Note from your lovely Authoresses: Just so you all know, chapter 39 will be the last chapter of this story before it continues in the sequel, "The Outcasts." With any luck chapter 39 will be posted at the same time as "The Outcasts" so even though the end is near, a new beginning is, too!

Warning! I would rate this chapter M for mature, so… read if you really want to. Nothing really happens plot wise anyway.

Chapter Thirty-Five: Desire

(Pohli's POV)

Slowly, Akito and I managed to hobble our way back to his room. The dark and cloudy sky had begun to send sparks and shoots of lightning across the sky. I smiled, remembering the first night Akito and I had spoken to each other.

Such harsh words my Aki had told me, such fierce words…

Now all the words that come out of his mouth towards me are smooth and gentle. I often wonder if I'm talking to the same person I had first met.

"What are you smiling at?" Akito asked with a raspy voice.

"Do you remember when we met?" I asked, feeling warm inside.

"What? Oh, yes." His lip curled in that wicked smile, "I remember." He reached out and brushed my hand with his.

Blushing, I bit my lip. "It was so cold that night."

"You were so beautiful that night." He said soothingly as his fingers intertwined with mine.

"It was during a wonderful storm, like this." I looked to the sky one last time before stepping inside Akito's main quarters. Almost on queue, Aki began to cough wildly again as we kicked our shoes off by the door. With him leaning heavily on me, we managed to reach his wide futon on the floor.

He sat down and continued to cough as I kneeled there in panic mode.

"Sit." He barked out, still coughing. Quickly, I sat down in place beside him and almost instantly he fell from a sitting position down into my lap. I wrapped my arms around his convulsing shoulders gently and began stroking his hair and back.

After a while, Akito's coughing fit had ceased and he lay peacefully in my lap with his eyes closed. The dark clouds hovering in the skies outside made it seem later in the evening than it is. Returning my attention back to Akito, I wished that we could always be like this. No matter how corny sounding that wish was, I didn't care. Seeing Akito like this was enough to keep me happy.

Without realizing it, I had soon lied down as well and drifted into a light sleep.

I have no idea how much time passed before I snapped back to reality when I heard Akito's coughing. I sat up rubbing my eyes noticing that he was hunched over coughing up dark blood all over the floor.

"Oh my God, I'll go get Hatori!" I jumped up to go find the doctor elsewhere on the Sohma estate.

"DON'T YOU GO ANYWHERE!" Akito screamed through his coughing. Clenching onto my wrist, I instantly recoiled under his grasp.

"You're hurting me!" I cried out in pain, tears starting to form at the corners of my eyes as he was pulling me back down to him.

As if finally noticing who I was, his face smoothed back to a calm demeanor. Where his fingers had been digging into my wrist, lines of blood began to form.

"Pohli, look what you made me do!" Akito swore, accusing me as if it were really my fault.

I jerked my hand back, finally realizing something that I had been wanting to deny all along… he could hurt me if he wanted… just like anyone else.

"You… I was just trying to help…" I struggled to get the words to come out.

I was so stupid! How could I believe he wouldn't hurt me when he had hurt everyone else around me?

"Pohli… I, I just…" Aki slowly took my bloody wrist and gently pulled me closer. He quietly examined the wound, holding my wrist tight to prevent me from running away.

I was scared but I knew I couldn't just run away from him. You can't run away from the faults that you adopt as your own when you love someone. Without asking, he began to gently run his fingertips through the blood, searching for the slices. He seemed to find an erotic pleasure in playing with my blood; it was starting to freak me out. As his fingers worked their way through the blood I kept pulling my arm closer to myself instinctively. The closer I pulled my arm towards myself, the more he would lean into me.

The boy was enthralled by the blood. His lips quivered as if he craved to taste it.

When his eyes finally looked up from the blood his expression had changed completely. Confused, I opened my mouth to say something, anything, to tell him he was scaring me. Before I could say anything, a bloody finger was resting on my trembling bottom lip.

"Don't…" He whispered softly, caressing my lips.

"Akito, I…" My words were drowned out by his lips pressing into mine. His tongue parted my lips and began licking the blood off of them. Pulling away, he kept his eyes on mine as he ran his tongue over my bloody arm, which sent shivers down my spine.

Akito pulled my arm up to the side of his face so that my fingers could run through his dark hair. His mouth met mine again only the kiss was stronger and filled with desire. I felt him shift his weight so that he was completely over top of me.

That's the point when his strong hands started to wander a bit. At first it was down my sides, feeling the curves and bare skin that showed. Then it started to get a little more personal when his fingers met the end of my skirt and began sliding the material upwards.

