" Your what!"
Ayumi screamed in outrage, sitting rudely on someone's desk swinging her legs finishing her handful of Oreos. She carefully placed another gently enough making sure her gum and food wouldn't touch each other.
" I can't believe you Kagome!"
Ayumi spat a wade of Oreos out of her mouth, watching it hit someone on the cheek. She tried to sincerely apologize to the girl who had a scowl, as she wiped of the crumbs that were on her cheek. " That your backing out of another party AGAIN!"
While everyone else was busy doing their assignments, and taking care of customers at the office Ayumi and I always took the time to sit on random desks or lean against the wall, and chat. Ayumi knew about the graduation party, everyone did. It was going to be big hit; everyone had been talking about since the day of our graduation.
Carefully I laid back in the chair looking at the stacks of papers, trying to pretend I was looking like I was doing something constructive when the manager walked by. When the coast was clear, I gathered my breath and continued the conversation.
" That was close."
Ayumi mentioned holding her hand over her heart. " I thought he was going to grab me by the side again." Ayumi fixed her hair that was wrapped neatly in a bun.
" I had talk with him, that you were dropping off papers. It took a lot of convincing. Back to the party scenerio."
Ayumi agreed looking back and forth at the walls and the beautifully hung paintings inspired by Japan, then back to being excited about the party.
" You have to go. I mean there's no ifs, ands, or buts! It's the party of the year. I know you hate it but everyone we know is bound to be there. There's going to be drinks, food everything. And you, " She paused having a cunning smile on her face. " Can look forward to seeing Hojo."
I twirled around simply amused in the chair and stopped when she made that comment. The room just went suddenly quiet, and my face was already flushing from the facial expression on Ayumi's face.
" Come on, it wouldn't hurt Kagome. I mean after all it's better than sitting at home missing the life we had, and our friends. Including Sango. There's no need for moping around. I know you very well, more then you know yourself. You'll thank me later believe me." Ayumi mentioned placing her fingers at the corners at my mouth forcing a smile, and jabbing me in the ribs until a spat of laughter showed. " I've always told you, one day could chance your life." Ayumi tried to keep a positive up beat but I just shook my head and watched more employees trot past the door, and back to the piles of papers.
" Your right about that." I referred to Sango when spoke that sentence. It had so much significance. One day could change your life could mean anything. Most good and a lot bad. I wanted so badly just to decline from the party and finish my shift, and go home. Lay there staring at the painting on my ceiling I got lost in. Lost in black and white photos of the past, letting the world continue to past me by. Hear Ayumi call me back partly sober and tell me how the party was. Something inside was insisting me to go to this party. It was too strong to ignore it. I was always the one to avoid things; paranoid of something so simple afraid it would ruin me.
"Maybe your right. It wouldn't hurt to live once in awhile."
I couldn't help but smile. Ayumi's depressed face changed when she heard the words she never thought would come from my mouth. She flew off of the table in excitement, throwing me into a tight headlock seeing my smile- for once I wasn't faking it either.
" There you go! I knew it. I knew I'd finally get through to you someday. I thought it was impossible but it isn't. I just proved the impossible is possible! I'm so glad your in Kagome. We all thought we lost you completely."
Ayumi threw her arm around me rejoice. I knew if the rest of the girls were around they'd create attention with their victory dances and loud laughing voices. Even though it was just Ayumi, I could already hear the others. She made up for all others not being there. Quickly, I covered her mouth knowing Ayumi didn't have control over her tone of voice. She couldn't even whisper without two other people hearing.
" Shhh.. are you trying to get both of us fired?"
My eyes narrowing seeing the boss was standing idly by the door slowly peaking in, seeing Ayumi had enough time to hide in the corner, while I just smiled at the boss and looked like I was a hard worker all along. The boss just nodded kindly, fixed his long bloody tie and headed off inspecting the rest of the work place. Ayumi dramatically placed her hand over her forehead, and stunned by all the time we had wasted.
" We have five minutes until we leave this bloody place! That means I'm going home gathering some sleep, and getting ready to party!"
