the second installment of WOWA. enjoy it. or die. or play sonic adventure battle 2. or frolic through your moms flower garden and then get yelled at for killing the marigolds and columbines and daisys. you deserve it you killer!
Wraiths on Wings Airlines!
"I am pleased to inform you that the hedgehog is dead. Hopefully. Ahem. Anyway, we hope you enjoy your flight with us today." said the mysterious voice that was probably a pilot.......OR HEDGEWIFE MYRTLE THE PUNISHER DISGUISED AS-
"I'm right here, you moron!" said hedgewife Myrtle the Punisher, huddled in the corner, staring hungrily at the readers.
HEY!! I'm not a moron...sniff
"Yes you are, now shut up!" screamed hedgewife Myrtle the Punisher.
"So Mr. Frodo." said Sam, rubbing ointment on the 3rd degree burns on his face. "I suppose you're going to the Shire now."
"Yup," said Frodo. "But first we're off to Gondor to get my eyes checked. If there's one speck of dust on my eyes, they'll be ruined."
"YOUR EYES ARE THE BEST!!!!!!!" screamed Frodos numerous fangirls, who were sitting all around him the whole time.
"HAH! Yeah right!" said the mysterious dude in the corner.
The mysterious dude is......FERAHGO THE ASSASIN!!!!! (for those unfortunate few who don't read Redwall, he's a weasel with really pretty blue eyes.)
"My eyes are the best! AND my fangirls are smart!" said Ferahgo, surrounded by fanweasels.
"WE LOVE YOU FERAHGO!!" screamed Ferahgos supposedly smart fangirl weasels.
Ferahgo smirked, "See Frodo? Your eyes are nothing compared to mine. In fact...yours probably aren't even real."
"GASP!!!!!!!!!!!!!" said everyone.
"TAKE. THAT. BACK." screamed Frodo in horror that someone might be on to him.
"NEVER!!!! Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries!!" yelled Ferahgo.
"GASP!!!" said everyone.
"Oh!! It's on!!! BRING IT, WEASEL!!! I CAN TAKE YOU!!!!" yelled Frodo, striking a really dorky karate pose or something.
"Is that a challenge?"
"Yes...Unless you're scared...(cough) COWARD (cough)"
"NO ONE COUGHS ON ME!!!!" screeched Ferahgo, obviously not getting it. "I'll take your challenge!!!!"
Somehow, the plane now has no seats, and its some sort of arena. Gandalf acts as referee, for the thingy.
"Ok then. In my day, there were no need for stuff like this. All we did when people got mad at each other was stab them repeatedly and get on with our lives! Honestly!" said Gandalf, annoying everyone within a five seat radius.
"Shut up, Gandalf!" yelled Bunny Hooded Bombchu.
"FINE!!" yelled Gandalf. "Here's what ya do. One idiot poses. And then the other idiot has to pose better. Simple. Ready???"
"Yup." said the idiots.
"GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Frodo pulls out Sting....
"YAY!!! This will hopefully be somewhat interesting!!" said Bunny Hooded Bombchu, taking lots of pictures.
...And takes off his shirt...
"And now I'm bored." said BHB, pulling a copy of Shakespere's Merchant of Venice, then setting it on fire. Then she starts reading Outcast of Redwall.
...And strikes a pose. (use your imaginations. I'm no good at describing stuff like this...and don't think anything nasty. I'll sense it, and then I won't be able to sleep at night.)
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!! FRODO, YOUR SO HOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" said all of Frodos fangirls. (and Sam.)
"Is that all?!?" yells Ferahgo.
He pulls out his mace and chain, takes off his shirt, and does a better pose. Or something. ARGH!! I can't do scenes like this.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!! FERAHGO, YOU'RE THE BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed all of Ferahgos fan weasel girls, getting nosebleeds.
Frodo does some creepy twisted Matrix pose.
Frodos fans all get nosebleeds. "FRODO!!!! WE LOOOOVE YOOOU!!!!!"
Ferahgo does that, only better.
"WE LOVE YOU FERAHGO!!!! MARRY US!!!!!!!" says Ferahgos fans.
Meanwhile, people on the plane are betting.
"I bet five bucks that Ferahgo wins!" says BHB.
"I'll take that bet!! Mr. Frodo's too hot to lose!!!!" says the guy that has a three letter name that begins with an S and ends with an M.
"Me bet on weasel, precious! Gollum! Gollum!"
"Whats Smeagol doing here!!??!!?? He's evil!!!!"
Then BHB stabs the speaker, Sam of course, with a loaf of bread. "NO HE'S NOT!!! HE'S THE TRUE HERO OF MIDDLE EARTH!!!!!"
"I'm betting on Frodo!!" said Gandalf. "Hes a human!! Ferahgos a weasel!! See the difference?!?"
"ARE YOU BEING RACIST!?!?!?!?!?!?" screams an appalled Smeagol.
"HOLY PIE, HE IS!!!!!!!!!" says Bunny Hooded Bombchu, who attacks Gandalf, armed with a roque mallet.
So...Theres more posing...and more posing...and then even more posing........Until the fangirls realize that they're bored of the guys they cheer for. Then...
Frodo strikes some pose.
"YAAAAAY!!!!! WE LUV YOU!!!!!!!!" screams all of Ferahgos weasel fangirls.
Ferahgo strikes some other pose.
"FERAHGO!!!! YOU'RE SOOO HOT!!!!!!!!" says all of Frodos ex-fangirls. (and Sam.)
"Wait....NOW MY FANGIRLS ARE WEASELS?!?!?!?!?" screams Frodo in horror.
"AWESOME!!! I HAVE HUMAN FANGIRLS!!!! I CAN SELL THEM ON E-BAY!!!" yells Ferahgo joyously.
"So, Mr. Frodo, what will you do now?" asks Sam, cheerily.
"Well.....Now that I don't have my old fangirls, my eyes are useless. SO I'M GONNA GORGE MY EYES OUT!!!!!" Then Frodo used Sting to pry out his eyes.
"............................." says everyone.
"NOOOOOO!!!!! FERAHGO!!!! WE LUV YOU AGAIN!!!!" says the weasel fangirls.
"Cool! Two sets of fangirls!!! Awesome!!!" yells Ferahgo joyously.
And then the Ringwraithe pilot guy pokes his head out the place where pilots...pilot. Yup...still stupid. "HEY!! KEEP IT DOWN!! I CAN'T CONCENTRATE ON THE HUGE FLOATING ROCK THAT WE'RE ABOUT TO RUN INTO!!!"
"Whoops. I suppose this is my fault, since I wrote this." says BHB, casually.
AND THE PLANE EXPLODES IN A BLAST OF FIERY FIRE!!!!!!!!!
yup. now review, or I'll sick Myrtle on you.