Hermione had successfully gotten Draco Malfoy addicted to a muggle candy. Not to say that she'd been trying, exactly….More that it had been an amusing game to play, watching the blond-haired boy try to go certain measures of time without a PEZ and then laughing as he begged her for a few more.
"Malfoy," Hermione said, turning to face him.
"Hmmmm?" He asked through a mouthful of yellow candy. (They'd had to move on to her reserve stash of PEZ, from orange to red to green to yellow.)
"Can I ask you a favour?"
He sat up straight, chewed quickly three times, then swallowed. Or maybe it was more of a nervous gulp. "I know you Granger, and I'm not agreeing to anything until I know what it is. Besides, why would I do favours for you?"
"Fine then. I'll rephrase," Hermione replied, looking very confident and very mischievous. "I issue a challenge."
Malfoy groaned. "This is even worse than before…"
Three minutes, forty-two seconds and 53.14 milliseconds later, Draco Malfoy was protesting strongly. "I absolutely refuse to do that! Under no circumstances!"
"I thought you never backed out of a challenge?" Hermione commented wryly to the close-to-hysterical Slytherin.
"We'll just say that this one hasn't been officially issued yet. But honestly, Granger, help POTTER? Are you out of your bloody mind?"
"You don't do it and I don't give you any more PEZ, I make sure everyone knows that you tried to kiss me, but I rejected you."
"I would never try to kiss you!"
"I certainly hope not," Hermione replied, smirking, before ushering him out the door. "See you tomorrow!" She said in sickeningly sweet voice before closing the door.
He stared at the door for a few seconds. "Damn Gryffindors."
The next morning found a very grumpy Malfoy and a very cheery Hermione seated at the Gryffindor table.
"I hate you, you know?"
"You're allowed to use a spell," Hermione replied, looking sideways at him as she bit into her toast.
"But that's not very original, and you'll give me a hard time if I do. Besides," he said after reflecting for a few moments, "There's no spell for getting the strange Irish boy to stop hitting on your best friend, who also happens to be a boy."
"Yes, well, your mission is to do just that. I hope you do it soon," Hermione said sweetly, looking over at Harry, who looked absolutely terrified as he watched Seamus enter the Great Hall.
"I hate you, Granger, more than I ever did before."
"But you love the PEZ, Malfoy."
He muttered a few choice words under his breath before moving over to Hermione's other side, where The Boy Who Lived was being hit upon by Seamus.
"Finnegan," Malfoy growled, catching both Potter's and Seamus' attention. "Stay away from my man."
"You've got to be kidding me Malfoy," Seamus protested cockily. "You and Harry, here?"
"Yes," Malfoy replied steadily, taking one quick look back at Hermione. She nodded encouragingly at him.
"Please," Seamus replied, rolling his eyes. Harry still looked terrified, though he couldn't decide whether to be relieved that Malfoy was helping him or suspicious.
"Fine then, I'll prove it," Malfoy said harshly, thinking of the PEZ, and leaning over and giving Harry a kiss.
Seamus backed away around the time Malfoy pulled away, thougroughly disgusted.
He stalked out of the Great Hall, all eyes on him, dragging Hermione as he went.
"Now tell me," he began ranting, hacking and spitting, "Why you couldn't have done that?"
"It was more fun to watch you do it. And besides," Hermione wrinkled her nose, "Honestly, kissing my best friend would just be too weird!"
"As opposed to kissing your enemy, I suppose," Malfoy commented wryly, taking a few PEZ from her hand.
"It worked, though, didn't it?" She commented brightly.
Malfoy glared at her and tried not to envision his hands around her throat.
"Hermione!" Hannah called to her friend.
Hermione spun around. "Hullo," she said, grinning.
"You really are quite amazing, you know?"
"I know, but…." Hermione looked genuinely puzzled, "What are we talking about?"
Hannah rolled her eyes. "You orchestrated that entire…debacle."
"Debacle, huh?" Hermione looked pleased at the description. "But couldn't Malfoy just be having a mad love affair with Harry?"
Hannah snorted. "Are you kidding? It was just to get that Irish boy off his back, wasn't it?"
Hermione smirked. "Yes, and it worked."
"It always works, Hermione. I can't imagine what must have been going through Malfoy's head though. Were you blackmailing him?"
"Sort of," Hermione replied, grinning and fingering the small foil package in her pocket.
"Hermione," a low voice hissed, dragging her into a classroom. It was Harry.
"Hullo Harry."
"Is he outside?" He hissed once again, gesturing at the door.
"Malfoy isn't in here, so yeah, I'd reckon he's just out there."
"I appreciate your help, really I do, but did it have to be that drastic?" He asked her, sounding a little hysterical himself.
"Look Harry," Hermione replied as she rolled her eyes, "No one really cares about your sexuality. What they do care about is the fact that Draco Malfoy, the so-called Slytherin Sex God, is apparently gay. Really, Malfoy's having a harder time than you are. And Seamus is off your back."
Harry thought about that. "Good point."
"Thank you. Now, if you'll excuse, I have to go make sure Malfoy isn't plotting to kill me."
"Granger, I'll kill you," Malfoy growled when Hermione came out of the class room. Hermione sighed deeply and continued walking. "I'm serious Granger! I just had someone pin a rainbow flag on me!"
Hermione kept walking though her shoulders were shaking with laughter.
Luna Lovegood sat in a small alcove in the hallway and watched her classmates.
It was obvious to her that Hermione Granger was finding herself strangely attracted to Draco Malfoy, and not just in a physical way.
And Draco Malfoy, it seemed, was having the same problem. He couldn't keep his eyes off Hermione, even if he was glaring….it was just a clever cover-up, Luna was convinced.
As for the infamous Harry Potter, it was fairly evident that he wasn't as straight as he wanted himself and everyone else to believe, though he was clearly quite unsure about it. Seamus Finnegan wouldn't have been a good match for him anyways, she thought.
And Hannah Abbot, Hermione's Hufflepuff friend, was having some troubles of her own. That boy she'd bid on, a boy who'd transferred a year before, Will, she thought his name was- He was trouble, but he liked Hannah a lot more than he cared to let on.
And Hannah liked him far more than she wanted to admit, since he was such a player.
Luna sighed deeply and dipped her quill into the small pot of ink resting on her leg. Then she began to write on a long piece of parchment. "The Tangled Web We Weave."
A/N: Right, well, a bit of an odd chapter, but….It had to be written. And I have the next two chapters planned out- This was day 4 of their week-long binding.
To Miss-Cody-James, I finally added Luna! There's a note on my bulletin board saying "ADD LUNA!" but I only just got around to it. Don't know if that's what you were expecting, but I think her insight cleared up a lot….