Dear Diary

By: Yamiko #7

Welcome to the final chapter of this wonderful piece of pseudo-fluffy, angsty, and generally bizarre...um, stuff! How's that for an intro?

I just looked back at my Authoress Blurb for Chapter One. I had to laugh. I went and warned everybody about the fluffiness of this fic in BIG CAPITAL LETTERS and the fluff doesn't show up until just now. (Laugh) Hindsight being 20/20 and all that jazz.

Before we get started, I want to thank everybody who stuck with this pathetic experiment in failed fluffiness and actually enjoyed reading it. I have discovered that the more I hate something I've written, the more the readers love it (and vice-versa). Crazy, ne? Thanks so much for reading this and leaving all your wonderful reviews: I appreciate it more than I can say. So let me try with this: (biiiiiiiiiiig hug!) Does that work? n.n

A final note on this final chapter: I alternate view points (denoted by page breaks) starting with Chrno. There was just too much in this last one to keep it limited to one point of view.

Without further ado, I present: Chapter Five! Enjoy!

Chapter Five: Closure

Now what am I supposed to do?

I'm standing in front of Rosette, holding the top of a broom handle and for some odd reason, I can't seem to do anything but vaguely wonder how on God's green Earth she managed to break this one. From the look in her eyes, I've managed to put her into shock again.

Beautiful. Just beautiful.

...She really is. Beautiful, I mean.

Life would probably be one hell of a lot easier if I could manage to think straight.

Now what am I supposed to do?

I'm standing here, looking up at Chrno, doing my damnedest to get my brain started again and failing miserably.

Funny. I don't normally fall to pieces when Chrno comes around. Then again, people don't normally tell me they love me, either. Especially not Chrno.

And I can't avoid thinking about it, either. After all, he is standing right in front of me. I can't exactly ignore him.

Well, I could, but I don't think it would help.

Take the handle back, Rosette. That's a start.

"Um, thanks," I say, my voice sounding shaky even to me. I reach slowly for his hand and close my fingers around the end of the broken piece of handle.

My knuckles brush against his palm.

Suddenly there are shivers running races up and down my spine. It doesn't feel bad, though. I kind of like it.

It takes a moment for that to sink in. I just touched him and it does that?

I look at Chrno again. From the look in his face, he felt it too.

So I'm not the only one who's lost their mind.

Small comfort, that.

I gasp, trying hard to get both my heart rate and my breathing back under my control.

God in Heaven, what was that? One touch from her, one accidental brush of skin, and suddenly I just go crazy? For those few moments, I could feel nothing but the touch of that one little bit of her flesh against mine.

What's more...that felt good.

Really, really good.

I shake my head roughly. What am I thinking! I can't do that! She's already...she...I...

She turned you down. Cry me a river, build me a bridge, and get the hell over it already.

...but I can't.

I don't know why, I just can't. Something's holding me back.

All I can think of is those few moments, that touch. Every sense in my body is still aflame from that brief flash of pleasure.

Oh God.

If that's all I can think about, then maybe I...I really shouldn't...

I squeeze my eyes shut. Damn it. Damn it!

...So that's my problem. Too much emotion and nowhere near enough control.

I turn my face away from her, trying to hide the tears welling in my eyes.

If you look closely you can see me fall apart.

Ready?

I blink and look closer at Chrno. He's breathing hard and his shoulders are shaking.

Jeez...is he crying?

Not on my watch he's not.

"Chrno?" I touch his wrist. No shivers this time.

He jerks away as if he's been struck. "Don't," he says in a strangled whisper. "Please...please. Don't." He still won't look at me.

He really is crying.

Cut it out. Quit turning away. I wanna talk to you, darn it.

"Chrno," I say again, grabbing his wrist this time.

He shakes me off and turns to face me. There are tears streaming down his face.

"Rosette," he tries. "You...I...I just..." He shakes his head and starts to turn away again.

I am really getting tired of that.

"Chrno!" I grab his wrist again.

Suddenly his hands are gripping my shoulders and his face is inches from mine.

"Rosette, I...you..." He shakes his head and looks straight into my eyes. His voice is quiet, intense...scared. "Do you have any idea how hard it it to be with you when I know I can't have you?"

Seconds pass as we stand there, frozen in time.

Then, right in front of my eyes, he crumbles.

He drops his hands from my shoulders, brings one of them up to cover his still-crying eyes, and starts to turn away from me. Again.

And now I am pissed. Royally freaking pissed.

I grab his arm and spin him around, then I put my hands on his chest and push him against the wall. I grab the collar of his shirt and yank his face down to my eye level. "Who says?"

He blinks, shock having momentarily stopped his tears. "Wha..."

"Who says!" I grab the hair behind his ears, pull him closer. "Who said you couldn't have me?"

"Rosette..."

I let go of his head and wrap my arms around his chest instead, pulling us closer together. I feel his body stiffen in my embrace, ready to break away.

"They're wrong," I say.

"Wha...what are you -"

"Whoever said you couldn't have me was wrong." I loosen one of my hands and use it to tilt his chin down so he's looking at me.

"They're wrong." I look straight into his eyes.

"I love you, Chrno."

And as I say it I know it's true.

So I say it again. And again. And again, until I know he gets my point.

...I don't believe it.

Does she...does she really...

I slide my arms gently around her. When she doesn't protest, I tighten my grip and pull her body against mine.

She hugs me back.

And ever so slowly, I relax into her embrace.

I lean my head down until it rests on her shoulder, next to hers. I'm crying again. This time, though, it doesn't hurt.

"Rosette."

"Mmm..."

I shake my head slightly, the beginnings of a smile playing across my lips. My answer is to place a light kiss at the spot where the line of her jaw meets her neck. The familiar little shiver of pleasure thrills through my body at the touch.

Her back arches slightly under my hands, and I know she's felt it too.

"Chrno." She leans back slightly, looks at me.

"Yes?"

She smiles. "What are you doing it over there for?"

I blink. Does she...does she really want me to...

Almost as if responding to my thoughts, her smile gets bigger. She taps her lips with a finger. "Right here.

"And it had better be good."

So I do.

And it is.

Better than I thought anything could ever be.

"..."

"..."

"I love you..."

And with that, the fic is officially over. I sincerely hope you're all smiling at that ending - I know I was. I've always wanted to write one of these, and now it's done - that's a great big helping of WAFFiness right there. n.n (Sigh) So happy...I just love it.

Oh-kay, Chapter Four anonymous reviews time! (BTW, since there won't be another chapter after this one, I figure I'll answer the anonymous reviews for this chapter in my authoress bio or something, so look for your review responses there.)

piss(star): And you just keep coming back. Man, I love you for that. A very Merry Christmas to you too.

JasmineScent85: Well, I'm glad somebody likes the whole broom thing. Here's the update that everybody seems to be begging for. You have a Merry Christmas too.

Rosette/Chrono Fanatic: Yes! Yay for the updates! Here's another one! (Ummm…obviously…heh heh.) I didn't really consider that a cliffy, but whatever…n.n Merry Christmas!

I know, it's over…there goes my primary source of reviews…(sniffle sob) But! I'm posting another fic starting…now! It takes place after this one and it's called "The Source of Power." I hope y'all will like that one too, should you choose to read it. It's not quite as "romantic" as this one, but it definitely has the sarcasm. (And we all know that's what counts.) n.n

Thank you ever so much for reading this, and Merry Christmas!