A/N: This story is a bit lacking in the department of humor, but you really can't surpass our last two chapters, well we hope you enjoy it anyway. Toodles!

888

Cee: Guess who's Back!

-Cricket chirps-

Ker- Uhm… hello? –echoes-

-Tumbleweed rolls by-

Ker: TUMBLEWEED! –chases- Come play with me, Tumbly!

Cee: uhm, Kerri?

Ker: Can't talk! Must capture, I mean… play with Tumbly! –continues to chase tumbleweed-

Cee: -smacks forehead and mutters 'idiot'- Anyway, After a long break, A LOT of therapy, and a rather large demand, WE'RE BACK!

FFX Crew: Oh dear Yevon! No!

Tumbly: -rolls off cliff-

Ker: TUMBLY NO! –jumps off cliff after-

FFX Crew: -throws mini party-

Cee: OH MY GOD, KERRI!

Ker: -flies back up, tumbly in hands- Yes? –tilts head to left-

FFX Crew: -bangs head on wall- WHYY!

Cee: uhm… right –ignores FFX people- Kerri! Tell us a story!

Ker: Uhm, ok. Well it all began when God created the world, then he created man, and of course he then created the rifle for man to fight off the dinosaurs and… the homosexuals…

Cee: Much like Wakka here –holds up rifle-

Ker: Now, Cee is going to demonstrate how to use a rifle properly when hunting one of these elusive Queers.

Cee: Watch carefully everyone. –crouches down and slowly sneak up on Wakka, disguised in a pink beret… in a hushed tone- Now you must be quiet, you do not wish to disturb the homosexual.

Wakka: -picking his nose-

Cee: Now, watch what I do. –carefully positions rifle and aims it for Wakka's head- BONSAI! –Jump out from behind rock and whacks Wakka in the back of the head repeatedly-

Ker: NO NO NO NO! YOUR FORMATION WAS ALL WRONG! Give me that! –grabs rifle- This! Is how its done –smacks Tidus upside head with the rifle-

Tidus: -eyes cross and falls to floor-

Ker: -takes swig of Sake- That's how its done!

Auron: -glares at Ker- That's my line… -searches for sake jug- AND THAT'S MY SAKE!

Ker: -eyes go wide- uhm… CEE DID IT! –Tosses sake jug at you-

Cee: -gets hit in head with sake jug, passes out-

Ker: …shit…

Auron: -glares menacingly- You, dearest Ker, are in for a whole world of hurt.

Ker: Yes, but… LOOK! A DISTRACTION! –points behind him-

Auron: What! Where! –turns around-

Ker: heh, sucker… -flees-

888

-a few hours later-

Ker: I'm bored…

Cee: Me too. Let's go on a Quest!

Yuna: what kind of quest do you need a hero?

Ker: -eye twitches- Can it be a 'Kerri kills Yuna' Quest?

Cee: KER! This is only rated PG134!

Ker: PG 134? –confused look- what?

Cee: uhm… typo? –shifty eyes-

Tidus: So, this quest! What are we going to go questing for…

Ker: -give Tidus look- is questing a word?

Tidus: In Tidus land it is…

Cee: -inches away from Tidus- YES! SO THE QUEST LETS GO!

Lulu: But, what is the quest for…

Ker: To find a way to ultimately destroy each and every one of you… -laughs evilly-

Everyone: -gives Ker look-

Ker: … did I say that outloud?

Cee: Didn't we have a discussion about using our inside voice?

Ker: -scuffs foot on ground- yes, ma'am.

Wakka: HOW MUCH LONGER TIL WE GO ON THIS QUEST! And… does it involve shopping? Because I'm sorry Tidus, but those pants so clash with that shirt. You're more of an autumn yellow, instead of this Spring blue that you are sporting.

-room goes silent-

Kimahri: It quiet… Kimahri go

Cee: -jumps on his back- I'M RIDING A COUCH!

Ker: -mutters 'you ride more than a couch…'-

Cee: what? –gives confused look-

Ker: nothing, nothing –walks away whistling innocently-

Rikku: I don't get it, what do you mean she rides more than a couch?

Lulu: I believe that's what you call a bad sexual innuendo.

Ker: Oh I'll innuendo you!

Lulu: … what?

Auron: And that is what you would call a bad come back

Ker: That's it! –mauls Auron-

-27 and a half minutes later-

Tidus: I'm bored, this quest sucks!

Rikku: -bouncing around- Yeah! There has been no fighting!

Ker: well that's all bout to change! Look! A fiend! –points to old woman-

Yuna: Ker, that's an old woman

Ker: -turns and glare- You don't call me Ker, you call me Empress Cindy Crawford

-Everyone blinks creepily at the same time-

Ker: Anyway, Look! –points to old woman again- A fiend!

Cee: Ker, she's a poor defenseless old woman. Look for god's sake she has a cane and fighting her would be cruel and unnecessary.

Ker: Don't be fooled by her clever disguise, she is obviously a fiend!

Cee: … what the hell is wrong with you? Did you forget to take your medication again?

KeR: NO MEDS FOR ME! YOU'LL NEVER MAKE ME TAKE IT! NEVER! WHAHAHA!

Cee: Ker, I think you should have stayed in therapy a little bit longer…

Ker: Wow, what a coincidence, so did the doctors!

