Love and Marriage

Chapter Forty

Leslie took one look at Martin and Samantha and knew that something wasn't right. They were both looking at anything in the room other than each other and were also avoiding her gaze too. Something bad had obviously happened to them and she had a suspicion that they had experienced a set back in their progress. She only hoped that it wasn't a major one—but was mentally prepared for it if it was a major one. "So, how are you both today?"

"Fine." Was the response that came from both Martin and Samantha.

"Fine?" Leslie questioned with a low chuckle. "Somehow I don't believe that. Does someone want to fill me in on what's going on?"

Sam hesitantly looked at Martin for a brief second before settling her gaze on Leslie. "I guess I will. After my session with you where I admitted how much I dislike my job, I went to look into the possibility of transferring. There's a job that's available and it's a good job. It's a job with a Missing Person's unit and it's also a promotion. But it's in Houston."

"I see." Leslie nodded.

Sam realized that she needed to tell the whole story, so she continued. "Martin was angry that I didn't tell him that I was looking into a transfer, but at the time we weren't really speaking. Then he got shot and with everything else going on it kind of slipped my mind until yesterday."

Leslie turned her head to Martin. "Are you still angry with her?"

"I don't want to be." He replied. "I guess part of my anger was because it was such a shock to me. That was the last thing I expected her to do."

"That's understandable." Leslie took a few notes.

"But now I can see her side of things." Martin continued. "She said that she wasn't looking for a job as a way to escape our marriage and I believe her."

"Good. Seems like you both solved that problem fairly well." Leslie pointed out. "So what's the problem now?"

"Now he's mad at me because I suggested that I take the job and have us all move there together." Sam added.

"You want to take the job?" Leslie questioned.

"Of course she does." Martin answered for Sam. "It's a job in Missing Person's and it's a promotion. She doesn't want to give that up because it's what she's wanted for so long."

"But it's in Texas and I don't want to go without my family." Sam interjected. "I thought that if we all moved there together it could be a fresh start. You know? New city, new job, new everything. We could put the past behind us and start over."

"But Martin doesn't want that?" Leslie guessed.

"No." Sam shook her head. "All I wanted him to do was think about it for a few days. I could deal with it if he said no after giving it some serious thought. Instead, he just refused to think about it and said no right away."

Leslie turned to Martin. "Why aren't you willing to give it some more serious consideration?"

He didn't really have a very good explanation so he just shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know."

"I think it would be a good idea for you to just think about it. That doesn't mean that you have to say yes or anything." Leslie told him. "What exactly are your objections to moving?"

"He doesn't want to leave New York." Sam answered for him.

"I don't want to up-root our life here and I especially don't want to make Claire have to move." He defended his position. "She'll have to make all new friends and go to a new school. She likes her friends here and she likes her school. Why make her change that?"

Leslie watched Martin speak about Claire but could see what his statements were really about. "While I'm sure you are truly worried about Claire, you're also worried about yourself though. Right?"

"A little." He admitted. "My family lives around here and all of our friends are here too. Besides, if we move to Houston, she'll have a job but I won't."

"So you're also worried about losing your job?" Leslie made she noted that.

"Of course he is." Sam answered for him. "It was ok for him to suggest we switch jobs because that way he still had a job in the FBI, but he's not ok with this because he'll lose his job."

"He tried to do what?" Leslie asked, surprised by this new piece of information.

"He tried to get the bureau to let me take his job in Missing Person's and then he would take over my job in White Collar. But they wouldn't do that." She paused. "It was a sweet thing to try and do though."

"Yes. I agree." Leslie nodded.

"I just wanted to make her happy." Martin replied, glancing over at Sam. "I don't want her to be unhappy with her job, but at the same time, I don't want to be unemployed either."

"I tried to tell him that he could get another job in Houston. It may take a few weeks, but he's a great agent and I'm sure they could find a place for him."

"Maybe I just don't want to go." He stated plainly. "Maybe I'm just not sure that moving away is the right way to solve our problems. If we leave New York we can't keep seeing Leslie as our marriage counselor and that would be a shame because I think she really knows how to get us to talk about everything we don't even know we need to talk about."

"While I appreciate the compliment, I can't take the credit for that. Both of you have made progress because you want to make progress. I have only guided you in the right direction. And believe me, there are plenty of good marriage counselors in Houston. In fact, I even have a colleague who I could refer you to if you should choose to move there."

"But do you really think that moving away is the best way to solve anything?" Martin asked. "Our problems won't stay here in New York. They'll follow us wherever we go. We could travel halfway around the world and they'll still be with us."

