boromir walked by meanwhile, and Gandalf eyed him suspiciously. Frodo's paranoia looks increased, and Boromir glared at them. I felt so bad for him, I felt the urge to glomp him or…tell him he's loved or hit him with a beanbag. Something.
Anyway, after he passed, Frodo whispered: "Who then do I trust?"
Me, I'm not after a shiny piece of metal. It is metal, isn't it? It can't be real gold…
"You must trust yourself. Trust your own strengths."
"What do you mean?"
…real gold would be really expensive. Hey…MOSES! MOSES! M-O-A-OZIS! "There are many powers in this world for good or for evil. Some are greater than I am-" …geez, isn't that just a wee bit egomaniacal? Ah, whatever. It's not my ego… "…and against some I have not yet been tested…"Gandalf sighed.
"I HAVE A CHILD!" I yelled. Out loud. The entire Fellowship, sans Jamie, turned to look at me strangely. I picked up a rock from the ground and held it out proudly. "His name is Larry Christine."
Legolas gave me a look that clearly stated he believed I should be locked up somewhere.
Eventually, we came to a dark hall with a lake. Gimli hit the wall with his axe. "Dwarf doors are invisible when closed," he stated proudly. I rolled my eyes, as did Leggy and Jamie.
"Yes, Gimli, even their own masters cannot find them if their secrets are forgotten," Gandalf said.
"Like locker combinations?" I was ignored, as always.
"Why does that not surprise me?" Legolas smirked.
"GAAHAHAHAHAA! You have some intelligence about you, Leggy-bo-Beggy!" I laughed like a loon.
"Yes…we elves have superior wit, Lady-"
"You did not just say that," I said quietly.
"…?"
"YOU ARE NOT WITTY, LEGOLAS! I AM THE ONE WHO IS GREATER THAN OR EQUAL TO WITTY! IF YOU TRY TO STEAL THAT FROM ME, I WILL HAVE THE B-…YOU KILLED! BY WARNER, MY MANSERVANT!" I shrieked as the Fellowship tried to shut me up. Heehee, Moulin Rouge-ness.
Jamie scowled. "Geez, Jamie, he's your Hot Elvish Hunk o' Loooooove. I have no plans of stealing him…yet."
Legolas gave me an odd look, and moved up in line, away from me. Gandalf was inversely looking along the stone wall for something.
"What's wrong?" I whispered to Jamie.
"You made me tell Gimli I loved him."
"Jeezum, I know, PEF. And it was all in rewards," I shook my head.
"What in the name of Jimmie Johnson's race car are you talking about?!" she growled.
I shrugged. "C'mon, Future Princess of Mirkwood. You can't stay mad at me forever…I'm the only one who knows about Paris of Troy and Jimmie Johnson in this entire UNIVERSE."
"Hmph."
"And I'm the only other one who has both caffeine and the February issue of Teen People."
"…point taken."
"So…forgiven?"
"Sure. Can I have some caffeine stash now?"
"Oh, would you look at that…" I grinned, sprinting over to Gandalf, who was announcing:
"Ithildin! It mirrors only starlight and moonlight…"
As if on cue, the clouds parted and Jamie and I shouted "THE MOONLIGHT SHOWS US FOR WHAT WE REALLY ARE!". Then burst into hysterical fits of laughter.
"Quiet!" Aragorn snapped. Heh.
"It reads: The Doors of Durin, Lord of Moria. Speak friend, and enter"," Gandalf continued, paying no mind to any of us. The door now glowed with a substance that resembled moonlight. I stared on in quiet admiration (for once).
"What do you suppose that means?" Merry said, looking cute and nothing like Charlie: Bloody Rawk Gawd.
"Oh, it's quite simple. If you are a friend, you speak the password and the doors will open," Gandalf said (with me mouthing the words mockingly behind him. Jamie sniggered). He continued with some magic stuff (not resembling "EXPECTO PATRONUUUUUMM!", sadly), and magically…the gates remained closed. I cackled loudly, and went to stake out by a spot by a lovely tree (by hobbits. Squee!)
