I'm on a roll just because I'm having a great time writing this! I'm sure you're wondering why Lionel and his friends were let in, well they have special connections with the owner. Nuff said.

ChApTeR ThReE

"What are we going to do now huh, Clark?" Lex looked up at Clark.

"Well, that door back there could lead to Lana. We just have to get there quickly."

"Quickly! I can barely walk in these shoes!" Lex motioned towards his feet.

"Well, let's just go." And the two of them tried their best to not fall. They approached the group of laughing men and almost made it past until . . .

"Hey ladies hold up!" Lionel's distinct voice called out to Lex and Clark. The two boys skidded to a stop and cringed looking at each other. They slowly turned and faced Lionel. "Well, well. Haven't seen your faces around before. You new?" Lionel approached them.

Clark cleared his throat and put on his best fake woman voice, which wasn't very good.

"Uh, yes. Totally new."

"Well then, hello." Lionel eyed Lex, fake breasts and all. "I'm surprised I haven't seen you. Such a beautiful young lady couldn't have missed my eyes. What's your name?" He smiled. It took Lex a minute to realize that his father was talking to him.

"Um, my name?" He to put on his best woman's voice. "It's um . ." he looked nervously up at Clark and then back at his father who at the moment had no idea the woman he was hitting on was his son. "My name is . . . Lexiss!" he blurted out.

"Ah, 'Protector of Mankind'. Very nice. Can I buy you a drink?" Lionel invited and Lex's eyes widened.

"Excuse us." Clark pulled Lex off to the side. "This could help us. You could keep him busy in case he's involved in this."

"You do realize that my father is hitting on me, his only SON!" Lex leaned in and whispered. Clark ignored him and pushed him back to Lionel and walked off trying to make his way to the door.

"So what about that drink?" Lionel swirled the ice in his empty glass seducingly. Lex looked like he was about to cry.

"Sounds like fun!" Lex tried to act cheery all the while cursing Clark under his breath as Lionel lead Lex to the bar.

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Meanwhile, Clark was managing to push past everyone getting closer to the door every step. He was only stopped for a moment when a waiter stopped him to ask if he wanted anything. Finally reaching the door, he made sure no body was looking and twisted the knob.

He slipped in and was face to face with a maze of hallways.

"Aw, shit." He cursed and shuffled forward, his sparkly blue dress constricting his movement.

Clark reached a fork in the giant maze and bit his lip, finally choosing right. At the end of the hallway was a door. He turned the knob but it was locked. Using his super strength, he broke the knob and pushed the door in only to be met with more hallway.

"I hope Lex is doing okay." He sighed as he continued to trudge on.

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Lionel handed Lex, or Lexiss, a glass of scotch, brushing his hand gently.

"I've never met a woman who drank scotch before."

"Well, I like to be daring!" Lex tried to joke. Lionel motioned for him to sit.

"So, where are you from?"

"Um, Illinois!" was the first thing that popped into Lex's head.

"That's a long way."

"Visiting friends." Lex sighed, tired of using this fake woman's voice already and disturbed at knowing that his father was flirting with him. After a short pause, uncomfortable for Lex, but not so much for Lionel, Lionel spoke.

"I have a private lounge room behind the bar, if you want to join me for a more silent conversation." Lionel leaned in a little and smiled.

"Oh, I don't know . . . I mean. . . well . . . I should wait for my friend. ." Lex was panicking as he desperately searched for an excuse, any excuse, to get out of it.

Suddenly, Lex felt a finger placed gently on his lips. Lex's eyes widened when he realized it was his father's.

"Shhh. . . " He leaned in closer. "Relax." Lionel removed his finger and leaned in. It was all Lex could do not to scream bloody murder and run out the door. Just as their lips were about to touch, Lex stood up and brushed his dress.

"So what about this room?" he nervously laughed.

This is my favorite chapter so far! Don't worry folks. There's no incest between Lionel and Lex. Not much anyway. . . just a kiss that will scar Lex for life. I'm not spoiling anything, you all knew it was coming!