Tapan: Merry Christmas everyone! I'm sorry it took me so long to update this.

Torna/eating a candy cane/ she had no inspiration.

Jhkitty/a hat glued to his head/ bah, she coesn't need it. She can suck on her own!

Tapan: ;-; you know, Jho. You have no Christmas spirit. /cries into Torna's shoulder/

Jhkitty: stop calling me Jho!

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim. However, last night I had a dream Jhonen gave me the rights. I was happy, but then I woke up and it was like "Dammit!"

Warning: slash, drunkness, RAPR, ZADR and RADR. Flame if you wishers!

Red walked through the door and heaved a sigh, turning off the disguise. His antennae perked when he hear the sound of giggling from the other room. Cocking an eye, he walked further into the house. "Pur?"

Suddenly, Purple jumped out from the side right in front of Red with a loud. "BOO!"

Startled, the crimson leader jumped back with a yelp, just barely grabbing hold of the door. One hand pressed to his chest. "Jeez, Pur! Are you trying to kill me?"

Face a little flushed, the violet irken continued to laugh before shaking a bottle in Red's face. "lookit what I found! It be a liquid that no burn! It's also yummy."

Red blinked and took the bottle away from his companion, reading the label. "…Budweiser…"

Purple smiled cutely and grabbed Red by the arm, pulling him over to the couch and sitting him down. "Have some, Red! It seems these monkeys made something tasty!"

"Hmm." Red looked into the bottle before taking a sip, long tongue licking at his lips as he thought about it, after a moment, he shrugged as he tried to ignore the weird little buzz the drink seemed to give him. "It's not bad."

"See? I told you! Didn I tell you! I told you good, huh?" Purple grabbed himself another bottle as Red took a large gulp from his own.

About an hour and two beers later, the two tallest were sitting on the couch, swaying back and forth and smiling like idiot.

With an extremely slurred voice, Red spoke, pointing at his co-leader. "You know, Pur. I don't give you 'nuff credict…yours a gewd guy and leader and stuuuff."

Dropping his bottle, Purple shook his head lazily. "noo I'm not! I do no good for Irk! You'd do much better wiffout me!"

The crimson irken frowned. "No I couldn'tn't! I woun't live wiffout you!" Red but and arm around Purple and rubbed his cheek against the other's "I luv you too much!"

Purple blinked and looked over at the other. "Wow, Red. Do ya mean dat?"

Red didn't answer. Instead he pressed his lips to the other tallest, a light hum in the back of his throat.

Purple sighed and shut his eyes, hands finding their way to Red's head, playing with the other's antennae idly.

The crimson leader let out a small moan and leaned into the touch, kissing feverishly.

After a while, the kiss broke. Both tallests looking into each other's wide eyes. Red blinked and clenched his jaw as they stared.

After a moment, Purple smiled widely and kissed his fellow leader on the chin. "You're cute!" he then leaned in and snuggled close to Red, antennae twitching every now and then.

Red just spaced out, trying to ignore Purple as the violet tallest sighed, his head falling to the red one's lap. His breath hitched a bit as one of Purple's hand found its way into his robes.

"Hey Red!"

"Ow…Do you need to talk so loud?" the red head covered her ears then began to rub her sore head.

Dib blinked, confused. "Is something wrong?"

"No, Dib, everything's fine. I just have a throbbing headache."

"Ah." Digging through his pocket, the boy pulled out a small bottle of aspirin and handed it to Red.

Red took it and blinked, cocking an eyebrow as she looked at the label. "You carry aspirin around with you?"

Dib shrugged. "Well, you never know when you need it."

Red smiled. "And with a head your size, the headaches must be constant."

The paranormalist glared and grabbed the bottle, pocketing it again. "Fine I guess you don't need them then."

"No! I was just kidding, Dib. Jeez, take a joke why doncha?"

Dib sighed and handed the bottle back to Red just as the bell rang. The girl flinched and glared up at the bell with a growl.

She looked up just in time to see Phoebe run past her, heading to class. The both paused, looking at each other with wide eyes. At the same time, a twin blush formed on their cheeks and the purple haired girl turned away, sprinting down the hall to her class.

Dib noticed the little exchange and blinked. "Did something happen between you two?"

Red turned away and opened the little bottle, forcing two pills down her throat before closing it and handing it back. "I'd rather not say now."

Dib blinked but left it alone as they headed to class.

Around lunch time, Red was feeling much better. Her head had stopped throbbing so much. She walked into the cafeteria and walked over to her usual table, finding phoebe already there, head down.

Head cocked to the side, she walked over and put a gentle hand on her friend's shoulder, shaking lightly. "Hey, Pur. Wake up."

"Ugh…no…" she nuzzled against her arm then sighed. "I've got a sick feeling in my Squeedly spooch. It's annoying."

Red frowned but then decided to leave her partner alone. Instead she sat down next to her and glanced around the room.

"Red!" the redhead looked behind her to see Jessica storming up, he minions following at her heels.

Red looked at them through bored eyes. "Okay look. I think it's obvious that we don't like each other, so why don't you just take the not-so-subtle hint and leave us alone."

"No! I'm sick of you two acting all superior to us. Like you're better than us, no! it doesn't work that way; we're better than you."

The red girl cocked an eyebrow. "You better than us?" she chuckled and stood up. "My dear moron, you have no idea who you're messing with!"

"Oh yeah?" the blond crossed her arms with a scowl. "And who exactly am I messing with?"