What seemed like hours passed. Pippin, Merry, and I were on our 142nd round of "Rock, Paper, Scissors". Pippin sighed.
"Nothing's happening."
Gandalf was irritated. "I once knew every spell in the tongues of Elves, Men, and Orcs…"
I snuck up behind him: "YOU'RE GETTING OOOOOOLD!"
"SILENCE!" he roared, going all Almighty Wizard on me. I was thrown back a couple feet.
"Idiot…"
"He doesn't take aging well, does he?" Jamie snickered.
"What are you going to do then?" Pippin asked Gandalf.
"KNOCK YOUR HEAD AGAINST THESE DOORS, PEREGRIN TOOK! AND IT THAT DOES NOT SHATTER THEM, AND I AM ALLOWED A LITTLE PEACE FROM FOOLISH QUESTIONS, I WILL TRY TO FIND THE OPENING WORDS!" he roared again. He muttered some stuff, and Pippin slouched. Jamie was saying goodbye to Bill with Aragorn and Sam. Horsey person.
I slouched over to Pippin and put my arm around him. "Don't worry. We can be Gandalf-Hated Outcasts together!" I sighed. He smiled. I love that hobbit.
More minutes passed. Merry and Pippin were throwing stones in the water. Pippin was about to throw one in, but Aragorn held out his arm. "Do not disturb the water."
God, what was it? Hate Pippin Day?
I walked over.
"Aragorn, you shouldn't be rude to Pippin, do you know why?"
"I wasn't being-"
"Do you know why?"
"Why?" he said, looking bored.
"Because-" dramatic pause "-I love you."
He sighed, and Jamie laughed.
"Go aggravate Gandalf, Chelsea."
"Righto!" I said, skipping off, humming "Seven Deadly Sins" by Flogging Molly.
"Oh, it's useless," Gandalf muttered, throwing down his staff and hat and sitting down.
"Let me take a whack at it!" I grinned, stepping in front of the door. "Open sesame!" No response. "Begun by blood, by blood undone!" Silence. "Yup, it's useless."
Frodo stepped forward. "It's a riddle…speak "friend" and enter. What's the Elvish word for friend?"
"COPINE! NO…AMI! NO…MELON!" I screeched. Gandalf rolled his eyes, Barbossa-style.
"Mellon."
The doors opened.
"WE WIN DOUBLE JEOPORDY!" I cheered. We entered the mines as Gimli prattled on.
"…roaring fires! Malt beer! Ripe meat off the bone!" Here, Jamie interjected with an "Ew." Gimli continued, paying no mind. "…is the home of my cousin, Balin! And they call it a mine. A MINE!"
Boromir looked around. "This is no mine…it's a tomb."
Being the short-term-memory type of person I am, I had forgotten about the Dead Things. Actually, I realized I had forgotten almost every plot line. It was unnerving to say the least.
I looked down and saw dead things. Jamie put her foot down and it crunched through one of their skulls. She screamed. I jumped up into Boromir's arms (he was nearest, and I was unnerved like a spooked horse.).
"EW! THERE ARE DEAD…THINGS! And I touched them! EW! OH GOD EEEEWWWW!"
Jamie swayed for a moment, before she almost fell back. Luckily, Sir Legs-A-Lot was behind her and managed to catch her.
To sum everything up, it was Pandemonium Middle Earth Style. I was screaming my head off, Bormoir looked like he had a headache. Jamie was still out cold, Legolas searching for smelling salts (HA! I wish.). The hobbits were spazzing out, Aragorn and Gandalf trying to restore order (good luck), and Gimli was running about going "NOOO!"
Legolas glanced at an arrow on the ground. "Goblins!" he spat. Jamie woke up, and Boromir set me down and started rambling about the Gap of Rohan. I swayed for a moment as the Fellowship began to retreat.
You think you've seen chaos? Psh. Try figuring out what's going on when a giant squid starts attacking people and that person that he attacks is right next to you.
