Hey, when I move my keyboard over my desk it sounds like a donkey!

Hello. Oktoberfest is actually over, but since I switched the International Dateline in my fic, this chapter isn't considered late. Today, the fabulous I will answer to your reviews:

Atem's Queen- Good to see you back again. Yes I update! Hurrah! THE GLITCH ONLY WORKS ON RUBY! (Actually, I would be twice as surprised as you if it did work on Ruby).

The JapaneseWeirdo- Takes a bow

The Mad Writer- AndI guess you don't own (i know you don't). Me and my crazed assumptions...

Shinja-Chan- Takes Another bow

The Mad Writer- Mercilessly runs after dubbers with an axe DIE! Er um, where was I? Oh yeah, Takes another bow Mmmmm, badgers...

Sniffles. Almost 30 reviews. Thanx so much guys, you really make my day.

NOTE: This chapter contains Major 4Kids bashing at the end. And I love every bit of that :)

Oh, and GO TRISTAN! I forgot for the past chapters for some reason...

Chapter 11: Exciting Duel of Oktoberfest!

"I'll start this duel!" Rebecca said as they both drew 5 cards. Tea was using a duel disk because she couldn't just leave her cards of the ground, they'd get all messy and the rain clouds would attack them and such. But she was still going to use the powers of alchemy to summon them!

"Wait, don't we have to do that whole rock, paper, scissors thing to see who goes first?" asked Tea. "Or flip a coin? Or something?"

"That's for losers!" Rebecca yelled. "They never did it in the anime. They shuffled their cards like once or twice through the entire series. Although it does explain how those great combos just sort of show up… Anyway, I'll start by placing 4 cards face down and summoning Ugly Fish!" So she set four cards and summoned her monster Ugly Fish (300 ATTACK and 789 DEFENSE) on the field. It was very ugly. Several thousand spectators fainted, including the AC of Doom, which really isn't possible…

"My turn!" Tea said.

"But I haven't ended my turn!" Rebecca yelled back.

"Then end it!"

"I end my turn. Now you can start yours," Rebecca said.

"This is going to take forever," YG said, pulling out the ultimate card that would assure Rebecca total victory. "Take this."

"Is it legal to do this?" asked Rebecca.

"Don't ask me," said YG. "I've never been shown actually dueling professionally. But may the force be with you!"

"Wrong show." It was Kaiba, who had around per say 46 pretzels in each arm. "I decided to sell all of my stocks for these pretzels!"

"Can't you see they're in the middle of a duel?" Tristan hissed.

"No, not really."

"Anyway, it's my turn," Tea said, drawing a card. "I activate this Spell Card: Destruction of 4Kids Dubbers! This increases my life points by 8000! And I activate Harpy's Feather Duster to get rid of all of your magic/ trap cards!" With a flick of her hand, the first magic card was destroyed; it was called "What a pointless place to put this card!" The next the three were called "Bluff." "Well that was cheap!" Tea pointed out the obvious. "Now I summon the Inflatable Beach Ball!" A beach ball came, inflated. "It has 567 attack points and 0 defense points. Now destroy Ugly Fish!" Tea kicked it at Ugly Fish, and the Beach Ball promptly died. It just died. Somehow…

"AHA!" Rebecca said. "Ugly Fish has a secret ability that you could have seen if you wanted to, but you didn't because you were dumb enough to attack, just like in the series! Ugly Fish destroy all monsters that attack him because he's so ugly!"

"That's really cheap," Yugi said.

"Pegasus must be getting short of ideas," Tristan said.

"I still can't breathe!" Duke yelled from the AC of Doom, which had fainted.

"End turn," Tea said bitterly.

"Now I will draw this card!" Rebecca drew her card. "I summon Heart of Spades!" A pathetic playing card appeared with -45,678,953,389 attack and -45,789,894,332,634 defense. "Now this card may look pointless," Rebecca said. "And it is! Ugly Fish- Attack!" Ugly Fish looked at Tea funny and Tea lost herself 300 life points.

"Tea, you might as well give up," Rebecca sneered. "I play 'Ultimate Anti-Magic' which is an extremely cheap card that prevents you from destroying this card! I end my turn."

"Well, Heart of the Cards, you better get off of your couch and help me for once," Tea said.

"You do know that in the dub I'm perfect for denying the Heart of the Cards' existence because it DOESN'T EXIST IN JAPAN?" asked Kaiba.

"Hey why'd it go all caps?" asked Ryo.

"Because nothing makes sense anymore," Leaf stated the obvious. But since when has anything make sense?

"Well, then I guess the fact Yugi never shuffles his deck is the sole reason he wins," Tea said. She drew. "I summon Uglier Fish! (3000/0) I'm cheap that way, because some guy gave me this 4 star card for the unbelievably low price of peanuts!"

"But Uglier Fish will die to Ugly Fish's effect," retorted Rebecca.

"But Uglier Fish is even uglier so the effect is completely negated," said Tea, using her powers of alchemy to cause the Uglier Fish to destroy Ugly Fish.

"GASP!" gasped Rebecca. "If I don't win the next round, I'll lose!"

"Looks like it'll rain today, but if it doesn't, I guess it won't," said some crazy Batman wannabe as he swooped over Rebecca with a sign that said 'Sentence that restates itself in a redundant and utterly stupid way that shows the authoress likes mangos.'