Ayumi twirled the pencil between her fingers, so exciting about events like that. Usually she was only excited because this was the last time everyone from school would be together, and from that point on we'd all go our separate ways like we never knew each other ever existed.We'd only find someone of us down the road- some working at a food joint for the rest of their lives, or some who were already married and with a family. I enjoyed the teenage life. It was annoying that you weren't exactly a kid or an adult either, but you got away with a lot of things. I just wasn't ready to accept it was over. I wasn't ready to be engaged, be in a serious commitments, or even go to College or University. I didn't like the change. I didn't know where or who I was going to be, and that thought scared me.
" Well somehow you talked me into it. I don't know how but you did." I told her with my laugh full of laughter knowing I was a very hard person to deal with, when it came to problems like this. She just sighed in relief digging her knuckles playfully into my head.
" Well you are a very hard person to persuade. I must say that. I know you'll have fun. I mean half of the people there are friends, basically family to all of us. Everyone is going there separate ways, which I hate to admit it but the teenage years are done. Now we get to look forward to being adults."
Ayumi spoke with barely any pep or cheeriness when she spoke the last sentence. When we were younger all of us idolized to be grown up, to be married, have kids living the childish dream. Being adult came with tons of responsibilities, and not all of it was fun and games like we believed it would be.
We both stared at the clock with excitement seeing our shift was finally done and over with. Ayumi grabbed the extra papers on the desk, and swing her hips down the hall the minute the cute new worker had finally noticed her existence. She giggled, with the flirty like hand over her mouth, and her cheeks raised until her eyes disappeared. The young guy shifted his hand over his hair in nervousness, seeing he wasn't use to this kind of attention from girls.
Ayumi quietly nudged me in the elbow, her eyes widened with surprise and eager excitement. " Did you see him? Did you-" I just shook my head knowing this was the girl I knew and loved. " "Yes I-" " He was so cute! Not only that but I've only talked to him at least two times. Not enough to know him just yet. I think he's name is Jake..John.. who cares he's a very nice guy though."
I couldn't even get a word in without her constant blabbing about how cute this guy was, or how she wanted to be his faithful girlfriend and go to the movies, and share each other drinks and stories. She was a smart, funny girl but all her seriousness she had washed away the minute a guy with an attractive appearance was in the area. She then transformed into a ditzy over obsessed girl who believes she's in love. It happened all the time. Even when we stopped in at a store.
" How long can she possibly take to get skittles?" Eri was already furious that we were already at least five minutes late from missing one of the best box office movies ever made. Eri loaded up the car, idling angrily her foot on the gas ready to just leave the parking lot and let Ayumi walk back herself.
" Look if your so pissed off then quit your whining and go drag her out yourself!" Yuka explained dropping her candies from her hands, her eyes narrowed at her ready to bash each other in at any given moment.
" Maybe I will! Were going right now. She's flirting with another damn clerk again and I'm not missing out on another thing again!" Eri pressed on the gas petal hard already in the motion of reversing when she was stopped.
" Look if you'd like I'll go her. I mean it's stupid to sit here and argue. I'll be right back with her."
Sango was the only normal, tamed one out of the group. She carefully slid from her seat of the old truck, wearing nothing but a plain gym shirt and her normal partly ripped stylish jeans. She was always the ones breaking everyone up from being at each other's throats, always trying to keep all of us in order in place. It seemed without her at that time we'd never be able to get along with anyone at all.
She strolled along where I had been trying to drag Ayumi out the front door. Of course when she talked to guys it was like she was so focused on him, never anything else. She had half of her body over the counter, her elbow swiftly to the side and had a whole bunch of food she placed there, only to talk to the guy a lot longer.
" Really? That's interesting." She smiled with delight, batting her eyelashes in such a way the guy looked like he wasn't even interested in doing his job anymore. He kept a wide smile on, and slowly scanned the items and continued chatting.
" Well I've only had this job a few months. My parents forced me to after I had gotten in trouble with a group of friends."
She twirled her hair and giggled. " Really…Tell me more."
Before the young eighteen year old clerk could go on with his story, Sango flew open the doors and whispered something in Ayumi's ear that changed her mind completely to even talk to the guy. Ayumi waved goodbye, and Sango made everything look so easy, so simple. She always did. She was a gifted girl, and still is.
In my thoughts, we were already out the door into the chill of winter. Ayumi threw on her leather gloves and shivered knowing she pitifully had to take the bus, since she lived so far away. When the bus stopped, she flashed a smile and a huge hug as though we'd never seen each other again.
