Disclaimer: Not mine. I've begged and they're stubborn.
Title: Red Droplets
Pairing: McKay/Sheppard
Rating: T
Summary: It wasn't the General's face that he'll remember.
Genre: Dark/Angst, AU, fic with permanent injury.
Notes: Companion to Dial Tone.

It wasn't General Landry's face that John will remember for the rest of his days.

He'd been sitting in his room, taking a break from sorting through recruits, when Landry walked in. It had taken a minute for John's thoughts to separate from what he wanted to do to Rodney next time he saw him, but when he did, he wished he hadn't.

The General had said just a few things, including what would happen to Rodney if John didn't stop the foolish relationship he'd had going. It was threatening and angry and John choked back a yell as the man turned to leave.

He thought out every word he was going to say to Rodney, the looks he'd give and how he'd explain it. Just a break he'd say. But first he'd needed to hit something, so off it was to the gym, passing Kavanagh and his fucking smile on the way. He stopped himself from punching the asshole in the mouth.

Once he'd pounded the bag into submission, John knew he couldn't do it to Rodney's face. He'd never go through with it and both their careers were on the line; no, he'd have to call Rodney at Jeannie's house.

He'd taken the long way back to his quarters, walking as slow as he could. Jack O'Neill, wearing a visitor badge and looking shocked, set one hand on his shoulder as he walked past, said something John didn't hear.

The sound of the dial tone met his ear when he first picked up the handset. He listened to it for a minute and with leaden fingers dialed.

After that there was just stolen conversations that always ended in arguments and not the fun ones they'd used to have. They worked together and that was it.

John missed his best friend, even though he was there every day.

Everyone knew something was different between them. People remarked and it was after Radek had to publicly humiliate Kavanagh that everyone knew. It didn't take long before the rumor mill started to talk about them – John left Rodney, Rodney left John, there were other women, there were other men. Not one came close to truth.

Then the planet came where they found Ford. And what John would remember forever was the crimson blood.

When they found Rodney, he was hanging unconscious from a tree. He was bleeding from his ears and mouth, droplets fell to the ground below him as he swayed in the semi-darkness. Beneath him was Ford, dead and cold to the touch, and John remembered that his focus changed then. He could send Ford's body back to his family, it was over. Rodney was alive, but limp as a rag doll.

Carson told him that Rodney had taken multiple blows to the head. Rodney would never hear again.

John took to bringing his ex-lover dinner most nights. He supposed it was his way of assuring himself that Rodney was still alive, but Rodney usually ignored him and didn't move until John went to leave. He never gave any sort of sign that he understood when John told him that he was sorry.

Then the one day came where he walked in, forgetting that Rodney couldn't hear him and for the first time in weeks, Rodney actually looked directly at him. His eyes piercing and accusing, until John slowed down his speech so Rodney could read his lips.

But Rodney looked away after a minute and John was getting fed up. He needed Rodney to forgive him and he ripped a piece of paper from the pad on the nightstand, scribbling down words that sounded useless but he still wrote them.

Rodney got to his feet and walked away, going toward his trunk. John immediately started writing another note. He didn't see Rodney pull his old dog tags, the ones he'd reported as lost to Command, from the bottom of the trunk nor did he see Rodney throw them. He only felt them whap him in the face, the chain stinging as it smacked his neck.

John grabbed them and looked at Rodney, telling him that they'd been a gift, they were Rodney's. But Rodney turned away, and John held the tags closely to him.

Then he rose to his feet without a backwards glance, red droplets falling in his mind.