"Mmm, mangos," Seto thought aloud as he put his pretzel in the best condiment ever- green ketchup.

"Well, the only hope is to use the card YG gave me which I happen to know is on the top of my deck because I put it there!" Rebecca said. She drew. "Oh my gosh! I got YG's superbly awesome card! What a surprise!" She did this whole awesome pose thing, with two underpaid Germans behind her doing the moving action blurb and everything. Rebecca held up her card for very short seconds and played it. "I play the magic card 'Break All the Rules Card!" Rebecca said. "This card allows me to disregard every rule in Yu-Gi-Oh and do whatever I want! I choose to pick up a trap card from my deck." Rebecca chose her card and set it. "Now I take away Heart of Spades from the field and set my trap. Then I summon this Spell Card in Attack Position!" Rebecca summoned Multiply in attack position. "Okay, I end my turn."

"That was a stupid move," Tea said. "Uglier Fish, destroy Multiply with your Ugliness attack!"

"I counter with my 'You Automatically Lose' Trap card!" Rebecca yelled as the attack came nearer. "This allows me to negate your attack and make you automatically lose!"

Tea's life points hit zero.

"NOOOO, HOW COULD I POSSIBLY LOSE!" Tea screamed.

"Maybe it's because you've only dueled like once," suggested Yugi.

"Or because Rebecca is a cheap cheater?" suggested YG.

"Or maybe because you stink at dueling?" suggested Seto.

"WHO ASKED YOU?" snarled Tea.

"Well, I won so I get to steal your soul," Rebecca said.

"Psst, that's our old job," said Varon, Amelda and Raphael.

"Oh. Well, I get to stuff you in the AC right?"

The AC came to life, and with YG's help, Tea was shoved into the AC dangerously close to Duke, who still couldn't breathe.

"Tea, we're just encouraging the shippers," Duke said as Tea bunched up to him uncomfortably close.

"And who said I'm not a shipper?" Tea said sweetly.

"ARGHHHHHHHHH!" Duke screamed, taking up three lines of precious space. Oh well.

"Oh yeah, that reminds me," Yugi said, trying to turn towards Tristan. But his chains got stuck on his shoe, and for several minutes Yugi hopped, saying his threat to Tristan between hops.

"Just- you- wait-Tristan- I'll – get- you- for- becoming –evil –and- sticking –my –friend –with –a –shipper!" Yugi managed to gasp as he jumped there like the world's greatest human pogo stick.

"How bout after Oktoberfest, since we have the rest of the day due to the switching of the International dateline?" asked Tristan.

"Okay," Yugi said, jumping his way over to a beer tent (no one's as innocent as you think they are).

"I'm going to go get high off of those cheesy pretzels," YG decided, hopping his way over there.

Tristan meanwhile harassed the same German beer tent guy on slipping him a mug while no one was looking.

Seto Kaiba sold all of his money to buy some more pretzels.

Duke screamed. And Tea was causing him to.

Rebecca was eating the "Break the Rules" card to assure it never got into the wrong hands.

And they all lived happily ever after.

Okay, not really, but can't we imagine it?

MEANWHILE, AT THE 4KIDS HEADQUARTERS

"You know," Al Kahn said to his partner in ebil, Roger Slifer who is the only reason the Thunder Dragon Osiris was renamed in the dub, "I think we should use more crazy accents that have no correlation in the series! Like, let's give Naruto an Italian accent!"

"OHMYGOSH! That's a great idea!" Roger Slifer said.

Al Kahn went to the freezing chamber, where anime characters were tortured so that they'd have no character when it came to screen time.

"Here, Naruto," Al Kahn lured, with a scrap of cake.

"So hungry… Food!" Naruto lunged at it and ate it hungrily. Roger Slifer pulled him up by the scruff.

"You will listen to me," Al Kahn said, flipping out his Anime destruction LASER, Annoying Italian accent version 9.0 Optimized. "I am your father. You are under my hypnotic spell! Now listen to me!" Naruto's eyes went into a blue spiral. Al Kahn blasted his head with his LASER and put Naruto down.

"Momma Mia! I'm Naruto!" the ninja said as Mario music began to play in the background.

Sakura went up to him. "Momma Mia! What happened to your voice Naruto?" she asked in the same Mario-esque voice. They all did the Mario. Doo du du du do do du do do doh! Doo du du du do do du do do doh! Nah nah nah nah nah nu nu nu nu!

"Wow, that was pointless!" Kisara said from within the chamber and promptly died like she's supposed to (although 4Kids might make her go to the dreaded nonexistent SHADOW REALM! WoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo!)

Note: I don't own Naruto. I don't even like Naruto. But my brother and I got into this discussion about 4Kids and we ended up talking about Naruto with an Italian accent. He's weird that way.

A normal update (rather than a sudden Oktoberfest-y one) will come up on Friday- Saturday. I'm still in a warped reading fever and I'm reading a nice and seriously intellectual one about 1.618... better known as phi. It's called the Golden Ratio. GO READ IT.

And remember folks; "The reasonable man tries to adapt to the world, while the unreasonable one persists on adapting the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man."

LET'SHEAR IT FOR THEUNREASONABLE PEOPLE!