"That's true. You're problems will stay with you wherever you go." Leslie agreed. "However, as long as you acknowledge them and work on fixing them, I see no problem with moving to a new city and trying to make a fresh start. I've had many couples relocate after they have experienced hard times in their marriage and most of them do quite well."

"Only most of them?" Martin questioned.

"The ones who didn't do so well were the couples who simply ignored their problems. That's why I would recommend finding another marriage counselor to go see if you moved to Houston." Leslie explained further, watching Martin closely. He was hiding something, possibly another reason why he didn't want to move and she was determined to make him share. "Martin, besides Claire and your job issues, are there any other reasons why you don't want to move that you haven't shared?"

"Like what?" He asked.

"You tell me." Leslie shrugged.

He was silent for a moment, considering whether or not to bring this subject up. He didn't want to be accused on harping on this and beating a dead horse, but maybe it would be best to put everything out in the open. "Well…there is another reason."

"What would that be?" Leslie prodded.

"If we move to Houston, I know that we'll never have any more children." He replied, avoiding Sam's gaze and focusing on the floor. "Sam, we both know that if you get this promotion you'll use it as an excuse to put off having more children until the day will come when it's too late for us to have any more children."

"Is that true Samantha?" Leslie asked. "Would you use this job as an excuse not to have children?"

Sam thought about Martin's statement for a moment, shocked that he would say something like that to her. "I would like to think that I wouldn't do that." She kept her gaze on Martin, who was still staring at the floor. "The truth is I'm not sure I'll ever agree to have more children and if he can't understand why by now then he obviously hasn't been paying attention to me. It doesn't matter if I stay in New York or move to Texas, right now I don't see myself having more children. I'm not emotionally prepared for that and I'm not sure I could handle it."

He was hurt and disappointed that she didn't want any more children. Without thinking it through, he angrily spat out, "Then maybe you should just take the job in Houston and let me stay here with Claire. That way you can go out and further your career without the added baggage of a family."

She was surprised by the venom that was placed within his statement and couldn't believe that he suggested she take the job and leave her family behind.

Leslie was also shocked by Martin's statement and decided to intervene before Samantha said something that would further escalate this situation. "Martin, saying things like that is not the right way to solve this."

"Then what is the right way?" He exclaimed. "Huh? Tell me. What is the right way?"

"The right way to solve this involves staying calm and not yelling at each other because yelling will only make things worse." Leslie explained. "Now this is what it looks like to me. You basically have two choices. One, you can stay in New York with the jobs and the lives you have. Martin, you can keep your job that you like and Samantha, you can keep the job that you hate. Or two, you can move to Houston where Samantha will get a job that she would enjoy and Martin would be without a job."

"You forgot the third option of Sam moving there by herself." Martin interjected.

"Do you want me to leave?" Sam questioned him. "Is that what you want? Do you want out of this marriage?"

"I don't know." He shook his head. "But I know what I don't want. I don't want to keep doing this back and forth thing with you. One day we're getting back to normal and the next we're fighting again. I'm getting fed up with all this drama!"

"Well I don't like this drama either!" Sam exclaimed. "Maybe I should just…" She was going to agree that maybe she should just move to Houston and then they wouldn't fight anymore. She didn't mean it and she didn't want to move without her family; it was just the first thing that popped into her head and she found herself powerless to say whatever entered her brain.

"Whoa there!" Leslie interrupted, knowing what Samantha was going to say and stopping her from saying it. "Let's take a small time-out here, ok?" This conversation was going too far and they needed to stop before they said something that they would regret later. It seemed like they weren't able to talk to each other about this without saying something that she was certain they didn't really mean. But they had to communicate about this. A small smile formed on her face as she realized how to get them communicating without giving them an opportunity to fight with each other.

"I want you both to write a letter to each other. In this letter I want you to explain in detail why you want to or don't want to move. Cite your reasons and be honest with your feelings. Don't use accusatory language towards the other person. Keep it civil and make sure to include all of your reasons. Don't leave anything out. Once both of you have your letter written, I want you to exchange them, read them, and then talk about them. But I want that discussion to be civil and I want both of you to think about what you're saying before you say it. Don't blurt out something that you might regret later. Do you think you can do this?"

"Sure." Sam agreed.

"I guess so." Martin agreed.

"Great." Leslie smiled. She hoped they would be able to come to some kind of understanding regarding the Houston job and that this wouldn't push them father apart. "I'm hoping that maybe through these letters you can see the other person's perspective a little more clearly and that it might help you make your final decisions."

"It's worth a try." Sam sighed.