My only thought before screaming my head off again was, Ah crap, I'm going to have laryngitis tomorrow.
"AAAAAAH!" Frodo was yelling. Not that I'd blame him. I'd scream too if a freaky squid thing was threatening certain death. Heck, I was screaming NOW and the thing hadn't even touched me.
"FRODO!!!" Merry yelled.
"Frodo! Help!" Pippin shouted.
"STRIDER!" Ok, it was getting old now. Where's Mister Hero…?
I wandered about the caves, trying to find some way to help as Aragorn tried to save the day. The Hobbits were chopping at the Watcher in the Water with their swords. I could do that, but HEY! I don't have a sword! Grumble, grumble.
Somehow, Merry, Pippin, and Sam managed to free Frodo. It seemed safe for a minute, but the Thing burst out of the water again, getting Frodo for a second time. Leggy began shooting at the creature (which was his first time shooting in front of most of the Fellowship. I tried not to laugh. Really, I did.). So while the entire Fellowship except Gimli, Gandalf, Jamie, and me hacked at the Watcher, Aragorn cut off the offending tentacle and Boromir caught Frodo (he's just catching everyone today.).
"INTO THE CAVES!" Gandalf yelled.
"Legolas! Into the caves!" Boromir called out. I sniggered at the sheer wrongness of the words.
We all shuffled uncomfortably in the cave (which was currently blocked off by the Watcher). It was pitch black until Gandalf put a crystal-like object on his staff.
"Light bright!" I grinned.
"We must face the long dark of Moria. Be on your guard. There are older and fouler things than Orcs in the deep places of the world," Gandalf said, advancing forth with Gimli (who was practically bouncing up and down. Apparently, he forgot about his dead kinsmen.).
"You mean Ms. Koch's here?!" I said with fake enthusiasm.
"Mr. Nicolai too?" Jamie pitched in as we walked on.
"OH JOY!!" we screeched in false fangirlism.
Again, we were silenced by Men and Wizards with no sense of humor.
"Quietly, now. It is a four-day journey to the other side. Let us hope our presence will go unnoticed."
And so we journeyed.
We walked around for a while, and Gandalf blathered on about Mithril. I gave Frodo an appraising look. When no one was looking, I picked up a small, shiny rock from the ground and shoved it in my pack.
Then I realized something horrible.
I let out a muffled shriek, and the Fellowship turned around, weapons drawn.
"Chelsea? What is it?" Jamie said, looking worried. I couldn't speak for the fear that consumed me. How could this be? HOW?!
"There's…"
"What?"
"There's…"
"WHAT?!"
"THERE'S NO MORE GUM IN MY BACKPACK!" I yelled as softly as possibly, theatrically (unrealistically) breaking down and sobbing. The Fellowship sighed (bourgeois pigs.) and we walked on. And climbed on. Oh, joy.
After a while, we stopped in an area with three passages. "I have no memory of this place..." Gandalf muttered. "Hooray, we're lost," I sighed, plopping down by the Hobbits and Jamie.
"Are we lost?" Pippin questioned.
"No," Merry replied.
"I think we are."
"Well, it's too bad if we are lost, because we don't have a doctor and designated hero Jack, or a fugitive who likes to say "What?", or a crazy guy who used to work with boxes who can track like nobody's business, or a VH1 reject…or a Southern angry smoking antagonist!" I muttered to myself. Hee…I love Lost.
They continued their argument with no mind to me.
"Shh…Gandalf's thinking!"
Silence.
"Merry?"
"What?!"
"…I'm hungry."
I sighed, and in my generosity, I gave Pippin some Skittles. We snacked in silence as Jamie and Merry discussed the sheer insanity of their comrades.
Frodo and I spotted something moving at the same time, and cried out, "THERE'S SOMETHING DOWN THERE!" or "ARRR! THERE BE SOMETHING MOVIN' IN THE DEPTHS! ARRRR!"
"It's Gollum," Gandalf informed us. At this, I snuck off to Jamie.
"Jamie, look! Gollum!"
