Yawn. . . so sleepy. . . but must. . . write. . . Hey! Where are all the people who asked for a sequel? I'm doing one. . . kind of. . .

ChApTeR SeVeN

Clark had finally gotten up late in the morning and stumbled downstairs to the impatient faces of his parents. Jonathan stood from where he was sitting but Martha stayed put.

"Son, I want you to explain exactly what you were doing in a dress last night, why you came home so late and what Lex was doing with you!" he ordered and Clark didn't have much of choice. He sat down and explained the whole thing.

When Clark finished, Martha pulled the tape recorder out from under the table and turned it off.

"You. . . you were recording the story!" Clark panicked.

"Yep. We need narration to go with the pictures we're getting developed in another hour or so." Jonathan stretched and acted like everything was perfectly normal.

"I have to say, it was very noble of you two to go to such great lengths to help Lana. Did you find out who this blonde woman is?" Martha asked as she inspected the tape.

"No. I was thinking of going back to the club with Chloe and asking if we could see the security tapes or something. I don't think they'll recognize me." Clark grabbed his coat and went to find Chloe, who he knew was at the Luthor mansion.

"Be careful Clark!" Martha called after her son as he sped away using his super speed. She then turned to her husband and smiled. "Shall we go get some pictures developed? They should make wonderful Christmas cards."

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Because he had no other clothes, Lex was forced to pull on the same dress he was wearing the night before. Lex was now impatiently waiting for Chloe to arrive with hope that maybe she could get him out of this mess.

The front door burst open and shoes clicked down the hallway and were making their way into the living area. It was Chloe and she too seemed impatient as she waited for Lionel. Lex tried to sneak away or hide so Chloe wouldn't see him but it was too late.

"Hi, do you know where . . . Lex?" Chloe put a hand over her mouth to stifle the laughter when Lex turned around to face her. She had totally forgotten about the night before. Lex's bare feet slapped on the cold floor as he ran up to her and shushed her.

"My Father doesn't know it's me. He still thinks I'm a girl."

"What are you talking about?" asked Chloe and Lex remembered that she wasn't there when everything happened. So while they waited for Lionel to show, he explained everything.

"Oh. . . wow. Some adventure. So he has no idea you're you?"

"Nope."

"Kinda funny. I mean you have a figure that could pass as girly but your still not very convincing are you?" Chloe pulled at a strand of his wig and it bounced back into a curl. Lex sighed and was about to scratch at his head again when Lionel walked in.

"Ah, Miss Sullivan. I see you've met my. . . well, we seem to be at a crossroads as to what we would call each other aren't we?" Lionel winked at Lex and Lex resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He instead glowered, his head in his hands. "Somebody's in a bad mood today. I wonder why. . ."

Hmm. . . I wonder. . . thought Lex sarcastically as Lionel approached the two sitting on the couch.

"Um, Mr. Luthor if we could begin. . ." Chloe pressured and Lionel raised a finger to silence her.

"Yes, well I'm afraid we'll have to reschedule."

"But. . ."

"Something important came up that I can't afford to miss. I do have one favor to ask of you though. . ."

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" I AM NOT TRYING THAT ON!" Lex screeched and Chloe and Lana sushed him. "I refuse to be subject to this torture! Why do I have to try it on? Can't we just buy it!" he hissed to the two females standing in front of him.

"Look. All you have to do is try on this one pair of jeans so we know your pant size, okay?" Chloe held the low rise jeans out to him. Lex stared angrily at the two girls before snatching them out of her hands.

"Your not coming in with me!" he snapped. Lana put up her hands as if surrendering. Lex marched off the dressing room and the two girls followed to make sure he came out.

(Five minutes later. . .)

"Come on out, Lex. . .iss." Lana begged and remembered to call him by his girl name.

"NO!"

"Are they too small?" Chloe asked, her arms crossed, obviously frustrated.

"Too big? Too low?" Lana tried it guess.

"No. . ." Lex moaned.

"Then what the hell's the problem!" Chloe threw her hands up in the air. The door to the dressing room finally swung open and Lex had managed to pull the jeans on under his dress.

"They're a little. . . too. . .tight." Lex glowered and signaled down there. Chloe sniggered.

"Oh. . . I forgot about that. . . thing. Sorry. We can stick to guys jeans. A lot of girls are wearing baggy pants these days." Chloe watched as Lex slammed the door closed and listened as he grunted to pull off the pants.

After they finally got some pants that didn't reveal so much, they moved onto the shirts and dresses.

"How much crap are you getting me!" Lex whined as he saw Lana layer a sixth shirt onto the growing pile. "I'm only getting enough clothes until I can pretend Lexiss has to go back to Iowa or Illinois or wherever the hell she's from!"

"Couldn't you have just left last night?" Chloe inquired as she grimaced at the putrid green color of a shirt she just pulled off the rack. Lex made a face and told her to put it back and picked a red one instead before answering.

"Yeah, well I was tired and it was one o'clock in the morning. I refused to walk. Where was I supposed to go. . . NOWAY, Lana. I'm not even going to look at it anymore." Lex and Chloe were looking at a formal dress.

It was long and the straps were very skinny and went down the back to form criss-crosses that ended just past the shoulder blades. The dress was a little deeper than stop sign red and sparkled. It was a beautiful dress.

"Come on, Lex. . . iss. What happens if your stuck at the mansion as the girl and he throws a party?." Lana waggled the dress in front of him so the sparkles caught the light.

"Why would he do that? This is my father we're talking about!"

"But what if he did?" Chloe joined in. Lex furrowed his eyebrows and scowled.

"I'd politely decline." Lex explained but Lana and Chloe weren't finished.

"What if you couldn't decline?" Lana pressured. Lex moved in closer.

"Look. . ." he hissed for the second time that day. "I would rather jump off the roof of the tallest building in Metropolis and land in a pool of hungry alligators than wear that dress to ANY STUPID PARTY THAT MY FATHER ISN'T EVEN GOING TO THROW!" he yelled in his normal voice causing quite a few shoppers to stare in his direction.

"But what if he does?" Lana asked, not phased by his yelling and still holding up the dress. Lex stared murderously at Lana for a good minute.

"Gimme the damn dress." Lex mumbled as he snatch it out of Lana's hand. "I'm telling you though," Lex said as he stomped off to the cashier. "my father isn't one to just decided to throw a party. Never!"

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I bet you know where this is going. . .