Boy oh boy, I made another fan fiction without even telling you guys. How surprised you must be…..oh well.
Hopefully this will hold you off until I get a creative spark and finish the chapter.
"…."-things aid from backstage
"…."-things said from announcer dude
Now to start
The Captain Falcon Show: starring Captaaaaaaaaaiiiinnnn FALCOOOONNNNN!
Captain Falcon sat behind a table with a couch next to it. In the background, the window shows a picture of New York City, but it really isn't New York, it's just a picture of it because Captain Falcon is doing all this in his basement. Well….actually Falcon doesn't own a basement so I really don't know where he's filming this. But anywho, he's got a whole room full of an audience(the audience from Paper Mario 2 is all that would come…..they have lives to waste…) and has some cameras. He's also got what every Talk show host needs……A band! Yay for the band whose careers must suck having a gig in a talk show in a basement. Now here's the one and only…..CAPTAIN FALCON! cue the generically made clapping and occasional woots
"Hey everyone! It's me Captain Falcon!" Captain Falcon said walking out to his table/desk/thingy.
cue more generically made clapping and occasional woots
"It's good to see you too. Anyways, where am I?"
"The talk show…." Came a voice from backstage.
"Right-o! Hey guys guess what? I got accused of Molestation Charges yesterday!
random, uncertain laughing
"Yea I know! Who would think that-?"
"You did….he has evidence…"
Falcon looked confused. Then said, "Well folks, it turned out I did! Yay!"
With that comment people left the audience.
"Don't worry guys, the people who left are pansies. You don't want to be pansies do you?" asked C.F.
After the audience shook they're heads bars came down over the door leading out locking everyone inside.
"Yay! The new bars have been assembled and are in working order! Isn't that great?" without letting the audience answer, C.F. moved onto the next subject, "Alright so on the show today we have the first 4 people forced off the hit show Survivor: Smash Bros., Mr. G&W, Nana, Dr. Mario, and Marth. See what they have to say about the matter. Then we'll give some news on what's going on in the world and then later on we'll be taking questions from the audience and the viewing fans at home! Hurrah! That is, if you have questions…..But first! A moment with Master Hand and Chutton the overly obese pet chicken! Guys?"
On a T.V. monitor it showed a giant chicken sitting on top of a white glove in a very small room. The hand managed to gasp out, "My…God….he's….s..sooo…..f…fat…" And he then went out cold. Then the chicken gobbled and did 15 much needed jumping jacks. On Master Hand.
"Now wasn't that informative?" Captain Falcon was saying, "Well now let's welcome the four outcasts! Mr. G&W, Nana, Dr. Mario, Marth, Come on down!"
The four came out of the backstage and comfortably sat on the couch. Then Marth took a sip of water on the coffee table. Suddenly Dr. Mario screamed out, "NOOO! Marth put it down! You might contract AIDS!"
Marth spit the water out and whipped at someone in the crowd. "MY EYES! IT BURNS!" He tried to run out but the bars prevented him causing him to run into them and fall over. He huddled into a ball and started having convulsions. Someone screamed to Falcon, "You have to do something! Open the door! He's going to die!"
Falcon responded as follows, "Nah, he'll be okay. As long as the power of Nasferatu is with him, he'll be just fine."
Dr. Mario leaped up and jumped over to the man. He checked his pulse and discovered he was dead.
Marth glared at Captain Falcon, "How could you let him die! And how were Aids in the water! How did he die? What's going on?"
Captain Falcon laughed at this, "First of all everyone, it was rat poison, not aids," everyone sighed in relief, "and second of all, I have no idea how that got in there."
Captain Falcon smiled innocently.
Everyone believed him and became happy. Yay!
"So guys, do you think it's fair that you got kicked out of Survivor without even getting a chance to compete?"
Nana spoke first, "No, it wasn't fair what Teal did. All I did was ask a simple question-"
"SILENCE CLONE!" Captain Falcon pulls a lever and Nana fell through a hole in the ground.