So while Gandalf chatted to Frodo about Gollum, pity, death, judgment, and all that good stuff, Jamie and I spied on Gollum. "We should go get him and hug him and squeeze him and call him Josephina!"
"His name is Gollum."
"…oh yeah."
"EH! It's that way!" Gandalf stated suddenly.
"He's remembered!" Merry grinned.
"No, but the air doesn't smell so foul down here. If in doubt, Meriadoc, always follow your nose…"
"Follow your nose! Wherever it goes!" I began to sing.
"Let us risk a little more light…"
The room lit up, and we were surrounded by tall, magnificent pillars and hallways. It was, in the words of Samwise Gamgee, "an eye-opener, and no mistake."
As we strolled through the hallways, Gimli suddenly spotted a doorway, and he ran to it. The next thing we heard was Gimli's sobbing. We entered to see him crying upon a tomb, it appeared. Gandalf walked over: "Here lies Balin, Son of Fundin, Lord of Moria. He is dead then. It is as I feared."
He handed Pippin his hat and staff while Gimli muttered something foreign. I took Gandalf's hat and put it on, Legolas scowling. After a minute, he turned to Aragorn. "We must move on. We cannot linger."
"LINGER BWAHAHHAHAHA!" That got everyone's attention. "Er…you've got me feeling hella good so let's just keep on dancing," I spoke somberly, dancing like a loon. It wasn't a minute later when I realized I was still wearing Gandy's hat.
Eep.
Gandalf sighed, and picked up a dead man's book. Serious disgusto factor there. He began to read:
"They have taken the bridge and the second hall. WE have barred the gates, but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes. Drums, drums in the deep. We cannot get out. A shadow movies in the dark. We cannot get out. They are coming."
Jamie's PoV
"…one ring to rule them…"
Who's them?
"EW!" I screamed, seeing the skeletons on the floor.
Before we even got a chance to go further, I fainted.
Three days we trudged on. Three days with very little food or sleep. On the night of the third day, I drifted into a deep and sound sleep…
When I awoke, I wasn't confused any longer. I knew what the dreams were reminding me of. I could tell no one.
A/N- Heh…sorry 'bout the PoVs and lengthy waits. . Been UBER busy lately. And please stick with this, as TTT is almost completed, writing wise, and it's turning out to be SO MUCH BETTER.
Reviewer Mercis-
Cosmos Senshi- Y'know…I kinda like htat idea. Latest it'll be is the RotK one. And yes, there will be a RotK. Even if it takes years to type the first installment …
TrekieGreenieShannaraElfOfME- LegolaslEGOlas Eggo. Just a weird little nickname ::snickers::.
Crecy- CAFFEINE FREE?! O! Well, the sad thing, I haven't had any Diet Coke for TWO WEEKS. I had to move over to Diet Sunkist. Probably why this took so long to get up…::sighs::.
TrekieGreenieShannaraElfOfME- One more chapter, then the kick-butt stuff starts. The seriously major kickbutt will come in later. But believe me, it's coming, and yes, it still is fangirly. C'mon, honestly, what do you expect? ::rolls eyes:: I'll try to edit that a bit though. And I'll try to insert a Gimli conversation. Soon.
TrekieGreenieShannaraElfOfME (again)- It'd be amusing, to say the least. Bwahaa…thanks for your (second) review!
Anonymous- I love you too. Oh, and by the way…::hands you dictionary:: Learn to spell. Thxbye.
AnimeGodess149- Wow. That's…er…different. Well, to each their own, I suppose. Thanks for your review!
The Fantastic Fangirls- I'd reply to yo, but I know you, and my fingers are protesting. Thanks anyway. And remember…chOColate.
sibbielee113- ::updates, hopefully humorously.:: Suggestions for fangirlism…?
A/N- Yeah. More coherent later. Still tired…::yawn::. And hopefully, updates won't be 5 months apart anymore. But by no means will this be discontinued. Slowed down, but not killed. And thanks for putting up for the absence over the months.
Cheers!