Cee: then how are you… oh… my… god…

Ker: uhm… -shifty eyes- I'll save us! –runs towards old woman-

Cee: Oh dear God….

Auron: She's seriously going to attack an old woman?

Ker: -trips over pebble- AHHH SHE'S GOT ME! SHE'S GOT ME! –spaztically rolls on ground- She's bewitched me!

Cee: -smacks forhead- Someone go help her

Seymour: I'll do it!

Cee: WHEN DID YOU GET HERE AND WHY AREN'T YOU STILL DEAD? Didn't I kill you after that cage incident…

Seymour: Yes… well… about that… LOOK I HAVE FLAMING HOT PANTS! –Rips off leather pants-

Cee: AHHHHH –Runs to Kerri- Are you ok?

Ker: Don't! It's too late for me! Go save yourselves! –does over dramatic acting pretending to die-

Everyone else: ok! –walks away-

Ker: -cracks an eye open- What the hell? –jumps up- WAIT FOR ME! –runs after-

-two hours into the quest-

Cee: this sucks…

Tidus: Screw this, I'm going to Tidus land!

Ker: Can I come?

Tidus: uhm.. ok… -shrugs-

Ker: Oh look I'm in Tidus land!

Tidus: Goodie Goodie gum drops, in Tidus land we don't wear clothes… see?

Ker: AHHHHHHHH ESCAPE FROM TIDUS LAND! ESCAPE! ABORT MISSION! RETREATT! RUN FLEE GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!

Cee: -slaps Kerri across the face- SNAP OUT OF IT WOMAN!

Ker: but… but… look! –points to Tidus –

Cee: -turns and looks- oh dear… but… where's his…

Rikku: Weiner! Get your hot wieners here

Wakka: Oh I'll have one

Ker: of course you will…

Wakka: what, ya?

Ker: uhm… TIDUS IS NAKED!

Auron: What where! Oh, I, Uhm, I mean where is Tidus Naked because I want to see him…

Cee: uhm… WHAT THE HELL? IS EVERYONE FREAKIN GAY?

Ker: I'm not!

Yuna: Or are you?

Ker: -serious face- Shut the fuck up, Yuna. Stop trying to be like me, you skanky whore.

Yuna: I, uh, i… -eyes well up with tears- WAHHHH!

Cee: Oh my god, someone shoot her in the head… please… and if you miss her, at least get me!

Lulu: guys? Isn't this place remotely familiar?

Tidus: Looks around, Why it does… but I can't quite place it… maybe I should run around frantically in my naked state… -runs around frantically in his naked state-

Ker: and you people say I need medical attention…

Tidus: -runs into clothes line-

Cee: GREAT GOOGILY MOOGILY! –runs over to him-

Tidus: Thank you, Cee, I'm glad someone-

Cee: -steps on Tidus' face over to clothes line- We have found what we've been questing for! –holds up leopard G-string-

Ker: Oh my, let's all marvel in its awesomeness…

All: -marvel in its awesomeness-

-fives minutes later-

Cee: I wonder who this previously belonged to…

Ker: I don't think we'll ever know…

Wakka: Well, I think I'll hold onto it… for … safe keeping… -grabs G-string and shoves it down his pants-

Auron: You know, I think I know why this is so familiar a place… it's Wakka's backyard…

Lulu: SO WE WALKED FOR HOURS JUST TO COME BACK WHERE WE STARTED?

Cee: Yes. So?

Lulu: … uhm… I don't know…

Ker: Wait… if this is Wakka's backyard, then that clothing line belongs to Wakka, and whats on the clothing line belongs to Wakka, then OH FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS CUTE AND FUZZY! Wakka! I didn't know you had the little bunny foo foo board game!

Cee: Yeah! Wh- wait… HOLY MOLEY! THAT… THING.. THAT I WAS HOLDING… WAS… YOURS!

Wakka: No its not?

Tidus: Yeah, sure whatever you say, Sir Prance a lot…

Wakka: what's that supposed to mean?

Tidus: Thank God, Yevon, Machina… whatever, I never got the urge to pants you in public or I, and the people of the world, would have been seriously scarred for life…

Cee: Well I think we all learned a very valuable lesson today during our quest

Tidus: That we should rob from the rich and give to the poor?

Cee: … uhm… not quite…

Auron: That the code of chivalry is to always be upheld when in battle…

Cee: yeah… or no…

Lulu: That love overcomes all obstacles

Ker: HAHAHAHA

Cee: You can take that as a NO

Kimahri: That you should keep your friend close, but your enemies closer

Cee: close… but… no

Rikku: Always respect your elders

Ker: Or! Always keep a weapon at close to maul your elders is more like it –glares at grandma-

Cee: Ker, put down the knife…

Wakka: Honesty is the best policy

Ker: -mutters 'that's funny coming for the closet dweller'-

Cee: yeah… nope

Yuna: Good will always conquer evil!

Cee: Get a life, Yuna .

Ker: NO YOU ARE ALL WRONG! The life lesson we have learned today is that questing is not a word, and that Tidus Land is a very, very, very scary place!

Cee: Exactly! Now until next time, good night everyone!

888

A/N: Btw I own nothing!