And now, the dramatic conclusion to our tale...
The Major began her count, "Three, two, one, MARK!" and flipped on the light switch. As the lights came on, everyone began singing at a deafening volume. No one got past the second 'Feliz Navidad' however once the large bundle of sheets on the bed began moving. Time seemed to come to a stand still as the sheets were thrown back revealing. . . Really, it was just too much to have to. . .
It was a night cap.
It was fuzzy.
It had some sort of cheerful face on it, like a cartoon character. Worst of all, it was on Batou's head. In the total silence that met this discovery, none of the guys at first realized that the enraged cyborg wearing the nightcap was lunging for them. Borma was able to sidestep at the last moment, causing Batou to crash into the wall.
Batou stood without saying a word and turned around, brushing off plaster dust. He crouched, ready to spring again, but hesitated. Togusa took advantage of the moment to try and defuse the situation. "Ummm, Merry Christmas," he started, wincing at the lameness of his own words.
Batou relaxed slightly, then bellowed, "Damn it! What theHELL is going on? How the hell did you get in here, Togusa! I know the Major has something to do with this!" He stalked back to his bed, bumping into Paz on the way. "Who else exactly is here anyway?" he demanded.
The men looked at each other, then back at Batou, confused. It didn't last long though when they beheld the nightcap again. Sniggers erupted, causing Batou to growl and mutter under his breath as he searched for something.
The Major, forgotten until now by the rest, chuckled. Six heads snapped around to the doorway where she stood, idly juggling two small, metallic objects. "Looking for these?" she asked helpfully, holding up his eyes. "I told you I would get you back!" she taunted him.
Batou yelled, "YOU!" and seemed ready to rush her, but then sat down on the bed. "That was two damn years ago! I thought for sure you had forgotten!" he muttered, shocked.
"Really Batou. You should know that a woman never forgets," the Major said, walking over to stand in front of him. "I've just been biding my time, waiting for the right moment."
Batou lunged to his feet, towering over her. "I can't believe you would hold a grudge that long! And that was nothing compared to this! Was it necessary to bring the whole damn section!"
Unintimidated, the Major responded, "I consider this a little training exercise. I didn't even need optical camo to get by you and snag these while you were defending your honor a moment ago!" "Get ready for a delivery, guys," she communicated privately to the rest of the group.
"How about a trade then? Here," she guided Batou's hand to her outstretched palm. As soon as Batou's fingers closed around the eyes, she reached up and snatched the nightcap off of his head, flinging it over her shoulder. Saito dove in front of Togusa and snatched it from the air, then ran out, whooping. Paz was hot on his heels, and the rest of the guys couldn't help but join in the fun. From the relative safety of the living area, they took turns loudly speculating about the reasons behind Batou's choice of nightwear.
Batou strode out of the bedroom, now fully dressed and followed by the Major. The guys began tossing the nightcap in the air, daring him to get it back. Batou refused to rise to the bait. "Let's go," he said shortly. "I need a drink."
"Finally!" Paz and Saito cheered, but the Major stepped in front of them.
"Just where is it you think we are going?" she asked, smiling serenely. "This is the 'someplace special' I was talking about, you know. Besides, the last time I took you somewhere we couldn't get a decent day's work out of either of you two for a week! Batou gets to pick our watering hole tonight. I think he deserves it, don't you?" then she went on ahead out the door.
Batou put his arms around Paz and Saito's slumped shoulders and grinned wickedly. "So, she tricked you did she? Well, I know just what we can do about that!" he was saying as they left. Borma, Ishikawa and Togusa brought up the rear, eager to hear Batou's plan.
As he shut the door behind him, Ishikawa looked at the security keypad, then turned and called out, "Hey Batou! You ever think about getting a dog?"
Now you know the awful truth. But wait! Have our little blue friends been left out? Up next, a little Christmas bonus for you...
-Neg