I tried to protest. I seriously did, but his mouth wouldn't allow me to as he began to pull the top button of my blouse loose. Freeing his other hand from grasping my wrist, he began to cradle my head as he continued to pull away at my top.

I was still screaming on the inside for him to stop, but I felt my fingers crawl under his kimono to his chest. I couldn't help myself. Every part of my mind was screaming for me to leave… But every fiber of my heart and body told me to stay.

With little effort his kimono slid off his shoulders and only the strip of cloth wrapped around his waist held the rest of the kimono in place.

"How can you love such an evil thing? Something that does not know how to show love…" He whispered seductively into my ear, "It will all be destruction in the end."

My hands gently caressed his face as he finished unbuttoning my shirt. Without hesitation his hands went back on the move again.

The skirt was next. Frail and flimsy, it was easily removed. Of course I felt naked in just a bra and panties, but it didn't seem to matter now.

Akito paused in his aggression to sit up looking down on me.

I asked with a shaky voice, "What's wrong?" Akito's face was now cold and hard as he stared at my bare skin. "What's wrong?" I repeated sitting up trying to cover myself.

The boy frowned and stood up, looking away from me. Nervously I started moving towards him but Aki's eyes narrowed.

"Stay away!" he snapped. Startled, I backed away. I could feel his eyes mentally undressing me. Hesitantly I looked down and noticed just how cold the room was. My bra showed silky and smooth before him. Instantly my hands struggled to cover myself again, although he had already seen the damage.

After waiting for what seemed like hours for him to say anything else, I glanced up and saw that he was now standing right before me. "Akito, I..." My words faded as I saw the perplexed look on his face.

His dark eyes avoided mine as he placed his hands on my bare shoulders. "I'm afraid of hurting you… because I know I always will be causing you pain." Then the strength in his hands began to slip away as if he was losing his will to do anything.

"I know you don't mean to…" I said sadly, wrapping my arms around him and clinging to his warmth. He continued to look away as if ashamed of his own feelings.

I felt his hands gently rub my back before unsnapping my tiny strapless bra. I saw his mouth open as if to say something but no words came out. Instead he closed his eyes and brought his fingers up to my neck. The back of his pointer finger slowly began to descend downward. As he brushed my bare skin I felt goose bumps crawl over my flesh. I pulled away slightly and my bra fell to the floor. I allowed my bare chest to be revealed to him if he wanted.

Instead, his eyes remained closed as his fingers slipped over my breast and onto the softer center skin. My breaths quickened as his hand began to feel more and more of me. Delicately, he would touch me as though I would break.

Eventually his lips parted and his eyes opened ever so slightly. His mouth twitched as he longed for my skin. Gently I ran my hands up his arm and over his neck and back. My mind mentally screamed as I pulled his longing mouth to my bare skin. Instantly the boy's longing turned into utter hunger as he violently kissed all over my chest.

I cried out in pleasure as his tongue slipped onto my skin and began to circle around the softer areas. About in inch above where my school uniforms low cut sweater would sit, Akito began to suck and bring the blood to the surface. I didn't care though. I'd show the world how much I, the unloved freak, loved being touched.

For a moment Akito pulled away and gazed up at me smiling the wicked smile as if waiting for permission to continue. I couldn't help but smile back as he pressed his hands and mouth on my other breast.

When he had had his fill, his mouth met mine again. He wrapped his arms around me as he pulled me tenderly down onto his bed. It wasn't long before his hands were climbing up the insides of my thighs. His fingers slid up and under the thin mesh material.

"Akito!" I whispered as I felt his fingers enter areas no one had ever seen or touched before. "Akito… I really..." I continued as his fingers appeared and caressed the skin around my panty line. Slowly I felt them slipping off of me as well. "Really…" I mumbled and started removing the rest of his kimono. The boy pulled the remainder of my clothes all the faster once the right encouragement was given.

After that the time flew by. Akito was excited, intoxicated by the movement, but he waited patiently as he slowly crushed my virginity. I felt tears of pain swell up in my eyes as he finished my first time. I was not the brave girl I had always been in that moment. I knew he wanted more but instead he just held me and wiped my tears away.

At last we relaxed and held each other. It was dark outside now; the sun had set about an hour before. I sighed and closed my eyes drifting off to sleep. As scared and embarrassed as I was, I realized Akito must have had it ten times worse. He had never seen a woman like that before, obviously by his reaction.

Glancing up at my sleeping Aki, I smiled and stroked his pale face. The boy was truly beautiful inside and out, of course he had flaws like everyone but I couldn't help but love them all...

Merry Christmas everyone!