Red opened her mouth to speak, only to be interrupted when Phoebe launched up, the sick feeling momentarily forgotten. "We're nobody! Just you're average human girls! Yup, uh huh!"

Red glared at Phoebe, then to Jessica.

Jessica blinked, and then snarled at the violet girl. "It's not nice to interrupt you're little girlfriend. Let the bitch speak."

Red stifled at the comment and balled her hands into fists.

Phoebe glared warningly at her companion. "No."

Jessica just laughed. "How cute, A lovers spat!"

The expression in Phoebe's eyes changed. Before Red could register the change in her mind, the violet one snapped around and back handed Jessica.

All of the girls looked at Phoebe, shocked. As Jessica turned to look at Phoebe, she earned herself another slap.

Red blinked, jaw dropped. "Pur?"

Phoebe glanced back at Red, but otherwise ignored her as she glared at Jessica.

The blond held her cheek as her eyes narrowed. "How DARE you!" she then back handed the violet girl, hitting her right in the temple.

Or, more to the point, the device on the temple.

Phoebe held her head in pain, the headache starting to come back. She didn't notice the device had malfunctioned from the impact, her disguise starting to fade until everyone could see through it like a veil.

Luckily, Red was the first to notice it. Her eyes widened at the sight and she grabbed the other by the arm. Glaring at the small group in front of her, she plowed through and started to run down the hall, much to the confusion of everyone around them.

Pushing into the bathroom, she looked under the stalls before locking the door.

Phoebe/ Purple blinked, oblivious to the disguise's malfunction. "Red? What are you doing?"

"Pur, look in the mirror. You tell me what's wrong."

Blinking, the lavender one looked in the mirror, eyes widening at what he saw. "How-"

"Obviously, it wasn't put together right."

Purple pulled the little wire off and examined it in his hand. After a moment, he blinked over at his fellow leader. "I don't know what's wrong."

"Of course you don't" Red took the little machine away from Purple and poked at it before frowning. "I can't fix it here. I'm going to need some other machines."

"Well, Red, we don't have any here, now do we?"

Red bit her lip as she tried to think of a proper solution. She winced as an idea popped into her head. "But I know someone who would." She walked over to purple and pushed him in a stall. "Stay there until I get back."

"I don't wanna stay in here, it smells!"

"you don't have a choice, Pur!" with that she closed the stall and walked to the door. "I'll be back in a minute."

The crimson girl stopped once she got into the cafeteria, looking around frantically. She nearly sighed in relief when she spotted the person she was looking for, picking at his food in digust.

Without any further hesitation, she sprinted over, pushing past people and skidded to a stop behind him. "Hi, Zim!"

The poorly disguised irken turned around, looking up at Red with wide, confused eyes.

The look of confusion changed to surprise when the redhead grabbed a hold of the back of his shirt. After a moment, the event processed in his head and he began to struggle just as the exited the cafeteria. "Hey! Wait!"

Red kept a tight grip on the invader as she continued forward, not a word to the one she was dragging.

With an expressionless demeanor, Red pushed Zim into the bathroom and followed behind.

The smaller one stumbled in then shot up, glaring at the redhead. "You have no idea who you're toying with, stink beast! I demand you tell me--" he stopped talking when Red walked past him and over to a stall, pushing it open.

Red looked over at Zim with a sigh. "Well, Zim. I think this may clear a few things." Reaching into the stall, Red pulled out the purple leader, causing the tallest to fall over.

Purple looked up at Red and pushed himself off the floor with a glare. "Was that really necessary?"

Zim was dumbfounded. "muh…..muh, My Tallest!" now any intelligent being would be able to put two and two together.

Unfortunately Zim is not one of those beings. He glared over at Red and quickly positioned himself in between the crimson girl and Purple. "You DARE kidnap an irken!"

Red looked down at him incredulously. After a moment, she glared. "You idiot! It's me!"

"'Me' who?"

Red growled and turned of his disguise with a roar. "HOW STUPID CAN A PERSON BE!"

Zim's eyes opened impossibly wide at the sight of the crimson tallest.

Purple looked down at the invader then over at Red. "Well, isn't this a brilliant idea."

"Shut up, Pur."

About an hour later, Red was working on the little machine. Zim sat by, handing him supplies as he needed them. Behind the two, Purple was pacing back and forth impatiently.

"are you two done yet?"

"Pur, I swear if you ask that question one more time, I'm going to tear off your head and dropkick it!"

Zim's approach was less violent. He looked back at his leader. "We're working as fast as we can. Please be patient, my Tallest."

Red snorted and continued with the device. "suckup."

Zim ignored Red and turned back, watching the crimson leader work.

After a few minutes, the little contraption beeped. Red smiled triumphantly and handed it Purple. "All fixed!"

Purple took the device and put it back on his head. "It's about time!" turning it on, the little machine created the disguise once again. Phoebe winced as the bell rang and started to head out of the bathroom.

Chuckling a little, Red turned on his own disguise and followed before turning back to Zim. "remember, Zim. No one is supposed to know we're here, and that includes you. So treat us like humans, alright?"

The smaller irken shot to his feet and saluted his leaders. "Yes, My Tallest."

Red and Phoebe walked out and started down the hall. After a moment, the violet girl turned to Red. "How long do you think he'll keep away?"

The red head paused. "I give it six hours."

Tapan: yay! It's good to get back into mah fanfics. /sighs/ well, that's all for now! Have a merry holiday and stuff/tosses candycanes and presents to all reviewers/