A/n: Song is Only Ashes by Something Corporate. Don't eat me SC haters!!! I'm sorry!!! melts Oh, and Lestat is the sex. Do not argue. There is no argument to be made.

Oh & yes, Aria is a brat goth. She likes to curse to make herself seem cool. xP But she's so fun to write!

Last note: the grammar mistakes are abundant, I know. I'll try to go over my chapters & see if I can catch them. Sorry!

Wishes Don't Come True

Chapter Four

I can tell as you turn

I smell the sulfur so clear

And fire's a beautiful sound

I'm sitting in the common room, leaning on Carl, and pretending to be paying attention to the conversation. Aria and Lucie are arguing about whether or not Lestat is just about the sexiest thing ever to come into existence. I fail to see the point to the dispute, seeing as how Lestat is A) a vampire, so not in existence, and B) a book character.

Aria sighs despairingly and throws herself back onto the couch dramatically. "None of you understand my undiluted suffering!" She turns her head to shoot Mim a grin/snarl. "Especially, you, Mim. I mean, any human being who finds Looois attractive in any way is off their fucking rocker!" She cackles manically, and jumps up again. She's in a good mood today.

Mim yawns loudly, and smiles slightly, as if in apology to everyone. "Sorry guys, she's been like this all day. Since about five in the morning."

"Aria is right for once, Mim," Valeria interjects. She doesn't look up as she speaks, but keeps staring at what she's sketching on the paper. Everyone turns to gaze at Valeria in barely concealed amazement. Valeria and Aria. . . agreeing? "Lestat is sexy. I mean, he's strong, smart, beautiful, etc, etc."

"And eternal." Aria adds dreamily, her eyelids fluttering prettily.

I twist my face inwards, burrowing myself in Carl's chest. This conversation is stupid and pointless and. . . I wonder what Calvin is doing. The little angel on my shoulder pinches me, and guilt runs through me. It doesn't feel right to be thinking about Calvin (even though he's only a friend) when I'm in Carl's arms.

But yesterday had ended up being more enjoyable that I had expected it to be. Who knew that dinosaur facts were so fun? Calvin beat me, of course. He had matched every fact I knew with three more. I hadn't felt that energetic with something educational in a long time. I missed that feeling I used to get when I came home with good marks.

Our group seemed to have dissipated, though, so Calvin's test was failure. Anyone who might have told Carl how I gripped Calvin's arm when I saw that giant sperm whale about to eat a squid had ditched the group for a better experience.

"I didn't see you yesterday, Suzz." It takes me several seconds to understand that Valeria was talking to me. I reluctantly lift my head from Carl's cigarette smoke smell.

"Were you expecting to?" I keep my voice and face blank, hoping to. . . well, Gaia, she isn't going to bring up questions I don't want to answer.

"Yeah. I couple of us ditched the trip and headed around on our own." A grin splits open her face, and her expression seems grotesquely twisted. "Almost got caught, too. But you weren't with us? Were you inside or something?"

Carl lifts his arm from my shoulder and holds me an arm's length away, a questioning look on his face. "She's right. Why didn't you ditch?"

I have to work even harder to feel my expression blank. I feel like I'm the edge of laughing just at the memories. Either that or crying from this pressure. Calvin had been as strange as I had remembered him- but that wasn't the matter at hand, was it?

"I was . . . walking around with the group-"

"But surely you must have noticed-"

"-with Calvin." The silence is absolute from the whole group. Well, for all of five seconds.

"Calvin?!" Aria screeches, and launches herself onto the sofa I'm sitting on. I raise my arms to cover my face and protect myself from her assault. No attack comes, though, and I peek through my lowering arms at her.

She isn't about the hit me. She's staring at me intensely. She perches herself on the sofa, like a gargoyle up on a church steeple. Her eyes are frighteningly lovely once you stare at them long enough. They look a normal brown at first glance. But they are sharp, and they cut through my outside appearances like knives. I feel so exposed, so naked, being stared at so openly.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I can not stand this silent interrogation, and I push myself up, glaring at Aria angrily. My hands are balled up in white fists, and I can not for all my self control stop myself from shaking. "What do you think you are, physic?!" I turn around to look at Carl. Oh god, does he think. . .?

He's staring up at me in disbelief, his carefully outlined eyes just confused, and an eyebrow raised. "She's crazy, Carl," I manage to gasp. I'm losing my cool because some girl stared at me? God, I'm as bad as she is. I steal a glance at her. She's still perched there, a stone monster only contained by the light of day.

I walk out of the common room, my temper flaring. Why should I have to defend myself, just because I was hanging out with Calvin? I'm only allowed to approach Goths? No. Calvin's words keep popping into my head. He thinks I care what people think.

He's the first person to ever say that to me. He hadn't said it straight out, but I know that's what he meant. Everyone else in my life had always congratulated me on my individuality, so that I had just assumed they were right. Why did one person's opinion change everything?

I'm outside now, and I have to squint for a few second to get used to the sun in my eyes. It feels like summer, but I'm wearing my long sleeved black turtleneck. I frown, wondering why I even dared to put on such a thing in this weather.

The grounds are empty and I'm glad. I don't feel like talking to anyone. This Calvin business has turned me upside down and I need some time to sort it all out.

I sit myself down under a tall tree. Buggered if I know what it's called. Maybe Calvin knows, I wonder, my thoughts once again slipping to the scraggy boy. Calvin always seems to know stupid, trivial facts no one seems to know, or care, about.

Stop it, Suzz, I scold myself. I need to look at the situation for an aloof point of view.

Fact number one: Calvin was a little weirdo- okay, not being aloof, Suzz.

Fact number one: Calvin was strange and delighted in teasing and grossing out S- The Subject.

Fact number two: He would not be separated from his toy tiger, named Hobbes.

Fact number three: In fourth grade he burned down the elementary school. He was sent away. Hobbes was scorched. It feels to The Subject that he- it has died.

Fact number-

"Fuck!" I cry, standing up again. "This isn't working!" I lean against the tree, holding my face in my hands. God, I'm probably smudging my eyeliner. I feel a hopeless feeling making my heart sink, and I let my arms drop. I suppose I should head to my room. Sitting with nature hasn't balanced out my tortured spirit. Maybe sleep will.

What about Hobbes, I think for the first time. Hobbes was Calvin's life, once upon a time. How long must if have taken Calvin to get over Hobbes? I mean, he was as attached to the toy in fourth grade as he had been in first. But no, I don't want to think of the tragic ending of the nearly realistic toy tiger.

While walking into my dorm room in Sleeping Room One, I notice a small paper taped hastily to the door. I have to lean forward to read the small, cramped, letters. It doesn't help that they're going every which way, as if the writer is doing it on purpose.

It says Susie. I rip the paper off the door as I look around, even though I know this floor is deserted. I enter my room, stepping lighter, perhaps, than I usually might have. Sitting on the edge of my bed, I open the fold piece of paper silently, and I read the contents.

I saw Susie sitting in a show shine shop. Where she sits she shines, and where she shines she sits.

"Huh?"

A/n: is scraggy a word? WORD IS MAKING MY LETTERS ALL CAPS FOR SOME REASON. and its not caps lock. doesn't matter.

Thank my speech teacher for that lovely tongue twister.