" Kagome, I'm glad you've decided to go to the party. C'ya there!" She smiled, turning around giving her bus past and seeking the empty seat beside the eighteen year old. I knew she was going to take that opportunity to sit down, and use her famous lines to start talking. In five minutes she would know his name, number, and his whole life story. It was likely she'd have a fling with him, and before then she'd be back to her same routine.
The bus hauled down the street for a group of what appeared like the regular shoppers at the mall, and before long it disappeared into the night of winter. Carefully I sat pitifully against the bench behind me, and watched the snowflakes slowly fall. I just laid back and saw how our lives all changed. Ayumi and I were best pals because of Sango's introductions, even Yuka and Eri. Ever since Sango's death most of us spilt apart into other groups of friends. For awhile Eri was hanging out with different crowds until she realized, she liked us more then any others.
Just when the warmth of my body was gone, and counted all the red cars in the parking lot there he was coming up the rear.
" Higurashi, I'm sorry I left you waiting. I had to get a few things for the party."
Hojo smiled sincerely, and leaned over and popped open the door and shifted all the bags of food and essentials into the back allowing me to my room to sit. He changed the radio to my favourite station without me even asking this time, doing everything to make me feel comfortable and content.
" That's quite alright. I was standing around with Ayumi for abit. She decided to take the bus, and I wasn't waiting that long."
Hojo placed his foot hard on the brake, watching the light just snag him into staying for a red light. He sighed, knowing this happened always when I was in the passenger seat. I wanted to laugh at his expensive but I resisted from the facial expression on his face. He slung his leather jacket neatly over the seat, and had enough time to rest his opposite arm in behind my head.
" I'm glad. Ayumi could of hitched a ride of us. I have no problem with her at all." He made small talk as we were getting closer to our streets, and the familiar surroundings. He tried to multi-task by keeping his eyes on the road, and his eyes on me. He could never drive without being distracted in someway or another.
In the dark, feeling things become more awkward as the ride progressed. Usually him and I had so much to say to each other but since the party was brought up, there was nothing left. Hojo was already planning to move far as possible, where his new job would be. He'd be in a warm climate all year, a place beautiful and tropical. He'd be sending letters, finding them more exciting then a phone call.
" Hey look Higurashi. Do you want go straight home? I mean you can come to my place before the party. It would be a lot of fun, and besides it's been along time.. Get some movies, watch TV like old times. That's if you want, totally up to you."
Even in the dark my features, and my smile were noticeable. I wasn't going to decline or run away from my fears I was going to accept them.
" Sure. I mean it's not like I'm going to dress up fancy or anything for this party. We might as well waste some time until then."
He was ready to turn down my street until he heard my answer. He changed the signal from left to right, and headed further up the main street. While we went further into the dark side streets we past the old apartment building once again. I knew I didn't want to go with Hojo but I couldn't back down. All I did in my life was run away from everything. That's all I knew how to do after my father's and Sango's death. I didn't want to be that girl anymore.
We past by my father's old apartment, the only living memory of him. Gazing at the weak looking apartment I could hear my mother's voice clearly telling me about the history of it, and her and my father. Everytime I saw it I couldn't help but stare at it. It was just one of those things, only a person who close to being in my shoes could understand. Within my gaze I saw the same group of guys again.
The guys stood close to the edge of the sidewalk, their shadows casted by the single burning streetlight. The black hair guy stood plainly with only an old ratty looking jacket, with a few buttons and things clipping it together. It looked like he was barely kept together at all. His face was partly sunken in, and partly fit. He stood there with a sideways smile when he saw my face, and it made my stomach twist in turn. He just flashed a jerkish like smile at me, and backed away from sidewalk.
" You alright Kagome?
I just laughed it off. I didn't understand why he was always around when I was. I thought maybe he was just a drunk pervert, or something along those lines. The look he gave off was hard enough to explain. He looked like he had something to say, and I didn't even want to hear it. I knew without the car-or Hojo- I might be considered vulerable. I only wondered if I were to walk past him would he leave me, or approach me. I didn't know, and I tried not even to think about it.
After we passed I still felt tense. Hojo slowly pulled in the driveway, and nicely opened up the door. The way that guylooked, he could of been one of those guys who took Sango away. I just swallowed, trying to keep my paranoid thoughts at bay. The last thing I wanted to think of was something like that.