1Dear Diary

By: Yamiko #7

I'm trying something different this time. (Waves) Ohaiyo gozaimas! I figure it beats "Hello again, all" at the beginning of every chapter. If I've just started getting tired of that, then you're all probably ready to kill me if I say it again. Hence the change. n.n

I'm already on Chapter Three of a fluff fic that hasn't really gotten fluffy yet. I think I might be doing something wrong here. 5.5 Heh heh heh, whoops.

And I'm pretty sure you're all tired of insanely long Authoress Blurbs at the beginnings and ends of my fics, so unless I have something especially pertinent to say, I'll try to keep it short from now on.

Thanks, and here's Chapter Three!

Chapter Three: Chrno

Tug. "Ow."

Tug. "Ow!"

Tug. "Ow!"

Yank.

"GOD DAMN IT!"

Joshua is sitting across from me, holding a pair of tweezers in one hand and the biggest splinter I have ever seen in the other. He gives me his best scandalized look. "Chrno! We're in a monastery here!"

"Oh really." I lean back in my chair and cross my arms, wincing at the pain in my hands. I was right, I ignored my injuries and now there's hell to pay. I hate being wrong, and now I hate being right too. I can't win.

So, being the brilliant person I am, I take it out on Joshua.

"We're in a monastery? I couldn't tell. I thought all the people wearing habits were in costume. Acting, maybe."

Sarcasm is a wonderful thing.

Joshua looks even more scandalized. He's not angry. Not crying, either. The kid has a thicker skin than I thought he would.

"Here, Joshua," comes a voice from behind him. "Why don't you let me finish that."

I sigh. Evidently I haven't been tortured enough today.

The source of the voice is Father Remington.

Peachy. Just peachy.

He picks up the tweezers and, shooing Joshua away to go help one of the sisters with some chore or another, takes Joshua's seat. His look turns to me and he grins. "So, how's life?"

I don't reply. Part of it is me just being nasty - Remington and I have never really gotten along, for obvious reasons - and part of me doesn't want to answer that question, no matter the identity of the one who asks.

He gives me his 'clever' look. "Doubt thou the stars are fire, doubt that the sun doth move, doubt truth to be a liar, but never doubt I love."

I return his gaze. "Is that advice or a confession?"

He just laughs, my sarcasm simply rolling off of him. I sigh. The guy is sixty-some-odd years old, of course he's gonna have a thick skin by now.

"That was a quote from the greatest man who ever lived." He looks at me. "Didn't you recognize it?"

I sigh. Again. He has this effect on me sometimes. "There's something wrong with you when your answer to everything is a quote from Shakespeare."

"It's not my answer to everything. Just my answer to this." He shrugs. "If Shakespeare really were my answer to everything, I'd have killed you the first time I saw you." He grabs one of my hands and yanks a splinter before I have time to do anything about it, least of all protest.

So I react.

"YEEEEOWCH!"

He's still smiling. If anything, that damned grin's gotten bigger.

Somebody get me out of here. Please.

"Chrno, I need to talk to you, alone." Sister Anna, who is suddenly standing behind me, looks at Remington. "If you don't mind, Father."

Somebody actually heard me.

That's just creepy.

But who am I to complain? It's what I wanted, right?

Of course, I also wanted to tell Rosette that...well...and look how that turned out.

She never answered. She just looked...scared.

Fear is the ultimate rejection.

Great. From one bad mood to another. Let's see if I can hit three.

"Of course not." Remington smiles, stands, hands me the tweezers - "See if you can get something done." - and leaves. Anna takes his place.

It's like a roulette. I wonder who the next person will be.

As if she has yet again heard my thoughts, Anna leans in. "It's Rosette," she says quietly. "She just came back and she's acting...funny."

Oh, great. On my list of things I want to hear, that would come in absolute last.

First would be...no. Not happening.

Stop torturing yourself, Chrno. You know it's not gonna get any better.

"I was thinking maybe you know what's going on..." Anna continues.

That, Sister, would be the understatement of the year.

"...And maybe you could help," she finishes.

Right. Asking this of a guy who can't seem to help himself, let alone anybody else.

But I'm not about to tell her that. People tend to mock you if they find out your love life is less than stellar.

That, of course, would be assuming I actually have a love life.

I'd laugh at that if I didn't feel like such a fool.

"I'll see what I can do." I get up and leave the tweezers on my seat. Anna's thanks follow me as I head off to find Rosette, thinking about my actions and regretting them every step of the way.

I've come to the conclusion that I need to stop categorizing this fic as "fluff." It probably won't get fluffy until the end (read: another two chapters). Until then it's going to be more sarcasm and light angst and all that jazz. I'm going for a five-part wonder here. The only other five-parter of mine that's actually worked was "Lucky Pendant." (Raises an imaginary glass) For the sane part of me, here's to hoping this fic lives up to that precedent. For the crazy part, here's to hoping it surpasses! (Drinks)

I've gotten nine reviews on the first two chapters of this fic already, and it's only two days after I posted it. Wow, I feel loved. (Big happy smile) I'm simply amazed that I haven't been flamed yet. Normally my stuff goes unnoticed for weeks and I have to browbeat people into reading it. Thanks so much for your attention. If you've left a signed review, I've hopefully already replied to it. (If I haven't replied yet, feel free to yell at me. I should treat my readers better. n.n) If it's unsigned, I'm answering it here. If you don't particularly care about this, then go ahead to Chapter Four (if it's up) or just skip it: I don't mind either way.

Rosette/Chrono Fanatic: First of all, the name says it all. (Laugh) Thanks for the review.

JasmineScent85: Thank you for the compliments. (Blushes) I'm a very easily flattered person, and you're rubbing all the right places. (Purrs) I appreciate the suggestion for the title (you're the only one so far!); however, "Confessions" to me implies that somewhere along the line somebody's done something wrong. I guess I'm begging and choosing: I need to stop doing both and maybe just stick with my title. (Laugh) Thanks for the suggestion and the review!

piss(star): I nearly had a heart attack when I read your review of Chapter Two. My manga spoiler was...incomplete...so I had no idea how long the time lapse was. I was thinking two, maybe three months? Seven years is, well, a REALLY long time for anybody to be gone. So, in my ignorance, I set this story after those two or three months. Hopefully that answers your question. By the way, you have one of the most...interesting...pen names I've ever seen. Where'd it come from?

Thanks again to everybody and see you all in Chapter Four!