Love and Marriage
Chapter Sixty-One
I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done
The car ride to the airport was slightly awkward because everyone was lost in their own individual thoughts. Martin parked the car in the airport parking lot and helped Sam get the bags from he trunk. He had decided to go with them into the airport and spend as much time with them as he could before they reached the security checkpoint. Once they reached that, he couldn't go in without a ticket. He'd see them off from there.
Sam went to grab her suitcase, but found that Martin had already grabbed it for her. "Thanks." She found that she couldn't look him in the eye for fear that she would start crying.
And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Anyway from here
"No problem." He told her with a smile as they walked into the airport.
They waited in line together to get their boarding passes and to check their luggage. Once they got their boarding passes, they walked over to where the security checkpoint was. "Looks like this is where we part." Sam said softly.
"Yeah. I guess so." Martin nodded. He didn't want to let them go. He wanted her to suddenly change her mind and stay with him, but realized that wasn't going to happen. She was really leaving and he wasn't going to see them for a while. His only consolation was the fact that they would be reunited sometime soon—at least he hoped it was soon.
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
He kneeled down to Claire's level and gave her a big hug and kiss. "I love you so much Claire."
"I love you too daddy." Claire replied back as she hugged him tightly.
After hugging her for a few more moments, he reluctantly pulled away and stood up again to face Sam. He was dreading this moment since Sam first told him that she was going to leave. It was the moment of goodbye.
Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say
"So…" She said, looking around the airport. She thought that if she just looked anywhere but at him she could get through this without crying.
"So…" He echoed, unsure of what to say now.
To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do
She could feel the tears start to well up in her eyes and was proud that she had managed to keep them at bay for this long. She tried to give him a small smile in hopes of keeping the tears from flowing, but it didn't work. The tears flowed freely down her face anyway.
He couldn't stand to see her cry and wished he could do something to stop it. Reaching out to her, his hand gently wiped away the tears from her cheeks before wrapping her up in his arms. "It's ok." He whispered into her ear. "It's gonna be ok."
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
She closed her eyes and savored the moment, committing the way she felt when enveloped in his strong arms to her memory. "I love you Martin."
"I love you too Samantha." He told her, pulling away and placing a few soft kisses on her lips. When he pulled away, he placed another soft kiss on her forehead. "Call me when you land and let me know you got there safely?"
"Absolutely." She nodded, trying to pull herself together again. She couldn't fall apart completely—at least not right now. She had to be strong for Claire because she didn't want her daughter to see her cry.
Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say
He leaned in and placed another kiss on her cheek, whispering into her ear. "Take care of yourself."
"You too." She cupped his cheek with her hand and placed a kiss on his lips. This scene was getting too serious and she needed to say something to break the dark mood. "Don't resort to living like you did during your bachelor days."
"Oh yeah." He chuckled. "Sitting on the couch drinking a beer and flipping between ESPN and the X-Files. Those were some wild times."
Slower slower
We don't have time for that
I just want to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads
She laughed and gave him a small smile. He was trying to be supportive of her decision to leave even though it was obvious to her that this was hurting him just as much as it was hurting her—maybe even more because Claire was leaving too. She could see it in his eyes that he didn't want her leave. He was looking at her like he was a death row inmate waiting for a last minute reprieve from the governor. Unfortunately, he wasn't going to get the reprieve he was looking for. She was still going to leave.
Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess
"Well…goodbye."
"Goodbye." He put on a big smile even though he didn't feel happy. The smile was mostly for Claire.
Claire smiled back at her daddy and waved. "Bye daddy."
"Bye sweetie." He said, watching as they entered the security checkpoint area. Before they rounded the corner, he saw Sam turn her head back to look at him one more time. Their eyes locked and she mouthed the words 'I love you'. For a brief moment he considered running through the checkpoint and dragging her back home with him. But that plan was flawed and he knew it. So he simply watched as they disappeared into the crowd of people at the busy airport. It usually took a lot for him to cry, but he wasn't surprised when a single tear flowed down his cheek.
Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear
Sam sat at the gate with Claire in the seat right next to her. Claire had been quiet for a while and she was getting worried. "Are you ok?" She asked.
"Yeah." Claire replied with a small nod.
Sam knew that her daughter wasn't ok and knew what the problem was. "I'm sorry sweetie."
Claire looked over at her. "For what?"
"For making you move." Sam answered. "For making you leave the only life you've ever known and making you come with me to a strange city. I know this isn't easy for you and I hope that you aren't mad at me for it." With everything that had been going on with packing and getting ready to move, they hadn't gotten a chance to really sit down and discuss this together. While the gate of an airport wasn't exactly the most ideal place to have a heart to heart, it would have to do for now.
"I'm not mad at you mommy." Claire told her. "I'm just sad about leaving daddy."
She wrapped her arm around Claire's shoulder, tucking her in closer to her body. "I know you're sad about leaving your daddy behind. I am too. But it won't always be like this."
"That's what you keep telling me." Claire whispered.
"I love you Claire." She placed a kiss on the top of her daughter's head.
"Love you too." Claire replied.
"Flight 4763, nonstop service to Houston is now boarding all passengers in seats 1-15 at Gate D12."
Sam looked at their tickets and saw that they were in row 9. "That's us." She started gathering up her purse and carry-on, throwing Claire's backpack over her shoulder and pointing out where they were supposed to go. Once they got on the plane, they headed to their row. "Do you want the window seat?" Sam offered.
"Yeah!" Claire exclaimed happily. "Daddy said I could see clouds!"
She let Claire get into her seat first before sliding into the seat next to her. Then she went ahead and fastened Claire's seatbelt for her before strapping herself in. "I think you'll really enjoy flying. Not only do you get to see clouds, but you also get to see everything from a bird's perspective. Buildings look smaller and you can see everything that's going on."
"Sounds cool." Claire replied, looking out the window at the tarmac.
Sam looked over at the amazement in Claire's eyes and grinned. They were just sitting on the runway and Claire was already enraptured by looking out the window. She briefly wondered how long that would last.
About halfway through the flight, Claire started getting bored with looking out the window and playing cards with her mother. Sam tried to get her interested in the in-flight movies but wasn't having much luck. Most of the movies were inappropriate for someone Claire's age and the ones that weren't didn't interest her. To make things even more complicated, Sam felt like she was going to be sick again. Although she had taken the pregnancy test and it came back negative, her nausea and dizziness hadn't gone away. If anything, they had gotten worse. And her period still hadn't made its monthly appearance. The urge to get sick got more and more intense as the minutes ticked by and after awhile she couldn't control it anymore.
"Stay right here Claire, ok?" She told her daughter as she unbuckled her seat belt.
"Where are you going?" Claire asked.
"Bathroom." Sam replied. "I'll be right back." She quickly got up and headed to the airplane lavatories. Thankfully, there was an empty one. She slid inside and closed the door behind her before vomiting into the small toilet. Once she was done, she pushed the flush button and washed her hands. Then she splashed some cold water on her face.
She wasn't sure what to think. The pregnancy test she took came back negative. Could it have been wrong? She was still having the same symptoms and her period was still late. Maybe she'd have to find a doctor on Monday and get a real pregnancy test done at a doctor's office. The blood test would be much more accurate. Yes, that's what she would do. She'd find a new doctor in Houston and get a professional pregnancy test. Then she would know once and for all.
Song Lyric: Snow Patrol "Run"