Dr. Mario looked confused and asked, "Now why did you do that?"
Captain Falcon pulls another lever and Dr. Mario too, fell through a hole in the floor.
"So Marth, here's a question that everyone's been asking, why wear a tiara?"
"Well, to be honest I think it's cool."
"Well you obviously thought wrong now haven't you?"
"No?"
"Indubiously."
"Huh?"
"Yup."
"What?"
And the flock of high pitched screaming fan girls broke down the wall and stampeded over Marth leaving nothing but dust in their wake. Asking me how they broke down a wall underground is beyond me. So don't ask.
The Darth Vader music starts playing from no where and Darth Vader himself walks in, slashes Mr. G&W in half and walks away.
"And that's the end of that, coming up after the break, current news!"
COMMERCIAL!
And now it's over……
And Now back to The Captain Falcon Show! Starring……CAPTAAAAIIIIIINNNNN FALCOOOONNNNNN!
"Yay I'm famous! Let's talk about the news." Captain Falcon walks over to a TV screen, "As you can see, King Bowser has successfully taken over the Mushroom Kingdom. In a related story, Gannondorf has taken over Hyrule as well. The two new kings have gotten in an argument over "your mom" jokes and have declared war against each other. Yesterday the first battle was fought as many koopas and octoroks were slaughtered. Both sides pulled back from the warfare and are now peacefully awaiting their rival's next move. In Pop Star, many waddles are getting fed up with King Dedede's tyranny and are starting riots and protests. I had a chance to talk one on one with the King myself…..
"So King De..dede..de…..de?
"King Dedede," The king corrected.
"Right, Dededede,"
"No, just three De's"
"Before or after?"
"Before or after what?"
"The mulberry bush, of course."
Dedede put his hand up to his face and muttered, "Moron….."
"Anywho! What changes have you made to Pop Star recently?" he asked.
"Well, for example I've made every Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday worship King Dedede day, Wednesdays and Saturday s are give food to the needy King Dedede day, and Fridays are days we take out 15minutes of our time to thank me for everything I've done. And Sunday s I give them the day off of work as long as they pay me 20 dollars. The twenty dollars are being used to erect a statue in my name." King Dedede looked proud of himself.
"Is the community happy with these changes?"
"Pft, who cares?"
"Well I sure don't, I don't even know why I'm here!"
"There you have it everyone, King Dedede himself. Now onto some questions from the audience." Falcon walks up to an audience member, "Do you have any questions?"
"Uhm….yea, can we leave now?" he shifted his eyes nervously.
"Nope!" Falcon smiled and moved onto the next person, "how about you?"
a man in a black suit and black sunglasses answered, "Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to get down on the ground. Of what I've seen and heard today, you are a serious criminal that needs to be taken down. You have molested someone, committed homicide, and don't have a permit to film a show down here."
"What is the correct answer for this?"
"Sir, get down to the ground now."
"42?"
"Sir, what are you talking about?"
"What does this do?" Falcon pulls out the agents' gun, "hmm….."
"Sir, put that down now!"
"WEEE!"
BANG!
We are having technical difficulties broadcasting this show, please tune in later. For the remainder of the show we will display colorful bars. Enjoy.
Captain Falcon ended up shooting the agent and fleeing to a new basement in which he could broadcast which will be aired next week. Luckily, the agent was a mass murderer that was impersonating an FBI agent and Falcon won 1million dollars. Then he got stripped of the money due to molestation charges, homicide, a hostage situation, and much much more.
So if you want to ask him(C.F.) a question just email me.
1.Go to my Profile
2.click e-mail. (hint: it's in blue!)
3.type message.
or you could choose not to and make me come up with some questions...
I'm planning on trying to get all the Smashers in here sooner or later...
feel free to give me some suggestions on something to add in here. Seems a bit...small.
Fun fact: this is the first chapter I've completed in 1 day. Yay!
R&R- Your mom.
oh, what you gonna do now? what you gonna do?